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Zodiax

Probably a government plant
True & Honest Fan
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@Marvin's Canadian equivalent is named Melvin. That is just too perfect.


A man in a banana suit was a Toronto Marathon frontrunner
Melvin Nyairo ran the world record for the fastest half-marathon dressed as a fruit

If you were watching the live stream or cheering on course on Sunday morning, you would’ve noticed that there was a man in a banana suit running with the lead Canadian women at the Scotiabank Toronto Waterfront Marathon.

Banana Man, as he was called by spectators, was wearing Nike Next%’s and moving at a very impressive clip (with or without a banana suit). The Banana Man’s name is Melvin Nyairo of the US and he finished in 1:15:35, setting the unofficial world record for fastest half-marathon dressed as a fruit.
 

W00K #17

Boy Man God Shiiiit
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Police: Naked man found in Winchester bathroom following burglary complaint
By WKYT News Staff | Posted: Mon 10:34 AM, Oct 21, 2019 | Updated: Mon 2:04 PM, Oct 21, 2019

WINCHESTER, Ky. (WKYT) - Winchester police arrested a man after officers say they found him naked in a stranger's home.


Carlos Cruz Dominguez (Photo: Clark County Detention Center)
Officers were called to Stamper Drive after receiving a breaking and entering complaint. A person in the home was standing outside when police arrived, and she said the suspect was inside her bathroom.

Officers say they opened the door to the bathroom and found 26-year-old Carlos Cruz Dominguez nude. He refused to put on his clothes.

The victim told police her son came to her screaming and crying about the man entering through the back door. She tried to lock Dominguez in the garage, but he was able to push the door back open and get to the bathroom.

Dominguez was charged with burglary and indecent exposure. He was placed in the Clark County Detention Center where he is being held without bond.
 

LordofTendons

OW MAI LAIG
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Local California CBS reporter fired after jumping on, damaging cars during live news segment

A local CBS reporter in California was apparently fired after he — during a live news segment — climbed atop classic, privately-owned cars, even seemingly damaging one of them in the process.

Angel Cardenas, a correspondent with KMAX-TV's "Good Morning Sacramento," was on air Sunday at the Sacramento International Auto Show, a weekend-long event at Cal Expo that was about to begin its final day.

Someone who caught the segment on air, Adam Copeland, posted a clip of it to Facebook, as he has "never seen such a disregard to someone else's vehicle."

Cardenas playfully tells viewers "the only person out here is a media coordinator, [the event] doesn't start until later in the day… no one is out here to tell me which car I can't go in, cause some of these are off-limits, so I'm just gonna live on the wild side." He then gets on top of a yellow Ford Thunderbird and laying on his side, posing on the car.

"I feel like a kid in a candy store without the owners because you can do anything," Cardenas says. He then moves on to another car, a pink Thunderbird, and opens the driver's side door — which dings into another vehicle sitting next to it.

He briefly takes a look at the possible damage, and then proceeds to get inside the car and quips that "nobody's looking," before directing the cameraman to zoom in on the spot where the door hit the neighboring vehicle.

Cardenas later crosses through a barrier around a Ford Explorer and hops on top of the hood of the car.

"I would get off that now," one of the two on-air hosts tells Cardenas from the studio. He gets off moments later, saying someone in the auto show told him to.

The following day, the auto show's Facebook page was updated with a message about the incident. According to the post, the auto show's producer reached out to the producer of the general manager of the CBS affiliate about the "astonishingly awful incident" and was told Cardenas was immediately fired following the segment, as also noted by the Time Meets Road blog.

The news station, which declined Fox News' request for comment, "expressed their sincerest apologies for the incident," the post read.

https://www.facebook.com/adam.h.copeland.7/videos/10206423232377533/

https://www.facebook.com/SacAutoShow/posts/10157589245952264
 

keyboredsm4shthe2nd

CRUSH YOUR ENEMIES! GRIND THEIR BONES INTO DIRT!
kiwifarms.net

Local California CBS reporter fired after jumping on, damaging cars during live news segment

A local CBS reporter in California was apparently fired after he — during a live news segment — climbed atop classic, privately-owned cars, even seemingly damaging one of them in the process.

Angel Cardenas, a correspondent with KMAX-TV's "Good Morning Sacramento," was on air Sunday at the Sacramento International Auto Show, a weekend-long event at Cal Expo that was about to begin its final day.

Someone who caught the segment on air, Adam Copeland, posted a clip of it to Facebook, as he has "never seen such a disregard to someone else's vehicle."

Cardenas playfully tells viewers "the only person out here is a media coordinator, [the event] doesn't start until later in the day… no one is out here to tell me which car I can't go in, cause some of these are off-limits, so I'm just gonna live on the wild side." He then gets on top of a yellow Ford Thunderbird and laying on his side, posing on the car.

"I feel like a kid in a candy store without the owners because you can do anything," Cardenas says. He then moves on to another car, a pink Thunderbird, and opens the driver's side door — which dings into another vehicle sitting next to it.

He briefly takes a look at the possible damage, and then proceeds to get inside the car and quips that "nobody's looking," before directing the cameraman to zoom in on the spot where the door hit the neighboring vehicle.

Cardenas later crosses through a barrier around a Ford Explorer and hops on top of the hood of the car.

"I would get off that now," one of the two on-air hosts tells Cardenas from the studio. He gets off moments later, saying someone in the auto show told him to.

The following day, the auto show's Facebook page was updated with a message about the incident. According to the post, the auto show's producer reached out to the producer of the general manager of the CBS affiliate about the "astonishingly awful incident" and was told Cardenas was immediately fired following the segment, as also noted by the Time Meets Road blog.

The news station, which declined Fox News' request for comment, "expressed their sincerest apologies for the incident," the post read.

https://www.facebook.com/adam.h.copeland.7/videos/10206423232377533/

https://www.facebook.com/SacAutoShow/posts/10157589245952264
How did this fucking idiot pass kindergarten where they teach you "don't touch shit that isn't yours"
Oh wait, it's commiefornia, there's no mine only ours.
eta this motherfucker doesn't know just how lucky he is not to have tooth fragments and blood smeared all over the nearest curb.
 

AnOminous

I'm not mad at anyone, honest.
True & Honest Fan
Retired Staff
kiwifarms.net
How did this fucking idiot pass kindergarten where they teach you "don't touch shit that isn't yours"
Oh wait, it's commiefornia, there's no mine only ours.
eta this motherfucker doesn't know just how lucky he is not to have tooth fragments and blood smeared all over the nearest curb.
They probably didn't want blood on their paint jobs or painstakingly restored upholstery.
 
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Dracula's Spirit Animal

One time, I accidentally ate a bunch of nails
kiwifarms.net

Local California CBS reporter fired after jumping on, damaging cars during live news segment

A local CBS reporter in California was apparently fired after he — during a live news segment — climbed atop classic, privately-owned cars, even seemingly damaging one of them in the process.

Angel Cardenas, a correspondent with KMAX-TV's "Good Morning Sacramento," was on air Sunday at the Sacramento International Auto Show, a weekend-long event at Cal Expo that was about to begin its final day.

Someone who caught the segment on air, Adam Copeland, posted a clip of it to Facebook, as he has "never seen such a disregard to someone else's vehicle."

Cardenas playfully tells viewers "the only person out here is a media coordinator, [the event] doesn't start until later in the day… no one is out here to tell me which car I can't go in, cause some of these are off-limits, so I'm just gonna live on the wild side." He then gets on top of a yellow Ford Thunderbird and laying on his side, posing on the car.

"I feel like a kid in a candy store without the owners because you can do anything," Cardenas says. He then moves on to another car, a pink Thunderbird, and opens the driver's side door — which dings into another vehicle sitting next to it.

He briefly takes a look at the possible damage, and then proceeds to get inside the car and quips that "nobody's looking," before directing the cameraman to zoom in on the spot where the door hit the neighboring vehicle.

Cardenas later crosses through a barrier around a Ford Explorer and hops on top of the hood of the car.

"I would get off that now," one of the two on-air hosts tells Cardenas from the studio. He gets off moments later, saying someone in the auto show told him to.

The following day, the auto show's Facebook page was updated with a message about the incident. According to the post, the auto show's producer reached out to the producer of the general manager of the CBS affiliate about the "astonishingly awful incident" and was told Cardenas was immediately fired following the segment, as also noted by the Time Meets Road blog.

The news station, which declined Fox News' request for comment, "expressed their sincerest apologies for the incident," the post read.

https://www.facebook.com/adam.h.copeland.7/videos/10206423232377533/

https://www.facebook.com/SacAutoShow/posts/10157589245952264
I'm not sure what I find more offensive... this guy's treatment of classic cars, or that a Ford Explorer was at a car show.
 

Botchy Galoop

Get Stuffed.
kiwifarms.net
https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-50150070

The bodies of 39 people have been found in a lorry container in Essex.

Police were called by the ambulance service shortly before 01:40 BST after the discovery at Waterglade Industrial Park in Eastern Avenue, Grays.

The lorry driver, a 25-year-old man from Northern Ireland, has been arrested on suspicion of murder.

Early indications are that 38 adults and one teenager have died, Essex Police said.

The force said the lorry came from Bulgaria and entered the country via Holyhead on Saturday.

Ch Supt Andrew Mariner said officers were trying to indentify victims but anticipated a "lengthy process".

"We have arrested the lorry driver in connection with the incident, who remains in police custody as our inquiries continue," he said.

A cordon has been put in place and the Waterglade Industrial Park is closed off.
 

theshep

True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-50150070

The bodies of 39 people have been found in a lorry container in Essex.

Police were called by the ambulance service shortly before 01:40 BST after the discovery at Waterglade Industrial Park in Eastern Avenue, Grays.

The lorry driver, a 25-year-old man from Northern Ireland, has been arrested on suspicion of murder.

Early indications are that 38 adults and one teenager have died, Essex Police said.

The force said the lorry came from Bulgaria and entered the country via Holyhead on Saturday.

Ch Supt Andrew Mariner said officers were trying to indentify victims but anticipated a "lengthy process".

"We have arrested the lorry driver in connection with the incident, who remains in police custody as our inquiries continue," he said.

A cordon has been put in place and the Waterglade Industrial Park is closed off.
When I saw the breaking news banner, my first thought was 'I wonder if they were trying to get in or get out of the UK'.

I'm going to hell.
 

keyboredsm4shthe2nd

CRUSH YOUR ENEMIES! GRIND THEIR BONES INTO DIRT!
kiwifarms.net
https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-50150070

The bodies of 39 people have been found in a lorry container in Essex.

Police were called by the ambulance service shortly before 01:40 BST after the discovery at Waterglade Industrial Park in Eastern Avenue, Grays.

The lorry driver, a 25-year-old man from Northern Ireland, has been arrested on suspicion of murder.

Early indications are that 38 adults and one teenager have died, Essex Police said.

The force said the lorry came from Bulgaria and entered the country via Holyhead on Saturday.

Ch Supt Andrew Mariner said officers were trying to indentify victims but anticipated a "lengthy process".

"We have arrested the lorry driver in connection with the incident, who remains in police custody as our inquiries continue," he said.

A cordon has been put in place and the Waterglade Industrial Park is closed off.
Meanwhile as an amerifat I immediately assume this is the equivalent of trying to smuggle mexicans across the border in an unmarked van. They were alive when they got in there.
 
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LordofTendons

OW MAI LAIG
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Cops: Man Had Sex With Stuffed Animals At Target
Assault victims included Olaf from animated Disney movie "Frozen"

OCTOBER 23--A Florida Man yesterday sexually assaulted a pair of “large stuffed animal toys” inside a Target store, according to police who arrested the fiend on a criminal mischief charge.

As detailed in a criminal complaint, Cody Christopher Meader, 20, entered the retailer around 2 PM Tuesday and approached a display of merchandise featuring characters from the Disney film “Frozen.”

Meader, seen at right, selected a “large Olaf stuffed animal” and proceeded to place it on the floor of the Target in Pinellas Park. He then began to “dry hump” the cinematic snowman “until he ejaculated on the merchandise,” a cop reported.

Meader returned the soiled Olaf back to the display before entering the toy department, where he “selected a large unicorn stuffed animal and began to ‘dry hump’ this item.”

After consorting with the stuffed animals, Meader, who lives in St. Petersburg, was detained while still inside the store. After being read his rights, Meader reportedly “admitted to doing ‘stupid stuff’ and admitted that he had ‘nutted’ on the Olaf stuffed animal.”

The stuffed items, cops say, were “removed from the store floor” and destroyed.

According to the complaint, Meader’s father told police that “def has a history of this type of behavior.” Court records, however, list no prior criminal cases against Meader.

Charged with criminal mischief, Meader was booked into the county jail on the misdemeanor count. He was released from custody last night after posting $150 bond.
 

Dracula's Spirit Animal

One time, I accidentally ate a bunch of nails
kiwifarms.net

Cops: Man Had Sex With Stuffed Animals At Target
Assault victims included Olaf from animated Disney movie "Frozen"

OCTOBER 23--A Florida Man yesterday sexually assaulted a pair of “large stuffed animal toys” inside a Target store, according to police who arrested the fiend on a criminal mischief charge.

As detailed in a criminal complaint, Cody Christopher Meader, 20, entered the retailer around 2 PM Tuesday and approached a display of merchandise featuring characters from the Disney film “Frozen.”

Meader, seen at right, selected a “large Olaf stuffed animal” and proceeded to place it on the floor of the Target in Pinellas Park. He then began to “dry hump” the cinematic snowman “until he ejaculated on the merchandise,” a cop reported.

Meader returned the soiled Olaf back to the display before entering the toy department, where he “selected a large unicorn stuffed animal and began to ‘dry hump’ this item.”

After consorting with the stuffed animals, Meader, who lives in St. Petersburg, was detained while still inside the store. After being read his rights, Meader reportedly “admitted to doing ‘stupid stuff’ and admitted that he had ‘nutted’ on the Olaf stuffed animal.”

The stuffed items, cops say, were “removed from the store floor” and destroyed.

According to the complaint, Meader’s father told police that “def has a history of this type of behavior.” Court records, however, list no prior criminal cases against Meader.

Charged with criminal mischief, Meader was booked into the county jail on the misdemeanor count. He was released from custody last night after posting $150 bond.
Ahhhh, Florida Man.... Is there anything you CAN'T do?
 
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Kill all whales

Yang wen li. My conquest is the sea of the stars
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net

Cody Meader was arrested for ‘dry humping’ and ‘ejaculating’ on an Olaf stuffed animal at a department store. (Picture: Pinellas County Sheriff’s Office) A shopper lifted an Olaf the snowman soft toy off the shelf of a Target supermarket then had sex with it, police say. Cody Meader, 20, was arrested and charged with criminal mischief for sexually assaulting ‘large stuffed animal toys’ inside the store in Pinellas County, Florida on Tuesday. After he was read his rights, Meader admitted to doing ‘stupid stuff’ and confessed that he had ‘nutted’ on the Olaf stuffed animal. Police said Meader entered the store and took a ‘large Olaf stuffed animal’ from a display dedicated to the smash hit 2013 Disney movie, whose sequel is released next month. He then reportedly placed it on the floor and began to ‘dry hump’ the toy ‘until he ejaculated onto the merchandise.’ Afterwards, he placed the stuffed toy back on the Frozen display – then set his sights on a large stuffed unicorn, which he began to ‘dry hump’ as well, authorities wrote in an arrest affidavit obtained by the Smoking Gun. The obscene incident occurred at a Target store in Pinellas Park, Florida. (Picture: Google Maps) Meader was detained in the store, with the animals he is accused of soiling removed from its shelves. The suspect’s dad, who was not at the store, told police that his son has ‘a history of this type of behavior.’ There are no previous charges listed on Meader’s criminal record related, or unrelated, to the sexual abuse of stuffed animals. He has been charged with misdemeanor criminal mischief and was booked into the Pinellas County Jail. Meader was later released after posting $150 bond. Police wrote that Meader did not appear to be under the influence of drugs or alcohol at the time of his alleged sexual assault on the children’s toys.
 
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keyboredsm4shthe2nd

CRUSH YOUR ENEMIES! GRIND THEIR BONES INTO DIRT!
kiwifarms.net

Cody Meader was arrested for ‘dry humping’ and ‘ejaculating’ on an Olaf stuffed animal at a department store. (Picture: Pinellas County Sheriff’s Office) A shopper lifted an Olaf the snowman soft toy off the shelf of a Target supermarket then had sex with it, police say. Cody Meader, 20, was arrested and charged with criminal mischief for sexually assaulting ‘large stuffed animal toys’ inside the store in Pinellas County, Florida on Tuesday. After he was read his rights, Meader admitted to doing ‘stupid stuff’ and confessed that he had ‘nutted’ on the Olaf stuffed animal. Police said Meader entered the store and took a ‘large Olaf stuffed animal’ from a display dedicated to the smash hit 2013 Disney movie, whose sequel is released next month. He then reportedly placed it on the floor and began to ‘dry hump’ the toy ‘until he ejaculated onto the merchandise.’ Afterwards, he placed the stuffed toy back on the Frozen display – then set his sights on a large stuffed unicorn, which he began to ‘dry hump’ as well, authorities wrote in an arrest affidavit obtained by the Smoking Gun. The obscene incident occurred at a Target store in Pinellas Park, Florida. (Picture: Google Maps) Meader was detained in the store, with the animals he is accused of soiling removed from its shelves. The suspect’s dad, who was not at the store, told police that his son has ‘a history of this type of behavior.’ There are no previous charges listed on Meader’s criminal record related, or unrelated, to the sexual abuse of stuffed animals. He has been charged with misdemeanor criminal mischief and was booked into the Pinellas County Jail. Meader was later released after posting $150 bond. Police wrote that Meader did not appear to be under the influence of drugs or alcohol at the time of his alleged sexual assault on the children’s toys.
thread when
 
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CWCissey

Charming Man
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net

Cody Meader was arrested for ‘dry humping’ and ‘ejaculating’ on an Olaf stuffed animal at a department store. (Picture: Pinellas County Sheriff’s Office) A shopper lifted an Olaf the snowman soft toy off the shelf of a Target supermarket then had sex with it, police say. Cody Meader, 20, was arrested and charged with criminal mischief for sexually assaulting ‘large stuffed animal toys’ inside the store in Pinellas County, Florida on Tuesday. After he was read his rights, Meader admitted to doing ‘stupid stuff’ and confessed that he had ‘nutted’ on the Olaf stuffed animal. Police said Meader entered the store and took a ‘large Olaf stuffed animal’ from a display dedicated to the smash hit 2013 Disney movie, whose sequel is released next month. He then reportedly placed it on the floor and began to ‘dry hump’ the toy ‘until he ejaculated onto the merchandise.’ Afterwards, he placed the stuffed toy back on the Frozen display – then set his sights on a large stuffed unicorn, which he began to ‘dry hump’ as well, authorities wrote in an arrest affidavit obtained by the Smoking Gun. The obscene incident occurred at a Target store in Pinellas Park, Florida. (Picture: Google Maps) Meader was detained in the store, with the animals he is accused of soiling removed from its shelves. The suspect’s dad, who was not at the store, told police that his son has ‘a history of this type of behavior.’ There are no previous charges listed on Meader’s criminal record related, or unrelated, to the sexual abuse of stuffed animals. He has been charged with misdemeanor criminal mischief and was booked into the Pinellas County Jail. Meader was later released after posting $150 bond. Police wrote that Meader did not appear to be under the influence of drugs or alcohol at the time of his alleged sexual assault on the children’s toys.
Appropriate gif is appropriate

 
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