Sounds less like a cow and more like someone I want to be friends with.Here's Preston Brooks, a pre-Civil War pro-slavery Democrat Representative who is famous for having beaten Senator Charles Sumner with a cane on the floor of the US Senate. Sumner was an abolitionist Republican, and had been making speeches before government bodies denouncing slavery and the Kansas-Nebraska Act. Brooks almost beat Sumner to death and Sumner couldn't return to Senate for three years.
To be "fair", Sumner did attack one of Brooks' relatives during the speech that inspired the assault, which had occurred two days prior. Brooks wanted to challenge Sumner to a duel, but after talking with one of the bois about dueling etiquette, he decided a duel was unnecessary as dueling was supposed to be between gentleman of equal social class, and to him Sumner was basically on the same level as a homeless drunkard. So, he was going to beat the shit out of him publicly.
Before this, Brooks was expelled from college shortly before graduation due to making firearms threats and challenged future Texas Senator Louis Wigfall to a duel in which he was shot in the leg (and therefore carried a cane for the rest of his life).
Probably not a big cow but I think he should get some kind of lol-status. Maybe a lol-donkey, because Democrat?
Satanic panic gurus are amazing. He's not really historical but check out Ruzz Dizdar, he's a truly exceptional individual who rants about how 100 million satanists are killing tens of thousands of babies every year in the US. He's also got a vigilantes posse who go around harassing senior citizens who they decide are nazi satanist agents.aimee semple mcpherson, an evangelist turned cult leader who tried to fake her own kidnapping. She's an interesting woman.