Careercow Hard Rock Nick / Nicholas Rock Johannsen / Aly Ashley Jash / Big Dick Nick -

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I wish I had kept the dossier goons compiled on him. It was amazing and it's a shame he got so much negative attention because he's really locked down his content now.

He worked at a Benz dealership and always took pics in the cars like he owned them. Every day he'd post some awful meal on the same blue plate and talk about his personal chef. He had like, 2 pickup lines. One was something about eating sushi in bed in LA and giving a girl the best fucking of her life and the other was basically the same but it was lobster tails in bed on the Greek coast.

He'd do that Russ thing where he'd take selfies in the gym. Never broke a a sweat and always skipped leg day.

Oh yeah! The name "hard rock nick" was from when he wanted people to believe he was part owner of the Hard Rock cafe, he'd post pictures of himself eating there a bunch and always talk about how he was part owner.


"I've been getting pussybeamed"
Schizophrenia and amateur marketing. Name a more iconic duo.


I'll wait.

behavioral swamp thang

thots n prayerz
So, real talk, this guy internet harassed me for a hot second. He found my instagram and started messaging me like crazy, I was barely legal at the time, so this was before he was mildly internet famous. He told me he owned the Hard Rock Hotel and Casino in Las Vegas. I sent him a screenshot of their wikipedia page where no one by the name of Nicholas Johanssen was mentioned. I told him he was a flat out lie and he just persisted, even when I ignored or blocked him, he would make new accounts to message me. I couldn't believe this fucking dude who looked like a egg shaped genie faggot with these insane youtube vids talking about his huge cock was at my beck and call, so all of my friends would have me message him to see what insane shit he would say next. He claimed he lived in Calabasas and all sorts of crazy lies, similar, but not identical to the posts mentioned here. Which lol of course he fucks up his own bull lol

Anyway, I stopped playing around with him when I cut my hair. He was so mad. He sent me message upon message berating me for changing my hair, calling me ugly and all this shit. I went ghost. He still messages me about once or so a year on different accounts, just saying stuff like "hello" and nothing else. When I saw him go mildly viral and found out he took a shit in Jeff Goldblum's ex's sink I about pissed myself. Last I heard (2020 maybe) he was a bag boy at Trader Joes.

"Where am I?" He asks.

Nick, you're in the nosebleeds looking like you're about to cry. Why can't someone with $750k in jewelry get ringside seats?

What's with his sunken eyes? Makeup or diabeetus?

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