True & Honest Fan
Person of Interest
- May 9, 2016
As I understand it, a young , non-white gay man with a tranny fetish who calls himself
"chimp burgers" was searching you tube for "gender dysphoria" and discovered my videos talking about it. Then the Kiwi Farms truscums , particularly feline darkmage, dee price and jennfer ajay, started declaring that I was a "fake tranny" and "trans trender".
I woke up to this utterly false assumption by Dee Price this morning and changed my mind about not starting any threads in this forum. :
LOL Y2K Funny part is tommy does not get how it feels and without the female brain can not really get that feeling of looking in the mirror and seeing that staring back. Fighting all that time most of the time being so small well it is not really fair two adults against one small child. and add the sister in after that then well. you do not have much and well you are really alone.
These are the facts. Any comments I may have made in the past that make them think otherwise, are just comments i made in the past and say nothing about the whole of my life.
I was born with an intersex condition, possibly due to in utero DES exposure, and subjected to genital surgery when I was very young, leaving me with typical, working male gonads (no. i do not have a micropenis) . I didn't know I wasn't supposed to be a girl until my sister's first birthday when I thought my hair was getting curled and my cousin's pink dress to wear. Instead, my head got shaved and i got dressed in a silly blue sailor suit. I don't think I stopped crying every time i got a buzz cut until i was about 8 and was used to playing boy. Also, the Beatles had come along, so they let me grow it a little longer and didn't make me shave it all off any more.
By then, I had learned about Christine Jorgensen and knew what was going on with me. I had to suppress innate feminine movement, posturing and speech to pass as a straight male. I walked pigeon toed for months when I was a freshman in high school so i didn't swish my hips when i walked because the bullies were kicking me for it. Gym locker rooms were a fucking nightmare because my body was feminine. all the jocks wanted to fuck me , beat me or both.
When I complained that I was a girl when i was little, my parents insisted that girls didn't have penises and boys only cry when they bleed and if I needed anything to cry about, they'd be glad to beat the crap out of me. Not wanting to get hit, I shut up and played along as best I could. Unlike Dee, my father only beat me twice for crossdressing and we've managed to make peace in his old age. Mostly I just got spanked for being rebellious, though it got pretty hairy in my teens.
As an aside, because of the punishment, I never lived in the closet; only in my head. It was an all or nothing at all thing for me. I tried in 1986, 1997, 1999 and 2010 before finally being able to just shave off the beard and not look back.
They still fight with their father. Unlike many of my siblings, I never accepted what I was being told about not being female and never tried to deny my nature. I also never married or bred, so i had none of that baggage when i was finally able to start living authentically in 2014 after numerous failed attempts to do so since 1985.
My brain has never been able to visualize myself with a penis. The sensory input from the penis when the brain is looking for a vagina is maddening. That is what makes GD so mentally crippling and why transsexuals are compelled to get GRS. The nerve endings are in the wrong place. One of my friends who recently had bottom surgery was amazed at how right everything felt and how she was able to clench her new vagina.
If not for spirit promising me healing if i just suffered my way through it and delivered myself intact on the last day, I would have had the surgery long ago. I don't even have my ears pierced. In the current state of the art, medicine can only repair my sex toy, not my reproductive organs, so I learned to get along with my junk rather than see it as a cancerous growth that i needed to get removed.
When I was getting my diagnosis, the brain hormone panel came back in the female range. Four years on HRT hasn't made much change to my body, which was already fairly feminine. My boobs are a little bigger and i have a lot less body hair. Finasteride is helping regrow scalp hair. More than anything else, having the proper hormones in me has helped tremendously with internal medicine and behavioral health issues associated with the hormone imbalance. The truscums believe I shouldn't be allowed access to them because i'm not trying to get my penis turned into a vagina. what kind of crap is that?
This is where the truscums are dead wrong and taking sides with the misinformed religious right trying to exterminate all LGBTQ identifying people. Fewer than 20% of people expressing as transgender claim to require surgery to be able to cope with their Gender Dysphoria and a substantial portion don't suffer GD at all. Sorry, ladies, but your inability to cope with the hand you were dealt does not give you any authority to define what is or is not "true trans".
To judge a trans woman on the basis of her appearance or attire is reprehensible. I don't claim to be "female". I'm an intersex person. I'm a blend of both. I have a female brain and male junk. After 60 years of pretending to be male, I couldn't just unzip the boy suit and walk away from it. I won't wear makeup unless there's a reason to and i don't like the way i look in a dress. skirts and tank tops work for me.
I never raped a child , fucked a dog or drove anybody to suicide. Anything other than what i have admitted to is libelous fiction. I have never given head to a man or allowed my asshole to be penetrated by anything other than my doctor's finger. I lust after nothing other than a really kind trans man who has a lot of respect for my writings and spunk. It's not looking very promising though, because he's bi and prefers men. The sex was nice.
My presentation is pretty agender. On the street it's about half and half how I get read. All I have to do is quietly inform them that I prefer people relate to me as female and most get it without an explanation. the ONLY people who give me any push back are transsexuals and TERFs. I've only had a few instances where cis people made stupid statements about being transgender. Most people don't notice. and if they do, they're accepting. All transgender people should live someplace so safe and accepting.
I grew up in the gayborhood and we had transsexual neighbors, so I've also observed the evolution of "gender affirmation procedures" (GAP) since the early 1960's. I've been following the literature in the college libraries and popular periodicals since 1973 at the University of Illinois - Chicago Circle and discovering an issue of Kim Christy's "Female Mimics International" in a magazine shop on Halsted St. . I worked in Ob-Gyn at Southwestern Medical School at Dallas in the early 80's. My lab did the blood work for the gender clinic down the hall.
I lurked the trans community online without saying anything until about 2010, finding sites like lynn conway's homepage, vicki rene's 'prettiest of the pretty' , susan's, ts roadmap, mermaids and a lot of quality advocates like jen richards, kate bornstein and jenny boylan right away in 1999 when I came online with my business full time. Since coming out, i have started a number of transgender oriented groups and two of them, The Transgender Caucus and Transgender Science have over 500 members today. Rainbow Family Transsisters is available for crisis intervention.
I'm a regular contributor to Transgender Community Coalition, International Transgender Health, Transgender Achievements and Excellence to Celebrate, Transgender Zone, Intersex and Trans Alliance and Transgender Rights Worldwide.
if you want to know if it's dee or me who is a "true trans" , just compare our friends lists and the rosters of the trans groups that we're in. She's no "pioneer" . She's a frustrated perennial pre-op who hates herself and projects it at well adjusted transgender women. She lies to herself about herself and lies about others to bolster her shitty self esteem. Their philosophy of "only two genders" is very harmful and contributes to the ongoing global genocide against transgender people.
If there is a "trans agenda" , this is how the trans people i respect related it to me:
- We are all uniquely crafted and we all make our own decisions how to present ourselves
- Nobody's transition or lack of one invalidates anybody else's gender expression
- Respect people's pronoun preferences even if they don't look to be what gender they want people to relate to them as.
- Judge not for you are also a fuck up
- It's about hearts, not parts.
- Love everybody. Hate nobody
Thanks for reading this. I look forward to thoughtful comments and other trans people's narratives. Mean, stupid people will be put on ignore without a response.
PS This is why Dee Dee got booted from Transgender Science. She insists there are only two genders claiming that all the others are just constructs of feminist propaganda.
The Future of Sex and Gender in Psychology: Five Challenges to the Gender Binary
Dee Dee E Price please stop and let us do what we have to to prove any existence of anything other than binary .. I am telling you right now I have seen the study dissections plates and the MRI scans. Active Scans that you can actually run through.
there is no challenges in psychology I have studied medicine a very long time looking for answers
only medical science and brain dissections is going to solve this along with serious MRI scan data up until their death and brain harvest. Someone telling some psychologist i feel like this and they use their social studies degree to try to help But they can not prescribe medicine of any kind why? They are not a medical professional
There is also another political back story. If you erase the binary feminist believe they will be rid of men forever.
you should read some of their crap and then see why they say push for men to be erased. and go radical they start to talk about killing off men and keeping male numbers limited to only a few.
Laura A Jacobs Please stop commenting on the studies I post to consistently bash psychology and mental health.
Dee Dee E Price Laura A Jacobs psychiatry is part of the field in the neurobiology look up Gooren it is the mental health section. and he is one of the reasons we are here.
Fact is without him there would have been no medical study. no subjects to study on, nothing but Paul Mchugh and a life you have no clue about. But i do. I endured it.
Do you know what the ( years life test ) is? Have you ever heard the horrible man woman story that was required by law? Hormones won't do........... a nightmare designed to run you away.
they only gave me one choice of hormones. Experimental even to this day. they are better than pills shots patches 6 months supply at one shot. or more like stabbing with a funnel. with a tip big enough to pass a moth ball through.
it took only one time for my family to scream at the doctors and i was dropped quickly. But i went back regardless of the massive pain in my hip the agonizing actually but i had to be me.
And it was the psychiatrist that studied us in Europe and ignored us in the USA. My first she was not from the US and was educated in Europe So she signed me. in 1984.
In 1982 i started Premed. I did not really want to wait. Do you know what it is like to try to hide in a male dorm because of your era and how they based things. Yea i had been going to her a while. You see you had to have a psychiatrist the whole time. and report to them every week until the years life test. then you had to report to them every two weeks. better not fail. if you do no surgery.
Years life test requirements. move out of your city to a new place. without any change to documents and get a job a place to stay and live as a woman for a year without anyone finding out. If they found out you failed and no surgery. But if they could not tell you passed and got to have your surgery.
and you had to have two psychiatrist sign off on surgery. and well it got to be astronomically expensive. everything was out of pocket including hormones. mine were. 980 for a 6 months supply and it was the only option i was allowed. even if they did have pills that was only for women born female.
if you were M to F they had to by law use methods to run us off and keep us from transition. except my endocrinologist he told me about my body. and that changed everything for me. closer to female than male. you have no addams apple and your bone and muscle structure.
So yea i know a lot about it. but i will tell you this male psychiatrist are perverts. lol he is anyways. he is cool in casual situation but perverted.
But even he said the same thing. every other psychiatrist said.
Laura A Jacobs Dee Dee E Price Once again, this has nothing to do with the study I posted. I'm sorry you had such a horrible time decades ago, but those policies are no longer in place. Please keep your replies to the topic itself.
Casey Lyons Did you actually read the article? The challenges from psychological research are not someone saying "I feel like this." If you actually read the article and have some reasons why you disagree, you are welcome to share them, but just a blanket statement where you assert with no evidence that a challenge doesn't exist because you personally haven't seen it is not academic, it's not scientific, and it doesn't add to this conversation. Also psychiatry and psychology may be distinct, but they are both valuable, necessary sciences. Not being a medical professional doesn't mean the person's Ph.D. is written in crayon, an entomologist isn't a medical professional either. An astrophysicist isn't a medical professional. An engineer isn't a medical professional. But they are all scientists, studying different things.