I got dumped yesterday. What lolcow thread should I binge read to feel better about myself? - Life might suck right now but at least I’m not Chris-Chan

[Cowboy Cat]

Fellow kiwis, I’m a little down. My ex blindsided me yesterday asking to end it, and I’m out of sorts to say the least.

But I figure, what better time to read through an entire thread so I can feel better about my life choices? I trust you all to know best what will do the trick.

(excuse the PL, but it’s been a rough 24 hours and our friend Venn diagram is effectively a circle so I don’t have a lot of people to talk to and figure reading through some bullshit while I’m sad might help some)

 

[KateHikes14]

None, time to be toxic and spread rumors about their infidelity with family pets and barnyard animals to ensure your formerly shared friend group becomes your friend group.

 

[fuzzyrodent85]

Vade? She made her boyfriend neck himself. The tamarlover one is also good, you may have been dumped but at least you aren't having a restraining order against you. I also recommend reading up on Katie Charm, he laughed when the kiwifarmers predicted that his roommate will kick him out and then blamed it on transphobia when it happened. Get well soon fren, I'm sure that it's their loss.

 

[The Token Ethnic]

Maybe it's a blessing in disguise. Focus on yourself and I'm sure you'll find someone else. If you use social media, make sure to post how happy you are in your new relationship as a passive aggressive way to spite your ex. I went through the same thing not too long ago, so I know how you feel. Think of it this way, better that it happened now rather than years later while you assume everything is fine with your relationship.

 

[Bad Gateway]

You got broken up with yesterday? As in the day before today? You should be slammin some ass today. That was a whole day ago, the past is the past. It's even better if you have one friend group. Find the friend that's been trying to fuck you. And then fuck them.

 

[TheBest]

I understand how you feel, I just got into a break in my relationship. Check out Lucas Werner thread to remind yourself you’re not as bad as him

 

[Cowboy Cat]

You got broken up with yesterday? As in the day before today? You should be slammin some ass today. That was a whole day ago, the past is the past. It's even better if you have one friend group. Find the friend that's been trying to fuck you. And then fuck them.

Bro I ain’t tryin to get the rona

Maybe it's a blessing in disguise. Focus on yourself and I'm sure you'll find someone else. If you use social media, make sure to post how happy you are in your new relationship as a passive aggressive way to spite your ex. I went through the same thing not too long ago, so I know how you feel. Think of it this way, better that it happened now rather than years later while you assume everything is fine with your relationship.

Unfortunately I did think everything was fine, but it is what it is. I am a petty bitch at heart tho tbh so...this is real appealing lol

Vade? She made her boyfriend neck himself. The tamarlover one is also good, you may have been dumped but at least you aren't having a restraining order against you. I also recommend reading up on Katie Charm, he laughed when the kiwifarmers predicted that his roommate will kick him out and then blamed it on transphobia when it happened. Get well soon fren, I'm sure that it's their loss.

Two pages into vade and this is already proper batshit, thank you

 

[Bad Gateway]

Bro I ain’t tryin to get the rona

Unfortunately I did think everything was fine, but it is what it is. I am a petty bitch at heart tho tbh so...this is real appealing lol

Two pages into vade and this is already proper batshit, thank you

SLAM SOME ASS

 

[AMERICA]

meanwhile on your ex's FB:

 

[stares at error messages]

IF YOU ARE A MAN
You should join MIA. It's really easy. All you do is stay home play video games and refuse to give SCUM your GDP. Reads like you'll come out ahead in all this, if you join.
ELSE
You will be fulfilled by putting all your energy into your job or career.

 

[Furret]

Benjamin Hyde. That guy gets laid so little that he's developed an obsession with drawings of naked children.

 

[BIG BILL HELL'S]

The Richard "Lowtax" Kyanka thread, and the accompanying divorce thread. (There's also the general Something Awful thread if you're reaaaally bored.)

 

[Cowboy Cat]

IF YOU ARE A MAN
You should join MIA. It's really easy. All you do is stay home play video games and refuse to give SCUM your GDP. Reads like you'll come out ahead in all this, if you join.
ELSE
You will be fulfilled by putting all your energy into your job or career.

No idea what MIA is but hell yeah dude

 

[Bad Gateway]

Did you fuck yet?

 

[Vexillology]

Take your mind off relationships - nothing turns you off to the idea of touching humans like good ol' Kevin

 

[BerriesArnold]

Chantal's thread. If there's ever a person out there that will help you feel better about your life choices, it's her. At least you're not Peetz.

 

[Tookie]

Russell Greer. Because at least you're not him.

 

[Massa's Little Buckie]

Amy's thread is full of funny shit.

 

[nigger of the north]

Fuck that gay shit. Get on OLD, find some loose whores, pipe your way to heartbreak healing.

Unless you're a beta fag who can't land strange, in which case I'd recommend Chris for life guidance general.

 

[Penis Drager]

This might cheer you up:
Not much beats a thread where the OP becomes the cow.