Horrorcow Jordan Duchnycz / Spirit Science / Jordan David River / Jordan Pearce - New Age pseudoscience powers ACTIVATE - now with rape!

[HiramTheGrift]

Spirit Science - Jordan Duchnycz - AKA Jordan David River - AKA Jordan Pearce​

Spirit Science is a New Age internet cult that has existed for a decade as of this OP update. This thread is under new management because almost everyone has heard about Spirit Science but there has never been a place for people to congregate and discuss the wild cult. These guys have everything. Grifting, rape, Manson levels of acid, Space Jews, and - the most elusive of all - true purpose in the universe. Their Youtube (archive) channel has well over 1 million subscribers, they are immensely successful. The secret to their success is similar to the QAnon appeal. What made QAnon appealing to a wider audience was its ability to weave broad conspiracies into one grander narrative. Spirit Science has built a Tolkein-level lore surrounding our world that is honestly fun to listen to at times. The problem is that it is marketed as a religion, and behind all of the colors lies a darker cult that exploits people when they get in too deep.

This OP is designed to condense the hundreds of hours of insane lore into a digestible format while highlighting the cults real life controversies. Much like if someone asked you to explain Goddess Chris Chan (PBUH), many struggle with where to begin in the Spirit Science lore. Most fans were introduced through this video, a video I have watched dozens of times and shown to anyone who would listen. This simple animated video is where it all began for so many cultists. I recommend relaxing one evening, roll a joint or pour a glass of bourbon, and go into this video blind.

Our history is not what we think!​

(Youtube link)
Here is an intro to the first 20 minutes. This is the prequel knowledge to how we as humans got to where we are today, why we need enlightenment, and how to achieve it. It is weirder than you could possibly imagine.

Over the last few thousand years, we have warped our own history. Our stories of the past have been changed, altered, mistranslated, and have completely been misunderstood as we've rounded the curve on the Precession of the Equinox. 00:03-00:14

So we're one sentence in and you're already wondering what the hell the Precession of the Equinox is. Basically, our planet is going to be in the right place at the right time for maximum galactic cummies of enlightenment, but we're getting to get into that later.
We're going to start going back in time to Biblical periods and earlier. How do we know these stories are real? It's because we found the ruins, dumbass

Anyway, we found these Sumerian texts that describe our history. This history goes back hundreds of thousands of years. You might wonder what seperates this ancient Sumerian text from other religions. That's because this time....we have science....Spirit Science

Our history began on a little chains of islands called Lemuria, which eventually sunk into the ocean. In it's place rose Atlantis (looks like Australia). How do we know Lemuria existed? Thanks to Spirit Science, we can see that a chain of coral can be found from Hawaii to Easter Island. This means the islands had to exist, right?

Around this time there were only ~1,000 people on earth. These early humans were so ascended they became the "Ascended Masters" AKA the Naacals (Minute 5) So the Naacal are living in Australia Atlantis. There is a sacred geometric pattern in Atlantis, so based on where one of these tree orbs pulls you is where you will live. It is something akin to chakra energy. This place is so ascended and righteous because the Kundalini Snake Spirit inside the earth is pointing to Atlantis. Afterwards it moves to Tibet but who cares

At this point, we are not humans, but Lemurians. According to Spirit Science, we were a young species with a counscousness level of a "12 year old girl." (Minute 6:10) We were girls because we were a right-brained species. This is not explored further.

Anyway, as you can see in the picture below, two of the 10 circles were not filled by Lemurians. They had not yet mastered these two chakra points. So to help us ascend on our merry way we had two alien species help us. Before we get into our intergalactic helpers, how do we know about all of this? No, not the Sumerians this time, but the Mayans! Pictured below is the Mayan text he cited for the video. I'm not an expert in Mayan writing so I cannot vouch for how accurate the dragon pictures are. So who are our first helpers? Any guesses? Who's that pokemon?

If you guess Jews you would be Antisemitic and correct! (Minute 7)

The first race were the Hebrews, coming from our future. Thoth says they came from off-planet but we don't know where exactly. The Hebrews were kind of like the kid who didn't make it past fifth grade and had to start over again. The Hebrews knew all of the math, the left brain stuff, but didn't get the right-brain aspect of evolving consciousness. They didn't get to upgrade to the next level of evolution so they had to do it all over again. They knew a lot of things that we didn't know yet and brought a lot of concepts to us that we didn't know about. Now, if this is true, it would expkain quite a few things about the Hebrew people in general. They seem to have many sacred geometry symbols hidden within their culture. It also puts the story of Exodus into context. Perhaps Moses incarnated into that lifetime to free the Hebrews because they were not direct descendants of humans and were not being treated fairly. Or could it be that Moses was visited by an ascended master of the Hebrews and guided them to free their people?

So the Jews came from another planet from the future and are here to help us ascend to a higher plane. Their Merkaba (Star of David) is used to travel through planes of existence and multiple dimensions. I should buy an Israeli flag. Hebrews were very good at teaching us how to build spirit technology and enlightening us, but they did not master the emotional aspects of it.

The second group of aliens were the Plaestinians Martians. The Martians are your bad guys. They are an older left-brain species that blue their atmosphere away because they partook in the "Lucifer expirement" which is supposed to be "Cutting yourself off from the universe." Basically they tried to build a Merkaba like the Jews to travel to earth and save themselves but they ended up destroying the entire planet of Mars and only a few hundred could make it. Basically Martians used Jewish tech to ruin our lives

Remember when they said Lemurians(us) were like 12 year old girls? We've evolved to 14 year old girls by the time the Martians arrive. But Martians have the evolution of 70 year old men. So he heavily implies that they enjoy raping us.

No one is happy with this situation. It only gets worse when a fucking divine meteor comes to ruin your day. The Naacals and Lemurians (now Atlantians) saw this as a divine action and wanted to let it hit the earth. The Martians had technology and wanted to blow it out of the sky. You can see how this would create more tension. Despite the Martians being more powerful and evil, they apparently still had a fondness for Democracy and relented. So the meteor smashes into the earth and the Martians are pissed off.

The Martians decided new management is in order and tries to dominate the earth, again, even though it's established they essentially rule. But they want to do it bigger and better than before. Remember how they destroyed their planet and tried to use the Merkaba to escape to earth? They're going to do that again, except use the Merkaba's power to...I don't know...dominate the world through electric cars or something. Either way, they forgot how to build Merkabas because it's been 50k years since their last project. Some Martian intern made a mistake and they accidentally tore a rift between our third dimension and the lower ones.

What you see next is essentially the premise of Scientology: Lower dimensional alien souls pour out of this dimensional tear and latch onto human bodies. This is what causes sickness, misery, etc. It is also what began our decline to the unenlightened we currently are today. We have a strict schedule to reach enlightenment, and we are almost to the end. So we are joined with many interdimensional and intergalactic allies on our quest to reach enlightenment, featuring Zeus, Jesus, Thoth, Jews, Pharaohs, and others.

That's the premise to Spirit Science's religious lore. I recommend watching the whole things and his other videos, because this channel is essentially anime for the Kiwifarms. It's alolcow producing passable conspiratorial cartoons alleging and commiting heinous shit for us to laugh at.

Jordan Duchnycz

Jordan Duchnycz is a peculiar individual. He is an S-tier hippy that radiates grift whenever he speaks. I can't tell if he's charismatic to his followers or he's just a great story teller. To most discerning types, he is one bad hombre. His history has changed a little bit, so I won't mention anything I can't prove. First, here's a recent interview he conducted celebrating the 10th anniversary of Spirit Science.

The Story of Spirit Science - Celebrating 10 Years​

(Youtube link)

Let's talk about the rape. A lot of Lolcows rape, it's an unfortunate reality. Jordan is strange because he admits to having raped this woman, essentially to her face, but can't seem to figure out why that's wrong. Maybe he took too much acid. This is from his article, "When Regret Becomes Rape" here (archive) on his website. Along with Reddit (archive) joining in,

This may look bad, and that's because it is. Here's (archive) a news article talking about Jordan admitting to rape. Additionally the thread comment discussing the rape. And another comment discussing his relationship with OneyPlays and his freaky obsession with Emma Watson. Not to mention that time he trespassed in a hospital and interrupted a surgery by putting on scrubs and walking in.

I don't need to tell anyone how illegal AND dangerous this is

Overall Jordan is an objectively insane cult leader who has admitted to raping female members. It's bad. His content is super entertaining though. When he's not invading hospitals, trying to get people to do acid twice a day for their entire lives, and raping, he makes fun New-Age content that sometimes takes a sharp and dark turn to scientology or "freeing yourself from this physical world." Which is definitely just suicide.
His non-animation videos get scrubbed a lot because he likes to commit and self report his crimes. So please archive everything that you can.

Internet Activity: Website (archive) - Spirit Science Website (archive) - Twitter (archive) - Instagram (archive) - Youtube (archive) - Subreddit (archive)

 

[Stuff and Things]

I remember when i used to hang out in Furry forums, the mayor admin there was a girl that at first seemed to be really tolerant and sane, but it all went to the shit when i tried to talk with her. She told me that she was, and i quote, a: New Age, Vegan, Buddhist and Animist person. Me, trying to not act like an arse, told her that i don't get involved with religions or any kind of 'extremist' group, but that i am fond of some of the Christian values, among other values from other religions.

Then she mocked me and insulted me for not sharing her crazy ideas.

 

[Phil Ken Sebben]

Oh this fool.

It's this kind of new-age woo woo that really makes me weep for the future of mankind.

 

[Mourning Dove]

This sounds a bit like Scientology. It uses scientific-like jargon to try to add credibility to their outlandish claims.

 

[Surtur]

Being a dang, dirty Heathen, I run into shit like this all the time.

 

[Arkangel]

I have a stepbrother who is deep in a lot of new age mysticism practices. I maintain a friendly enough relationship with him, but some of stuff he believes are incredible(meaning unbelievable). I even questioned him about some of the stuff he believes and he put me down as " not on his higher level of thinking."

I try to keep an open mind about things, but if you can't test it, measure it, or objectively verify it in any way, then its not worth consideration. I trust peer reviewed scientific literature more than anecdotes of people reading the entrails of a chicken to tell the future or using a crystal to bring "good luck".

 

[EI 873]

Aw, RationalWiki doesn't have much on this clown. I was hoping for an explanation of... whatever their grand unified theory is supposed to be. I mean, every flavour of New Age woo claims to be some sort of unviersal theory that explains how reality works, but you always find people believing several such theories at once. How does that even work?

 

[Venusaur]

This sounds a bit like Scientology. It uses scientific-like jargon to try to add credibility to their outlandish claims.

Yes, even in Spirit Science's History of Human Evolution there's a bit that's really similar to Scientology. Basically an interdimentional rift opens up and bodyless beings pour into our world from it, they then attatch themselves into the bodies of the local humans (Sorta like Scientology's Thetans). This inturn makes people turn into "monsters", stuff like, somebody having the head of a bird or horns. I guess this was their attempt to explain deities like Anubis and Horus.

 

[Andrew Noel Schaefer]

I wanna use Spirit Science to have this forum go back to Chris Trolling.

Unfortunetly, the one true religion is Hulkamania, so it woudent work.

 

[Artard]

Every crystalgroover I know is a complete mess. I've never known one that had their life together in a meaningful way.

I have an aunt who after 3 divorces, multiple kids taken out of her custody, etc. became a "holistic healer" and then changed her business card to read simply "SEER". Those spirits/energy beings/thetans/ghosts have a weird sense of humor to only speak through complete fuck-ups.

 

[Arctic]

Aw, RationalWiki doesn't have much on this clown. I was hoping for an explanation of... whatever their grand unified theory is supposed to be. I mean, every flavour of New Age woo claims to be some sort of unviersal theory that explains how reality works, but you always find people believing several such theories at once. How does that even work?

Strangely, none of these New Age religions ever seem to explain just how the theory works.

 

[Abethedemon]

Jordan is the host of Spirit Science. It is a popular website and video series promoting New Age pseudohistory and pseudoscience whilst ripping off Extra Credits.
http://thespiritscience.net
https://www.youtube.com/user/TheSpiritScience
He has gone on record promoting Crystals over regular medicine and even saying Jews are from space.

In addition, a person critiquing him received a response that was fairly ignorant.

What do you guys think? I think that there are more people who associate with him, but it's very weird stuff.

 

[NobleGreyHorse]

Can you be a little more specific about what makes this guy lulzier than all the other New Agers out there? I mean, there's no shortage of woo floating around. James Randi will be in business until he dies, debunking all this shit. Is it just that he makes response videos?

 

[Abethedemon]

Can you be a little more specific about what makes this guy lulzier than all the other New Agers out there? I mean, there's no shortage of woo floating around. James Randi will be in business until he dies, debunking all this shit. Is it just that he makes response videos?

I think he's kinda lulzy because he's followed by many people and made long, rambling movies about Crystals and the Atlanteans.
I do think that a thread on New Agers in general would be good. Maybe we should turn this thread into that.

 

[autisticdragonkin]

I like his animations despite not liking the content

 

[Abethedemon]

I like his animations despite not liking the content

Yeah, they have a charm to them, especially when more surreal topics are being discussed.

 

[Functional Animal]

Oh dear sweet space Jews, Jordan is fucking batshit stupid.

Martymer81's video series covers his bullshit pretty well. His video on the history video is fucking gold.

 

[autisticdragonkin]

here is a video on my favourite symbol
although he seems to claim this literally I like the symbol just because it looks cool

 

[Jace E. Denton]

I am all for open mindedness and new theories, but they have to actually be, you know, good theories, not just whatever sounds cool and magical to someone.

The big difference between a new ager and a legitimate historian is that new agers want to invent proof, historians want to discover it.

 

[Superior Watermelon]

I'm surprised this hasn't been brought up before. I have those friends on Facebook who post his shit, and this guy is insane. He thinks that the power of crystals and positive though will heal you. His website is full of crazy, nonsensical jargon. He also has a Deviantart and Tumblr . Jordan and his cronies are a whole bunch of whackjobs who believe all kinds of crazy shit like empaths. What crazier is people actually believe this guy. In reality, Jordan is trying to hock new age shit too people and sell his book.