- Joined
- Aug 16, 2019
I just sent mine to @MerriedxReldnahc and didn't realize about the extended deadline. I could probably do one extra if you guys are short.
Kiwi Farms Tenth Annual Secret Santa - Posted on the 10th of November
- Thread starter The Last Stand
- Start date
-
Registration closed, comedy forum, Internet drama, Sneed, etc.
- Joined
- Aug 20, 2014
Done and sent to The Last Stand for forwarding
- Joined
- Sep 10, 2013
- Highlight
- #424
Merry Christmas, frends! 
I'm going to send out gifts sometime today, I'm gathering what people sent me right now and will send out the gifts once I get free time. Otherwise I'd have my laptop out at my grandma's kitchen table saving weird images on my hard drive.
I'm going to send out gifts sometime today, I'm gathering what people sent me right now and will send out the gifts once I get free time. Otherwise I'd have my laptop out at my grandma's kitchen table saving weird images on my hard drive.
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- Joined
- Nov 15, 2017
I sent mine to my helper but I'm not sure if they saw the message.
- Joined
- Jan 4, 2021
Mine is finished and turned in. I would just like to say that if you get a crappy present (mine), please remember that it is the thought that counts. I had a good time trying to create something for my person and I hope they like it, but they need to have lowered expectations for that to happen, lol. Merry Christmas everyone!
- Joined
- Nov 15, 2017
Same for mine tbh, only because I've been writing a lot of chapters for a project and had limited time to make something.
- Joined
- Sep 11, 2019
Jannnnnnnnnnyyyyyyyyyy where’s the thread?
- Joined
- Aug 17, 2018
I just got in the home.Jannnnnnnnnnyyyyyyyyyy where’s the thread?
- Joined
- Dec 20, 2018
I'll try to get mine done before midnight tonight. Even with the extension, I feel like my Christmas gift to be given on Christmas. It's just something about that makes me feel lazy otherwise. Please, this isn't me saying that my gift should also be done by tonight if you're doing mine.
Edit: Too wasted to finish lmao. Tomorrow for sure.
Edit: Too wasted to finish lmao. Tomorrow for sure.
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- Joined
- Feb 21, 2020
Thank you for the extra time, I've definitely needed it. But still working and I hope to finish either tonight or tomorrow night. Wish I could have finished before Christmas, but life is like that.
- Joined
- Aug 17, 2018
Jannnnnnnnnnyyyyyyyyyy where’s the thread?
Secret Santa 2021 Gift Showcase
Hello everybody! Thanks to all that participated in this year's Secret Santa! This is the thread to showcase your awesome gifts from your fellow Kiwis! If you had not received a gift, do not worry. This will go on until New Year's 2022.
Apis mellifera
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Aug 23, 2020
Terribly sorry extremely ill with the african gut parasite or whatever i have, gonna have to drop out. so sorry about leaving it until the last minute, if you happen to be my secret santa feel no obligation to do my gift. much love from me and the missus ❤
- Joined
- Sep 30, 2018
So I got @Agran and he was banned at the very past minute so I'm posting my gift to him here
One fucked up morning after a night of ketamine abuse, Agran woke up in the middle of an alley in the city of San Francisco. "Man, I hate San Francisco" he said to himself. "Nothing but niggers, faggots, and kikes"
Next to him was an old man's body with a magical handgun that had unlimited bullets, and so much meth that it could kill an entire orphanage. "OH HOLY SHIT." he exclaimed, "THIS IS GONNA BE ONE HELL OF A FRIDAY NIGHT"
After he abused all the meth, he ripped off his clothes, took the handgun, went screaming out of the alley "FUCK JANNIES AND FUCK NIGGERS"
He shot all the people he could see: vegan strippers, hipsters, Japs and Gooks, even babies, but only the ones that were mutts. For every person he killed, his penis got a bit erect.
"JESUS FUCK I LOVE METH" He shouted. Then, out of one of the buildings, came a mysterious looking man with a business suit on, who also had a magical gun.
"WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU DRESSED LIKE THAT" Agran screamed to the mysterious looking man. "I'm a man of, let's just say, wealth and taste." said mysterious man replied back.
"NIGGER SPEAK ENGLISH" Agran said in a drug fueled rush. "They call me the Anti Christ, I'm here to look for the second magical gun so I can fufil my destiny as ruler of this god forsaken planet"
As soon as Agran heard the antichrist finished his sentence, he shot him in the head, put his balls on his face, teabagged him screaming "I HATE THE ANTICHRIST, I HATE THE ANTICHRIST. FUCK THE ANTICHRIST"
Agran turned the body over, and starting raping the lifeless corpse of the antichrist. "I HATE THE ANTICHRIST, I HATE THE ANTICHRIST, I HATE THE ANTICHRIST." he repeatedly screamed as he raped the body.
For each time he said that, the thrusts were harder and harder. After about 20 minutes of epic thrusting, he had finally came so much that it looked like a tsunami had come into San Francisco, except instead of water, it was nothing but semen.
"WOOOOOOOOOO"
In the distance of the semen tsunami, was an 50 year old jew just about to exit a synagouge. As he leaves the building, he notices the semen tsunami and screams "OY FUCKING VEY" as Agran screamed with delight.
All the jews died drowning in semen that day. RIP.
Immeadiately after the tsunami, he had landed near the golden gate bridge.
"GODDAMN THAT'S SOME GOOD SHIT." he screamed. He noticed the second Gun dangling across the bridge. He took the gun and he felt invincible.
"UH YEAH, IM THINKING TWO GUNS. PRETTY FUCKING BASED"
then he ran into the daylight waggling his penis and magic guns like a character from Saints Row The Third as he headed north to Seattle to start his day again.
The End.
Next to him was an old man's body with a magical handgun that had unlimited bullets, and so much meth that it could kill an entire orphanage. "OH HOLY SHIT." he exclaimed, "THIS IS GONNA BE ONE HELL OF A FRIDAY NIGHT"
After he abused all the meth, he ripped off his clothes, took the handgun, went screaming out of the alley "FUCK JANNIES AND FUCK NIGGERS"
He shot all the people he could see: vegan strippers, hipsters, Japs and Gooks, even babies, but only the ones that were mutts. For every person he killed, his penis got a bit erect.
"JESUS FUCK I LOVE METH" He shouted. Then, out of one of the buildings, came a mysterious looking man with a business suit on, who also had a magical gun.
"WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU DRESSED LIKE THAT" Agran screamed to the mysterious looking man. "I'm a man of, let's just say, wealth and taste." said mysterious man replied back.
"NIGGER SPEAK ENGLISH" Agran said in a drug fueled rush. "They call me the Anti Christ, I'm here to look for the second magical gun so I can fufil my destiny as ruler of this god forsaken planet"
As soon as Agran heard the antichrist finished his sentence, he shot him in the head, put his balls on his face, teabagged him screaming "I HATE THE ANTICHRIST, I HATE THE ANTICHRIST. FUCK THE ANTICHRIST"
Agran turned the body over, and starting raping the lifeless corpse of the antichrist. "I HATE THE ANTICHRIST, I HATE THE ANTICHRIST, I HATE THE ANTICHRIST." he repeatedly screamed as he raped the body.
For each time he said that, the thrusts were harder and harder. After about 20 minutes of epic thrusting, he had finally came so much that it looked like a tsunami had come into San Francisco, except instead of water, it was nothing but semen.
"WOOOOOOOOOO"
In the distance of the semen tsunami, was an 50 year old jew just about to exit a synagouge. As he leaves the building, he notices the semen tsunami and screams "OY FUCKING VEY" as Agran screamed with delight.
All the jews died drowning in semen that day. RIP.
Immeadiately after the tsunami, he had landed near the golden gate bridge.
"GODDAMN THAT'S SOME GOOD SHIT." he screamed. He noticed the second Gun dangling across the bridge. He took the gun and he felt invincible.
"UH YEAH, IM THINKING TWO GUNS. PRETTY FUCKING BASED"
then he ran into the daylight waggling his penis and magic guns like a character from Saints Row The Third as he headed north to Seattle to start his day again.
The End.
- Joined
- Oct 13, 2019
wheres my friggin present 
happy christmas.
happy christmas.
- Joined
- Aug 17, 2018
wheres my friggin present
happy christmas.
Secret Santa 2021 Gift Showcase
Hello everybody! Thanks to all that participated in this year's Secret Santa! This is the thread to showcase your awesome gifts from your fellow Kiwis! If you had not received a gift, do not worry. This will go on until New Year's 2022.
Secret Santa announcement and gift exchange there.
Attachments
- Joined
- Dec 18, 2019
Just got mine sent in to Last Stand.
- Joined
- Jan 4, 2021
I haven't gotten my present yet, but just want whoever my Secret Santa is to know that they can take their time. I've had a difficult Christmas season this year, so whether they are in the same boat or just super busy with life, I get it. Though I'm excited to see it, don't stress yourself over it. I'll still be excited whether I get it today or Jan 1 which is actually my birthday, so it would be a twofer present 