Guntology: A study of the Earth's most grizzled stomach - Discussion of the Gunt itself. What even is that thing??

[Simply Outplayed]

I've thought about this a lot since seeing the video and am guessing that he probably has diastasis recti, a separation of the two groups of abdominal wall muscles. This condition is ordinarily seen in women as a complication of pregnancy, but can occasionally be seen in men as well, generally as a result of visceral fat related to severe obesity.

Here is a man before and after developing a mild case of diastasis recti - note that his stomach is also slightly bifurcated vertically right in the middle:

View attachment 2038764

Of course, Ethan has so much subcutaneous fat that he also has a massive wall of flesh hanging down from his stomach, which combined with the visceral fat-induced muscular separation would lead to an unusual distribution of fat, potentially causing a bifurcated gunt of the sort seen in the video. To get a gunt like this one, you'd need to have both a large amount of visceral fat and a large amount of subcutaneous fat, which doesn't happen for everybody even if they're severely obese.

This analysis is speculative but it's the best explanation I can come up with and is definitely not in any way medical advice.

UpToDate

 

[Delicious Diversity]

Since we have new wild gunt footage, taken in the natural mating grounds of east coast white trash, I shall present it here for further study:

If any budding guntologists would like to provide further analysis to contest @Haru Okumura 's excellent thesis I welcome your input.

 

[RickestRickCriminal]

Since we have new wild gunt footage, taken in the natural mating grounds of east coast white trash, I shall present it here for further study:

View attachment 2058889

If any budding guntologists would like to provide further analysis to contest @Haru Okumura 's excellent thesis I welcome your input.

I'll have to conduct further research on this specimen. I am not an expert but learning medicine sounds more interesting than hearing the kill report. I suggest we pursue the area of biomathematics to carry out experiments/simulations in silico to understand how gunts work. Maybe that's a key to understand complex systems like the immune system, I don't know. I am retarded and alog a fat white trash.

 

[Insane In The Membrane]

There is a logical explanation for the shear mass and blobanatomy of this particular gunt.

This is due to years of combining alcohol, drugs, pedophilia and zenophobia. Ralph is a criminal, a nazi, a pedophile and an alcoholic. When you combine all those aspects it creates a disgusting mass that molds together over time. It was in its infancy after he was released from jail. You can see it building from that infamous picture with Coach Abortion Pill and Dick Molestation. All the stress from fucking that 17 year old girl made it even larger. And after all the alcohol, drugs and seething, it has reached a critical mass that can only get bigger from here. It's only a matter of time before the Gunt eventually gets too big and explodes like Michael Moore in the Team America movie.

Ironically, he looks exactly like Ralph.

 

[Funkmaster]

To understand the Gunt better we need to look at the lineage and genealogy.

Ronnie Ralph
It's almost certain from this image that Ronnie, Ethan's Absent father, has potential guntforce capability.

Sandra Ralph
From Sandra, birther of the Gunt, we see not only gunt potential but signs of deformation and loose skin elasticity likely to explain the weird contours of the gunt itself.

Evan Ralph
OK skitzo theory time. Mythos would say Evan is the Gunt's special needs, wheelchair bound brother... But what if it was a LIE from the Gunt (what a shock) to distance himself from his brother who has fled to MA as a successful realtor?? Could it be??

...ZOOMENHANCE...

redfin.com/real-estate-agents/evan-ralph

The appearance is uncanny and topped off by the gunt genetics clearly at play. Was Evan his father's favorite gunted offspring, fed first at mealtimes by his mother growing tall while the gunt of the litter was forced to cower in his shadow??

Could it be.... TRUUUUUUUUUUUU????

 

[AnOminous]

The appearance is uncanny and topped off by the gunt genetics clearly at play. Was Evan his father's favorite gunted offspring, fed first at mealtimes by his mother growing tall while the gunt of the litter was forced to cower in his shadow??

It looked like Evan inherited all the good genes there were to inherit, while the Gunt inherited the genetic garbage, and is like the cast-off refuse of his entire family's gene pool, created as a pitiable monster so that his other relatives could be at least quasi-human.

 

[Big Fat Frog]

I know I'm entering the realm of Speculative Guntology with this one, but I think I have determined a possible defensive/offensive use for the gunt itself. We can see the spewing of verbal bile Ralph emits on his world renowned Kill Report™ and his Twitter manages to gather a wealth of jannies within the replies or in the chat. My guess is if the gunt manages to get damaged, a massive rupture may occur due to the internal pressure and explode. This will not only destroy the gunt, but coat its immediate surroundings with this bile in a form of mutually assured destruction. This would then summon a massive horde of jannies in an attempt to "sweep up" the damage that has been done.

Due to the increasing size of the gunt, my hypothesis is that the gunt is only gonna get bigger and its presence more pronounced. Therefore, I claim this as its "second stage." I can only imagine what the third stage could behold...

Spoiler: Artist rendition of the speculative third stage

 

[Seminal Ointments Lain]

It looked like Evan inherited all the good genes there were to inherit, while the Gunt inherited the genetic garbage, and is like the cast-off refuse of his entire family's gene pool, created as a pitiable monster so that his other relatives could be at least quasi-human.

If you look at post-release skinn(ier) Ralph, he doesn't look so terrible. Laziness, a horrid diet, rampant alcoholism will thrash even the Overman. But chiefiest of all the evils that warp him, the resentment, trauma, existential terror. Even the least self-aware sods have crippling moments where the wave of reality come crashing down. The Gunt is much more than a physical blight. It's true power results in self-hatred, self-neglect, the demand to perpetuate abuses likely suffered as a child. His damage must be justified. His self-hatred must be right.

The gravest tool in the Gunt's unholy arsenal is not raw fatty matter, but extreme negative reinforcement. A boundless bulbous nightmare. What terror Evan must feel when out of the glimpse of his eye he sees the memories and the realities so viciously kept at bay. We are so blessed, that we may part the net at any time be rid of this evil. But he may not. The Gunt is in his blood. Like twins seperated at birth, the rancid demands of The Gunt are ever-present in his life also. He fights them every day, but, every day Ethan gives in and The Gunt, their Gunt, grows in power and influence and reach.

Evan cannot escape the fate that was decided for him. Even now, in the dead of the nights following the best days of his life he hears it. Ehcoing in his flesh. He startles awake this night, hearing many homes away: "Daddy! No!"

 

[Drew Pickles 69]

It is widely speculated that Ethan Oliver Ralph is responsible for a myriad of skunk ape sightings between 2007 and 2011 respectively.
One local Florida resident Dave Shealy claims to have encountered the creature saying "It was walking across the swamp, my brother spotted it first. But I couldn't see it over the grass it was to short," Shealy says. "My brother picked me up and I saw it, about a hundred yards away. We were both kid's then but we'd heard about it and we knew what we were looking at. It looked like a man but it was wearing a snap back and shorts, it smelled horrible."

Judging by the skunk apes range it seems that it's natural habitat does in fact overlap into Virginia. Skunk apes are sedentary creatures and only leave their nests to forage or look for mate's.
Ralph's habits are surprisingly similar despite making concerted attempts to blend into society, whatever it's intentions are still remains a mystery.

​

 

[RickestRickCriminal]

How do those gunt belly cells even work?

 

[jell0]

"Study of the Girth's most grizzled stomach," is what I thought I read.

 

[AnOminous]

Therefore, I claim this as its "second stage." I can only imagine what the third stage could behold...

I knew this was coming but still kekked.

 

[Gefaustet]

I wonder what type of micro biome exists in the gunt's naval. I image its like the Galapagos islands, with the gunt's largess protecting a variety of unique sub-species never seen by man.

 

[RichardRApe]

I wonder what type of micro biome exists in the gunt's naval. I image its like the Galapagos islands, with the gunt's largess protecting a variety of unique sub-species never seen by man.

Probably a lot of anaerobic bacteria since there's no sunlight that can enter for photosynthesis.

 

[Uncle Ben's]

I fear the demon baby for it may yet surpass its father in sheer Guntiness. Only time will tell if I am merely a doomsayer, or a prophet of the worst to come.

 

[Terrorist]

More evidence for the theory of FTM Ralph: The widening of the gunt-labia matches with Xander's gestational timeline almost perfectly.

The last time we saw the gunt, before Xander's conception, there was far less cleavage. We saw pictures of an ultrasound on Ralph's twitter, but who it was being given to was out of frame. Meanwhile, we have no fucking idea what Faith looks like below the neck at this point, because she's only posted closeup selfies. The most recent pic from Fai is a quilt accidently spliced with the pic of the ultrasound...could it be that she took the picture, and Ethan was on the operating table? As iirc Godwinson observed, Faith is built like a man with broad shoulders, and we only ever saw her from behind...

Ever wonder why the kid will be named Alexander Matthew Bruce Vickers instead of Alexander Matthew Bruce Ralph? Because Faith is the father! "I'm gonna cum on that fuckin cock" - Ethan Ralph, to Faith.

 

[Laquisha Guntermensch]

I wonder what type of micro biome exists in the gunt's naval. I image its like the Galapagos islands, with the gunt's largess protecting a variety of unique sub-species never seen by man.

Interesting. Ralph does seem to have protection, but I fear it's from the feds rather than his gunt.

 

[Shiggy Diggster]

I'm thinking that it's within the realm of possibility that the Gunt is the host of the universe's fattest Trill symbiont.

 

[MeltyTW]

It is widely speculated that Ethan Oliver Ralph is responsible for a myriad of skunk ape sightings between 2007 and 2011 respectively.
One local Florida resident Dave Shealy claims to have encountered the creature saying "It was walking across the swamp, my brother spotted it first. But I couldn't see it over the grass it was to short," Shealy says. "My brother picked me up and I saw it, about a hundred yards away. We were both kid's then but we'd heard about it and we knew what we were looking at. It looked like a man but it was wearing a snap back and shorts, it smelled horrible."

Judging by the skunk apes range it seems that it's natural habitat does in fact overlap into Virginia. Skunk apes are sedentary creatures and only leave their nests to forage or look for mate's.
Ralph's habits are surprisingly similar despite making concerted attempts to blend into society, whatever it's intentions are still remains a mystery.View attachment 2062249View attachment 2062250

​

that would be some shit if ethans line was actually an interfertile species of secluded hominid who some human fucked and bred with,

 

[AnOminous]

Ever wonder why the kid will be named Alexander Matthew Bruce Vickers instead of Alexander Matthew Bruce Ralph? Because Faith is the father! "I'm gonna cum on that fuckin cock" - Ethan Ralph, to Faith.

Imagine being such an absolute cuck manlet that your own child isn't even named after you. Imagine being cucked by nobody.