Has a Lolcow ever “won“? - no matter what, the farms always win

[Gasthefurfags1488]

SammyClassicSonicFan, if any. I'd say he's prolly doing better and the bullying he went through smartened him up to stop him from becoming another Chris Chan. I mean he was just a kid with a little too much time on his hands, I'd say the Sonic Fanbase is no longer bottom tier on the internet, which has been overtaken by Bronies, Furries, SJWs, and SU fandoms. I am sorta glad he got better because as repulsive as some lolcows are you cant help but feel bad for some of them.

 

[Calandrino]

Pretty much all the gamergate hoes won if you want to consider them actual lolcows.

I would not, if anything we're cows for the likes of ZQ. I find her story strangely cathartic: I can sleep easy knowing that it's not just in my head, the world actually is insane.

 

[Purin Chan]

SammyClassicSonicFan seems to have grown up a bit. Dude's a student at Purdue on track to graduate in 2021. He hasn't uploaded a vid to his YT channel in like a year, probably busy with classes.

Could you even consider Sammy a lolcow? I mean the dude was like 15 when he made those videos, I get that was still a little too old to be acting that childish and immature but still, we all do stupid stuff as minors.
Although, he is quite an iconic piece, even if you couldn't brand him as a traditional lolcow.

 

[Schlomo Silverscreenblatt]

For me the only way you can consider a lolcow as have won is if they completely ghost the people who laugh at them for an extended period of time. There's probably tons of people like that but I can't name any off the top of my head, and that makes me wonder. Do the ones who get arrested and CAN'T post online get a W?

 

[Therealhomor]

I've seen situations where one person was trying to troll another person, turn them into a lolcow, and they got so spergy about it that people got sick of it and turned it around on them. I guess you could call it "trolling blowback." It ends with their troll becoming the object of mockery while their would-be victim gets off scott-free. It's pretty hilarious every time it happens.

 

[Travis Touchdown Cumsock]

Could you even consider Sammy a lolcow? I mean the dude was like 15 when he made those videos, I get that was still a little too old to be acting that childish and immature but still, we all do stupid stuff as minors.
Although, he is quite an iconic piece, even if you couldn't brand him as a traditional lolcow.

Apparently, the STOP HATING ON SONIC video was a performance art and he purposefully acted over the top for comedy purposes. And it got taken literally? But no way to verify if this is true, or simply backpedaling.

Regardless, it's clear that Sammy has grown into a person who is nothing like in that video and there's nothing to gawk at anymore.

Other people can and have made big turnarounds, but most lolcows are lolcows because they lack the necessary self-awareness to improve.

 

[cumrobbery]

Could you even consider Sammy a lolcow? I mean the dude was like 15 when he made those videos, I get that was still a little too old to be acting that childish and immature but still, we all do stupid stuff as minors.
Although, he is quite an iconic piece, even if you couldn't brand him as a traditional lolcow.

Sammy was RIGHT.

 

[Next Task]

Could you even consider Sammy a lolcow? I mean the dude was like 15 when he made those videos, I get that was still a little too old to be acting that childish and immature but still, we all do stupid stuff as minors.

I don't know about the rest of the Farms, though I get the feeling a lot of people agree - under 18s get a pass for a great deal of tardation because they were kids, and kids are morons. And worse, morons who think they're not. So kids aren't usually considered lolcows as much as just ... kids.

Doesn't stop some of them from staying lolcows into adulthood, but maturing out of previous stupid behaviour is what happens to most kids - and what many if not most of our lolcows are unable to do.

For me the only way you can consider a lolcow as have won is if they completely ghost the people who laugh at them for an extended period of time. There's probably tons of people like that but I can't name any off the top of my head

Not being remembered is about as good as you're going to get for a lot of lolcows. 'Winning' is hard to quantify, and getting off the KF radar doesn't count, but it's a start. There's many lolcows who are still doing the same old thing, but they got boring so their threads stagnated, rather than because they improved.

I guess I think of winning as a lolcow legitimately being able to say 'I sure showed them!' about us, in which case the closest any of them has come is probably Vordrak getting the Farms down for about a month. There may be others I'm not thinking of - @Jaimas is the true cow historian - but my thinking is that our continued existence prevents cows from winning.

Self-improvement out of cowdom is a victory, but not against us so much as against themselves.

 

[Elwood P. Dowd]

Dunno if she counts, being more celebucow (to coin a phrase) than anything else, but AFAIK there are no pictures of Felicia Day with her 90 year old fossil of a husband on-line anywhere. And she somehow still also has paypigs sending her shekels for her "quirky gurl on teh internetz" shtick.

As an aside, her 2017 book has over 40,000 reviews/ratings on Goodreads while her 2019 book only has 895 to this point. Quite the drop-off. So maybe the paypigs are moving on to younger models?

 

[timecop]

barneyfag has always been on top. he is the eternal guardian, a paladin of morals, a knight in shining armor

 

[Pee Cola]

I think Terry won.
He died before the CIA niggas could kill him.

I concur.

Terry also went from being a lolcow to a folk hero because of his deeply misunderstood (and flawed?) genius; TempleOS being the most obvious manifestation of this.

Whilst he may not have died a rich man, he's unironically enriched the lives of thousands just by being Terry.

 

[Glowie]

Sammy the sonic fan escaped Chris' fate due to his parents.
Put on meds, regular therapy and is attending school regularly.
Team carried him out of lolcowhood, but still something to consider.

Lack of inbreeding, degenerate upbringing and shite parents that Chris had for example works.

 

[Syaoran Li]

If @Cowlick is smart (Haha no) he can make his thread fade into obscurity. A win.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but hasn't his thread kind of faded into obscurity already. He hasn't been seen on the Farms in a while last time I checked, and his lolcow status was only fueled by the fact he was always posting in his thread trying to defend his honor or something.

I don't think Cowlick ever smartened up to just stop posting on his own, I think he probably just had his internet cut down by some external factor we don't know about.

Or he's found some other online community to go sperging around in.

 

[Bob Barker]

-Getting their history completely wiped off the Internet/forgotten about
A few have I think, the removing content help page says that 5 people have gotten their threads removed.

-Successfully used Twitter screenshots as evidence to get somebody arrested
The guy who tweeted a rainbow gif at Kurt Eichenwald is expected to plead guilty. Don't know if there are any other cases.

-Made more money as a lolcow than they would before they were discovered
I'd say a majority either make more money as a result of being "discovered" by kf or communities like kf, or make about as much as the would have without us.

 

[Broseph]

Majin Dee on Instagram: “Merry Christmas! Have a great holiday tomorrow. Thanks for subscribing to my Instagram, much appreciated 😉🎅🎄🎁⛄ #merrychristmas…”

18.8k Likes, 623 Comments - Majin Dee (@the_imperishable_sammy_zenith) on Instagram: “Merry Christmas! Have a great holiday tomorrow. Thanks for subscribing to my Instagram, much…”

www.instagram.com

He uses Instagram now

He kinda looks like a troon in that picture, but at least he's not sperging over Sanic anymore.

 

[TheImportantFart]

Kind of an obscure one, but I guess Paul Latza? He went from being a Channel Awesome wannabe who got trolled into driving to Milwaukee to audition for RedLetterMedia to working as an editor at Disney and Nickelodeon. Ironically he achieved more success in the world of film than the people he most admired who are now almost all lolcows in their own right.

 

[theshep]

Use your name next time, faggot.

OK FINE. I will use this.