Lolcows that you considered Ungodly Lucky -

Un Platano

big blatano xDDDD
True & Honest Fan
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Chris has been kicked out of college, arrested and sued several times, has burned his house down, and currently only has a home because his mother is a lich, and yet he's still out there in the wild. The one reason I would say DSP is more lucky is that Chris's luck is going to run out one day, but I don't know if DSP's will.
 

Basement Dwelling Dork

My only diet is cheez-it's snacks and monster zero
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Chris has been kicked out of college, arrested and sued several times, has burned his house down, and currently only has a home because his mother is a lich, and yet he's still out there in the wild. The one reason I would say DSP is more lucky is that Chris's luck is going to run out one day, but I don't know if DSP's will.
Don't forget how Chris nearly did a hit and run on Snyder. The man had the patience of a saint who made sure Chris and his mother didn't get thrown into the slammer

DSP is already convinced me how RNG jesus keeps drawing his card to blindslide the Irs while Phil gets away.
 
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HIVidaBoheme

I know who's been naughty
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Amberlynn, her cancer turned out to be quite benign and easily treated. As said in the thread this couldn't have happened to a better person.

Brittany Jhonson aka Peaches as well, she's on a personal quest to catch every STD known to man yet HIV seems to be actively avoiding her. Plus she brags of this fact after fucking men raw without them knowing she already contracted 4 STDs without treatment. Add to this she literally eats her own shit and nothing seems to be happening to her as result of this.
 

Titty Figurine

Necrothot
True & Honest Fan
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Ice Poseidon. More internet chode than prime angus but the man's ability to just shrug off arrests and swattings while everyone around him goes down in flames is uncanny.

Plus, I mean Andy Dick just walked into his fucking house one day. Andy Dick is a natural force of chaos and sex crime anyway but for Ice's content at the time that's a golden coincidence.
 

Coach Kreeton Of All That

Spoopy Repairman/Chuck Huber Otherkin/THOT fucker
True & Honest Fan
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Leonard F. Shaner Jr., Christopher McGee/ClawShrimpy, Arthur Chu, James Terry Mitchell/werewolf2814, Mike Holland/Dezirae Clark, Michael Christopher Martin/DaddyOFive, Hal Turner, Dylan Hafertepen, Cecily Kellogg, Jesse Young, Todd Nickerson, Bill Schmalfeldt, Paul "Stefonknee" Wolscht, Joshua Robert Barnes/PAB, David Stone/DanceOfLife. They keep dodging the law or the law doesn't phase them at all. They haven't even been touched by the coof.
 

Draza

BETRAYALLLLLLLLLLLL
True & Honest Fan
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Onision for not being behind a jail cell and Chibinekodemyx for not being kicked out of his mother's house already.
 

Kenya Jones

Hard-R Gamer
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This actually makes me think. Basically every lolcow has some way of getting away with shit. Even the ones whos luck ran out still get lucky (look at Nick Bates, hes not dead yet). I really think there is something about lolcows almost always being able to get away with shit that they should never have gotten away with.

Also Tommy Tooter, say what you want about the hobo, he's not dead or in jail yet.
 

Tragi-Chan

A thousand years old
True & Honest Fan
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This actually makes me think. Basically every lolcow has some way of getting away with shit. Even the ones whos luck ran out still get lucky (look at Nick Bates, hes not dead yet). I really think there is something about lolcows almost always being able to get away with shit that they should never have gotten away with.

Also Tommy Tooter, say what you want about the hobo, he's not dead or in jail yet.
In many cases, I think it’s that they’re so obviously pathetic, retarded or crazy that normal people don’t want to engage. Like, Tooter is an obnoxious prick, but most people don’t want to beat a crazy old hobo up. Similarly, ADF and CWC obviously aren’t playing with a full deck.
 

REGENDarySumanai

Foxburger
Local Moderator
True & Honest Fan
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In many cases, I think it’s that they’re so obviously pathetic, retarded or crazy that normal people don’t want to engage. Like, Tooter is an obnoxious prick, but most people don’t want to beat a crazy old hobo up. Similarly, ADF and CWC obviously aren’t playing with a full deck.
Chris is just a few cards short, but ADF has half the deck missing.
 

BoerBro

kiwifarms.net
onision...hes done some questionable things
God that guy is a bastard. worst part is how slimy and hard to grab he is...
CWC because no one has murdered him yet for his crimes against humanity.
CWC is incredibly lucky... I've read the most of the threads and watched that 40 part series on youtube about him... how the fuck does one win that many competitions?
 

Aqua Panda

I've seen horrors… horrors that you've seen.
kiwifarms.net
DSP by far.

Especially after the bankruptcy saga. It's utterly amazing the man has been able to lie, cheat, and game the system for so long while avoiding every major consequence of note.
 

The Shadow

Edgy two gun mystery man
kiwifarms.net
MovieBob's body still lives despite thriving on anger, Mike's Hard Lemonade and McNuggets, and his brain went long ago. This confounds me.

I'm also surprised Nintendo hasn't sent a Yakuza enforcer to encourage Mario's #1 fan to be quieter and stop damaging the brand by association.
 

verygayFrogs

kiwifarms.net
Manda Tee bc I’m near her residence and I’m so close to calling the cops on her because of the pedo shit. And call gamefreak because she be getting freaky with one of their characters.

Though half of the death fats count because they aren’t dead yet
 
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Clem

Rattle 'em bois
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I'm pretty pissed off its DSP. Doesn't deserve it but when one autist says jump the rest say how high.
 

Mr. Bung

Alles klar herr kommissar?
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Cole Smithy is a lolcow like his brother Chris for his hyper inflated ego ("The Smartest Film Critic in the World,") unwarranted self-importance, and questionable critiques of movies. Yet he seems to fly under the radar most to the time and is successful enough to eek out a living, and live in Manhattan of all places.
 
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