A kilt is actually a highly manly item of clothing. It was invented by one Hamish McThundercock (also known as “Bonnie Prince Chadlie”) in the 12th century. The problem McThundercock faced was that when he’d done fighting wolves, tossing cabers and punching Sassenachs, women would inevitably feel compelled to throw themselves upon him, and the time lost in taking his trousers off was unacceptable to him. The kilt enabled quick access to his mighty genitals. McThundercock is also credited with the discovery of the multiple orgasm.