Careercow Jack Scalfani / Cooking With Jack - Youtube Celebrity "Chef" and Salmonella Survivor; 2 Strokes and counting

Adamska

Last Gunman
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Jack won't colab with anyone that has less than 2000 subs because it Jack's eyes at that point "you're taking this seriously". That's why Jack never colabs with anyone...he has tighter rules than YouTube itself.
Man, I guess Charles being more liked than him really got under his edema riddled skin huh?
 

AngeloTheWizard

Bringer of amusing Let's Sperg threads
kiwifarms.net
Jack is a self-styled cooking pro and his expert opinion is pretty much what I would expect an alien in disguise to blabber out, desperately trying not to blow its cover.
"This animal-meat-sustenance for 100 US cents is edible. I can consume it with ease, but without much enthusiasm. If you have a family union with not yet fully developed individuals at your domicile, that demand a more varied asortment of nutrients, you can purchase this and charr it on domesticated fire or an electric heating unit. Pay close attention to receive this animal-meat-sustenance with the correct light-refraction-characteristics."

I mean, all joking aside, this video proves two things:
For one, Jack can't review for shit and for the other, he's really got a low threshold for what he eats and drinks...
"Secret alien reviews" sounds like it could be hilarious for at least a few episodes. "This sugary concoction referred to by locals as 'Mountain Dew' is very pleasing to my tastebuds. As many refer to it as Gamer Fuel, I can only assume that these 'gamers' are some sort of construct that require sugar and a vague citrus flavor to maintain power!"
 

Charlie Delicious

kiwifarms.net

"Pineapple kinda juice slushy mix". A puree, Jack? 12 plus years of cooking in YouTube, Ladies and gents.

Used a 300:1 ratio of pineapple to sriracha mix and complains about lack of heat.

Burnt chicken. Especially the BBQ sauce wings (that he mixed with lime for some retarded reason). A couple of those look like lump charcoal on a plate.

Kinda mad on the Internet that he has a Vitamix and I still have a shitty blender.

Edit. I haven't done a lot of wings myself, but I would think low and slow first to render the fat and cook the meat then finish hot and fast for the crisp skin. Jack likes to do the opposite.
 
Last edited:

Aaway

kiwifarms.net

"Pineapple kinda juice slushy mix". A puree, Jack? 12 plus years of cooking in YouTube, Ladies and gents.

Used a 300:1 ratio of pineapple to sriracha mix and complains about lack of heat.

Burnt chicken. Especially the BBQ sauce wings (that he mixed with lime for some exceptional reason). A couple of those look like lump charcoal on a plate.

Kinda mad on the Internet that he has a Vitamix and I still have a shitty blender.

Edit. I haven't done a lot of wings myself, but I would think low and slow first to render the fat and cook the meat then finish hot and fast for the crisp skin. Jack likes to do the opposite.
dear god those wings look fucking awful

and i love how he didn't show them up close because even he knew. you'd think after all this time doing his cooking show he'd be able to cook chicken without undercooking or burning it
 

arthurdaley

kiwifarms.net

"Pineapple kinda juice slushy mix". A puree, Jack? 12 plus years of cooking in YouTube, Ladies and gents.

Used a 300:1 ratio of pineapple to sriracha mix and complains about lack of heat.

Burnt chicken. Especially the BBQ sauce wings (that he mixed with lime for some exceptional reason). A couple of those look like lump charcoal on a plate.

Kinda mad on the Internet that he has a Vitamix and I still have a shitty blender.

Edit. I haven't done a lot of wings myself, but I would think low and slow first to render the fat and cook the meat then finish hot and fast for the crisp skin. Jack likes to do the opposite.
Steam the wingsfor 5 minutes in the InstantPot and then grill them. Never fails!
 
  • Horrifying
Reactions: Adamska

Begemot

I'm silently judging you....
kiwifarms.net
I just watched the wings video. Just wondering if pineapple is ever used as a marinade at all?
 

JackDavis

kiwifarms.net

"Pineapple kinda juice slushy mix". A puree, Jack? 12 plus years of cooking in YouTube, Ladies and gents.

Used a 300:1 ratio of pineapple to sriracha mix and complains about lack of heat.

Burnt chicken. Especially the BBQ sauce wings (that he mixed with lime for some exceptional reason). A couple of those look like lump charcoal on a plate.

Kinda mad on the Internet that he has a Vitamix and I still have a shitty blender.

Edit. I haven't done a lot of wings myself, but I would think low and slow first to render the fat and cook the meat then finish hot and fast for the crisp skin. Jack likes to do the opposite.
1570550430213.png

You weren't kidding about that ratio. That's literally a gallon of pineapple kinda juice slushy mix, and maybe 4 tablespoons of sriracha.
And... that's the marinade? No salt? No soy/fish sauce?
The other sauce is the complete opposite, with random shit thrown in. Soy sauce, BBQ sauce, Worcestershire sauce, lime juice. A little bit from Asia, a little bit from southern NA, a little bit from EU and a little bit from the carribean. Okay then.
Wings are easy, you don't need to low and slow them, just throw them on a fire til they're cooked.
1570550792383.png

This is how you DON'T cook wings. You want them browned all over, not 20% coal and 80% flesh colored. Holy crap those wings look bad.
He started it at 450 degrees to "give it kinda like the darkening spots it has on it".

He cleaned the grill between wings. "Look how clean that is. Effurrtlessly... Is that even a word? Effurrrt.. effuuurt... IT TOOK NO EFFORT!" The brain is complete mush.

1570551061225.png

Uhhhhh that chicken wing is so raw it's trying to fly away.
His full review of the pineapple sriracha wings: "You can taste the pineapple" "no heat"
His full review of the multi-national medley: "MMM. Way better. That is great."
 
Last edited: