Kiwi Farms

Whenever drama occurs on the internet, certain individuals insert themselves into the conversation, if not taking a proactive approach in perpetuating the drama themselves. While observers usually note and dismiss these individuals as “drama whores”, some hold the potential of evolving into full-blown lolcows as they continue into insert themselves into controversies. Enter John Michael Kelly.


John Michael Kelly (on the right), circa 2015.

From his involvement in GamerGate, reinventing himself as a “Master Debator”, a-logging certain Internet Bloodsport figures, his behind-the-scenes involvement with Cog and others, and his insertion into Weeb Wars, Kelly arrogantly plunges into the latest internet controversy with hot takes that try to magnify his self-importance. He poses himself as a pseudo-intellectual capable of hosting debates and outwitting his opponents. In reality, there is more to Kelly than what he lets on: he is a conniving Gay Ops expert. This is his story.

Prologue

Details about John Michael Kelly’s internet life prior to 2014 remain unclear. Even the URL of his blog site appears to be a “tech blog” by a Jonathan Kelly in 2008:


From what little that could be gathered, Kelly followed Channel Awesome content creator Spoony on Twitter. By 2014, rumblings of strife in the gaming community caught Kelly’s curiosity and paved the way to his eventual lolcowdom.

GamerGate

Kelly heard about GamerGate in passing, but his proper introduction into the subject came after watching videos by Mark Ceb/Action Points:

https://www.youtube.com/user/ActionPts/videos


Notably, Ceb joined a panel with the Washington Examiner's Ashe Scow and Breitbart's Allum Bokhari at the Society of Professional Journalists (SJP) AirPlay 2015 event, where attendees discussed the topics of GamerGate and the ethics of journalism.

From Ceb, Kelly went on an information-gathering spree about GamerGate from two unlikely sources: MundaneMatt and Spoony. After watching GamerGate videos by MundaneMatt and tweets by Spoony, he watched Episode 47 of The Co-Optional Podcast featuring JonTron:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cf7i0z2Zi7U

Not long after, Kelly became redpilled: he started listening/watching livestreams by King of Pol aka @Bryan Dunn (or so he says). Not content with just mindlessly consuming information, he soon took a more proactive approach by writing articles for websites TechRaptor (https://archive.ph/xGyoq) and GamerGate.me (https://archive.ph/pZFj9) in addition to livestreaming about GamerGate. As Kelly stretched what influence he had to other social media platforms, he began receiving a bit of notoriety.

Kelly aligned himself with Theodore Morgan-Majo‏, infamously known as Thidran. Thidran and his ilk were the dark underbelly of GamerGate, originating from the group BurgersandFries:

http://triscales.com/gamergate-council-exposed/

https://archive.md/7e58y

This group called upon the ending of careers, marriages, and even lives of the e-celebs involved in GamerGate:





Eventually, they were called out in this livestream:

https://www.smashcast.tv/CuckenJohnson/videos/263089

Following this, Kelly began denying any involvement with GamerGate:

https://tw.tinf.io/jkellytwit/status/630505577395978240?lang=en

https://archive.md/p5mOL

In truth, Kelly was involved in the splinter group known as GamerGate Revolt, or gg revolt. From late 2015 and into 2016, Kelly applied the triangle into his Twitter name, which was a symbol used by group members:

https://tw.tinf.io/jkellytwit/status/665969492359569410

https://archive.md/7j0bm

https://tw.tinf.io/jkellytwit/status/733064752612704256

https://archive.md/EF3xY

Despite his involvement with a group wanting to destroy the lives of e-celebs who hijacked GamerGate, Kelly attached himself to a particular “face” of the movement: Ethan Ralph. In August of 2015, @theralph invited Kelly on a stream with him. On August 16, 2015, Kelly accepted.



He appeared on the August 19, 2015, edition of the Killstream (video is gone because @theralph got yeeted from YouTube):

https://theralphretort.com/live-on-now/

http://archive.ph/PNr4s

Kelly would appear on later episodes of the Killstream with @theralph afterward from time to time. This attachment later proved costly. In October, annoyed users from /cow/ posted a questionable dox that led to some hilarity later:

https://archive.md/VTdN4

Strangely enough, this did not elevate Kelly’s status from Hanger-On to cow on The Farms, save for these threads:


https://kiwifarms.net/threads/something-gamergate-did.25789/

Cole Lamberson aka Acid Man decided he would go to war on GG Revolt (Kelly can be seen in the following chat log):


Eventually, GG Revolt had its own share of internal conflicts that reached boiling point.

Some members of GG Revolt, rankled by Thidran and Kelly’s Gay-Ops, started turning on them:

http://archive.md/hkh7v




This lead to Thidran and GG Revolt member Variloh feuding:

https://soundcloud.com/jkellysound/variloh-vs-thidran

John Kelly did not escape suspicions by other members, either. Fellow GG Revolt comrade (and lolcow) Seattle4Truth confronted Kelly in a “debate” moderated by Thidran:

https://soundcloud.com/user520322257/seattles-finest

While GG Revolt self-immolated, @theralph’s sins came to light and members of /baph/ (or Baphomet) had enough. They doxed @theralph and they included GG Revolt members as targets. After Thidran’s dox, it was only a matter of time before a Baphomet user eventually posted John Michael Kelly’s dox:


https://archive.md/ykj7I

In a move of self-preservation, GG Revolt made a video feebly attempting to memoryhole the debacles caused by Kelly:


The commenters were not having it and called them out on their omitting of Kelly’s antics:



As for the gay-ops that John Michael Kelly himself was involved in during GamerGate, YouTuber DA Talks summarized them nicely:


If there was ever any indication of how John Michael Kelly felt about his experience in GamerGate, this article encapsulates it:

https://web.archive.org/web/20170325233447/https://medium.com/@jkellytwit/domestic-terrorist-runs-gamergate-board-hinders-free-speech-and-anonymity-7f0b117fe600

http://archive.ph/U07Qi


The Debater

Even before GamerGate met its demise, Kelly began remolding his persona. For outsiders, Kelly’s “expertise” on GamerGate gave him the zeal to take on anyone in debates. Most notably, Sargon of Akkad himself, Carl Benjamin:

UPDATE:
Johnny Fox (the moderator and host of the debate) made the video private.
[A link to watch the debate will be provided shortly, but it can be downloaded here]
Archived Stream (Courtesy of @damian):

He also debated Greyknight of BlueChat:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5_gwLSWtTrE

However, Kelly’s arrogance as an “intellectual” sometimes led him to bite off more than he could chew:

Of course, this did not stop him from being a “religious expert” either:


https://tw.tinf.io/jmktwit/status/860262983779463172

http://archive.md/aoq10

Internet Bloodsports and Gay Ops

While Kelly kept the persona of an “intellectual debater” for the public to see, Kelly was more active behind the scenes by putting to good use the skills he learned from GamerGate Revolt. By the time the Killstream became the arena for Internet Bloodsports (IBS), Kelly’s opinion on @theralph changed.

This did not stop with @theralph, either. Former “faces” of GamerGate turned into IBS combatants. Andy Warski , Mister Metokur (formerly The Internet Aristocrat), Kraut and Tea, and others engaged verbal bludgeoning matches to enthralled audiences. Besides his disdain for @theralph, Kelly also harbored a hatred for Warski as well:


As these IBS figures self-destructed, Kelly was enjoying their roasting. He has made several a-log livestreams against @theralph and Warski:

http://archive.ph/EXLQj

Aside from blasting @theralph and Warski (and other IBS figures), Kelly joined Zoom’s Discord (Courtesy of …. @Colonel J):



From there, he continued to stir the pot.

Recently, Kelly has inserted himself (unsurprisingly) into another internet drama. As the Cog/Drama Queen controversy brewed, YouTuber Ear Juice reviewed the entire situation:


Naturally, Kelly felt he needed to throw his hat in the ring and eventually landed an interview with Ear Juice:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sGrMmj1pwnU

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KYW3eVY5bRQ

Following the interview, Kelly held a stream about Ear Juice:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t47wYmCiqZU

Ear Juice responded in kind by dropping a “lore” video about Kelly:




Nick Rekieta and Weeb Wars

It is unknown why exactly John Michael Kelly decided to involve himself in Weeb Wars. By all accounts, Kelly is not exactly against Vic Mignogna himself, but rather his supporters. Particularly, Nick Rekieta, a lawyer from a small firm in central Minnesota and the host of Lawsplaining the Internet. Whether or not Kelly’s animus stems from Rekieta’s association with @theralph and Mister Metokur or simply he believes Rekieta to be a malicious grifter, Kelly began to brigade against Rekieta.


Though Rekieta addressed Kelly several times in the summer of 2019, he never had Kelly on his show, despite offering him time to do so. However, Kelly did appear as guest in a stream with IStandWithVic (ISWV) YouTuber SenpaisHome:

[It seems the archive channel, cornbreadman, has been nuked]

Rekieta did relent at one point to allow Kelly as a guest on the show, but they could not agree on the date and time. Frustrated, Rekieta decided to do a spite stream in honor of Kelly:


Kelly’s response to this stream is lost to the ether as he deleted all his tweets prior to September 30, 2019 (save for some retweets of tweets made by @theralph).

This did not stop Kelly from getting into Weeb Wars slapfights. Kelly tried to provoke @spirit of e m o s h into a debate:

https://tw.tinf.io/jmkacc/status/1185612923399495681


Conclusion

John Michael Kelly’s internet history tells the story of a pompous man with illusions of self-importance and self-assertion of being an intellectual titan. His past also shows he is willing to insert himself into whatever controversy that happens to be the topic of the day. However, his past sins has finally caught up to him. It is time he should be further ridiculed for his sheer idiocy and lack of self-confirmation skills.

TL;DR:

John Michael Kelly is the living embodiment of this meme:



Special thanks to @Tipsy Tea Cup for retrieving the following (see attachments for the actual document):



DOXXXXX!!!!

John Michael Kelly/vazorium/jmkacc/jkellytwit/UJDaedalus

DOB: September 5, 1989

Address: 11 Oak Trl, Danbury, CT 06811-3054

Social Media Accounts

Special Thanks to the following:
@damian
@Tipsy Tea Cup
@Coach Kreeton Of All That
@Yuusha-sama
@ManateeHunter
@Psicopax

Special shoutout to @Fougaro.