Lovequest Gross DNAsicles -

[Marvin]

So yeah, some dude shared this with me privately.

I'm like the Edward Snowden of gross Chris videos.

Anyway, watch this if you hate yourself.

I'm pretty drank right now.

 

[cumrobbery]

Hand em over, Chris.

 

[XH 502]

Love how Chris has the camera strategically pointed at his chest- THE FUCK?

Jesus Christ, how long before Barb accidentally eats Chris' year-old frozen sperm after she mistakes it for ice cream?

 

[MarineTrainedTard]

"I put out a fresh sample earlier today"

Thanks for sharing, Chris, that was very important informatio- OH GOD.

I just imagine Barb opening the freezer to find some shitty Banquet meal to reheat for dinner and finding Chris's "samples". I imagine at this point she'd just sigh and shake her head before moving on.

Also, I forget why the video-frame-whatever keeps moving, what the fuck?

 

[John Daker]

>regrets the things he's recorded in the past
>immediately films his frozen semen collection.

 

[Alberto Balsalm]

"That was, like, less than a year ago."

Spoiler

 

[The Man With No Name]

"There are collection and storage kits that allow you to initially collect and freeze your sperm specimen at home, but are not intended for storage in your kitchen freezer. The necessary temperature for maintaining sperm viability is far colder than a home freezer maintains. Specialized kits sold by only a few andrology clinics are designed to let you manage the collection process in the comfort of your own home. They can be purchased and shipped to you for about $350. (Please go to www.nwcryobank.com). These kits maintain the necessary frigid temperature for up to about a week, providing plenty of time to store several specimens for return to the andrology clinic. The kits include the necessary sterile implements for collection."

So basically Chris has a bunch of Tupperware filled with inert ejaculate in his freezer. There seemed to be a lot of it.

 

[AnchuentProphecy]

That's disgusting.

 

[XH 502]

The dream of bringing Crystal into this world will never die.

 

[Chan the Wizard]

Who wants some salty ice cream?

 

[Holdek]

He's saving it for summer time when he prefers his on the rocks.

 

[bearycool]

It is official, everyone: Chris has done the impossible and has made me straight.

Also, we now know what cummies look like... I wish I never did.

 

[ChrisIsGay]

So I take it Barb doesn't care that Chris is storing his nasty jizz in the freezer?

 

[Chan the Wizard]

So I take it Barb doesn't care that Chris is storing his nasty jizz in the freezer?

She can't make it upstairs.

 

[zap2theextreme]

Whoa this really is a next level recycling technique. He's really stepping up his game.

 

[NumberingYourState]

This is the kind of vile, repugnant Chris I cheer for.

Jesus Christ, Chris, how horrifying.

 

[Asandy31]

So yeah, some dude shared this with me privately.

I'm like the Edward Snowden of gross Chris videos.

Anyway, watch this if you hate yourself.

I'm pretty drank right now.

I love Marvin, please don't have a change of heart and take this vidyea down, it's proof of why Chris' navy would only be handled by someone wearing a hazmat suite
Yeah, freezing your sperm in a commercial freezer will do the exact opposite of what you intend, I bet after Chris shot that he expected video cameras and sperm banks to show up on his doorstep and fight for his navy, which he would then evenly distribute amongst the crowd.

I just hope Barb did not mistake it for gravy when Thanksgiving rolled around

The dream of bringing Crystal into this world will never die.

Unlike every sperm cell Chris will ever produce

I bet though, that a fat autistic male who claimed to be a lesbian transwoman was the selling point

 

[SteelPlatedHeart]

I could have gone my entire life not knowing this.

 

[Ido]

My theory: He was looking at a mini-fridge before the gamestop incident happened, that one sample was from May and he's been serious about this for a while. Since Barb apparently suggested he get it I think she knows and whats him to keep his frozen cum elsewhere. Anyways, he needs to let this go (geddit?)

 

[Hellfire]

"The only things that I'd regret would be the, uh, things I've recorded in the past that I was blackmailed into doing.... or against my original will that I would never do personally or figularly(?)."

The shifty eyes during this statement...