How are you doing? - Kiwi Farms Wellness Check

  • Despite what alcoholic retards are saying, there are no plans to shut down the Kiwi Farms.

Oban Kamz

His camera is on, His wallet is full
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Your stupid avatar; I legit thought this was Null doing a copypasta. I was like "Null is married with child...? Wat", haha.

Anyway, I'm pretty good. Not as sick with a cold as I was (I know, terrible timing), getting more shit done, being more optimistic and most of all, having fun again because I've been chatting up an exciting new friend.
well it is a copypaste
 

Guts Gets Some

Don't lose your way
kiwifarms.net
Something happened to me today. I got into a fight with an elderly uncle I haven't seen in well over 25 years over my mother's account on social media. He's completely brainwashed by the left and that's all he blithers day in and out, ironically to people who only put up with his bullshit, not agree with him.

Even though this isn't something I want to do, my anger came out and I insulted him in front of everyone. Well deserved, yeah, but I just always wanted to be someone who could take the diplomatic approach vs pettiness; I just have trouble because I'm a burning passionate person and those feelings come out first, logic later. Hasty nature, I guess?

Well, after doing that, I kinda began to realize from it how to actually temper that metaphorical flame inside me as just a fuel source, rather than let it burn unrestrained like before.
Like, a truly strong fire is one that doesn't budge with whatever is thrown at it. Not one that sways easily in the breeze.

Thanks to him and that, I actually got a lot more perspective on the why's and how's to actually go about this change I've wanted for awhile.

I pity my uncle tremendously, and he's just as sad as you think he is, but hey, he helped me still. Ironically the opposite effect he was going for, but unlike him, I feel so much more potential now than ever. Add in a few other great things that have been happening that I'm so excited for, this supposed 'peak' of Corona is only having the opposite effect on me. They wanted to drive me down, but I only feel better and better. The flame just is getting stronger, more stalwart, and hotter. But now with more proper control.
 
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Chan Fan

Quarantine Queen
kiwifarms.net
Kind of tired but otherwise doing okay, did everything I wanted to accomplish but with slightly less enthusiasm
 

Guts Gets Some

Don't lose your way
kiwifarms.net
Kinda upset.

A girl I befriended on a penpal site over a year ago; when I really needed to find people, up and ghosted me for six months finally just came back out of nowhere and admitted it was in fact intentional ghosting.
We really clicked and it was a lot of fun talking to her; of course, romantically we didn't work, but finding a passionate new friend was still always fun.

Well, she comes back, admitting to ghosting and that she's been through rough times. Understandable, but I told her time and again ghosting is the ONE THING that upsets me. It always has the opposite effect on me and is one of the worst things anyone can ever do to me. People, friends especially, can always tell me anything, but don't expect me to read minds.

Not only that, but she disregarded everything we had been talking about and just wanted to 'start over' and worst of all 'keep it casual'. With me. The guy who can always turn a sentence into a paragraph when talking to people. This is just me.
So basically, to sum up, she ghosts me for 6 months and comes back making demands, or expecting me to just go along with it until it invariably just happens again without warning.

I wrote and rewrote my reply to her to try not to sound bitter, but to bring up why this bothered me. And when I finally had it, of course even that's too much and now she doesn't want to talk at all and just retreats further.

Man, then talking to me as the friends we once were clearly isn't what you're looking for. I'm not the type to flat out just humor people who clearly need real help and tell them what they want to hear. It might not be what you want to hear, but it's these kind of words that truly make us grow and overcome. It certainly never happens when people give us what we're asking for, especially when we're not even really sure what it is we want.

I'm upset this happened. I never said I didn't wan to talk to her, listen or anything, nor that she upset me past just opting to ghost rather than give me fair warning, just that 'casual' talk with me isn't something I do well without muting who I am, or that I didn't just immediately submit to her demands like being out of contact, being brushed off time and again when I was genuinely worried about her when she flat out vanished out of nowhere, didn't matter at all.

In any case, I tried to recommend her either some real life therapy, or at the very least, maybe a forum community to join in the meantime. Believe me, registering here did help me back in late 2018, so if she wants to have fun and casual conversation with people who won't overly saddle her, maybe it could be just what she needs for now.
I can't give her that.
 
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LolNoIPLeaksEvenLMFAO

yellow fever
kiwifarms.net
Went to an “illegal” party. Even with out the lockdown it would be illegal kinda deal. Shit was fucking dope we had the cops called on us but just boiled down to “get fucked” they tried calling backup, but no one was available lmfao. Fuck this bullshit and never forget what makes moonshine taste so good - the lack of federal taxes.
 

Virgo

P̢̘̋͋̀͢AṆ͌T̛͖̞͛̌ͅON̟̄̊͟E̪̓͊͞ ̣͍̽̈́4̻̭̀͡8̻̃̄͒̃̈͢5
kiwifarms.net
My house and life is chaos, it's driving me fucking bananas, and I'm trying to figure out how to not be afraid of plans, schedules and routines. They make me feel boxed in and not in control but I need them... It is difficult for me to tell myself that they are tools for success instead of monotonous prisons.

First of all I'm going to look at "block scheduling" which is where you have blocks of tasks that go together for certain amounts of time. When the block finishes, you move onto the next thing to stay on track instead of obsessing and losing track of time.

Secondly I will make a house maintenance and general routines book. This is referenced as a "control planner" by organisation peeps. It is reusable and contains the every day cleaning and life systems you have so you can stay on top of things.

Thirdly I have to make my dreams actionable. I have all of these amazing ideas but zero chunks of specific time to do them... So my dreams remain dreams. I'm hoping that sorting out routines and block scheduling will solve the overwhelming problems that come with living alongside a toddler, and leave me room to plan my goals.

All together, I will be setting it up digitally with Google Calendar with cues from Alexa, my phone and my watch so that I am notified x10 to get up and do shit.

It's difficult for me to break big things down into actionable steps so that is my next challenge. How to not be afraid of what it takes to achieve what I'm supposed to. My attention span sucks so the pomodoro method and short chunks of timed cleaning will kick my ass into gear...

I've lived chaotically just about my entire life, was not taught organisational skills, etc, so this is a new venture for me and its kind of scary. I feel really dumb for having to learn about this from scratch but at least I'm doing it. Undoing a chaotic mindset is not easy and it's a daily fight to do what needs doing so I don't get behind.
 

Malagor the dank omen

Drakwald's most coveted goat
kiwifarms.net
I've found that I'm much happier keeping a running list of stuff to accomplish rather than "okay let's see here what do I want to do today?" So yesterday I had a very specific order I wanted to do things in, all of it at home, and I didn't get sad or feel as down. I hope to do the same today :)
The shrink already told me i should do something like this, but i'm erratic as all hell in my activities and that erodes my own motivation to do stuff. I'm restless as all hell and i don't have enough interesting things to do around. Maybe i should pull the same tactic and focus each day of the week in one specifi task.
My house and life is chaos, it's driving me fucking bananas, and I'm trying to figure out how to not be afraid of plans, schedules and routines. They make me feel boxed in and not in control but I need them... It is difficult for me to tell myself that they are tools for success instead of monotonous prisons.

First of all I'm going to look at "block scheduling" which is where you have blocks of tasks that go together for certain amounts of time. When the block finishes, you move onto the next thing to stay on track instead of obsessing and losing track of time.

Secondly I will make a house maintenance and general routines book. This is referenced as a "control planner" by organisation peeps. It is reusable and contains the every day cleaning and life systems you have so you can stay on top of things.

Thirdly I have to make my dreams actionable. I have all of these amazing ideas but zero chunks of specific time to do them... So my dreams remain dreams. I'm hoping that sorting out routines and block scheduling will solve the overwhelming problems that come with living alongside a toddler, and leave me room to plan my goals.

All together, I will be setting it up digitally with Google Calendar with cues from Alexa, my phone and my watch so that I am notified x10 to get up and do shit.

It's difficult for me to break big things down into actionable steps so that is my next challenge. How to not be afraid of what it takes to achieve what I'm supposed to. My attention span sucks so the pomodoro method and short chunks of timed cleaning will kick my ass into gear...

I've lived chaotically just about my entire life, was not taught organisational skills, etc, so this is a new venture for me and its kind of scary. I feel really dumb for having to learn about this from scratch but at least I'm doing it. Undoing a chaotic mindset is not easy and it's a daily fight to do what needs doing so I don't get behind.
I know the third one too well. You feel terribly restless because despite the time and effort you put into it, you feel as if you are not advancing towards your goal and that is frustrating as all shit. Specially when you have to do so much.

For me, things haven't been any better since i get sidetracked constantly either because things don't go the way i want, because i lose interest or because i'm burnt out. This last one has managed to halt my writing efforts considerably, even if i wrote 100 pages in 2 months, which is already quite decent but not enough for me. Nothing is enough.

I would tell you to make a basic plan and then go with it. It's usual for me to stick to the plan and try to come up with the perfect process and then do nothing. It's better to do something even if the results are not what you expected than do nothing
 
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