FIGGIN [Late Feb - March 19] "Phil had a dream" semi-megathread. -

chops

How many edged weapons do you see now?
kiwifarms.net
so many bad actors out here to do me serious harm in a college setting
What is this “bad actor” meme? Is it a SocJust twitter thing? I had never heard it in this context until Narcissa Wright’s recent meltdown.
 

Pocket Dragoon

For one-tenth a soul, or a sexual favor.
kiwifarms.net
Instead of spending the money he gets ebegging on pot and sleeping pills, shouldnt he be spending it on a doctor to fix that festering wound between his legs?
Not as long as his nethers are numb from all the sitting, patting, rubbing, and bouncing; along with a daily four-fingered heapin' helping of lidocaine & crotch cremes.

Methinks he's too dim to recognize and properly attribute the symptoms of systemic septicemia, and I doubt he'll voluntarily allow anyone other than his .gov-sponsored sawbones near that horrible gash.

Even if an unwary good-samaritan chanced upon Phil's collapsed mass & hauls that septic bulk directly to the best ER, his rate of survival will be minimal.

Even if he does, the fever will have cooked his grey matter & semi-solid intellect into mush. Phil really will become a leaky, baked potato.

Get ready with the forks, folks. This one's almost done.
 

mindlessobserver

kiwifarms.net
Confusion and impaired cognitive function are an indication the bacteria are already multiplying out of control and releasing toxins into the blood. It's hard to tell with some of these people if it's just their natural state or not. If he gets to the point where sepsis sets in death comes fast. Like in hours as the body literally explodes. Clots form everywhere, organs start to fail and the brain goes into shock. There is no real build up to it either. You get the early warning signs, and then its 0 to 60 in no time flat.

Maybe we should call for a health and welfare check on him at some point (after warning about the bat). Lord knows his twitter hug box wont do anything beyond cheer how brave he is.
 

StoicMoose

Such Strength! Such Courage! In the Name of Allah!
kiwifarms.net
I'm gonna be real, you don't need a ton of money to live a good life. Phil is in a position where he doesnt need to put much effort into supporting himself due to factors such as the state he lives in, the city he lives in, and the amount of cat ladies who work in the state bureaucracy who live to help tards like him. Phil lives in a city that's extremely accommodating of people who don't have a car, and he even has a fucking bike.

Phil's life is shit because he won't do any serious self reflection about his situation and how he got there, and what he can do moving forward. I don't even think it's because he's a spud with autism, it's because he's so fucking stupid he can't even realize that he's got it made. If it weren't for himself, he'd be living a good life rn. Instead he pushes people away, cuts off pieces of himself, and tries to associate with human garbage when he isn't immediately pushed away.
 

Ray Streip

kiwifarms.net
Claims to sleep with a baseball bat because bad dreams about the government coming after him/isn't even a blip on their radar because he hasn't technically done anything particularly of note

I mean, come on: what the fuck have you done, Landphil? "Being trans/giving yourself an imaginary antifa title" isn't going to make you a wanted man, you're insignificant to the system. You've broken no laws, you don't leave your apartment, you don't do shit; you're not worth their time.

Also, fun fact: weed has a habit of inhibiting the body's ability to dream, so all of the vivid details about these dreams in this pity-party all over Twitter don't even make sense. But then, you don't even smoke weed either so...
 

StoicMoose

Such Strength! Such Courage! In the Name of Allah!
kiwifarms.net
Bad actor is actually a legalistic term that literally just means criminal, wrong doer etc. Think of it as the opposite of upstanding citizen.

They use these words to try to sound smart, you see. Because nothing can ever be simple. You can't ever just say a plain word, you have to layer all your words under loads of bullshit to try to fit in with these people who seem to have new superfluous ideas and terms every week to add to their lexicon.
 
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Graffiti canvas

True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Instead of spending the money he gets ebegging on pot and sleeping pills, shouldnt he be spending it on a doctor to fix that festering wound between his legs?
Nah. It's Oregon. If your kid breaks an arm playing baseball, it's $3500 for a cast. If you're mentally ill and want your dick inverted into a flesh pocket for make believe, it's free.
 

Pocket Dragoon

For one-tenth a soul, or a sexual favor.
kiwifarms.net
Do you honestly believe Phil knows enough about drugs to know what plugging is? They don't talk about plugging in movies and TV shows, and that's where Phil gets most of his "knowledge".
No, but the internet will provide.

That, and the degeneracy of others.
 

The Dude

My dad says that's for pussies.
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
No, but the internet will provide.

That, and the degeneracy of others.
Phil has had the internet at his disposal to gather information and he has yet to use it. He won't even use it to help him make his lies more believable. What makes you think he's going to go looking for info on plugging?
 

Pocket Dragoon

For one-tenth a soul, or a sexual favor.
kiwifarms.net
Well, I'm not one to touch the white-poop, so.

But someone else might steer him in that direction. Give it time. Lulz will find a way.
 
  • Optimistic
Reactions: BlueArmedDevil

Pepito

Mod Edit: Malicious troll content removed.
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Phil has had the internet at his disposal to gather information and he has yet to use it. He won't even use it to help him make his lies more believable. What makes you think he's going to go looking for info on plugging?
To any individual with an inch of forehead "Plugging" should be fairly obvious. In any case, I'm with @Ray Streip in this one. He has done jack shit to appear into any law enforcement organization's radar. If anything, ANTIFA could maybe tell him to stop associating his crusty soiled ass with them but most of its members are also dumb mooks like him.
 

UselessRubberKeyboard

Mergin' n' spergin'
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
I'm hoping the proud boy/patriot prayer use our potato as the poster boy for all things ridiculous with the antfia movement.
I'm torn between wanting to see just how they'll mock him like the idiot he is, and hoping they don't because Phil would fucking love all the attention from his current 'enemies'. He'd be squealing all over twitter about his brave challenge and how proud boys hated trans latinx nonwhite moonwhale blahblahs.

Remember how proudly he oinked all over facebook when that terf lawyer Cathy somethingorother mentioned him on her blog? He was all up with the 'waited my whole life for this fight' kind of talk, and was obviously expecting to trade insults with her so he could get the masses on his side. She utterly ignored him from then onwards, and not one person gave him asspats for his brave (lol) challenge of her. Probably because the incident he was bragging about was a. having an obviously very vulnerable natal woman thrown out of a homeless shelter for giving him the side eye at a mirror, and b. a total lie and the hostel he said he was in wasn't even open at the time.

Phil's problem here is that he can't hide his long, inglorious career as the bottom feeder of lolcowdom. As soon as people look him up it becomes obvious he's an idiot - even his current twitter makes that clear. As much as it'd be hilarious for Phil to get the verbal slapdown he needs, it's not worth the proudboys' time. Why call out and mock an obviously exceptional individual? You only have to look at Phil and know he has learning disabilities, even with the face mask on. His tweets and other photos just make that clear. Phil trolls himself perfectly well already.

Edit: corrected the poorboys to proudboys. Early mornings and a youth spent lolling about in blues bars are bad for you, kids!
 
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