"Life, Love, and the Known Unknowns" - Ralph's article honoring his dying mother

[donjulio]

I think everyone could have predicted either an insanely quick or very slow death for any member of the Ralph clan in the end. But hey It’s great to see that ethan loves his mother so much that he can get his shit together and get a real job to better their situation at least be soberish enough to figure out how to milk the impending death of his 2nd parent.

losing a parent always sucks, more if it is the one you were closest to, but this guy is only interested in maintaining his self destructive bullshit with the least amount of effort. He never really gave a shit, else they wouldn’t be in this situation to begin with.

but at least momma Ralph gave us the gift that is Ethan. Though at the same time she has also cursed the world with the gunt. I guess The only real winners here are the liquor industry and whoever makes those burger sliders he likes so much.

 

[Takayuki Yagami]

In Memoriam: Ronnie Ralph

If you're a fan of unnecessary commas and ideas laid out in the shortest sentences possible this is the article for you. Actual excerpt below:

Why is “As for the detractors” its own sentence? It’s modifying the statement that comes directly after. There should be a comma there with the “well” taken out. Do most polisci not make you do a lot of writing? The one I took as an elective did. How is he this much of a chore to read?

 

[Lore Master]

Why is “As for the detractors” its own sentence? It’s modifying the statement that comes directly after. There should be a comma there with the “well” taken out. Do most polisci not make you do a lot of writing? The one I took as an elective did. How is he this much of a chore to read?

Isn't that the phrase world famous lolcow DSP uses to talk about his "ALAWGS". You can't make this up for no matter how pathetic it gets.

 

[Paddy O' Furniture]

Why is “As for the detractors” its own sentence? It’s modifying the statement that comes directly after. There should be a comma there with the “well” taken out. Do most polisci not make you do a lot of writing? The one I took as an elective did. How is he this much of a chore to read?

He went to school for polisci, not gooder writing. The man can only handle so much at once, have you seen his skull shape?

 

[RichardRApe]

Why is “As for the detractors” its own sentence? It’s modifying the statement that comes directly after. There should be a comma there with the “well” taken out. Do most polisci not make you do a lot of writing? The one I took as an elective did. How is he this much of a chore to read?

Ralph is a terrible writer in style, structure, content and as matter of fact. Look at this train wreck in the Ronnie Ralph article for example:

I feel like I’m meandering a bit, but I can’t help myself. It’s sort of hard to put his influence into words. He wasn’t perfect by any means, and I’m not either. So, I don’t want this to come across as some sort of hagiography. When I sit and take stock of my life, however, I have to say that a lot of it came from him.

No, he's not meandering at all. You can tell he threw that word in there to sound smarter than he is -- and I bet he catches those 3 fans of his off-guard who buy it -- but it's an incorrect and completely out of place word. The word he was looking for was rambling. If he proof-read his work and used a dictionary he'd know that.

Then there's the sweet prize: hagiography. Hey buddy, I'm just talking about my drunk, dead-beat, abusive, secretly cock-sucking, nigger-loving Dad: I DON'T WANT TO BE ACCUSED OF WRITING A HAGIOGRAPHY OR SOMETHING.

He literally follows that sentence up with he takes after his Dad. You know, Ethan Ralph the living saint...

 

[ScamL Likely]

Considering how little writing he does and how wetbrained he must be by now, it's a miracle when he can even string a half-coherent sentence together. It takes a lot of practice to pick up on retarded stylistic quirks like overuse of commas or repeating certain words too many times in one's own writing. That and I'd assume he never proofreads/edits his drafts or has anyone who knows what they're doing look over them.

 

[#KillAllPedos]

Just found out about this. I would feel bad making a joke about Ethan’s dying mother, even if her parenting ultimately helped make Ethan into the scumbag he is today. So I’ll refrain.

But real talk, this must be like the best thing that’s happened to her in 30-some years. She gets to be free of Ethan Ralph. No more listening to him brag about his internet hustle. No more nagging him for help getting to dialysis appointments. No more having to see his fat misshapen body every day as a reminder of the worst decision she ever made. I’m happy for her. I wish her the best on her journey to that dialysis appointment in the sky.

 

[Vetti]

Just found out about this. I would feel bad making a joke about Ethan’s dying mother, even if her parenting ultimately helped make Ethan into the scumbag he is today. So I’ll refrain.

But real talk, this must be like the best thing that’s happened to her in 30-some years. She gets to be free of Ethan Ralph. No more listening to him brag about his internet hustle. No more nagging him for help getting to dialysis appointments. No more having to see his fat misshapen body every day as a reminder of the worst decision she ever made. I’m happy for her. I wish her the best on her journey to that dialysis appointment in the sky.

You should sentence mix Ralph delivering Sandra's eulogy.

 

[Love_Machine011]

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[Fslur]

Ralph must be close to his Mom, and considering how close he was to his dad , this must be hitting pretty hard for him. Actually feel for him on this, hope she wakes up and is able to pull through for a while. But from how he has been sounding talking about it for the past while, it almost seems like he expected it. Sucks losing a family member.

Yeah he was so close to her the hospital was trying to get custody because her bills weren’t being paid. Whilst he was simultaneously screaming at anons that he’s rich.. So close..

I am glad she isn’t suffering anymore. It’s extremely clear that he didn’t care. He doesn’t take care of himself let alone her.

 

[Takayuki Yagami]

Rip

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I’d say he has my condolences, but I know he’s going to do something vile in the wake of this. Wiggers gonna wig. Xander is due in a month or so too, isn’t he?

 

[Insane In The Membrane]

The Demon Baby is due in a matter of days.

 

[MeltyTW]

The Demon Baby is due in a matter of days.

life force sapped from sandra to help feed the devil child. destroyer of worlds, devourer of life.

 

[4str4staleatherbelt]

Yeah he was so close to her the hospital was trying to get custody because her bills weren’t being paid. Whilst he was simultaneously screaming at anons that he’s rich.. So close..

Where are you getting this info? According to Ralph the first (or second, not sure) hospital wanted to take her out to make room for other patients. If Ralph disagreed the hospital threatened to take guardianship of her and they even called Sandra's friend about the issue. Taking her to a private hospital would've, allegedly, costed half a million a year.

 

[Sam Losco]

Where are you getting this info? According to Ralph the first (or second, not sure) hospital wanted to take her out to make room for other patients. If Ralph disagreed the hospital threatened to take guardianship of her and they even called Sandra's friend about the issue. Taking her to a private hospital would've, allegedly, costed half a million a year.

It was in one of @PhoBingas's recaps: https://kiwifarms.net/goto/post?id=8903386

• Ralph bitches about the medicare issue. It was costing the government 2600$ a day to keep Sandra in the hospital. He told them he wasn't going to pay 2600$ a month to the hospital and the hospital threatened to sue for guardianship of Sandra.

 

[Shiggy Diggster]

If I was a hospital administrator there's no way in hell I'd let the woman whose head injury is obviously and totally the fault of my employees be shipped off anywhere. I would be sucking Ethan's micropenis and telling him how pretty it is because I wouldn't want him to win the entire hospital in a lawsuit. That they weren't doing all they could to please Gunt makes me suspicious of Ralph's version of the story

 

[AnOminous]

Ralph has nothing but my sympathy in this moment. Tomorrow, we'll be back to having fun.

 

[Chive Turkey]

It’s a heart-wrenching affair that I literally would not wish on my worst enemy.

You did though, multiple times, not even "worst enemies" but people who slightly inconvenienced your e-life.

That having been said, the death of hos moms is severely fucked up if what he said is even remotely true.

 

[4str4staleatherbelt]

It was in one of @PhoBingas's recaps: https://kiwifarms.net/goto/post?id=8903386

• Ralph bitches about the medicare issue. It was costing the government 2600$ a day to keep Sandra in the hospital. He told them he wasn't going to pay 2600$ a month to the hospital and the hospital threatened to sue for guardianship of Sandra.

I gave this a relisten and medicare stopped paying and because of this the hospital wanted 2600/day (around a million a year) or they would make room for someone else that who would pay or who the hospital could leech government (medicare) cash from. It's not that the bills weren't being paid it's that medicare stopped paying. Perhaps the medicare system was fine with paying for Mama Ralph's cheaper, downgraded care at the other facilities? I can't say, but Ralph's always branded himself as "hood rich" not some big baller millionaire.

 

[Spicboyskafan]

The Demon Baby is due in a matter of days.

God have mercy on us all