Incel and Lonely Men Debate thread - Defend men giving up or tell them otherwise

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ToroidalBoat

Token Hispanic Friend
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Reading the end of "My Twisted World" by ER can be a good way to counter any misanthropic perspective one may have picked up from the crazy circus of 2020 - by seeing how hateful ER got before he "went ER".

I mean yeah this world sucks, but it's not quite the dark hell ER seems to have projected onto it.
 

UselessPieceOfShit

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I think that the problem of incels comes from the same root as the problem of our younger generations being disappointed in life in general. We are constantly told from childhood how our life will be awesome and colorful, that you can achieve anything if you try hard enough. Obviously, life doesn't work like that. You don't get shit because you're just a very nice and unique person. Something something capitalism is bad. Incels don't get the memo. Just because you're actually a nice guy with deep knowledge of anime about lolis and wear a charming fedora, women would not like you. They think that they deserve a woman, but no one desrves anything. You don't get handouts and you surely dont get sex just because you think you are entitled to it. But incels are too narcissistic to understand that.
 

Johan Hulth

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Depends on what you mean by “success”. I know plenty of well adjusted men with good jobs (who aren’t spergs) and they still have lots of trouble finding good women.
This is why the self-improvement schtick is largely bollocks. The guys I've known who slayed the most pussy were part-time tattoo artists, weed dealers and badly paid salesmen. Men who have children they never see and coke habits. Men who've never left the country and probably earn under the average. Yea they weren't obese or stinky, but they weren't all 6'4 and jacked either. They were just cheeky lads.

I'm sure a certain percentage of incels are the unwashed, unemployed bronies of lolcowdom, but that's obviously rare. The reality I've observed is mostly straight laced men completely befuddled by just how cheeky and cocky you have to be to get your dick wet, or even just a date. Not least because it contradicts everything they were told about being a good boy. It becomes a vicious circle as the tension and stress of finding someone increasingly takes over from any semblance of fun, if it was ever there at all.

Incels are maladapted and socially inept, as a result they suffer from various mental disorders that successfully prevent them from getting laid. Everything else, be it sexuality, personal politics, SoCiEtY, looks, so on, is at best a secondary issue and more likely a copout.
Is it a mental disorder to not know how to do something very well? Especially when the only way to learn is from sleazy sex addicts looking to make a quick buck? PUAs have been routinely cancelled by polite society, so any decent, functional man can't even turn to that. As previously cited criminality is correlated with sexual success, which is surely maladaptive for SoCiEtY. Obviously bitterness builds to unhealthy levels in incels, hence the handful going postal we've seen in the news. But for every one of those incel "terrorists" there will be thousands of violent career criminals who have no problem getting laid.

Incels are just dudes who didn't get the memo that crushing gender roles for being toxic social constructs doesn't apply when it's sexy time. Certainly contemporary gendered presentation is obvious to anyone with eyes: Dudes have never lifted more and women have never worn more make-up. But it's men's gendered behaviour in private that is the real spark to any and all heterosexual encounters, and that is quietly under the radar enough to leave an unfortunate proportion of men clueless.
 

Dreamer

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Is it a mental disorder to not know how to do something very well?
No, that's a consequence of their upbringing or lack of thereof. Mental disorders come in a bit later and prevent them from catching up. This is how they become stuck. If you get an inferiority complex you won't become a social butterfly without resolving it first.
Hence, its the first thing to work on, you can't change your past but you may be able to change your future.
[strange tangent about criminality and bad boys]
Its almost as if problems that incels face don't translate 1to1 to the rest of the society, which just so happens to include criminals.
Besides that, as funny as it sounds criminality demands some semblance of social skills, meanwhile sitting in your room all day doesn't.
All this >women only like bad boys is in part both a funny cope where incels think anyone with social skills is scum, and even funnier an unfortunate result of evolutionary biology (turns out that women seem to gravitate toward "stronger" men for making babies with, but then prefer nurturing said babies with men who are *more similar to them*. Interpret that as you see fit)

Before you get confused, yes, something can (partially in this case) be true and at the same time still be a cope excuse.
Just because you're not 100% women's 'type' doesn't mean you can't make it, just because you're developmentally stunted doesn't mean you can't catch up, so on.
This is what incels need to get through their thick skulls through therapy, instead of finding more and more excuses for why they juuuust caaaaaant, booooo hooooooo and bitching about every obstacle on the way.

Yes, the situation for men isn't good, yes its getting worse, everything is always getting worse.
Doesn't give you a license to lay down and die.
 

Astute Observation

<-- Post Merge Newfag
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In the first job I worked there was this sneedly girl that thought we were dating because once in passing she said "hi" and I responded with "good morning." She was short, chunky, had bad skin and lacked the social skills to form a complete sentence when speaking to a guy she liked.

I don't know if its right to call her a "femcel" since I could easily imagine somebody like Chris Chan dating her if given the chance. I think that eventually girls like this just hit rock bottom with their standards and date an IP2-tier crackhead-andy or become coal burners.
 

Johan Hulth

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Yes, the situation for men isn't good, yes its getting worse, everything is always getting worse.
Kind of doomy dude. Learning flirting shouldn't have to be some massive therapy session to discuss the Jungian Jordan Peterson twaddle about men finding their inner wolf shadow. Just good natured advice to young men about the relative necessity of flirting would be enough, not everyone's got an older brother type. Maybe it's somewhere buried in all the zoomer genderspecial labelling now? I do think some of that allows young people a more explicit code of attraction, cringe as it is.
 

Knight of the Rope

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Just good natured advice to young men about the relative necessity of flirting would be enough
It always bewilders me how incels and other socially-retarded degenerates get to their 20s and 30s without even picking this basic stuff up through osmosis though. Flirting and banter is how every aspect of the world works, period. Not even just for intimate relationships. I mean, how do they make friends? How do they mingle in social situations? How do they get jobs/raises/professional development opportunities?
 

Dreamer

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Learning flirting shouldn't have to be some massive therapy session
And yet, to some it is.
On the bright since those societal problems are popping up because we have already dealt with more basic material ones. In the past you didn't have incels (at least to such a degree) because there weren't conditions for them to exist in, everyone had to work, everyone had to get married to survive.

What were experiencing right now is a crysis of meaning, the big question of "what now?" that you can ask yourself only after you fulfilled your basic needs. In this way, its natural.
It always bewilders me how incels and other socially-exceptional degenerates get to their 20s and 30s without even picking this basic stuff up through osmosis though.
They didn't pick it up because they never had to, until it was "too late". They spent their childhood in front of a screen and now they dnt know how to talk to people face to face. Its going to be happening more and more.
 

Zero Day Defense

"Now come, Samurai. Put on a good show."
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Incels don't get the memo.
The opposite is true. They got the memo, and upon receiving the memo they realize that they were duped by society at large about what they needed to do and what they needed to be in order to find intimate companionship, as well as about the base quality of what (who) they were competing for.

They don't act and change upon this realization, however. They're entrenched into the effeminate mindset where they believe they can do the bare minimum and they ought to be able to find intimacy with the male equivalent of the mythical Batman-esque chimera many women dupe themselves into believing they deserve, even as they facially no longer believe it. They retreat into despair and/or degeneracy, but they never seek to improve themselves because they convince themselves that there's no point.

Because they can't stop thinking that the point of self-improvement is to peacock in order to attract women. Because they believe their worth is based on whether they put their penis in a woman, or whether a woman acknowledges them.

Because they still worship women as much as they did prior to getting the memo.
 

Shchors

Chop your balls off -C.G Jung
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Incels are maladapted and socially inept, as a result they suffer from various mental disorders that successfully prevent them from getting laid. Everything else, be it sexuality, personal politics, SoCiEtY, looks, so on, is at best a secondary issue and more likely a copout.
Idk man.We're in a site literally dedicated to making fun of "people who are maladapted and suffers from various mental disorders" a.k.a lolcows.
How many lolcows do you know that do get laid? I can count three from my head,including Lowtax,Jim Sterling,and DSP.If those people can get laid despite having something wrong with their head and generally depraved intersocial relationships i don't know how crazy you need to be to be an incel
 

Dreamer

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Idk man.We're in a site literally dedicated to making fun of "people who are maladapted and suffers from various mental disorders" a.k.a lolcows.
How many lolcows do you know that do get laid? I can count three from my head,including Lowtax,Jim Sterling,and DSP.If those people can get laid despite having something wrong with their head and generally depraved intersocial relationships i don't know how crazy you need to be to be an incel
You just need to be a certain kind of crazy. Because not every mental disorder is the same.
You're essentially equating a guy with a broken leg, to a guy with a broken arm; only one of them is going to have issues with running.
 

Ingmar Aspergman

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Idk man.We're in a site literally dedicated to making fun of "people who are maladapted and suffers from various mental disorders" a.k.a lolcows.
How many lolcows do you know that do get laid? I can count three from my head,including Lowtax,Jim Sterling,and DSP.If those people can get laid despite having something wrong with their head and generally depraved intersocial relationships i don't know how crazy you need to be to be an incel

You can get laid but at what cost
 

Cyclonus

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Jan 15, 2020
Prostitutes won't fix lack of romance.
You've obviously never heard of the most expensive service professional escorts provide. Which is also the most popular, which is why it's so expensive. It's called the GFE. What does that stand for? The girlfriend experience. There are men who are paying women considerable sums of money to go on dinner dates with them, take romantic walks while holding hands and whisper sweet nothings in their ear. God, that is so fucking depressing.
 

Ser Prize

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Nov 20, 2019
You've obviously never heard of the most expensive service professional escorts provide. Which is also the most popular, which is why it's so expensive. It's called the GFE. What does that stand for? The girlfriend experience. There are men who are paying women considerable sums of money to go on dinner dates with them, take romantic walks while holding hands and whisper sweet nothings in their ear. God, that is so fucking depressing.
I dunno, maybe that's enough for some. But to me it'd all ring hollow, because you know it's not real.

How profoundly fucked is our society when the most common fantasy of many men is to be loved and appreciated?
 

Never Scored

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How profoundly fucked is our society when the most common fantasy of many men is to be loved and appreciated?
I don't know if it's fair to say it's the most common fantasy men have, just that it's the most common fantasy of men who for whatever reason have to pay a woman to sleep with them.
 

Bad Gateway

[shitposting angrily]
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You've obviously never heard of the most expensive service professional escorts provide. Which is also the most popular, which is why it's so expensive. It's called the GFE. What does that stand for? The girlfriend experience. There are men who are paying women considerable sums of money to go on dinner dates with them, take romantic walks while holding hands and whisper sweet nothings in their ear. God, that is so fucking depressing.
This poster is under 17 years of age.