Artcow Jay Geis / The Golden Knight / The Platinum Paladin / Dick Pierce - The Glorious Return of a Legendary Artcow and Spergilicious Psychopath

wes

kiwifarms.net
Please inform your children about the dangers of interacting with strangers online.

I found this interaction while tossing his dA username into Google, and Jay and marielcatdragon seem to be friendly together. This self-described "teenage girl" writes and produces some faggy Animal Crossing shit, and is into Wendy Testaburger being inflated, if her curated Wendy Testaburger collection speaks to anything. Jay can be found in the comments section of her South Park "artwork." (Which is a trip on its own.) She's relevant because it might be worth keeping track of Amber Alerts for a Mariel McDaniels in the future.

I recommend taking a look through his dA favourites. Highlights include multiple favourites from what seems to be the saga of a elementary school kid being abducted, the classics, Nazi Cartman hitting on Kyle, something he likely whacked off to immediately, tickle fetish, more tickle fetish, Stan's mom, Trump fanart, Emoji Movie fanart, and random pictures of teenage girls, including Marielcatdragon. He shows up in the comments in this as well.

Bonus features: He favourited some South Park fanart by "My time here is ogre" artist cmara. Postal 2 fanart, a game he probably thinks should be real. No doubt he's a huge fan of the feature where you can use cats/dogs as a silencer. There's also a handful of drowning/underwater art in there, if you're looking to check off something on your Slightly Obscure Fetishes bingo sheet.

Some links might be fucked from posting on mobile.
 

Count groudon

Saltier than Njord's left testicle
kiwifarms.net
I've been joyfully reminiscing about the good old days of the pigsteel pussyrepeller and I remembered the time (I believe it was in one of his streams) he got stuck on a part in an old Star Wars game he played and couldn't figure out exactly why he couldn't get past it. It turns out in that particular section you're supposed to be defeated by the enemy to trigger a cutscene so you can move on to the next level, but Jay being the cartoonishly embarrassing pussy he is was playing the game on god mode so he couldn't die. Again I can't stress enough what an absolute dickless coward Jay is. No matter what situation he's in he will always try to go about it in a way where it's absolutely devoid of any challenge while at the same time bragging about how awesome he is. He's literally like a toddler that throws a tantrum when you beat them at one of their little games but dances around and proclaims them self the best in the world when you let them win.
 

Count groudon

Saltier than Njord's left testicle
kiwifarms.net
This makes me wish I'd known about this years ago. These are CWC levels of sperg. :story:
It was fucking glorious man. Every single time you logged on to the farms it was guaranteed that either GK or Jace were in the process of doing something really fucking stupid, or there was new information about just how deep the rabbit hole went with the two of them. The lulz just kept coming and coming until GK realized he was absolutely pwned and faked his own death to get away and Jace turned out to be just some lovable sperg and his motley crew fucking with everyone.
 

Blue Jerkop

True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
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"The outfit is LOOSELY modeled after what I actually wear to work (Yep, with matching pants, I’d look like a REAL Army grunt...but I’m not IN the Army; I only WISH I were)."

I know Autism is always (part) of the answer but coming at this guy fresh it's really hard to figure out how he maintains any footing in real life while being so entirely young in the way he expresses himself (the above deviantart was one of the recent ones). The drawings, the text, everything screams "10 year old"). The lolcow wiki isn't exhaustive, should I assume that he's living with parents? Does he actually hold a real job (not the secret squirrel ones he pretends to be qualified for) and take care of himself at all?

God forbid anyone have fun who isn't a member of the special witty kool kidz klub.
It kinda rots the thread though. Same thing was happening with the Angry Joe thread where every fucking post consisted entirely of "adjective"+"Mexican name" until some brave soul mopped it all up. Or when every third post in the CWC forum was spoilered autism. I don't think anyone is ever as funny as they think they are when they come up with these.
 

Poison_Ivy

Queen of the Couch-Fort
kiwifarms.net
Several Kiwis actually tried to help Jay, at different points throughout the saga. I'd say that there were three "big" attempts done - one early on in his thread cycle, one around the time of the streams, and one around the time he faked his death. Jay would usually misinterpret whatever he was told in some fashion or another, and on the rare occasions he'd take anything he was told to heart, it would be about a day before he and his mom fucked it back up.
Yeeeeeep. I, in some sad attempt, tried to help Jay back then. He said he was interested in learning to draw so I tried. Every time I tried to tell him something or gave him references that would help, he got defensive. :/
 

Alpha Loves You

Keep your head high, even as the world burns
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Yeeeeeep. I, in some sad attempt, tried to help Jay back then. He said he was interested in learning to draw so I tried. Every time I tried to tell him something or gave him references that would help, he got defensive. :/
He probably didn't think he needed to improve. If shows like south park could become famous and praised dispute looking like a car accident, why should he make his work look better for less praise?
And sure enough, years later, he hasn't improved in either skill or personality.
 

ToroidalBoat

Token Hispanic Wacky Delly Friend
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
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Jaimas

Autism War Correspondent
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net

Shadow Fox

Internet Professional
kiwifarms.net
I was so excited for GK's return that I drew a whole comic about him, which considering the amount of effort that went into it might be almost as autistic as Jay himself.
The illuminated letters are a nice touch. I just noticed there's a tiny kiwi in the lower right corner of the front page.

This is some great stuff, my dude. :semperfidelis:
 

Count groudon

Saltier than Njord's left testicle
kiwifarms.net
I was so excited for GK's return that I drew a whole comic about him, which considering the amount of effort that went into it might be almost as autistic as Jay himself.
I love how you have Barry the exact same hairstyle, only infinitely more stylish. Its like his brother is everything he wants to be and it's a pretty great fuck you to ol Jay.
 

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