Jude Valentin / Judy Valentin / MermaidRoyal / MermaidQueenJude / MerQueenJude - Twitch Streaming Clout Chaser, Sometimes a woman, Obese

What is Judy's date going to be like?

  • Part of a DnD campaign and therefore pretend

    Votes: 18 14.3%
  • On webcam with some rando, meaning she will not leave her cave

    Votes: 49 38.9%
  • With Mel or some other side character, its just hanging with friends

    Votes: 12 9.5%
  • Hanging with her cats

    Votes: 12 9.5%
  • She is actually just ordering two different take out meals for herself

    Votes: 44 34.9%
  • Very fat

    Votes: 56 44.4%
  • A legitimate date but it will probably go horribly so we won't hear about it

    Votes: 27 21.4%

  • Total voters
    126

TurdFondler

kiwifarms.net
15 seconds

I made it 15 seconds. Here's my rundown:

Girl in the top right is carrying the game. She's chasing marginal clout and by my estimations has a decent chance of getting somewhere. She has the social know how to play off Jude, letting Jude rattle off her clearly prewritten script. Everyone else looks entirely defeated and disinterested. Jude doesn't bother to read the room and throw the other spergs a bone.

I bet you the top right girl will essentially backseat DM and let the painful 1 shot play out, becoming slightly more bitter as a person once it's over.

Stylistically, imagine a Final Fantasy script read by a sarcastic moderately literate teen with heavy valley girl inflection.
 

MicrowavedApple

kiwifarms.net
You're not joking, every other word out of her mouth is "like."

I'm watching Jude trying to set the scene for the group now, and yikes, her story telling skills are about as lousy as you could expect. Did she actually attend any of those acting classes?

That Milana girl is definitely holding it together the best, the other two thin girls are trying, but look bored as fuck, and I haven't even heard a peep from the other death fat yet. It's a snoozefest.
 

PurpleEater

kiwifarms.net
I bet one thousand Taco Bell pizzas (may they RIP) that Jude's date was virtual and with someone just as ugly and autistic. I cannot imagine this broad leaving her house to do anything anywhere. She was probably sitting in her squalor, covered in cat hair and bra-less as usual (remember Jude refuses to wear bras? shudder), some terrible makeup on the folds of her fat, counting down the minutes until the date was over so she could stop pretending to be interested in what they were talking about and order more Seamless.

Screen Shot 2021-06-19 at 10.13.06 PM.png


Most young people might splurge on $20 to go to a nightclub, not this. This is....beyond pathetic. What exactly do people get out of watching these boring streams?
 

Barbarella

Guards! To the Mathmos with this winged fruitcake.
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Straight dudes (which Judy likes) don’t understand makeup and things like white freckles. If there was even a date, he saw a much fatter chick than he expected, with nasty hair, squinty eyes, and white spots on her face. He probably thought she was diseased, and left ASAP. If the poor guy had to speak to her, I feel bad. All she can do is scold. Only a fat, utter simp could stand her.
 

mikal

kiwifarms.net
Oh man. This is painful. A good DnD group requires you play well off each other. Kind of like synergy. You story board off each other essentially. That’s what DnD is. This group is so painfully stiff and boring. It’s like they are all trying to play off Jude. Instead of group building a story. They are just rotating around what Jude wants. Milana would actually be fun to play with a different group probably. Seeing as she’s the only person not completely latched on to playing off Jude and trying to immerse in the world. If it wasn’t for her this would be completely unwatchable.
 

Sticky Fingers

kiwifarms.net
This has to be the biggest lie I’ve ever seenView attachment 2279165
I don't necessarily think it's a lie. I watched through most of that rp and sure, as a group of friends trying out a new game for the first time, it probably was fun. But from a viewer's point of view? Not so much.

I don't know why I keep wanting to give the benefit of doubt to these ttrpg streams of Jude's. I haven't watched this genre of streams before so maybe I just don't like ttrpg streams in general? But no, when the better players hit their stride it's actually fun and engaging, but every time Jude opens her mouth it's like a void enters the chat. My brain just tunes her speech out. It doesn't help that she's an inexperienced GM and doesn't know the game that well (both Vana and Kat know the rules and mechanics much better and help her out multiple times), and her storytelling is just... bad. At one point she brags about causing Vana to look shocked at a plot twist, like she "made that happen"? When actually Vana admitted to being confused and misunderstanding the whole twist, and I don't blame her. It was convoluted af. Oh and she named multiple NPCs Emily so add that to the confusion.

So aside from Jude's total lack of charisma, there's just a lot of baby's first GM mistakes at play. Plus the group hasn't played together before so it takes a while for them to relax, especially the less experienced ones. Why not do a trial run off stream first and work out the kinks there? Get some GM practice under your belt before you go public with it? Or, you know, at least learn the rules and mechanics of the game you're running? She brags about how much work she does behind the scenes to prep but it sure doesn't come off that way when she streams.

Was this supposed to be the fat babe ttrpg? Or am I confusing that with something else.

To finish off, some caps from the stream. Because "we love to see it," don't we?Screenshot_20210620-113904_Twitch.jpg
Judy "I run the most aesthetically pleasing stream on Twitch" Valentin

20210620_180421.jpg20210620_180355.jpg20210620_180641.jpg20210620_180809.jpg
 

Morgana

Fatty-stalker extraordinaire
kiwifarms.net
Stream recap:

This last stream was painful to go through, I could feel my soul leaving my body as it went on, alas, I survived. Anyways here’s a recap because I refuse to suffer in vain.

Jude is supposedly running a one shot (short story/campaign that only takes a few hours to complete) from some random tabletop called "Thirsty Swords Lesbians" which I don’t know shit about but she said she chose it because the authors have explicitly said they don’t want "bigots" to play it and they "empower and respect fat bodies".

On this roster we have top right gurl, the one mentioned earlier, who is experienced with dungeons and dragons, Vana, her DM (a poor one) from dnd as well and two newbies.
The whole concept apparently is that everyone is either a woman or nonbinary and everyone is permanently thirsty (no, not for water) all the time. Jude did not explain any of the mechanics in stream except one that she never really uses so it’s extremely confusing since this tabletop is not well known at all. All in all it makes for a very puzzling watching experience.

Jude is a terrible dungeon master. She is reading off some kind of script on her computer with no inflection in her tone and does not do accents, voices or even any show of emotion. She also pushes her players into things they are clearly not comfortable or wanting to do.
Basically railroading the entire game by forcing the players to act and go places (I think they’re supposed to help save their empire when one of them is playing a pop star who doesn’t know how to fight???? The story does not make sense).
They keep talking about being sooo gay and pretend flirting with npcs and between each other.
Some roleplay highlights :

- Vana asking what another player character smells like and the other player (top right girl) answering with "musky".
- Them roleplaying a fucking panic attack lol even pretending to hyperventilate.
- Jude has two ballroom scenes in one single session. So much imagination.
- Jude makes them meet two world rulers in one session with just a cab (-sorry... flying ship) ride in between.
- Jude actually said the words : "I like a femme that knows how to swallow" She said those words with her own mouth and I cried inside.
- "I’m gonna ignore that rule!" Jude, 2021.

Outside of roleplaying, Jude’s world building is atrocious. She is not explaining anything to the characters or the audience and describing places straight out of baby’s first epic fanfiction. She has them start out at a party and does not give them any opportunity to roleplay or ask around. From what I can be bothered to remember, Jude’s world is some very boring "bad empire took over smaller, good planet, got fought off but is now coming back oh noooo". At some point she also said "This is a very small planet where everyone knows each other" I don’t think this gorl knows what planets are unless we’re on some Petit Prince kinda deal with micro planets. But I think that would be giving her imagination too much credits.

Jude was also EXTREMELY anxious and kept repeating "um" "erm" and stumbling over words. Theater major, everyone.
Some of the girls spent almost one hour in complete silence and look like they want nothing more than to escape this one shot but they reached their donation goal so there’s going to be a second and third episode...... rip gorls.

Of course, no maps, tokens or anything that requires any effort or prepping from the DM’s part. No npc is illustrated. Jude truly went minimal effort for prepping. I am especially judging her for the lack of a map as it’s extremely easy to download one online (it’s also easy, but time consuming, to make it yourself) easy to set up with an app such a roll20 or something similar AND this is supposed to be a professional level show.(edited)
The players are constantly confused by what is happening because she is poorly explaining everything.

She has to push them into every plot point without letting them explore organically.
This is just as bad as what I thought it would be.

There are two kinds of ttrpg experiences. They often mix, at most tables at least, but some games tend to learn towards one or the other although most people prefer to have them balanced : Roleplay and Gameplay.

In a roleplay heavy game, players are encouraged to play their characters and act in character as much as possible, which includes a lot of talking. It also requires being comfortable acting and improvising, as such it is not something everyone likes and it tends to require a bit of experience to master.

In a gameplay heavy game, players will be doing mostly fighting or actively using mechanics that are not dependent on acting out in character. A lot of traditional dungeon dwelling dnd is like this. At most tables, both mix and good dungeon masters will do a lot of prep work to make both parts enjoyable including making custom maps, characters and sometimes even music playlists for each setting.

For a beginner DM, especially one that has to deal with half of players being first timers, I would recommend gameplay heavy games, to get an understanding of the games mechanics and ease the new players in. Thirsty Swords Lesbians appears to be a roleplay driven game, as I do not believe they have done any fighting this whole time. Those require a lot of confidence and very often experience to turn out entertaining and enjoyable. For her first dming experience, Jude would have had better luck using a heavily documented ttrpg such as, once again, dnd, which she has a little experience playing. She can easily find tutorials online and advices on how to dm for 5e as well as plenty of already written up campaigns and ready to go maps.

This could have been better, had Jude done the minimal amount of research and not jumped onto the first woke ttrpg she found.

As an example to how bad this is. Jude guests on a show called In Too Deep regularly. I never get around to watching more than five minutes because it’s also bad and I’m not into watching dnd be played unless it’s terrible enough to loop around and be entertaining. They average 10-20 ccv. They also have :
- A theme song
- Decent art of each character
- A simple opening with still shots of characters
- A logo
- A stylized title card


This is how low effort Jude’s attempt at DMing is. This supposedly professional ttrpg player is being outplayed by some amateurs doing it for fun.

Case in point, here is the art from In Too Deep :
in too deep art.jpg


And here is the art from Jude’s one shot :
AuthenticPicasso.jpg
Real Van Gogh.jpg
based mona lisa.jpg
TrueMonet.jpg
rareRembrandt.jpg

Seeing those you’d think Jude is the one running a 15 viewers campaign! But nope. Truly amazing.

My theory is that, ironically, the hobbyists being hobbyists have an actual job outside of streaming so they have money to spend on commissions, unlike Jude, who needs to cultivate her delicate figure with only the most scrumptious dainty Taco Bell order and saves all of her pro gamer money for it. She said explicitly one of the players (The pink haired fat one on the bottom right) drew it for her. Between that and knowing Arielle Jane made her emotes I wonder if Jude sees friends as just an opportunity to get free stuff. Unfortunately for her, her friends are not that talented, or maybe not experienced enough.

She also got raided and reached 700 viewers then lost 300 of them in a single minute.

TLDR : I am a sperg. Jude went so low effort a basically unknown stream with little to no viewers does it better than her and this stream is a very uncomfortable yet fascinating experience.

Completely unrelated but : Could Judes date have been another gender blob such as herself? She does repeat she is "on the asexual spectrum" a lot so she wouldn’t need to be attracted to another fat "nonbinary" to call it a date.

Edit: reformatting
 
Last edited:

White Noise

kiwifarms.net
I didn't expect anything to come out of Jude's date, but I'm still disappointed. Seeing how Jude had gone silent about it, her date was either pretend, or whomever she catfished took one look at her and ran while they still could. But on the other hand, it's always fun to speculate:

Love In A Chair
By White Noise

Oh, summer sweet, for love is in the air
Jude cannot wait for her date to appear
Upon her screen, as she sits in her chair
What face did Jude see? What can we compare?

Not just a man, a lesbian man
He's not like any of those other girls
He's not white, he's a little brown or tan
He's not a bigot, no clutching at pearls

Not just a woman, they're nonbinary
They're not a regular weight, more to love
They're not a cheap date, they need finery
They're not a fat body I'll get rid of

All of these fantasies can be dismissed
Because true love for Jude doesn't exist
 

SpumbleSplabloo

Powered by the Apocalypse
kiwifarms.net
For those curious, Thirsty Sword Lesbians uses the PbtA system. I'm not familiar with this particular ttrpg, but the system is near and dear to me. The intent with PbtA games is that they're nearly entirely roleplay-driven rather than gameplay-driven, with the players describing their actions and the Keeper (if that's what it's called in TSL) calling for rolls when relevant. Done right, it's the most immersive system I've played yet intuitive and rules-light enough that someone new to ttrpgs can dip their feet in fairly quickly. I ran a different game in the PbtA system for two players who had never played a ttrpg before and going over rules took maybe 15 minutes. Done wrong it's whatever I wasted my evening yesterday watching.
 

Maw

Decease and desist I have contacted my lawyer
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
ETA Jesus, how old is Joyce anyway? It’s not just the white wig and brows, her skin has the look and texture of a used, dog-chewed beauty blender. What’s with all these 20 something young women looking like homely grandmas?
View attachment 2259194

That’s one of the more flattering pictures of big Joyce.

One of the worst where she isn’t trying so hard to hide the fat she isn’t ashamed of:
E6929D31-B194-4F35-8353-818853ED4D95.jpeg
 

Maw

Decease and desist I have contacted my lawyer
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Hahhahaaaa, must suck to be Asian and a hamplanet. I can only imagine her aunties using her as a warning to younger relatives "Be careful, or you'll end up like JOYCE! Bitter and fat!". :lol:
like Jude, she seems to be living in a delusion in which she's a Super Hot Bad Bitch.E18BF03D-AAEB-49AE-ADCE-F3B1A868C762.jpeg
Amazing how Joyce and Jude have the same pig nose… 🐽👯‍♀️🐽



She could easily cosplay Kim Joyce-Un. Her neck, nose, and facial structure would be a shoe-in.

0E7A1F83-49E0-4132-BD3B-8A2079D03821.jpeg


She could do it at a drag king show and slay all those white bitches who laughed at her and called her General Tso back in high school.
 

Not me

It's a me, Meeoow!
kiwifarms.net
That’s one of the more flattering pictures of big Joyce.

One of the worst where she isn’t trying so hard to hide the fat she isn’t ashamed of:
View attachment 2280391
I know I'm gonna derail this thread further but I have no idea what she sees in this character. This character is very slim, very well build and much better made than her in general. Her "Cosplay" is too wardrobe-ike and too little details and too little work. The ears are bad, the wig is bad, don't get me started on the eyebrows...the attitude? Non existent.
Sorry
 

merwitchpigRude

I tweet as Jude on my kiwi profile
kiwifarms.net
She has a stream right now, sponsored by Adidas (kek!!)
About priidde and lgbtqia students blahblah. Unbelievable!

She is doing her best poorly to act educated about trans rights. Trying to act like a sympathetic moderator. I bet she told adidas she is queer & trans, being the lgbt-appropriator that she is.

She is acting so aggrieved like an armchair stonewall for qweer, brown, pee oh see, disabled folx.


Edit: someone please archive her lecccture. 1.5 hours only.

 
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thejackal

True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Bitch in here looking like Sammy Sosa.

sammy-sosa-through-the-years-rex-ftr.jpg
sammysosa.png

Judes bio mom was dating her adopted mom's daughter, woah. wow, her dad just brought her mail and she made the most sour ass face. he is def still living there.

Pretty sure she just got up to tell her dad to STFU as you could hear him in the stream.

talkingtodad.png

She's not going to Pride. Because she "has a bad time, every time". She doesn't like being around "drunk and high" people. Just admit you're a fucking shut in.
 
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