Fuck Yeah Deagles Classics (gun sperging allowed in this thread) -

[The Dude]

I've been perusing Jace's Tumblr today, going back to some old school Jace content. It gave me a headache.

I thought it would be nice (read: masochistic) for us to share some of our favorite posts from Our Pet Marine's blog.

http://parkourdude91.tumblr.com/archive

 

[Arctic]

http://parkourdude91.tumblr.com/post/36761459055/sacred-fox-submitted-some-hot-bitch-with-a

 

[DeagleDad420]

It's going to be basically impossible to post about Fuck Yeah Deagles without sperging about Jace's failure to understand guns so I'm going to temporarily rescind that rule as long as it's contained in this thread

http://parkourdude91.tumblr.com/post/36761459055/sacred-fox-submitted-some-hot-bitch-with-a

That looks like a tranny

Some other good ones

• Jace rants about haters and attempts to intimidate them with a stainless steel 10$ knife
• Jace "believes in legalize" because he saw a picture of some airsoft faggot laying in a bunch of weed plants
• Sacred-Fox trolls Jace with a ridiculous story about the Specops stolen from MW3, Jace buys it

And some more (I can't put all of them as direct links because XenForo is autistic)

http://parkourdude91.tumblr.com/post/39164676458/thats-one-hell-of-a-way-to-make-an-entrance-haha - Sperging about John Cena

http://parkourdude91.tumblr.com/post/34413933071/question-which-gun-is-better - A really good post of him sperging about guns and getting everything wrong forever

And a classic screenshot showing his atrocious old layout before I Kame redesigned it for him, featuring the comments on some retarded pic he put up. He thinks "duel wielding" is real

 

[waffle]

Mosin Nagants are weaker than a .22...

 

[FlyAwayNow]

Good Christ, I almost forgot the second reason why I got so caught up with this guy: weapons.

Yes, ask the Germans that Nagant is weaker than a .22. Not even the rifle, but even the revolver.

Yes, the Desert Eagle is outlawed in the US because of Obamacare and is the cutting edge in CQB situations and every firefight.

Yes, a P90 in its purest form is totally legal in the US.

Yes, you can compare the XM8 rifle to the G36 series, especially since the XM8 totally isn't a weapon that hasn't seen a day of combat action as opposed to the G36s.

That firing range story though put most of my grievances to rest however, anything he says about weapon handling is just definitively lies he can't speak otherwise about.

 

[WachtAmWeb]

oh god, the good old days. "SLOPPY WET CUNT" and "Cuntsplash" were me.

 

[Dutchbash]

Good Christ, I almost forgot the second reason why I got so caught up with this guy: weapons.

What's the first reason?

 

[FlyAwayNow]

What's the first reason?

The impersonation and the subsequent blatant disrespect of the US Military's personnel.

 

[WWWWolf]

http://parkourdude91.tumblr.com/post/36761459055/sacred-fox-submitted-some-hot-bitch-with-a

Just like they say theres nothing better than a hot chick with nice boobs but when you throw in a deagle to sweeten the deal? Wow thats just the icing on the cake dude. Sick.

Translation: Jace, spooing in his pants: "Oh god that chick is sexual. BUT THAT DEAGLE IS EVEN MORE SEXUAL"

In light of today's psychology research, Sigmund Freud's classic theories of psychology have been largely superceded by more recent research. But even so, examples turn up that are eeriely similar to these old theories.

[/drunk]

 

[DeagleDad420]

Translation: Jace, spooing in his pants: "Oh god that chick is sexual. BUT THAT DEAGLE IS EVEN MORE SEXUAL"

In light of today's psychology research, Sigmund Freud's classic theories of psychology have been largely superceded by more recent research. But even so, examples turn up that are eeriely similar to these old theories.

[/drunk]

Oh, while we're on this topic, there's this (slightly NSFW) - the girl in the photo looks about 15 or 16, but Jace is undeterred. At the time a lot of people made comments about Jace being a pedophile. On one hand there's not much to suggest that directly other than a few really minor hints (there was one video where a girl was leaning on Jace's shoulder and she looked about 14 - but we don't know anything more than that) but on the other hand I wouldn't be remotely surprised if he turned out to be a pedophile considering he basically admits to preying on juggalos with low self-esteem and most, if not all of his associates are at least 5 years younger than him.

 

[The Dude]

oh god, the good old days. "SLOPPY WET CUNT" and "Cuntsplash" were me.

Jace wouldn't know a cunt If it came up and queefed on him. He hasn't seen pussy since he was born.

The thing I love about FYD is it is pure distilled Jace. It sums up his absolute cluelessness and lack of knowledge about firearms, the military, and life in general quite aptly.

 

[WachtAmWeb]

Jace wouldn't know a cunt If it came up and queefed on him. He hasn't seen pussy since he was born.

The thing I love about FYD is it is pure distilled Jace. It sums up his absolute cluelessness and lack of knowledge about firearms, the military, and life in general quite aptly.

oh definitely. I think the classic FYD era was so hilarious because Jace was trying his hardest to get his Stryker persona across, at the same time as exposing how dumb he was.

 

[The Dude]

oh definitely. I think the classic FYD era was so hilarious because Jace was trying his hardest to get his Stryker persona across, at the same time as exposing how dumb he was.

I always like to imagine him speaking his FYD posts in his hardcore Stryker voice, the same one he has used to try to intimidate FlyAwayNow and other trolls on the phone. It just makes everything he's posts that more pathetic and hilarious. Give it a try.

 

[Ariel]

 

[Andrew Noel Schaefer]

Wheres the one where he talks about soliders getting mod kits for their guns?

Now I really wouldent know, but wouldent it be like, the quartermaster and such who decide what kind of things get slapped onto the weapons for a solider or squads specific role? Anyways fuck that. Level up. Get mod kits, mod your gun.

 

[The Dude]

Much like Jace's mom, this meme really gets around.

 

[Clown Doll]

but wouldent it be like, the quartermaster and such who decide what kind of things get slapped onto the weapons for a solider or squads specific role?

I've got the idea that SEALs have a specific gunsmith who'd tune their weapons the way they wanted pre-mission from the infosplosion regarding Navy SEALs following the assassination of Osama Bin Laden.

 

[The Dude]

I've got the idea that SEALs have a specific gunsmith who'd tune their weapons the way they wanted pre-mission from the infosplosion regarding Navy SEALs following the assassination of Osama Bin Laden.

SEALs and Delta basically get to configure their weapons to their own personal tastes and requirements. They have "issued" weapons, but they also have other stuff that even Green Berets don't have and can use anything they want that's in their inventory. They do have their own gunsmiths that service their weapons for them.

 

[niggers]

Oh, while we're on this topic, there's this (slightly NSFW) - the girl in the photo looks about 15 or 16, but Jace is undeterred. At the time a lot of people made comments about Jace being a pedophile. On one hand there's not much to suggest that directly other than a few really minor hints (there was one video where a girl was leaning on Jace's shoulder and she looked about 14 - but we don't know anything more than that) but on the other hand I wouldn't be remotely surprised if he turned out to be a pedophile considering he basically admits to preying on juggalos with low self-esteem and most, if not all of his associates are at least 5 years younger than him.

not to be one of those "ephebophile isn't the same as pedophile!!!!!!" people but jace is probably attracted to younger chicks because his entire persona revolves around being this badass stoner/parkour/skater super youthful guy - as opposed to a preference for children. an unemployed 16 year old that skates and smokes weed and lives with his folks is average, a 23 year old man in that situation on the other hand, is pretty weird. jace will do anything to escape that reality. hell, he posted a tweet about getting a haircut, with #lifeteen, when he hasn't been a teen in four years. don't get me wrong though: it's creepy as fuck regardless of reasoning.

single adult women tend to have jobs or an education, actual friends, their own place, the ability to not be impressed by cheap vodka and reggie etc etc. plus, they've probably had boyfriends that have had those things. that shit probably terrifies jace. it's way easier to liquor up 17 year old girls and buy rogaine. (not saying jace could even manage that, we've yet to see any proof of anything. my islams are on virgin.).

damn i'm off topic

 

[DeagleDad420]

not to be one of those "ephebophile isn't the same as pedophile!!!!!!" people but jace is probably attracted to younger chicks because his entire persona revolves around being this badass stoner/parkour/skater super youthful guy - as opposed to a preference for children. an unemployed 16 year old that skates and smokes weed and lives with his folks is average, a 23 year old man in that situation on the other hand, is pretty weird. jace will do anything to escape that reality. hell, he posted a tweet about getting a haircut, with #lifeteen, when he hasn't been a teen in four years. don't get me wrong though: it's creepy as fuck regardless of reasoning.

single adult women tend to have jobs or an education, actual friends, their own place, the ability to not be impressed by cheap vodka and reggie etc etc. plus, they've probably had boyfriends that have had those things. that shit probably terrifies jace. it's way easier to liquor up 17 year old girls and buy rogaine. (not saying jace could even manage that, we've yet to see any proof of anything. my islams are on virgin.).

damn i'm off topic

Not off-topic at all, I think that's 100% spot on. Jace has never shown any sexual interest in children, but it's only possible for him to form any connection with 15 year olds because he is psychologically and emotionally still 15 years old himself. The fact that he can drive and has money and access to copious amounts of weed and alcohol is just the icing on the cake for him in terms of seducing fat Juggalo teens. This is why, all things considered, I honestly do not think Jace is a virgin. I think he's a weirdo creep who preys on teen girls, but I don't think he's a virgin, nor a sexual predator in the traditional definition, nor do I think there's any true malicious intent behind it. He is a clueless manchild more than anything.