ITT veteran Kiwis trade war stories -

[HG 400]

Once I was training up sand guys to be soldiers and they all showed up in t-shirts and flip-flops and I was like "where's ur uniforms?" and they were like "idk" and I was like "where's ur fucking rifles???" and they were like "lol i sold it" smdh tbh fam

 

[millais]

Once I was training up sand guys to be soldiers and they all showed up in t-shirts and flip-flops and I was like "where's ur uniforms?" and they were like "idk" and I was like "where's ur fucking rifles???" and they were like "lol i sold it" smdh tbh fam

Did you have to deal with the ANA sand people who smoke hash and rape little boys all day?

 

[HG 400]

Did you have to deal with the ANA sand people who smoke hash and rape little boys all day?

Roger wilco that was a FUBAR situation.

 

[Batman VS Tony Danza]

one time i was checking my corners for a tango and i cut the pie too soon and my marine grade ak 47 went off and i shot henson. we all lol'd.

except henson. he's dead

 

[HG 400]

Once I got dysentery from gross MREs.

 

[Batman VS Tony Danza]

Once I got dysentery from gross MREs.

yeah mres can be tricky. you never know what kind your gonna get. sometimes you get a ham sandwich and other times it's a roasted turkey leg. in my company we had a private who used to shake all of them because he was looking for the tuna casseroles which were a pain to microwave

he's dead.

 

[Clown Doll]

yeah mres can be tricky. you never know what kind your gonna get. sometimes you get a ham sandwich

Get this fucking STOLEN VALOR poseur out of here! If you had ever been in a uniformed service, you'd know that real Army Marines eat Doritos, Cheez-Its and Mountain Dew .

 

[HG 400]

Hamburgers was my favourite.

 

[HG 400]

Get this fucking STOLEN VALOR poseur out of here! If you had ever been in a uniformed service, you'd know that real Army Marines eat Doritos, Cheez-Its and Mountain Dew .

Don't spell poser with a 'u' you look fucking ridiculous.

 

[Batman VS Tony Danza]

Get this fucking STOLEN VALOR poseur out of here! If you had ever been in a uniformed service, you'd know that real Army Marines eat Doritos, Cheez-Its and Mountain Dew .

Did you even Victory Run faggit?

 

[dickwad]

I know you guys posting all cool war stories about war and stuff but here is one of my stories from old thread:
story from my first 6 months.
So it was winter and we were on the second inna woods-exercise. The night guard patrols were running when the "close guard" (guy who patrols in the camp and keeps the stoves running) got changed. This new fellow, lets call him Smith, was woken up for the duty. Smith was not so keen of the idea to pull damp clothes up and go the freezing winter night to look out for other guys tent stoves and guarding the base-near from the invisible enemy. So he decided to stay inside the hot tent half naked and just watch the red glowing stove. Smith found himself feeling to use the bathroom. Of course there were no comfy toilets around, only a dug ditch with a seat to shat on, and it was freezing outside. So Smith had the bright idea to shit on a cardboard box, inside the tent, and hide the box to the neighbouring tent. So he did his business went outside and pushed the shitbox inside a neighbouring tent under the canvas. The tent reeked like shit but the guys tough someone just farted nuclear death. Mourning we were all hurrying to get to company and there were a big hassle.

At the evening countdown lieutenant was going apeshit. He commanded the whole platoon to stand outside where he raged how someone shat inside his bag So what happened was that the smith inserted his little jokebox inside the CO tent where the lieutenant tough in the morning hassle it was his and just threw it inside his bag. The bag got in to the truck where M72 LAW (or something similar) were piled on top of it. The box probably got mushed inside his bag and the shit smeared on his gear. The platoon guys remembered the smell and told the lieutenant about it. Smith admitted his wrong doing and probably got send home. I was in the neighbor platoon at that time. But the shouts were clear enough to carry inside. Shit-Smith you dun goofed.

 

[nad7155]

@Dynastia

Just admit that you are still hurting when that abbo girl blew you off.

It's ok.