Careercow Jed Whitaker / Jed05 / Dimmujed / KillerIsJed / Dr. Dinosexual / Amiibo Butt Guy - Clickbait Journo Shoves Controllers Up Own Ass; Squidkid Who's Too Autistic for NeoGAF & Wikipedia

Sylvie Paula Paula

Will perform at weddings and funerals
Jed (Amiibo Butt Guy) Whitaker confirmed for soft boy: https://archive.fo/j0k73
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Fucking huh? Buzzfeed did a thing regarding "softboy culture"?
He's doing very important investigative journalism, aka attempting to get free anal sex toys from manufacturers. Maybe he'll end up leaving video game reviewing entirely and just do reviews of things he can shove up his ass.

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https://archive.fo/ylhGq

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https://archive.fo/GZiQk

The pros of shoving things up your ass in the name of ""journalism""; sex toy manufacturers can scope you out and let you test their products because they know you love shoving things into every hole you have. Apparently testing sex toys is a lucrative job though, so maybe he'll end up getting hired to test their products. But that's just me being :optimistic:.
 

Feline Darkmage

Gamer Gril Queen
True & Honest Fan
Retired Staff
The pros of shoving things up your ass in the name of ""journalism""; sex toy manufacturers can scope you out and let you test their products because they know you love shoving things into every hole you have. Apparently testing sex toys is a lucrative job though, so maybe he'll end up getting hired to test their products. But that's just me being :optimistic:.

He's certainly in need of money after working for free for at least a year.
 

CrunkLord420

not a financial adviser
Local Moderator
True & Honest Fan
Jed has pinned a tweet talking about creation of his infamous Amiibo Buttplug article: https://archive.fo/4Td4Q
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The funniest thing about this is that so many people genuinely misremember this article having Jed as the author. Apparently the casual Destructoid readers just automatically assume any cringe clickbait article is Jed's creation.
 
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CrunkLord420

not a financial adviser
Local Moderator
True & Honest Fan
Lo-Ping the GamerGater on fucking point with this video.

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https://archive.fo/NTkGY

Embedded Video (youtube-dl works with twitter!): https://my.mixtape.moe/qjxnvy.mp4

Fucking huh? Buzzfeed did a thing regarding "softboy culture"?
I missed your post. I think it's in reference to Nick Robinson who was known as a "soft boy" amongst gamejournos but was ran out of the industry in under a week over vague "sexual harassment" accusations. At least, that's certainly why Jed was posting about "soft boys". There are some earlier tweets in this thread of him talking about it.
 

AnOminous

there ain't no turning back
True & Honest Fan
Retired Staff
I missed your post. I think it's in reference to Nick Robinson who was known as a "soft boy" amongst gamejournos but was ran out of the industry in under a week over vague "sexual harassment" accusations.

So "soft boy" means sex pest, but a really weak one.
 

Water-T

Tess Holliday front butt
True & Honest Fan

Once again, Jed thinks he's being clever when all he's doing is making himself look worse.

"Well...uh...uh....sure I like to stuff random objects up my ass, but that means anyone who laughs at me for doing it is a HOMO! Take that! Oh, and they also HATE FREEDOM!"

Sorry to break it to you, Jeddy, but there are so many fallacies to your line of reasoning -

1. You're inferring that simply acknowledging that you clearly love to brag about shoving objects up your bum has any bearing on the observer's sexuality. Human sexuality doesn't work that way. If that were true, the sight of you shoving stuff up your butt would make every gay person straight and every straight person celibate.

2. You're also inferring that there something inherently wrong with being gay by using it as an insult. Considering that you've admitted to dating and fucking men, you might want to rethink your witty rejoinder.

3. Finally, what does freedom have to do with this? Anyone can go placing bizarre objects up their anus, but most people aren't attention starved deviants. The problem isn't that you do it so much as you act like it's something to crow about. I'm sure there are bored soccer moms all over America jamming their empty bottles of white wine up their cooches in the back of their mini-vans, but you don't see them bragging about it all over Twitter, do you?
 

Duncan Hills Coffee

Scream for your cream
2. You're also inferring that there something inherently wrong with being gay by using it as an insult. Considering that you've admitted to dating and fucking men, you might want to rethink your witty rejoinder.
Wait, he's actually done this?

Why in the hell does he get so mad people call him gay? Is he that :autism:?
 

Keystone

True & Honest Fan
Wait, he's actually done this?

He never shuts the fuck up about it, and the writing on the wall says he probably chased off one of his previous roommates by trying to pressure him into gay sex too much; whether the guy wasn't gay or just wasn't interested isn't known.

Why in the hell does he get so mad people call him gay? Is he that :autism:?

Yes.
 
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AnOminous

there ain't no turning back
True & Honest Fan
Retired Staff
Once again, Jed thinks he's being clever when all he's doing is making himself look worse.

"Well...uh...uh....sure I like to stuff random objects up my ass, but that means anyone who laughs at me for doing it is a HOMO! Take that! Oh, and they also HATE FREEDOM!"

He prefers to shove children's toys up his ass. He's very particular about what kind, though, and gets mad when people get the exact brand of children's toy he shoves up his ass wrong.

That's far from the funniest thing about him, it's just fun because he gets so totally not-mad about it every time.

The funniest thing about him really is he used to do it 4free for Destructoid and even that sad publication felt his services weren't worth NOTHING. That would make his writing ability less than zero. I'm surprised they didn't offer to pay him just to go away, like a really shitty busker.
 

Oh Shit I'm Sorry

MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
No one cares

(file uploads are acting like shit, can't get it to thumbnail)

None of the people in the Sarkeesian/Quinn circles Jed spent his Destructoid career sucking up to ever noticed or cared about him (he was too exceptional for even NeoFag and that says it all, really) and everyone else hates him because he's a hypocritical asshole who goes out of his way to start shit and won't stop bragging about how special and unique he is for shoving children's toys up his ass.

So the reason no one cares, Jed, is because you're a twat. You made your bed, now you get to lie in it.
 

Jaimas

HUP HUP HUP HUP
True & Honest Fan
None of the people in the Sarkeesian/Quinn circles Jed spent his Destructoid career sucking up to ever noticed or cared about him (he was too exceptional for even NeoFag and that says it all, really) and everyone else hates him because he's a hypocritical asshole who goes out of his way to start shit and won't stop bragging about how special and unique he is for shoving children's toys up his ass.

So the reason no one cares, Jed, is because you're a twat. You made your bed, now you get to lie in it.

The reason no one cares about Jed has nothing to do with Quinn or the Autism Holy War that was GG. It's because he's a sensationalist idiot who felt that shoving things up his ass and then writing about them, interspersed with calling everyone who likes Japanese games a pedophile and rendering himself a fucking social cancer in the eyes of any company he works for was a solid career move.

If he needs someone to blame, he can try looking in the mirror.
 
The reason no one cares about Jed has nothing to do with Quinn or the Autism Holy War that was GG. It's because he's a sensationalist idiot who felt that shoving things up his ass and then writing about them, interspersed with calling everyone who likes Japanese games a pedophile and rendering himself a fucking social cancer in the eyes of any company he works for was a solid career move.

If he needs someone to blame, he can try looking in the mirror.
Well he's also a FUCKING WHITE MALE so there's also 0 benefit to hanging on to him, because we've seen how these people behave in the past and no crime is too great if you fall under the protected classes (trannies, peeohcees, etc...). Exhibit A, Nyberg.
 

AnOminous

there ain't no turning back
True & Honest Fan
Retired Staff
The reason no one cares about Jed has nothing to do with Quinn or the Autism Holy War that was GG. It's because he's a sensationalist idiot who felt that shoving things up his ass and then writing about them, interspersed with calling everyone who likes Japanese games a pedophile and rendering himself a fucking social cancer in the eyes of any company he works for was a solid career move.

If he needs someone to blame, he can try looking in the mirror.

If you have a bizarre, creepy fetish for publicly ramming children's toys up your ass and then talking about doing that endlessly, the 'p' word is one you shouldn't remind people exists. I would leave Jed alone with neither a child nor that child's toys, lest they end up biohazardous.
 
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