I murdered Seth Rich AMA - I murdered him in real life

H

HG 400

Guest
kiwifarms.net
It was early July in 2016 and I got a call from Hillary. "Hey stallion", she said "I heard this guy Seth Rich has been totally dragging me behind my back to Putin and Assange or whatever. Can you check with your hardcore GRU contacts if it's true because if it's true I'll have to pay you to murder him in real life". It wasn't true but I was running low on meat pie and cigarette money so after I played a couple rounds of Pokemon I called her back and told her that Putin said that Seth Rich was totally busting shade on her. Also she calls me stallion because of a sex thing, it's not a code-name or anything.

Anyways, after I confirmed that Seth was working for the russians she offered me $80 to whack him, so I went out and waited a block from his apartment. I called him up on my mobile telephone and asked him if he wanted to meet me at the Starbucks to talk about how much we both loved Hillary Clinton and would never betray her. When he was halfway there I stepped out from the shadows behind him and shot him a whole bunch of times with my pistol in real life. Then I ran off and collected my $80 and I spent most of it on cigarettes and also some meat pies.

AMA.
 
A

AP 297

Guest
kiwifarms.net
What type of gun did you use?

Do you remember what Seth was wearing when you shot him?

Do you have any discernable birthmarks or scars that could possibly be used to identify you?

Is their anyone who can corroborate your exact whereabouts on July 10, 2016.
 
H

HG 400

Guest
kiwifarms.net
What type of gun did you use?

It was the same pistol I used to kill Mary Mohane with. It's a .40 revolver made by some Russian manufacturer that just makes handguns for export, and I don't remember how to pronounce the name.

Do you remember what Seth was wearing when you shot him?

Not really, clothes and stuff. He was dressed kinda like a faggot but I'm not a faggot so I don't know what the type of clothes are called exactly. I mostly only wear tracksuits because they're really comfortable and don't slow you down when you're running away from murders.

Do you have any discernable birthmarks or scars that could possibly be used to identify you?

No.

Is their anyone who can corroborate your exact whereabouts on July 10, 2016.

I met up with Hillary Clinton later and she paid me the $80 so you could ask her I guess.

Can you mail me a body part? It doesn't have to be one of his.

Sure, what's your address?

how was the rigorous sex with his corpse

I didn't have any time for that.

And you had corpse sex without inviting me?

Yes. (unrelated incident)
 
A

AP 297

Guest
kiwifarms.net
It was the same pistol I used to kill Mary Mohane with. It's a .40 revolver made by some Russian manufacturer that just makes handguns for export, and I don't remember how to pronounce the name.



Not really, clothes and stuff. He was dressed kinda like a faggot but I'm not a faggot so I don't know what the type of clothes are called exactly. I mostly only wear tracksuits because they're really comfortable and don't slow you down when you're running away from murders.



No.



I met up with Hillary Clinton later and she paid me the $80 so you could ask her I guess.



Sure, what's your address?



I didn't have any time for that.



Yes. (unrelated incident)

Actually the part with the sex with the corpse does check out wow

Congratulations for answering all these questions so accurately, you are now the winner of a tax free $100,000 Wal-Mart gift certificate redeemable at:

300 Indiana Ave NW
Washington, DC 20001

Come in and they will take care of you.
 
H

HG 400

Guest
kiwifarms.net
What did it sound like when Seth Rich came?

Lonely footsteps on the impassive pavement, steadily encroaching towards me and towards the edge of his own mortal coil, almost drowned out by my heightened pre-murder breathing.

wow this just got a lot more complicated.

Okay, clearly you are the actual killer and you work for DC PD...

Fucking Clintonites are infested in every level of government :mad:

Keep it up I could use another eighty dollars.
 

Henry Wyatt

Only ironically racist
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
UH.... g-guys?!
bLdF8jt.jpg
 

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