Is this gay? -

Autumnal Equinox

Bacon! Ham hocks! Spare ribs!
Yep, totally gay. What you need to do now is find the glory hole jack off bandit and go jerk him off. That'll reverse the gay polarity. Trust me, I'm a scientist.

round robin
Any straight man's cock would immediately tell the difference between a woman's soft touch and a man's grizzled working hands and would shoot blue flames at the offending predator as a defensive mechanism. Otherwise, yes you're gay.