Careercow Jack Scalfani / Cooking With Jack - Youtube Celebrity "Chef" and Salmonella Survivor; 2 Strokes and counting

Aaway

kiwifarms.net
I see that Jack Jr and his fiance are on the cruise... I wonder if they are sharing a cabin.
lol yeah right

jack bought a home surveillance camera to make sure they weren't home alone together during the burger wars tour. i bet jack jr is sharing a bed with jack and the girl with tammy. damn imagine how tight it must be in that room with the 3 obese scalfanis. and from what i've seen, the average cruise ship room is pretty small
 
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Reactions: stets

Rei is shit

kiwifarms.net
New largely boring video. Noticed he misspells "Utensil", "Whisk", and "Rachel" (as in Rachel Ray). Guessing it's just sheer laziness but it makes me wonder how awful it'd be to read a text message from Jack.


@9:08 he uses the dead arm briefly. He has clear trouble opening his hand. It feels reminiscent of "Inspector Kemp" from Young Frankenstein.
~2:30 "I ordered it on the internet myself"

Stroke brain fuckup or is he such a boomer that tammy has to order shit for him?

EDIT: he bought salt and pepper shakers to "try them out" :story:
 

captkrisma

kiwifarms.net
6 pts for a passing TD is whatever

its the QB flex thing that makes me lol. so basically you have to use your first two picks on QBs. kid shit
Calling it right now: Jack runs Brady as pick one, fucks everyone else's strategy up, and then follows up with Drew Brees.

EDIT: @RodDangerous is the draft order posted yet? What position is Jack in the line?
 
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RodDangerous

kiwifarms.net
@RodDangerous is the draft order posted yet? What position is Jack in the line?
The order of selection will be randomly determined 30 minutes prior to the draft.

I’ve combed through the league’s five-year history, and it’s embarrassing. There’s only ever been one trade, and the three or four managers that Jack has opted to keep typically make between 35–50 adds/drops per season. Last season, a team named FishNewton defeated Chi-Town FPS to win the championship, and Jack responded by removing them from the league. The average weekly score is ~150 points, and Jack finished last season 0–5 with an average output of ~90 points. Way to mail it in, guy.

I don’t want to clog this thread with fantasy football talk, even though it does relate to Jack. I might be the only Kiwi in the league (for now), and anyone interested in what’s going on can always DM me. Perhaps we can bring some hardware to the Farms.
 

captkrisma

kiwifarms.net
I don’t want to clog this thread with fantasy football talk, even though it does relate to Jack. I might be the only Kiwi in the league (for now), and anyone interested in what’s going on can always DM me. Perhaps we can bring some hardware to the Farms.
I think we can talk about poor moves that Jack makes and how shitty he is in the league, but that should really be it. No need to risk Jack figuring out who's Rod.
 

Aaway

kiwifarms.net
The order of selection will be randomly determined 30 minutes prior to the draft.

I’ve combed through the league’s five-year history, and it’s embarrassing. There’s only ever been one trade, and the three or four managers that Jack has opted to keep typically make between 35–50 adds/drops per season. Last season, a team named FishNewton defeated Chi-Town FPS to win the championship, and Jack responded by removing them from the league. The average weekly score is ~150 points, and Jack finished last season 0–5 with an average output of ~90 points. Way to mail it in, guy.

I don’t want to clog this thread with fantasy football talk, even though it does relate to Jack. I might be the only Kiwi in the league (for now), and anyone interested in what’s going on can always DM me. Perhaps we can bring some hardware to the Farms.
how do you finish a fantasy football season 0-5?

did they start the league in week 9?
 

RodDangerous

kiwifarms.net
how do you finish a fantasy football season 0-5?

did they start the league in week 9?
Poor wording on my part. He went 0–5 down the stretch, losing by scores of 152–139, 121–98, 142–129, 141–86, 94–75. His overall record was 5–9.

There’s no cap on the number of adds/drops a manager can make, which has allowed Jack to do a lot of crap like this:

Screen Shot 2019-08-15 at 12.58.16 PM.png

Screen Shot 2019-08-15 at 1.01.26 PM.png Screen Shot 2019-08-15 at 1.01.39 PM.png

Edit/Update: Jack is on vacation, he is online, and he is mad at the NFL for partnering with Roc Nation.

Screen Shot 2019-08-15 at 2.23.37 PM.png

He also seems to be mad at the fact that players wear pink accessories in October as part of a breast cancer awareness campaign (a campaign that ended in 2017) and the term “social media justice,” which does not appear in the article he’s referencing.

And, uh, does anyone want to send him the definition of “pink sock?”
 
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Bassomatic

True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Aside all the drama the NFL has had of late, ROC nation and NFL is a great combo, many of the players and fans like rap music, Jay-z is a huge artist for past 20+ years. Most non rap fans enjoy some of his work even and any NFL game I go to hear one of his songs (more so the beat but that's stadiums for you).

It's amazing Jack is so clueless and rude, breast cancer is growing in men because, fat dudes. Jack is gonna really ree when the keto doesn't lose him weight but his mastectomy does.
 

breadandcircuses

The Mysterious Senor Hilter
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
So wait, he's upset that during Breast Cancer awareness month, they wear gear with pink on it?

Admittedly, I would like them to wear gear with green on it during November for Prostate Cancer awareness month, but I digress.
 

captkrisma

kiwifarms.net
ROC Nation is for two reasons. Jay-Z can provide entertainment for dirt cheap to games. This brings up the second point: butts in seats. If you promise a free concert by a hit performer, then you can bring in people who might not have bought a ticket that week. Plus, Jay-Z knows marketing (I mean, he was a dealer before), so he knows how to promote his brand without outright promoting his brand.
 

Aaway

kiwifarms.net
Poor wording on my part. He went 0–5 down the stretch, losing by scores of 152–139, 121–98, 142–129, 141–86, 94–75. His overall record was 5–9.

There’s no cap on the number of adds/drops a manager can make, which has allowed Jack to do a lot of crap like this:

View attachment 892057

View attachment 892061 View attachment 892062

Edit/Update: Jack is on vacation, he is online, and he is mad at the NFL for partnering with Roc Nation.

View attachment 892264

He also seems to be mad at the fact that players wear pink accessories in October as part of a breast cancer awareness campaign (a campaign that ended in 2017) and the term “social media justice,” which does not appear in the article he’s referencing.

And, uh, does anyone want to send him the definition of “pink sock?”
i'd love to know his reasoning for adding someone only to drop them a minute later. the fact that his brain is pudding is probably the reason why. also, did philip rivers get injured last season? i'm wondering why he picked up tyrod taylor (only to drop him for a WR a few hours later)

of course he's bitching about the NFL partnering with roc nation. that's some typical boomer shit i'd absolutely expect jack to do
he's clearly mad about it because 1. he hates that the league is doing business with a rapper and 2. because kaepernick is involved. and i love how he's complaining about how the players wear pink. he obviously knows the players wear the pink for breast cancer awareness but i guess he just chooses to ignore that because he's trying to use it as an example of how the league has "gone soft" or is filled with a bunch of "snowflakes" as he'd probably say. jack is the definition of male fragility

he's fucking insufferable

on a side note, future mrs scalfani is looking thicc these days. in a few short years she'll have tammy's body
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