Is grooming ever alright? - Can grooming turn into a healthy relationship?

[KateHikes14]

No. Grooming has a terrible connotation because it is a term for a bad dynamic. If it's a good dynamic, it's not grooming, it's something else. I don't know why people are trying to extend the definition of grooming to include both good and bad situations, that seems to me to be a very slippery slope.

Because you have the timeline backwards, it's always been for both positive and negative relationships, but has increasingly been used only to describe negative or harmful relationships.
Ever helped a younger relative become a better person despite not being their parent? Congratulations, you groomed them, and they are better for it.

 

[Spooky Bones]

Because you have the timeline backwards, it's always been for both positive and negative relationships, but has increasingly been used only to describe negative or harmful relationships.
Ever helped a younger relative become a better person despite not being their parent? Congratulations, you groomed them, and they are better for it.

I don't think "grooming" has ever been used positively in a sexual context though which is what we're talking about. Yeah you might say "groomed your kid to go to Harvard" or something but that's pretty much a different use of the world entirely.

 

[Big Ruski]

Your brain is still in it's adolescent phase until 25. Its the reason why college is jokingly referred to as "Daycare for young adults" because your still a retarded child. I've never met anyone in their early 20's who knew what they wanted to do, and if they did, they were lying. Just like your friend.

A good example is Leanna. Leanna was groomed by DSP (who was 29-30) when she was 18 and maybe younger but you saw her starting to "wake up" as she neared her mid 20's and she became more and more independent much to the displeasure of Phil. So no, I don't believe grooming minors is ever alright, even grooming people in their early 20's.

Not even sexual either, We have a whole new generation of depressed kids and young adults because old fucks want to embed their gay radical theories and ideologies on them. This is heighten even more due to how quickly information is shared and a rapid number of echo chambers that serve to reinforce those gay ideas. If millennials were the guinea pigs of this "experiment" then Gen Z are the official result of that.

 

[Spooky Bones]

Not even sexual either, We have a whole new generation of depressed kids and young adults because old fucks want to embed their gay radical theories and ideologies on them. This is heighten even more due to how quickly information is shared and a rapid number of echo chambers that serve to reinforce those gay ideas. If millennials were the guinea pigs of this "experiment" then Gen Z are the official result of that.

This is true too if a little off the topic of the thread so far. Cults and extreme political ideologies definitely use "grooming" tactics that aren't too dissimilar from those of sexual predators (sometimes they even involve sex.) Troons as have been mentioned already are a good example as are extremists both of all stripes.

 

[Weed Eater]

Grooming in any context isn't right, but from my own experiences I never really saw myself as a "victim" of grooming considering that I was a ballsy idiot who purposefully sought after age-gap relationships. I can't call those people I engaged in relations with "groomers" when in reality it was usually me making all the first moves and engaging sexually first. Nobody really ever thinks or realizes this side of shit, so I figured to bring it to light and hopefully garner thoughts on this as well.

 

[wtfNeedSignUp]

It's the same fucking question as "can I rape a woman and she'll be better off for it". It's not impossible but you are a fucking twisted person for doing it irregardless

 

[Flip: Draw 2]

Grooming in any context isn't right, but from my own experiences I never really saw myself as a "victim" of grooming considering that I was a ballsy idiot who purposefully sought after age-gap relationships. I can't call those people I engaged in relations with "groomers" when in reality it was usually me making all the first moves and engaging sexually first. Nobody really ever thinks or realizes this side of shit, so I figured to bring it to light and hopefully garner thoughts on this as well.

Grooming is about vulnerable people being preyed upon by individuals with the intent of using their vulnerability to make them their little kitten. Even if it's a fucked up situation where the adult should just know better that doesn't fall under grooming. That being said, still fucked. You're not much a victim per se, however the other guy is a creep and/or desperate and you're still an idiot as you've previously stated.
Still boils down to don't fuck kids, don't fuck retards, and don't fuck with people's heads.

 

[mario if smoke weed]

NO. No matter how you try to slice it, you can't deny the relationship was built on predatory behavior, and a shaky foundation leads to a collapsed building eventually - usually sooner than later. When the foundation falters in these unhealthy relationships, the victim ends up irreversibly fucked up in some way. Wonder why grooming is never used in a positive manner, except by the deranged?

 

[pedoguyguykrai]

Like if you have to groom a kid/teen/young adult, then your probably a selfish asshole who ought to pound sand and dont deserve to have a relationship period. Its like 9 times out of 10 most groomers are doing it because women close to their age wont fuck with them, whether its high standards, emotional issues, a desire for control, that turns off normal women, and only naive idiots would fall for that shit hook line ad sinker, no a grooming situation can never fall into a category of healthy relationships, even if the victim of said grooming falls in love, or their fucked idea of love with said groomer.

 

[DDBCAE CBAADCBE]

The fact that you even had to ask tells me we have a huge problem here.

 

[Dustlord]

It depends on how grooming is defined. If you're talking to an underage person explicitly to get in their pants in a few years when they're legal, probably not alright.
If you just met someone when they were underage and later you guys develop a relationship, it could be fine.

 

[Stoneheart]

I don't understand how a normal adult would want to fuck a teen legal or no,

Well something is wrong with you. a relationship, well that something different...

I remember sex in my teen years it was always unsatisfying peer pressured bad times for me, I mean thats just for teens going at it with teens, the only way I see like an older man dating a teen girl, or vice versa is that the older party is exclusively getting the better end of the deal, and the younger party has no idea how their being screwed.

That sounds depressing, maybe you should have tried drugs. also its social status in exchange for sex instead of lazy teen boys with nothing to offer...

Your brain is still in it's adolescent phase until 25. Its the reason why college is jokingly referred to as "Daycare for young adults" because your still a retarded child. I've never met anyone in their early 20's who knew what they wanted to do, and if they did, they were lying. Just like your friend.

I knew plenty of woman in their early 20s who mostly wanted to marry and have kids.

Its like 9 times out of 10 most groomers are doing it because women close to their age wont fuck with them, whether its high standards, emotional issues, a desire for control, that turns off normal women, and only naive idiots would fall for that shit hook line ad sinker,

alot of guys need time to feel comfy with having kids, they want some security and a job that can feed a family, problem is, your kids will be downies if you marry a woman in your mid 30s.

We should end this feminist propaganda, its totaly okay to marry a young fertile woman, they dont get smarter with age, thats why they shouldnt be allowed to vote, or serve on a jury, or hold higher offices.

 

[Haim Arlosoroff]

Absolutely Not.

I'll allow for fucked up families in fucked up locations and time periods, Eastern Russia in 1700 can have first cousin nonsense, a collapsed Mars colony can recycle their dead into protein feed and plant food, China had a word for the act of exchanging children with another family during a famine so you didn't have to kill and eat your own (in fact the 1976 Guangxi Cultural Revolution Massacre had instances of cannibalism despite there being no famine in order to prove their revolutionary passion). But a little boy raised to be the fuck toy of an older women, or the reverse, is beyond gross. You should be shot as one would a rabid dog, all according to the proceedings of law of course of course..

 

[pedoguyguykrai]

Well something is wrong with you. a relationship, well that something different...

That sounds depressing, maybe you should have tried drugs. also its social status in exchange for sex instead of lazy teen boys with nothing to offer...


I knew plenty of woman in their early 20s who mostly wanted to marry and have kids.


alot of guys need time to feel comfy with having kids, they want some security and a job that can feed a family, problem is, your kids will be downies if you marry a woman in your mid 30s.

We should end this feminist propaganda, its totaly okay to marry a young fertile woman, they dont get smarter with age, thats why they shouldnt be allowed to vote, or serve on a jury, or hold higher offices.

nigga its not feminist to tell someone to date their own age, or as close to that as possible, simply on the grounds that means both parties have a higher chance of being treated equally, we're past the whole marriage is a joining of families, property, and as early on because of short life expectancy. Its the same if older male/ younger female, for vice versa situations.

theres no other logical point other than the risk of fathering retards, but even then, its some what of a risk and not a high risk, and you can always abort and try again. Love marriages are relatively a newer modern aspect, and depend on combability, instead of property assets, and value, and because its the current ideal most people strive for, then combability can help build a foundation towards a healthy long lasting relation ship.

Two different generations marrying in can mean fewer chances of compability and the risk of an unhealthy dynamic

. its part of the reason why, at 27 I struggle to even find someone to marry, because in my younger years the only men interested in me was interested in my youthful looks, and bust size, and essentially were old enough to be my dad, or grandfather. the problem is I have more than enough earning capital, and no desire to fill a void for a father figure, in the sense of dating an older man, and run the risk of having that man dictate my life to how he sees fit.

when people want to marry, they ideally want someone to not only provide for any offspring, but to love and respect them as an equal partner, and in some instances with an older party and younger party being together means that the respect can turn unequal. Its just human nature, we gravitate towards people that make us feel comfortable and relate too, and the only ones I've known who legit date men with substainal age gaps, are those who have severe daddy issues and haven't gotten over them. We base are idea of relationships with our parents, and part of not having a dad for most of your life is you seek to fill that void else where in unhealthy means. I only didn;t have a dad in my teen years because he fucked off to be a troon on his dying wife, and have learned that men who are over anal about control in the household, can and will fuck off when times get tough. So as a result I abhor significant age gap relationships, because look at my parents, only ten years apart, and he still ran like a boy when times got tough, and left me to be the only care taker of my mom who was young and beautiful and when she met him, and haggard and bitter in poverty up to her death.

Trad marriages where the man is the sole provider and the woman is the housekeeper, and traditional gender roles and values can fail and its not femenist propaganda to say it. The answer isn't to dismiss criticism of significant age gap relationships, as MUH FEMINISM, but to understand human nature. It's human nature to want to fuck procreate acquire stuff and pass it on to the next generation, that's how humans have been since the dawn of time, but its human nature to love and want to love as well, and respect each other, even Neanderthals understood that emotional complexity. A relationship where the party has an upper hand in terms of age and experience, isn't one conducive to generating a healthy relationship, it can, in rare instances, but its exploitive, and normal people wouldn't seek to exploit others.

 

[Terrifik]

No , its stupid cycle of joke .
yes you will get caught.
yes you will pay price.
yes it a slippery slope & we are being groomed by the school system( use be mormon belief hard work makes profit)
yes the cat is out of box people just want to ingnore back 90's what people do at home is not your problem & doesn't affect your way life.
personally , I agree with metkour that we are reaching point laws being push touching hot stove & fucking around and find out.

 

[Governor Jeb Bush]

nigga its not feminist to tell someone to date their own age, or as close to that as possible, simply on the grounds that means both parties have a higher chance of being treated equally, we're past the whole marriage is a joining of families, property, and as early on because of short life expectancy. Its the same if older male/ younger female, for vice versa situations.

theres no other logical point other than the risk of fathering retards, but even then, its some what of a risk and not a high risk, and you can always abort and try again. Love marriages are relatively a newer modern aspect, and depend on combability, instead of property assets, and value, and because its the current ideal most people strive for, then combability can help build a foundation towards a healthy long lasting relation ship.

Two different generations marrying in can mean fewer chances of compability and the risk of an unhealthy dynamic

. its part of the reason why, at 27 I struggle to even find someone to marry, because in my younger years the only men interested in me was interested in my youthful looks, and bust size, and essentially were old enough to be my dad, or grandfather. the problem is I have more than enough earning capital, and no desire to fill a void for a father figure, in the sense of dating an older man, and run the risk of having that man dictate my life to how he sees fit.

when people want to marry, they ideally want someone to not only provide for any offspring, but to love and respect them as an equal partner, and in some instances with an older party and younger party being together means that the respect can turn unequal. Its just human nature, we gravitate towards people that make us feel comfortable and relate too, and the only ones I've known who legit date men with substainal age gaps, are those who have severe daddy issues and haven't gotten over them. We base are idea of relationships with our parents, and part of not having a dad for most of your life is you seek to fill that void else where in unhealthy means. I only didn;t have a dad in my teen years because he fucked off to be a troon on his dying wife, and have learned that men who are over anal about control in the household, can and will fuck off when times get tough. So as a result I abhor significant age gap relationships, because look at my parents, only ten years apart, and he still ran like a boy when times got tough, and left me to be the only care taker of my mom who was young and beautiful and when she met him, and haggard and bitter in poverty up to her death.

Trad marriages where the man is the sole provider and the woman is the housekeeper, and traditional gender roles and values can fail and its not femenist propaganda to say it. The answer isn't to dismiss criticism of significant age gap relationships, as MUH FEMINISM, but to understand human nature. It's human nature to want to fuck procreate acquire stuff and pass it on to the next generation, that's how humans have been since the dawn of time, but its human nature to love and want to love as well, and respect each other, even Neanderthals understood that emotional complexity. A relationship where the party has an upper hand in terms of age and experience, isn't one conducive to generating a healthy relationship, it can, in rare instances, but its exploitive, and normal people wouldn't seek to exploit others.

5.14.128.28

 

[Thomas Highway]

Good lord this is an actual thread.

 

[L50LasPak]

I'm willing to accept the idea that there are circumstances where it turns out to be fine for the affected party and they somehow go on to live a healthy relationship with the groomer. The problem is we have no means of determining how that happens, or why it happens, or what makes that particular case of grooming different from all of the others. We also have no idea why the groomer doesn't reoffend later.

Since we can't explain it, relying on it is flat out fucking ridiculous. Banning the practice across the board is the best option until neurology matures as a science. One occasional success story is not worth the hundreds or even thousands of cases where victims suffer out and out predation.

 

[Agent Abe Caprine]

No. Combing your hair is sinful behavior.

 

[need shoeonhead nudes]

. its part of the reason why, at 27 I struggle to even find someone to marry, because in my younger years the only men interested in me was interested in my youthful looks, and bust size, and essentially were old enough to be my dad, or grandfather. the problem is I have more than enough earning capital, and no desire to fill a void for a father figure, in the sense of dating an older man, and run the risk of having that man dictate my life to how he sees fit.

Dudes dont care about how much money you make and your children will turn to shit if you're not raising them personally, homeschooling if you can, cooking nutritious food, reading, activities.
women are naturally suited to this housework, "building a nest" while men want to get away for a bit, explore, hunt, strike the earth and come back to a warm happy home. if you are not interested in this then you aren't going to have a really healthy family dynamic. you are just fighting nature, between you and your husband, and your children. there's all sorts of data showing kids from broken homes failing and under-performing compared to the more standard stay at home wife scenario.

>because in my younger years the only men interested in me was interested in my youthful looks
They are not only attracted to your looks but your personality too. you were more bubbly, less jaded, had less bad experiences with men.
Now say that the nicest guy in the world who would never hurt a fly, volunteers at dog shelters, has similar taste in music. Hit on you while there was a 10 year age difference, you would be a fool to not become romantically involved with them, married, and start a family.
And they would be a fool to want to invest their future and success in some crummy harlot who had been stretched out and thought abortions were an acceptable solution to deal with their poor life decisions.