Legitimately Crazy/ Weird people you have met in real life? -

[Eryngium]

So I created this thread because I went to a party for this handicapped girl (like 2 years ago) who is a friend of the family and there was this old man there who was a friend of a friend or something, and everyone else thought he was hilarious and charming with the exception of a close relative of mine and myself, I got the weirdest fucking feeling off him that I can't describe it's like something was missing from his reactions, i'll never forget it (for example he brought a bunch of old Cd's he had and he wanted to show them to people and I made a joke about it and he didn't even react, he just gave me this weird pained smile and sort of shoved me out of the conversation).

Today I learned his granddaughter was just arrested for murder and is claiming she was sexually assaulted by a family member as a child, weird family.

 

[Okkervils]

Too many to count, honestly.

I knew a kid who during his stay in a psychiatric ward, was obsessed with the idea of sperm donation. He kept asking about it but besides that very bizarre interest he seemed relatively normal. This went on for awhile before he confessed that he was sure, absolutely positive, that his father had been sneaking into his room to steal his sperm to sell on the black-market. Furthermore, he later confessed he would get strange urges to follow women home and that he sometimes felt like hurting them. He was sectioned to a minimum of a six month stay by the courts after all that came out. Have no idea what happened to him.

Another lady I encountered would get extremely irate when the news was turned on in her ward. She thought Hillary Clinton wanted her to be assassinated. In retrospect, that may have not been that crazy.

I'm kind of cheating though, the notable ones I met were all inpatient, lol.

 

[eldri]

I was a friend to a woman who believed she was a contactee (as in contacted by aliens). She seemed reasonably intelligent so it left me a bit dumbfounded. But then after hearing about the emotional neglect with the men in her family as well as observing her and the men that she dated, it all made sense.

EDIT: Her boyfriend was also a nutter. He believed he was a calm collected movie version of a sociopath but, when you cleaned glass with windex, he would sperg out from the squeaking sound.

 

[und_doch_so_kalt]

I had a neighbor that used to snort 30 mg Adderall pills all night for days at a time and yell verses from the book of Revelations. She looked at me with the most deranged look and said she "takes Adderall to talk to Jesus" and said I was "demonic". Not sure how that crazy bitch got a doctor to give her 120 30 mg adderall tablets a month.

As I was moving, she whipped her window open and screamed, "How does it FEEEEEEL to get fucked by the devil you fucking faggot fuck!" My friends got awkwardly silent but I couldn't stop laughing. Funniest shit ever. I cackled like Hillary Clinton for at least 5 minutes.

 

[NOT Sword Fighter Super]

I was at the car wash the other day using the vacuums, when I noticed this guy in the spot next to me seemingly having an argument with somebody.

I quickly realized; however, that no headset is good enough to be able to block out the sound of the noisy vacuum. He was having a very vocal argument with himself.

I'm usually very entertained by people like this, but this dude was giving me a bad vibe. I finished up early and took off.

 

[PT 522]

Can't describe too much the location and circumstances this happened, but there's a girl I know who is probably severely autistic.

Naturally I try to avoid her but the one time we were forced to talk she had asked me a question and I had earbuds in, and upon taking them out the first thing I hear is her yelling "LOOK AT ME WHEN I TALK TO YOU".

She also frequently addresses the entire group of people we're in to go on long rambles about "I like to draw German Shepherds... shading is hard but I just draw what my body tells me to..." one time just before a weekend she yelled with great pride that she gets to watch a dog getting neutered over the break.

(E to remove more specific situations/PL)

 

[SpessCaptain]

So there was this woman in one of the courses I did and she was like.. normal at first, had a job in real estate, had 2 kids, but she had no other female friends. So I sat down and spoke with her and we hit off pretty well, it helps that I'm a natural when it comes to building rapports and stuff and she became really open about her ex and complained about him a lot.

Now here's when things got really weird, she said she had an Ex living in my suburb and I asked which street because he sounded like a fucked up individual that I should avoid. Well she said my street, and I pressed on for more information.... Then she tells me my number and I realise her ex lives in my apartment block and stole from the underground garages a year ago. Holy fuck talk about small world.

Anyway this is when things get fucky. So I'm learning more about her and this is when I confirmed she was crazy: She got her children taken off of her through child services, dying from oviarian cancer, had several STIs and infections. She had these grandiose ideas she was being constantly stalked by her ex and he had a hitman after her and how I was going to be a target. I immediately snapped that chain of thoughts of sparking a friendship and tried to back away from the situation politely, I got super uncomfortable and stopped talking to her.

She rang me up during the night a few days alter crying that her landlord was going to kick her out cause her new boyfriend had broken up with her and she wouldn't leave his home, he was some autistic idiot who played his cards well and cheated on her constantly and the woman was completely toned out her own independence and she just kept bringing him back. I said fuck it I'm not apart of this and she lost her shit, the next day at the course she was there for 2 hrs, begging at my teacher to dismiss her early so she could go to a refuge and saying that she was being followed and her life was in danger.

I was so fucking thankful I was forceful enough to get myself uninvolved.

All in all, don't make friends with crazy indian chicks.

 

[nagant 1895]

There's a unique simi-homeless man who rides his bike around where I work offering to sweep, rake leaves or other assorted odd jobs in exchange for petty cash, in bad weather he begs. But no matter what will not accept nickels or quarters. He lives in an abandoned camper trailer that he dragged into the woods owned by and adjacent to the railroad tracks. He makes his own batteries and electronics out of garbage and donations and his bicycle also doubles as a foot powered generator.

I humor him mostly because he isn't on drugs and out of Christian charity but also because he's a great source of local gossip. He's predicted several upcoming divorces and identified a few corrupt LEOs by name. He also let's me know how things look at other local shops (busy? slow? high prices? etc...)

I knew him for years and he always wears his bicycle helemt, so one day I ask him "Hey joe, why you always wearin that helmet even on foot?" he looked around and insisted we move into the shade before taking it off and revealing a skullcap made of tinfoil and screendoor mesh. For the next 30 minutes he explained that he knows it doesn't block radio waves and infact amplifies them which is what he wants because it lets him turn the tables on the government by spying on their communications. The no nickles and quarters thing is because they're big enough to hold the transmitters and electronic warfare chips. The moving in to the shade thing is because they hide low orbit spy satellites in light of the sun so that he can't see them.

 

[Count groudon]

EDIT: Her boyfriend was also a nutter. He believed he was a calm collected movie version of a sociopath but, when you cleaned glass with windex, he would sperg out from the squeaking sound.

Aw, I’m glad Connor finally found love.


Craziest dude I’ve met lately has to be this dude that everyone calls “ eagle.” Now you may be wondering where this man earned his moniker, we’ll get to that in a minute. First I’d like to give you a description of this majestic creature. Eagle is a significantly overweight, balding, greasy man who’s sense of fashion can only be described as leather and lace gay cowboy. He dresses almost exclusively in faux reptile skin outfits, with gator skin boots, snakeskin pants held up with a snakeskin belt, a perpetually open snakeskin vest being the only thing covering his gracefully jiggling moobs most of the time in both summer and winter, and all of this topped off with a ratty black Stetson hat with a feather in the band. Aside from this, Eagle is also notable for being one of the biggest junkies in my hometown, nearly always tripping balls on something, and he’s been banned from most of the stores in his neighborhood for attempting to buy bizarre clusters of items such as several plungers at a single time, rope, entire cases of energy drinks, and random gift cards for seemingly no particular occasion in mind with dollar bills caked in cocaine. This habit also the source of his nickname, because 95% of the time whenever this man is high he starts to wander around aimlessly flapping his arms like wings and loudly cawing at the top of his lungs. It’s so common in fact that nobody in his neighborhood bats an eye whenever they see him running up and down the streets seemingly trying to soar through the air. He’s even been hit by cars several times doing this, but luckily the cars always manage to see him in time and manage to slow down just enough just to stop themselves from killing the little tard.

Despite all this he’s actually s fairly nice guy with a sober wife and two very bright kids. I honestlyhave no idea how he’s managed to keep such a nice family with the way he acts, but they all seem pretty happy together.

 

[Botched Tit Job]

I take public transport basically daily. Crazy people are a way of life.

My recent favorite was a dude who was standing way too fucking close to me, was muttering to himself, followed me onto the bus, and sat near me. Proceeded to twitch all over the place and his body was surging and flopping just enough that I had no idea if it was a medical thing or a drug thing. My suspicion is drugs. I ended up telling the bus driver and then bailing at the next stop when she stopped to check on him because fuuuuck that.

There was also a guy once with no shoes on who kept wandering back and forth the block behind the bus stop, keeping his eyes on some poor high school girl that he kept passing. He kept it up long enough that I squished myself over and told her to come sit next to me. The second she did, he booked it.

Taking public transport really helps you learn to suss out the malicious crazies from the benign crazies.

 

[PT 940]

I knew a woman through my social circle who ended up being a pedophile and is in prison now. She was beating and molesting her children, who were born with physical problems. Meaning, they kept ending up in the hospital because of her abuse but people thought it was just because of their disabilities. She was only able to cover it up for so long and ended up turning herself in to the cops. It was bizarre because she was well-respected. She even had me over to her house a few times for the kid I was babysitting to play with her kids and I noticed some really "off " things at the time but had no idea it was that. She seemed to have problems with anger that only came out in private. In the social setting we were typically in there were always a lot of people around and it wasn't noticeable.

Met a guy a few years ago who had schizophrenia and told me he was 2,000 years old.

 

[Francis E. Dec Esc.]

My boss' secretary always seemed kind of off to me, and about five years after the company closed down she murdered her boyfriend and shot herself.

PD: Rowlett Couple Died In Murder-Suicide

Police say a Rowlett couple found deceased in their home died in an apparent murder-suicide.

dfw.cbslocal.com

 

[PT 940]

When I worked in the call center a mentally ill woman called needing help with something that had nothing to do with the job I did so I gave her info about where she could call to get the help she needed. She was super nice but she started talking about how someone was in her room stealing her jewelry. I said she should call the cops but she said, "They stopped coming. I call and call but my relatives keep getting in, taking my jewelry. When I get there they have already snuck out. I talk to them and tell them I know they are there but they won't leave." A similar thing happened to my aunt before she was put into a nursing home so I just kept talking to her about it, hoping I gave her some comfort.

Another lady who called in said she used to work for a secret branch of the US government and that she had attended secret government autopsies in a secret lab located in the Washington Monument. She said they kept bodies in zync-lined coffins. I don't remember what her issue was but we talked for about an hour, I didn't even attempt to end the call because she was so interesting to talk to. She kept saying, "I shouldn't be talking about this."

 

[Smaug's Smokey Hole]

I met Anders Behring Breivik in a waiting room in Oslo. The real Breivik, not the impostor that had shot a bunch of people a couple of weeks earlier, the details of how he was real and the killer wasn't was explained at length but it was years ago and so ramshackle that it didn't stick in my mind. The guy seemed really bummed out that someone would tarnish him like that and that the media went along with it. He was clearly nuttier than squirrel balls but didn't seem dangerous, aggressive or violent, he was just sad and wanted to tell someone about it.

At the same time he oozed insanity in a way that no other crazy person I've met have been able to come close to, like reality warped around him and I immediately felt that something was weird when I entered that room. So I kept my distance because he might shank me in the neck with a pen without realizing until afterwards.

On a lighter note, a friend knew an old hippie that fried his brain on psychadelics that didn't believe in construction cranes above a certain size. To build a big crane you need a bigger crane, so the biggest crane in existence has to have been built by an even bigger crane, and that crane had to have been built by... it was all a scam.

 

[Womanhorse]

My friend's mother is easily the battiest bitch I've had the displeasure of knowing. Super Christian, paranoid and distrustful distrustful of anyone that isnt her or my friend. Her husband left her when my buddy was really young and I think she may also be schizophrenic but she's never been formally diagnosed (and I don't wanna really interact with her to find out of thats happened). But basically, she keeps her adult daughter as a sort of hostage in her house and controls everybit of her life because of the off chance she might denounce Jesus and become corrupted by sinners. I wish it was a joke.

Spoiler: Details

Basically she has total control over her kid and isolates them from everyone. No one is ever allowed to their house, and no one can leave unless its with herself. She wont leave her alone in this house either, unless its to sleep. But she'll randomly come into her room during the night to make sure she's still there or to talk about god or whatever. Whenever we voice chat she has to be in the same room and will blare some loud christain serman in the background or the news. Occasionally you can hear her screaming about "the niggers and the gays" or just satan corrupting the youth, followed by her asking her kid if she wants a snack or just trying to banter over me in general. Im glad she doesnt understand how text messages work, because thats the only way we can really stay in contact and they can get away from this woman. This has also been going on for as long as I've know my friend (Grade 9) and probably longer.
Notable things she's done include:

• Taking her kid out of highschool during lunch hours so she can't interact with other kids. This was literally every school day btw
• Calling a teacher up to claim we were threatening to murder her and her kid because we stayed after school for an hour.
• Cutting off communication between us after HS. My friend managed to run away at some point and we reconnected
• Hiring a private investigator to find her after she left, and driving for literally 3 days to pick her up. Should mention she was 18 at the time of this
• Sitting outside of a halloween party we were all at for 4 hours to make sure no one was drinking or smoking and having a good Christain Party.
• Screwing me and a few other friends out of $200 because she couldnt be in our hotel room during a convention, and instead renting a room at a fucking high end hotel up the street instead. Decided to let us know this the day before the reservation started and threatened to kick her kid out if she stayed in our room
• Also followed her kid around for the entirety of said convention like a chaperone. This includes the bathroom and literally everywhere else
• She really hates me for whatever reason, and will not hesitate let me know. Usually by screaming about me during calls or something. Im assuming its because she thinks Im might turn her daughter gay or steal her or something. Even during that con, she would whisk her away from my dealers table whenever they walked by and wouldnt let her so much as wave at me

I could go on, but I think you get the idea. My friend is in her mid 20's now (the con and party i mentioned happened very recently), and because her mom also happens to be rich of inheritance she can't even go get a job to try and get away from her. We both joke about the absurdity of it to try and cope, but they're literally a forced basement dweller.

I cant see her finding this post either since she can barely send a fucking email without assistance, so Im not worried about any repercussions from sharing it. Friend is aware of me sharing it too.

 

[King Mob]

Dude I see around the block sometimes. He's schizophrenic. Thinks he's saved the world at least 3x. One from god's wrath, one from an alien invasion, and.... Well, I can't remember the 3rd time; something to do with god, likely.

Another guy around the area. He could be another schizo, but it's also possible that he's just done too many drugs and fried his brain. anyways, he believes he's being 'gang-stalked' (If you've never heard of it, look it up. It's... funny sad.) AND he believes in Reptilians. The Queen's one. The Prime Minister's one. The church leaders, the people gang-stalking him.

My ex was a lapsed Christian, but he still prayed. Also a heroin addict. He firmly believed that if/when he was out of money and couldn't get a cuff, that if he prayed to god, god would answer his prayers and he'd either come in to money or some tar. He really, really believed that because he 'needed' it, that god wanted him to be able to get high; or at least well. He' since 100% renounced god and Catholicism. He attributes/blames it on me. Oops.

I know a lot of weird damn people...

 

[Tootsie Bear]

Back when I was a teenager I was a stoner who was desperately trying to quit, usually being guilt trip into smoking with people who I thought were my friends.. Thankfully I did finally quit cold turkey but I do recall a funny story involving two brain fried idiots, one white and one black, before I did quit.

I have always enjoyed getting out of the house and hated being stuck inside when it was raining non stop. So taking advantage of a nice sunny day I went for my typical bike ride at the park. I usually like to ride my bike while listing to my Ipod until I decided to go home. This was my time for myself and not to entertain anyone else. Unfortunately on this day I crossed paths with two brain dead douchebags who asked if I had any weed. After politely replying "no" the white kid cussed me out. I was like "fuck you!" and continued riding. But less then half hour later we cross paths again and, believe it or not, they didn't remember we just spoke! They asked if I had any weed and not wanting to argue again, I finally confessed I knew someone who dealt weed who lived up the street.

After meeting up with the dealer, we agreed to kick back. This was recently after the Virginia Tech massacre happened, so the news was airing the shooter's video diaries and showing the images were he posed with guns. I remember the white kid was amazed by the one where he held the guns in both hands in the image and thought it was "cool." He was rightfully called a dumb ass for which he was being. Thankfully poetic justice happened in the funniest way. While smoking, the dealers pit bull took a dump on the floor and the same guy stepped it unknowingly. It didn't take long for the dealer's younger brother to point it out by saying, "damn nigga, you just stepped in dog shit!" We all died laughing and I decided to split as I was getting bored. All in all it was a good day.

 

[TowinKarz]

The delivery driver for the local Mom n' Pop Italian place, he's courteous, quick, and completely out of his mind on conspiracy theories. Typical interaction with him:

"$15.99"

"Here's a twenty, keep the change"

"Thanks! Have a nice night! Oh, and be sure to stock up on water and unplug your computer later this week, there's a big cosmic storm gonna hit, Sun's about to release all it's EMP at once, it'll fry everything electronic and the world's gonna be plunged into chaos, so be ready! The won't talk about it on the news, but I saw it on YouTube, be ready!"

"Okay, thanks..... I guess"

 

[Sm0kINHaZefEEliNBlaZEd]

Here's a blog post for you. I shared a house with four other people several years ago, a place that rather quickly turned into a heroin den. So for a year and a half I lived with and met some of the craziest fuckers I'll ever see.

I had three addict roomies.

Roommate "B": B was a shithead, a 35 year old punk rocker. Absolutely desired to be Kurt Cobain so he got addicted to heroin early and suffered from a bit of arrested development. Maintain a state of political wokeness akin to your 13 year old cousin. Got off probation a couple months into his stay and quickly proceeded to get kicked out of three bars and got ktfo at the fourth. Would often get jumped despite being 6'5 because he was a pussy. Shit physical health from drug abuse/general dirtiness. Took one shower that I ever knew of and pissed in bottles despite a toilet being 15ft away. Millionaire. Filthy fucking rich thanks to his parents. So rich that he bought had a man servant, a fellow junkie who had a legit neck beard and wore a pork pie hat (Walter White). This guy would run all his errands while B sat in his room to 'watch his programs' and piss in bottles. In exchange, B paid for all his drugs and shit and let him sleep on his floor.(Neckbeard was a weirdo himself, he never spoke a word to anyone and that's not hyperbole) The only other times people hang around is when B is paying for everything.

Roommate "N": Legitimately a nice guy who made some of the most retarded decisions I've ever seen. Had the chance to go to college but said fuck it and went all in on the rave scene in the 2000's. Get's addicted after that scene goes bust; but when he wasn't in jail he tended to maintain employment. That is until a few months after moving in. N gets fired but decides to go on unemployment and get clean. He goes to the clinic and this dude "kicks down" this chick to N, warning him she's nuts. N proceeds to make this bitch his girlfriend and secretly moves her into the house. "K" (N's bitch) was a 36 year old grandmother and junkie trash, complete with methmouth. Such a heavy user that her life was practically a fight against gravity. This obviously leads N to the rational decision to start using again. So in order to support this leach and his old habit N started dealing, selling klonopin and mids in the hood. Of course, his ass gets robbed multiple times (someone legit Suge Knighted his ass once) but apparently still turned a profit. Last time I saw him, he was trying to move several lbs of mids that were fronted to him by his old jail buddy. And apparently, his jail buddy was fronting them for some cartel...

Roommate "J": Female cokewhore. Mom was a crackhead and dad is unknown so issues aplenty. Peaked at 18, progressively has gotten worse throughout the years. Would have coke parties by herself every Monday night. Sad, sad parties. Total whore. Didn't count how many guys she fucked but it was a lot. Wanted to straighten up, so she got a dog. The dog just ended up staying in a cage as she solidered on. Had a boyfriend move in once. In the span of several months he gained 75lbs due to a coke raddled NEEThog lifestyle.

And there were quite a few ancillary characters and stories of note too. From the nog coke dealer who tried to sell us sizzurrup by labeling it as "the new crack" and would question whether or not J was pregnant ("Cuz I can't be sellin to no pregnant chicks"), to B's "friend" who would peruse the craigslist m4m section as if it was a free Airbnb. And I can't forget when N brought back a hooker who then proceeded to lose her mind. Shit was crazy.

 

[PT 522]

This is short and minor but I have no friends to tell about this so fuck you.

While at the grocery store the other day I encountered a very androgynous person (actually androgynous, not tumblr androgynous), but I think it was a girl. She had a triangle of hair on her head with the point centered on the forehead, everything else was shaved off.

When she asked what I was making for dinner based on my ingredients and I answered [artichaut et vinaigrette à la française] she said "Oh. There's nothing wrong with that."

Hey, I thought it was weird.