LIVING MY BEST LIFE 10/24/2019 -

  • The End of Proving Grounds: (Thread) (Update) (Last Call in PG)
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Piggy Pot Pie

ham hoof hotdish
kiwifarms.net
Extra D&D weight is burning out that poor Hyundai’s motor. Wom*mart auto center taking off their “pride” bumper magnet is the hysterical. They took one look at AL&B and thought, “Nothing to be proud of” *peel*

In the store she was “testing couches cuz that’s how I roll apparently” and definitely NOT just sitting down because fat.
 

xenomorph

I've got more demons where that came from.
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Why is that Dana faced goblina child around so often? Does her mother go on meth binges or some shit?

I bet Dana is just luveen these leftovers, leftover sped gorlfriend, leftover perfume, leftover niece, leftover tarps.

I bet Dana LOVES the fact that this little kid is gonna gravitate to AL now since she is Mrs Claus everytime she sees her. Classic move
 

WeDon'tNeedToWhisper

Reservation for one at Yamatos
kiwifarms.net
Imagine being an adult and living in the real world and this happening to you early in the morning before work (when Amber's going to sleep) and not when you're on your way to a fucking arcade. How dare a car, that she's put massive strain on, inconvenience her like that.
More time at Autozone=less time with Dusty :mad:
Screen Shot 2019-10-24 at 9.25.22 AM.png

edit: did not proofread, apparently.
 
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Cuck Duck

Ducky Mo Ducky Momo, he's your very best friend!
kiwifarms.net
Can we just appreciate how based on the thumbnail she makes it look like she actually does stuff

She's never been living her best life. Even as a kid, she was dealt a shitty hand. She could change now that she's independent with a pretty good income and people that want her to succeed (even if it's tough love) but I guess she likes living this way or is in a preteen mindset like someone else said. So by her standards, I guess not having to listen to anyone is the best, even if it means making dumb choices. Did she ever really get to have that before? A rebellious teenager phase?
 

Diet Coke 4 Life

When I peek, it is in the line of duty.
kiwifarms.net
Pass me a beer.

No intro? Huzzah!

0:07 “It seems like it’s a ritual to start my blog out here” No, not really. It’s just that you’ve decided that since fall has hit and your blubber insulates you from any child in the air, that going outside might be somewhat tolerable. And your eyeshadow looks like wonky shit without eyebrows done.
0:23 Bitches for some time about how the sun is making her red and the ‘sun is hot’ and “at least we know the sun is working today! *tee hee*” That’s not how it works, Amber.
0:37 Says they’re going to the arcade. Mentions that she, Erik and Becky went the other day and it was fun. Hrm.
0:50 the poor car is grinding its way down the road, no one in the back seat. Amber talks about how Becky got her oil changed today. TMI.
1:09 Sorry, she’s talking about how they just got an oil change at Walmart and how they’ve never had engine problems before before Amber says “it’s just a coincidence she’s DROVEN-“ and I pause so I can scream how DROVEN ISN’T A FUCKING WORD.
1:10 I’m finishing my autistic screeching about her lack of ability when it comes to speaking her only language with anything resembling proficiency. Sorry.
1:25 So they got a check engine light. Returned to Walmart where they checked it and have no idea why it came in, aka: they did their damned job. Amber’s all huffy as she says “Why am I not surprised?” when it comes to them not knowing why it came in after an oil change. Shut up, you dumb bitch. You don’t know what it’s in for either. It could be that you’ve finally ground a hole into your exhaust due to bottoming out that poor Hyundai over ever crack in the tarmac and you’re getting improper oxygen indications.
1:48 Bitching about how they have to go to Autozone to have it read.
2:15 So it’s in because their air filter is clogged. Of course they’d never had it replaced. Because they’re fucking incompetent, and the lowest-priced oil replacement service at Walmart doesn’t include inspection of filters and replacements. The car nerd in me is frothing in rage. But hey, Destiny spotted with the little kid.
2:58 Destiny giving Amber car advise - “I just have them tell me what’s wrong and then have them replace it. Like they do my windshield wiper blades and my filters and everything.” This, ladies and gents, is the type of customer that makes mechanic scammers so fucking successful. Clueless, gullible and dumb as a box of rocks.
3:10 Opening on food at the arcade. Then them playing games. Four lesbos and the niece.
4:08 So they came away with a goodly number of tickets and got Gracie all the cheap plastic garbage they could. Because quantity, not quality folks.
4:45 They went the next day AGAIN. This time they got Gracie a huge rainbow unicorn. And they had Rickie and Erik with them that time.
5:08 Blaming Walmart for taking off their pride magnet on their car. Because they’re in a small, rural town. Guaranteed Walmart employees don’t give enough of a shit to bother with it.
6:13 AOn a couch. Ugly green couch in the Goodwill. Says she’s testing out couches because that’s how she rolls. Aka: she couldn’t walk around the Goodwill and instead plunked her fat ass down to rest.
7:00 And it’s going to be movie night. Whatever.
7:35 Next day, in bed, still the same fucking makeup she had on before. Says she didn’t sleep and it was just a nap. Still, she went to bed with a face of makeup on. Disgusting. More styes incoming.
8:40 COMMENT OF THE DAY IS BACK. Because she needed something to pad this shit out. Stop bullshitting that it’s because people like it. It’s because you need that youtube money.
Off of the fall video.

Diallo Djénéba: She is getting bigger and bigger
Amber says these comments make her laugh because she sees the more when she’s losing weight, then goes blathering about delusions. She professes she’s currently losing weight (insert *bitch where?* here). Cuntylynn grumbles that this is pure delusion because she is losing weight, damn it.

Jaym Quincy: You really need to be careful girl!! Love you, hope you don’t have any lasting injuries!!!
Amber professes she’s been contacted by many you tubers and fans asking if she’s okay and says she’s fine. Says she never falls even though others trip and fall all the time. Then talks about when she has fallen before.

Ryell Gear: Voice of Reason can’t people have empathy for other people and not just hamberlynn?
Amber goes ‘nope, reply, skip’

Tatiana Pierce: @Cake Baby It definitely is because the only who defend Amberlynn AKA YOU are accounts with no profile pictures, likes, favorites, etc., so you can give it up already. If you’re going to address “haters” be an adult and do it through your real account.
SKIP

Cherokee Girl: Sorry to hear, but bright side, you’re not 600 elbees.
Amber goes “I mean, that’s always a good thing, right, but there’s no victory in that.” Whines about her weight.

Sneha Deodhar: Lmao this feels like I’m watching my 600lbs life
Amber confesses that there are some similarities.

your mom: Lori darling where are your clothes
SKIP

Ben Thompson: This is so sad. She doesn’t realize we want her to get healthier! Not hating!!!
Amber professes thanks for the well wishes.


With that shit over, she blathers for a bit and does her exceptional kiss shit.
 

hamburgerlardraid

spinnage sodiums
kiwifarms.net
i know im not the only one who thinks it is super weird that AL is spoiling that child ugh
It makes sense that she is treating Gracie as her child, because raising a child of your own requires: responsibility, commitment, and effort on your part. Don't forget living, all of which Amber is incapable of doing (for much longer). As a surrogate auntie/chequing account, all she has to do is shower the poor child with gifts and fake affection to feel the satisfaction of being her "mother".
 

Punkinsplice

My dog and I talk shit about you
kiwifarms.net
i know im not the only one who thinks it is super weird that AL is spoiling that child ugh
Nope, she does it because kids are easily won over with presents and attention. She has a selfish motive behind everything, but the poor girl will not likely figure it out until later in therapy. She will recall the weird smelly fat woman who payed way too much attention to her and cringe. I hope Amber is not around her enough to make her fat.
 
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