Artcow Half-dude / Ian Knau - Car Fucker

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Hello Kiwis.

Now don't get to excited, I'm only popping in to say some things that I'd wished I'd gotten said before going silent. I just recently saw a couple deviantart troll accounts comment on my art there, and from experience those only happen usually when something's been said here and I get a day or so attention again. Not surprisingly I'm right! So why not say those things now while the thread has attention drawn to it again anyway..

It's amusing that even Farmers admit that the way I was treated at my last job is bullshit, probably boarderline illegal. I thought I'd clearify that yes it is as absurd as first assumed.. there's nothing I did to make my firing more justified. I literally made a post relating to myself being OS, and the next day I was fired for it. They claimed it was because multiple coworkers saw it and were made to feel uncomfortable and what's why. To which I say.. well you should be finding some thicker skinned employees if that's the case. But I know what the real reason is, it was saving face. They're incredibly image conscious with their perfect little track record and I was simply seen as too risky to keep around.. plain and simple. I'm now sitting on an HVAC schooling certificate I worked my ass off on trying to make something of myself that's a useless piece of paper..

I was able to replace Lilly's struts myself, as you guys have said, I know that she's getting to the age where it's a dam you're trying to patch, but what else can I do? If someone you love is sick you'd do anything you can to help them wouldn't you? I know you wouldn't agree to Lilly deserving the care a person or pet would but that doesn't really matter in the end its how I feel. I'm holding back the tide so far, I'm very mechanically proficient and have done all repairs myself, where I probably would have spent thousands on her so far I've probably spent hundreds instead doing the work myself. She's worth every cent though.. sorry... I love her, and I care about her.

I don't want you guys getting excited as I don't plan to post regularly again. To be truthful I enjoyed most of my time here with you all shooting the shit. I said it before and it wasn't to make myself just sound tough and unphased, but I actually enjoyed trash talking back in the day with you guys. I saw it as a perfect little exchange. You guys get someone to poke fun of, and admitedly.. I was using it as exercise, teaching myself how to have a thicker skin and deal with being picked it. Someone in my position is probably bound to have it in real life at some point, so why not pracise on it online ahead of time you know? Hear all the possible insults that some of the internets most talented trolls could think of so that I can better deal with it in the future because I've heard it before you know?

When I lost my job things became real for me. I was on my way to becoming a productive member of society, to finally making something of myself. Then in the course of 24 hours that was taken away from me, all that invested time. I had a lot of time unemployed then to sit on the fact that I have to try and get myself back on the horse again, all while having "Ian knau Car Fucker" be the top result under my name in any google search. Do you know how hopeless that makes looking for work feel? Any effort into searching, interviewing, and making phone calls possibly being made pointless with one inevitable employer's google search on me. That's why I left here, I saw no good that could come from giving the thread further hits and attention, and I'd just hope it would fall down the search results after awhile. Its obvious that's never going to happen now, I'm just hopefully fucked..

I can see how a site like this can be useful, when it comes to exposing truely harmful people such as pedophiles and the like. At the end of the day I'm just an average guy trying to make it in the world like any of you, hopefully making something of myself someday, the only thing that that seperates you and I is that I like to fuck cars in the privacy of my own home. On the surface I'm completely normal, I'll leave the fact I was employed somewhere for 8 months with a secret that'd get me fired all along as testiment to that. Anyway how many of you don't have something odd you enjoy in private? At the end of the day I don't understand how its something that I deserve to be outed for like some predator for. Take your hits at me online all you want, I accept that, someone being open online like I am needs to be. But leave it at the door when it comes to my actual life you know? Anyway that's why I confided in Null to remove my name from the thread title, and why I left once I was denied.

I guess if anything you guys do HAVE incentive to do change the title, because honestly if this thread was just about poking fun at my online alis Half-dude I'd be all on that.. I'd come back and participate with you guys like the good ol days. I know a lot of critism gets thrown my way for not being smarter online. I should have hid my powerlevel, I shouldn't have put my real name anywhere where it could be found, I shouldn't have been stupid enough to talk about my car shit on my real Facebook. Hell I shouldn't have even been stupid enough to friend anyone from work. But you know what? Congratulations guys, you've educated me, you've shown me why that's the case, as well as my firing showing me how dangerous being out in the open about your real self is and I've made efforts to improve myself in those areas.. you've gotta get burnt by the stove to learn that a stove is hot you know? A perfect example, my real name was found on my Deviantart, which was an account I created when I was a little kid who didn't know puting my name online was dangerous. My point is this.. you can't blame someone for failing at the rules of the internet when they were never told of them until after the fact anyway.

The irony is that because of this threads existence I can no longer take actions to hide my powerlevel. Having the alis Half-dude was a big measure, and this thread now links that name to my real self with a simple search of either name, and at this point I can't even change my name as neither art sites allows it. The shitty thing is that now that you guys have shown me how important it is to be anonymous on the interent is, I now can't take the knowledge into practice.

Last thing. I wanted it to be known that the Yesa person Null showed himself fighting with through email months back assuming it was me, wasn't me. I'd told the guy, a friend and fan of my art, about my concern over my name being in the thread title that he saw it to try and take actions himself. I'd like to think you guys have a little higher opinion on my intelligence then to think I'd outright insult and goad Null like he did. Frankly I had no idea what the guy was saying to Null until he said "sorry" and sent me a screencap of what happened.

So yeah, that 'buying a domain of my name' wasn't even deserved because I literally had nothing to do with it.. he can check the IP addresses location it was emailed from and see.. so anyway thanks for that I guess...

Anyway off I go again... bye.
Well shit call it the day where you get pitty hombre but you could change your name then try contracting. Ive done private security. Long hours dangerous conditions but great pay.


Cuddly Spacebug
True & Honest Fan
Thanks guys, I appreciate the well wishes. Seems like the chaos of unemployment is one problem Farmers and Lolcows can actually empathize with each other on, it's nice to see.

If you guys do honestly care, then allow me to please ask, if you do have any position of power or pull here maybe you can talk to Null about changing the thread title to Half-Dude Car Fucker instead? That way Google eventually re-indexes and my name is no longer there as a keyword? I've tried talking to the guy and asking nicely but I think he just hates me by default.. I can't get a word in with the guy. < : / You guys have said in the past one of the times this thread died down that this thread didn't even qualify as Lolcow anymore so.. I don't know. Like I've said before, I don't care about this thread's existence, you guys have every right to have a thread up about me and laugh at/with me as much as you want.. all I ask is that you aim that at Half-dude, the alis I created to be my car-fucker persona..

As a token of good intent, I'll share with you guys one of my newest works in progress. While I'm not one myself I wanted to create a drawing catering to the foot fetishists of the world.. or I guess in this case the tire fetishists... heh.

View attachment 911650
Even with the aforementioned confusion about the other guy trying to get your thread taken down, it's still unlikely to happen. The only thing I can suggest is emailing Null, explaining the situation, and if he feels like it there'll be a vote. Given your notoriety, I don't think it'd go in your favor when taken upon the community. The only thing I suggest is try to bring up that you've never actually gotten into serious e-drama. Personally I'd vote no because you can literally be summed up as a car fucker. It's funny a few times but that's it. There's no point in having a thread about it because you don't really do anything else that the site would consider noteworthy.

I do have another suggestion for you though. Employers typically hire other parties to dig into employees' internet histories. If you're able, do yourself a favor and google your full name, and I mean including your middle name. See how long it takes for the site to come up in incognito. If a few pages or more, you have a decent shot at hiding in plain sight.

I may be jumping the gun on something in my mind, so I wanna drag @AnOminous into this before I say anything else and ask something: Exactly how legal is it to fire someone based on fetishes?


μολὼν λαβέ
True & Honest Fan
Retired Staff
I may be jumping the gun on something in my mind, so I wanna drag @AnOminous into this before I say anything else and ask something: Exactly how legal is it to fire someone based on fetishes?

Unfortunately unless it's a very specific set of things like race, religion, national origin, sex, or otherwise, there's no general protection against being fired for any reason or no reason. In some states, and some cities, sexual preference or sexual identity is protected against employment discrimination, but that isn't at the federal level and is usually only accepted things like homosexuality or transgender discrimination (and the latter is still uncommon).

Employers typically hire other parties to dig into employees' internet histories. If you're able, do yourself a favor and google your full name, and I mean including your middle name.

In some states employers are limited in the amount of dirt-digging they're allowed to engage in.

That also would be an employment law thing and not something anyone should take advice from anyone about, other than a lawyer in that state or locality who actually practices that kind of law. You're generally at least entitled to unemployment compensation if you're fired for stuff that isn't employee misconduct, and stuff you do in your own private time generally is not.

Jeanne d'Arc

Running Up a Massive Tab
I would just change your name, my dude.

Stay on the internet as Ian Knau/Half-dude, as your Deviantart and Twitter and god knows what else are already associated with those names, and change your name but do not post your new name ANYWHERE near your car-fucking shit. Preferably not anywhere on the internet, if possible.

Changing your name will afford you the opportunity to practice good opsec a second time around and still engage in your fetish under your name/you won't have to worry about people using archives of these pages or other instances you may have forgotten about to blackmail you. You seem pretty run of the mill outside of your fetish and obsession with your car (that said I think we all have things we're autistic about), and if you can practice good opsec under a new name I really do think things will go smoothly for you (that and nothing would need to be taken off the internet, something near impossible to achieve in this age).

Piga Dgrifm

Assigned Hitler At Birth
True & Honest Fan
Name-changing may be a big hassle, but it might be wise at this point, maybe you can get away with only changing your surname since your first is so common. And don't put your new name anywhere near your dA or FurAffinity or anything else you have online.


Ian Knau
Person of Interest
I thought about changing my last name months ago, my dad's a piece of shit anyway.. let his last name rot for all I care.

But then after thinking about it I figured it was pointless. Employers ask you to state any previous names you've ever went by, not to mention my license and any certifications I've earned are under my real name.. plus my birth documents and SSN..


Cuddly Spacebug
True & Honest Fan
Yeah no, a name change isn't this get out of jail free card you all keep seeming to push it as for him. The best he can really do is hope he gets an employer that, if they find his stuff, shrug after going "lol wtf" and hire him based on his value as a potential worker.
It sucks he cannot legally do anything about his previous job, because firing him for being a weirdo and having employees complain about it when it really doesn't concern them is just beyond unethical. How hard would it have been for his boss to say "I don't care if it doesn't happen here, stop complaining."


Null/mods will sometimes move threads into Spergatory if the subject of the thread asks nicely and there's not much interest in it.

Fuck that, his thread was dead years ago but he came back to repeatedly bump it for attention, it was actually locked because of him attention whoring so much. Plus, it'll be funny to watch him flip the fuck out as his shitbox/lover disintegrates from lack of maintenance.

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