How are you doing? - Kiwi Farms Wellness Check

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Digital Thunder

Uh... Kweh?
kiwifarms.net
Had a first, and have other firsts coming up. Opened an independent bank account for the first time, have an upcoming appointment with a speech pathologist for the first time in maybe a decade (my verbal speech is pretty fucked), and starting post-secondary studies in less than two weeks. Continuing to struggle with feelings of detachment from anything I'm doing IRL, a lack of creative confidence where it matters most for me (music/audio), and that sense of drifting along without purpose.

I'm sure I've shown my age, and my feelings can be attributed to an age crisis of my own, but I've had just about enough of feeling like shit when I don't really have anything to justify it.
 

MerriedxReldnahc

World's Okay-est Proctologist
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
I've been doin' pretty damn good lately. My last few years at college were kind of rough partly due to hitting the mandatory life crisis one hits at 23, being around shitty people, and being neurotic in general ;), so I took a year off after just to focus on my art and do volunteering stuff.
I love the job I have now, it's super entry-level but with a huge amount of room to grow so I'll have to see where that takes me. Working makes me so much less anxious than being a NEET, so I'm finding that I've bounced back from the mopes and am my usual bad bitch again. Art shit is taking off too. Now I just need to work up the cojones to ask out a certain sexy man.
Sending all my fellow Kiwis Bad Bitch energy. May you kick ass in all your endevours.
 

Recoil

Tactical Autism Response Division
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
I'm finally getting used to being alone again. It snapped into place tonight, this familiar old feeling of standing alone in the world and being perfectly okay with that. I wish it hadn't taken so long.

have an upcoming appointment with a speech pathologist
Work hard on that, it changes your life big time and builds lotsa confidence. Go for it.

Turned 31 today. As autistic as this sounds, I spent it taking my parents to see the new Lion King because one of my favorite memories as a kid was when they took me to the original. It's honestly not as terrible as people make it out to be.
After 30, time with your parents takes on a different feel. Maybe it's them getting older, maybe it's you being more of an equal. Whatever the reason, savor it. Learn who they really are, get a feel for the color of their souls that you couldn't have when you were younger.
 

DNA_JACKED

kiwifarms.net
Dealing with burnout at work after working 60+ hour weeks for close to a year, dealing with constant political barrages by people that dont understand polite conversation and idiotic decisions by the same people that cant bother to read a simple rulebook. Also had a nasty sinus infection for the last 3 days. Having so much fun.

I cant wait for the listlessness of my early 20s to be over.
 
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Parson Weebs

Plus Ultra (further beyond)
kiwifarms.net
To be honest, I'm a bit shaky. It's been a tough week for me and my family and I let my anger get the better of me last night in a cow thread. I got MOTI. Little more chill now, but still feeling a bit volatile. The political situation in my country is a bit crappy atm, so that's pissed me off, though at least that puts my nation in good company. I found myself reading about serial killers last night, and, and this might be a modern technique, I found reading about Gacy's crimes really did distract me from my own troubles and stopped me feeling sorry for myself. There's something disturbing but coolly interesting about crime cases. Will have to marathon CSI in Portuguese at some point.

To sum up, I'm trying not to feed the flower of darkness within myself. There are pleasanter, kinder, wiser soils not far from despairs.
 

Just a boring name

Jesstified Ancient of MuuMuu
kiwifarms.net
Had my first long absence from work this week - I love my job and have built my little one woman business from scratch.

Gotta wait 2 weeks for a scan, Doc has told me to refrain from all exercise (my job IS all exercise) until they know what's wrong, all she has said is that there seems to be a "Grumpy, Unhappy Uterus".

I'm bored, I'm in pain, I'm uncomfortable standing, sitting or walking, I'm pissed off, but KiwiFarms has provided good respite while lying in bed.
 

Surf and TERF

kiwifarms.net
I’ve been getting back pain from what is probably an SI joint slipping out of place. This is genetic and I knew it would happen, I just wasn’t expecting it in my 20s.

This is frustrating because I haven’t been able to run and I probably won’t be able to start again.

I’m telling myself that I’ll get a membership to an aquatics center and start swimming in the morning. It is fun to think about. I just hope the novelty doesn’t wear off too soon after I start.
 

Parson Weebs

Plus Ultra (further beyond)
kiwifarms.net
Hey y'all. I'm feeling a bit distracted and dysfunctional. I keep cocking up basic things with my flatmate, making me look like a disinterested asshole. For getting to turn the heater on, stuff like that. It's embarrassing for me and I feel for my friend.

I've realised I've built up an abrasive internet persona over the years to avoid being hurt by life, but really it's just making me rude, almost bigoted, surly and unpleasant to be around, or at least at the moment it is.
 
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