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The Primordial Cockroach War Trilogy
Episode I: The War
The king of the cockroaches made his presence known after his resurrection from inside his icy tomb. For 25 million years he laid dormant, not knowing what his fate would be. In the year 2028 however, he woke up for the first time since his burial. Using his powers the Primordial Cockroaches of old used against their enemies more than 300 million years ago, he melted the great ice continent. The other lesser cockroaches heeded the Primordial King’s call to reclaim their spot as the ultimate organism. The old Primordial King returned to the old homeland of his now deceased relatives; Florida. He did not come without a warning of his return. Using the remaining ice of the Antarctica, he moved the icy body to Florida and the state was subjected to his might wrath. Hail storms followed by hurricanes obliterated what was left of the state. Out of the small number of survivors one man that had the potential to defeat the Primordial King, began his campaign against the Primordial King. This man’s name was Arthur Dimmesdale. Luckily, the Primordial King had no knowledge of who Dimmesdale was. Though not as old as the Primordial King, Dimmesdale was still a powerful being. Dimmesdale escaped Florida, and met with the current president of the United States, Elongated Muskrat. Dimmesdale didn’t know the intensity of the power cockroaches wielded. Hastily, with Elongated Muskrat’s approval nuked the entire state of Florida. Alas, the cockroaches could withstand the intense radiation after millions of years of evolution. Elongated Muskrat announced that Dimmesdale would be the head of the new Anti-Cockroach Armed Forces (ACAF). Dimmesdale led his battalion of flamethrower wielding soldiers into Florida as a last stand for humanity. The cockroaches swarmed the army akin to locusts swarming crops in a field. The flamethrowers ignited and the battlefield turned into shades of flames and winged insects. In the midst of the battle the Primordial King unleashed a blast of radiation he absorbed after the nuke was dropped. The entire army was decimated leaving North America to the mercy of the Primordial King and his cockroach minions. After hearing the news, Elongated Muskrat started preparing a global evacuation, where all humans would board several space vessels and colonize Mars. After the global evacuation, the entire Earth would be bombarded with chlorine gas to finish off the cockroaches. Prior to the great battle of Florida, several experiments were performed to reveal what the cockroaches’ weaknesses were. Chlorine gas proved to be the most effective in terms of killing several cockroaches off quickly. Elongated Muskrat saw that Dimmesdale and the rest of ACAF, along with Dimmesdale had to be left behind.
Episode II: Return of the Primordial King
The story of the Primordial King is an old one. The Primordial King is the oldest living organism on the Earth. He is well over 300 million years old. He is the last remaining of the Primordial Cockroaches. The Primordial Cockroaches were the most powerful of their species and the most powerful organisms in the universe. They harnessed powers some would call abnormal. The Primordial Cockroaches saw all organisms on Earth as a threat and caused the extinction of most life on Earth 65 million years ago. When the Primordial Cockroaches summoned a meteorite, the impact exterminated all life on Earth, leaving only the Primordial Cockroaches alive. There was a consequence that wasn’t foreseen by the Primordials though, the majority of the Primordial Cockroaches lost their powers in the blast. The Primordial Cockroaches that were left with their powers intact, moved to what is now modern day Florida, because the moist climate fit their needs. 25 million years ago, as a last resort, the Primordial Cockroaches broke the continent of Pangea into what is now the 7 continents of the world. One of the Primordial Cockroaches was left behind in the schism of Pangea and encased in an icy tomb that became what is now Antarctica. As time went on, the remaining Primordial Cockroaches died off, and only their descendants remained. Each generation afterward would lose the memory of who they used to be, and let evolution guide the species. Even though the descendants of the Primordial Cockroaches lost their abilities, they gained new ones as they let evolution guide them. They weren’t evolved to be civilized creatures though. They evolved to become the single filthiest organism to ever exist. The new powers gained from their evolutionary journey puts fear into the hearts of many. Wielding harmful diseases that acts as a form of biological warfare. Having one of the most durable exoskeletons, encasing their inner filth. The most horrifying of all though, is the ability to withstand 9000 times more radiation that a human could ever wish to comprehend. The cockroaches were soon reminded of what power their ancestors harnessed as soon as the Antarctic ice began melting, and the one remaining Primordial Cockroach returned to claim his throne. Then and their, the Primordial King was born.
Episode III: Revelations
After the global evacuation the Primordial Cockroach claimed his throne as ruler of the universe. This would mark the first New Primordial Era. This was the first Primordial Era in 12 million years. The Primordial King used his powers to create an ethereal realm where he could reign over the universe for eternity. Instead of discarding the remnants of Dimmesdale and ACAF, the Primordial King consumed their bodies to absorb what power they had. When the Primordial King bit into Dimmesdale, it released him from his body which Dimmesdale soon realised, was holding him back from his true powers. Even though Dimmesdale’s body was destroyed, Dimmesdale’s true being was freed from its host vessel. Before Dimmesdale could realise what was happening, the Primordial King banished Dimmesdale to the prison realm, that was part of the Primordial King’s plane. The prison realm was a fiery land where rivers of water were replaced with rivers of lava. Dimmesdale used his new abilities to break a whole in the prison wall to break free. The Primordial Cockroach sensed his presence outside of the prison and soon chased him down the river to try and corner him. Dimmesdale was to agile for the Primordial Cockroach and made it up to higher ground. Dimmesdale assured the Primordial King that because Dimmesdale had the high ground, the Primordial King would lose. The Primordial King didn’t listen to Dimmesdale and leapt towards Dimmesdale. Dimmesdale sweeped the Primordial King’s lower half off, but was soon swarmed by guards and had to retreat before he could finish off the beast. Meanwhile in the physical plane Elongated Muskrat’s global evacuation procedure succeeded, except one ship didn’t make the trip to Mars. The final log entry of the ship read, “Cockroach infestation onboard, ship self destruct is activated.”. In the realm of the Primordial Cockroach Dimmesdale chases the Primordial Cockroach to his cockroach nest to finish his reign once and for all. Dimmesdale jumps down behind the Primordial Cockroach saying “Hello there.”. The Primordial Cockroach responds with “General Dimmesdale!.”.
For those that want a movie adaptation of the 1st episode youre in luck:
The Primordial Cockroach War Trilogy
Episode I: The War
The king of the cockroaches made his presence known after his resurrection from inside his icy tomb. For 25 million years he laid dormant, not knowing what his fate would be. In the year 2028 however, he woke up for the first time since his burial. Using his powers the Primordial Cockroaches of old used against their enemies more than 300 million years ago, he melted the great ice continent. The other lesser cockroaches heeded the Primordial King’s call to reclaim their spot as the ultimate organism. The old Primordial King returned to the old homeland of his now deceased relatives; Florida. He did not come without a warning of his return. Using the remaining ice of the Antarctica, he moved the icy body to Florida and the state was subjected to his might wrath. Hail storms followed by hurricanes obliterated what was left of the state. Out of the small number of survivors one man that had the potential to defeat the Primordial King, began his campaign against the Primordial King. This man’s name was Arthur Dimmesdale. Luckily, the Primordial King had no knowledge of who Dimmesdale was. Though not as old as the Primordial King, Dimmesdale was still a powerful being. Dimmesdale escaped Florida, and met with the current president of the United States, Elongated Muskrat. Dimmesdale didn’t know the intensity of the power cockroaches wielded. Hastily, with Elongated Muskrat’s approval nuked the entire state of Florida. Alas, the cockroaches could withstand the intense radiation after millions of years of evolution. Elongated Muskrat announced that Dimmesdale would be the head of the new Anti-Cockroach Armed Forces (ACAF). Dimmesdale led his battalion of flamethrower wielding soldiers into Florida as a last stand for humanity. The cockroaches swarmed the army akin to locusts swarming crops in a field. The flamethrowers ignited and the battlefield turned into shades of flames and winged insects. In the midst of the battle the Primordial King unleashed a blast of radiation he absorbed after the nuke was dropped. The entire army was decimated leaving North America to the mercy of the Primordial King and his cockroach minions. After hearing the news, Elongated Muskrat started preparing a global evacuation, where all humans would board several space vessels and colonize Mars. After the global evacuation, the entire Earth would be bombarded with chlorine gas to finish off the cockroaches. Prior to the great battle of Florida, several experiments were performed to reveal what the cockroaches’ weaknesses were. Chlorine gas proved to be the most effective in terms of killing several cockroaches off quickly. Elongated Muskrat saw that Dimmesdale and the rest of ACAF, along with Dimmesdale had to be left behind.
Episode II: Return of the Primordial King
The story of the Primordial King is an old one. The Primordial King is the oldest living organism on the Earth. He is well over 300 million years old. He is the last remaining of the Primordial Cockroaches. The Primordial Cockroaches were the most powerful of their species and the most powerful organisms in the universe. They harnessed powers some would call abnormal. The Primordial Cockroaches saw all organisms on Earth as a threat and caused the extinction of most life on Earth 65 million years ago. When the Primordial Cockroaches summoned a meteorite, the impact exterminated all life on Earth, leaving only the Primordial Cockroaches alive. There was a consequence that wasn’t foreseen by the Primordials though, the majority of the Primordial Cockroaches lost their powers in the blast. The Primordial Cockroaches that were left with their powers intact, moved to what is now modern day Florida, because the moist climate fit their needs. 25 million years ago, as a last resort, the Primordial Cockroaches broke the continent of Pangea into what is now the 7 continents of the world. One of the Primordial Cockroaches was left behind in the schism of Pangea and encased in an icy tomb that became what is now Antarctica. As time went on, the remaining Primordial Cockroaches died off, and only their descendants remained. Each generation afterward would lose the memory of who they used to be, and let evolution guide the species. Even though the descendants of the Primordial Cockroaches lost their abilities, they gained new ones as they let evolution guide them. They weren’t evolved to be civilized creatures though. They evolved to become the single filthiest organism to ever exist. The new powers gained from their evolutionary journey puts fear into the hearts of many. Wielding harmful diseases that acts as a form of biological warfare. Having one of the most durable exoskeletons, encasing their inner filth. The most horrifying of all though, is the ability to withstand 9000 times more radiation that a human could ever wish to comprehend. The cockroaches were soon reminded of what power their ancestors harnessed as soon as the Antarctic ice began melting, and the one remaining Primordial Cockroach returned to claim his throne. Then and their, the Primordial King was born.
Episode III: Revelations
After the global evacuation the Primordial Cockroach claimed his throne as ruler of the universe. This would mark the first New Primordial Era. This was the first Primordial Era in 12 million years. The Primordial King used his powers to create an ethereal realm where he could reign over the universe for eternity. Instead of discarding the remnants of Dimmesdale and ACAF, the Primordial King consumed their bodies to absorb what power they had. When the Primordial King bit into Dimmesdale, it released him from his body which Dimmesdale soon realised, was holding him back from his true powers. Even though Dimmesdale’s body was destroyed, Dimmesdale’s true being was freed from its host vessel. Before Dimmesdale could realise what was happening, the Primordial King banished Dimmesdale to the prison realm, that was part of the Primordial King’s plane. The prison realm was a fiery land where rivers of water were replaced with rivers of lava. Dimmesdale used his new abilities to break a whole in the prison wall to break free. The Primordial Cockroach sensed his presence outside of the prison and soon chased him down the river to try and corner him. Dimmesdale was to agile for the Primordial Cockroach and made it up to higher ground. Dimmesdale assured the Primordial King that because Dimmesdale had the high ground, the Primordial King would lose. The Primordial King didn’t listen to Dimmesdale and leapt towards Dimmesdale. Dimmesdale sweeped the Primordial King’s lower half off, but was soon swarmed by guards and had to retreat before he could finish off the beast. Meanwhile in the physical plane Elongated Muskrat’s global evacuation procedure succeeded, except one ship didn’t make the trip to Mars. The final log entry of the ship read, “Cockroach infestation onboard, ship self destruct is activated.”. In the realm of the Primordial Cockroach Dimmesdale chases the Primordial Cockroach to his cockroach nest to finish his reign once and for all. Dimmesdale jumps down behind the Primordial Cockroach saying “Hello there.”. The Primordial Cockroach responds with “General Dimmesdale!.”.
For those that want a movie adaptation of the 1st episode youre in luck:
