Careercow Jack Scalfani / Cooking With Jack - Youtube Celebrity "Chef" and Salmonella Survivor; 2 Strokes and counting

Bumwine

kiwifarms.net
Not surprisingly Jack is featured at 0:16

I was rewatching the video of his Trifle with pieces of peppermint candies and around 40oz of powered sugar: that monstrosity can compete with aunt Mirna's party salad in Jack's collection of abominations and it's strange people don't talk too much about it maybe because he released it around his second stroke
 
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AnOminous

Really?
True & Honest Fan
Retired Staff
kiwifarms.net
That's why I have trouble enjoying his new videos. The eldritch abortions Mr. Mushmouth squirts out can be fun to gawk at if you enjoy watching somebody fail spectacularly, but the last thing I wanna do is watch his fat face ripple for six minutes while he flaps his slacked jaw. Shit gives me acid flashbacks.
Also you want to see the shitty final product and the dumb cunt now hides it under some shitty bar. Either he is too dumb to know he's doing that or he realizes his food is disgusting garbage and is deliberately hiding it.
 

Misaki Nakahara

Nihon Homosexuality Kyoukai
kiwifarms.net
Also you want to see the shitty final product and the dumb cunt now hides it under some shitty bar. Either he is too dumb to know he's doing that or he realizes his food is disgusting garbage and is deliberately hiding it.
Jack has never deliberately done anything in his entire life. Having the foresight to obscure his rancid food from view would suggest that he knows his food looks bad, and we all know that Jack thinks he's some kind of master chef. It's definitely just that he's too dumb to realise he's doing it.
 

ObeseScreamingBlackMan

True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Not surprisingly Jack is featured at 0:16

I was rewatching the video of his Trifle with pieces of peppermint candies and around 40oz of powered sugar: that monstrosity can compete with aunt Mirna's party salad in Jack's collection of abominations and it's strange people don't talk too much about it maybe because he released it around his second stroke
As nasty as the diabetes sugar blob was, few things Jack-related have more meme power than the Party Cheese Salad.
 
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Adamska

Last Gunman
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kiwifarms.net

As if Coronavirus didn't have us afraid enough, Jack creates a bioweapon.

Also: another 3 fucking minutes of bumper time to get him over the 10 minute hurdle.
Wow, not only does fatty keep on trying to stretch videos for money like the scumbag he is, but he's back to hiding his product behind the charity ad in the sad attempt to hide his shit product while also pretending he's a good human. He's a moron, but he is a shameless one.

Subhuman manchild.
 

The Last Stand

O great auditor of the forums...
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
damn he's really losing it more and more with each day

that's like the third time in the last few months that he's made car noises on camera like a 5 year old
That second stroke must've got to him. Wait until dementia hits.
 
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Super Hans

kiwifarms.net
Wow, not only does fatty keep on trying to stretch videos for money like the scumbag he is, but he's back to hiding his product behind the charity ad in the sad attempt to hide his shit product while also pretending he's a good human. He's a moron, but he is a shameless one.

Subhuman manchild.
It's fucking yogurt. Even if Jack accidentally created a bioweapon, you have to purposely fuck up making yogurt to make it look like something else, especially with video quality that poor and that zoomed out. What's he afraid of?
 

Marissa Moira

kiwifarms.net

As if Coronavirus didn't have us afraid enough, Jack creates a bioweapon.

Also: another 3 fucking minutes of bumper time to get him over the 10 minute hurdle.
I bet he dumped everything out afterwards. He made a wince of disgust upon tasting it.

Like that stuff would have been fine if he mixed it with some fruit and some protein shake mix.
 

salmonellajack

kiwifarms.net
I bet he dumped everything out afterwards. He made a wince of disgust upon tasting it.
100% he did.

A guide to cooking with Jack

1. Make Big T go to the store after a hard day in the office and spend her own money on groceries so her husband can play make believe chef like a big boy.

2. Make Big T, measure ingredients, chop, pour etc... Into bowls for Jack.

3. Jack dumps everything into his Instant Pot.

4. Boils the shit out of everything.

5. Blocks the results of said "cooking" with a banner but does so with a charitable banner so no one can question it. A bit like how Jack acts like a racist offensive dick but covers that up with his fraud Christian persona.

6. Tastes his food. Says it's flawless as he tries not to vomit.

7. Gets Big T to turn off the camera and to dump whatever has been cooked straight into the trash.

8. Orders pizza. It's keto because it has cheese and bacon on it

9. Sit back and watch the YouTube pennies roll in
 

desu91

I'll roundhouse kick Greek philosophers.
kiwifarms.net
I bet he dumped everything out afterwards. He made a wince of disgust upon tasting it.

Like that stuff would have been fine if he mixed it with some fruit and some protein shake mix.
...oh crap it actually tastes like shit, this is horrible. fuck fuck fuck gotta keep a straight face....
(forced smile) "WOW ITS REALLY GOOD...TANGY TOO!"

You can see the lies on the fat man's face.

Edit: Check out the micro-expression of disgust on him.
1585140228639.png
 

captkrisma

kiwifarms.net
...oh crap it actually tastes like shit, this is horrible. fuck fuck fuck gotta keep a straight face....
(forced smile) "WOW ITS REALLY GOOD...TANGY TOO!"

You can see the lies on the fat man's face.

Edit: Check out the micro-expression of disgust on him.
View attachment 1202331
Tangy shouldn't be the word to use here. Tangy things are acidic or have a sharp vinegar taste. Vanilla yogurt shouldn't taste sour or acidic.

In other words: Jack fucked it up somewhere along the way.
 

Freya

i wanna go where the down boys go
kiwifarms.net
Tangy shouldn't be the word to use here. Tangy things are acidic or have a sharp vinegar taste. Vanilla yogurt shouldn't taste sour or acidic.

In other words: Jack fucked it up somewhere along the way.
Even just adding vanilla makes something taste more sweet. He really did fuck up
 
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Reactions: desu91 and Adamska

Captain Ahab

kiwifarms.net
Jack is a liar. Many times before you could easily tell he hated his own food, but he always lied. He doesn’t give two shits whether the recipe is worth anything. It’s all about views. Need I remind everyone of his first attempt to make Yorkshire pudding? He clearly knew he fucked up big time because it didn’t rise at all and ended up looking like burned hockey pucks. He still insisted they looked amazing. He clearly knew what a Yorkshire pudding looked like yet lied through his teeth. That’s the real Jack. Not just a talentless cook but a professional bullshit artist, too.

I’ll leave you with a classic. So yummy, isn’t it, Jack?
150F8298-258D-4CC7-907B-E8F4DB0F263F.png
 

Religion is Dead

kiwifarms.net
Not surprisingly Jack is featured at 0:16

I was rewatching the video of his Trifle with pieces of peppermint candies and around 40oz of powered sugar: that monstrosity can compete with aunt Mirna's party salad in Jack's collection of abominations and it's strange people don't talk too much about it maybe because he released it around his second stroke
The thing about the peppermint trifle is at least the idea of it is grounded in sanity. The party cheese salad has no business existing.
 

captkrisma

kiwifarms.net

A wild Live Chat appears!

Jack talks more politics even though he gets prickly-wicklies when anyone else does.

Jack's boomer ass begs us to protect the elderly, and admits that he didn't know anything until his 30's.

Jack thinks asking people what their favorite color us equals being creative. He steals recipies without accreditation, so I guess its creative to him.

Jack now is super serious about COVID-19

Jack is pissed about walking inside a grocery store.

Jack is proud of the human race because more people are walking dogs.

Holy shit, Jack is going to move the Convoy of Hope banners, not realizing that the banners covered the food.