Lolcows you'd actually hang out with -

Table Country

Mad Dax might be a mewling bitch, but he seems like a decent enough guy to hang around.
Also Sargon. Despite my open distaste for him I feel like if you stripped his politics and dumb takes away Carl'd just be a slightly-above-average, quasi-successful neckbeard.

Very Honest Content

(Formerly a) Niggo(?)
Terry Davis when he was alive would have been my answer but he's with Mr God now.

So instead I'll go with Derek Savage, I'd attend the third annual 420 awards on April 20, 2021 with him to take in the show, he seems very in on the joke and that's a good thing.

There's other lolcows whose orbiters I'd hang out with rather than the lolcow themselves, Kat Burnell currently trapped in the orbit of her husband Darkse DePhil, Bibi from Chantal Sarault's thread to ask him about his great escape, Warren Lynch from the John Walker Flynt subforum just to rabble rouse local politicians.
  • Like
  • Agree
Reactions: Calooby and Draza


Dumb answer, but probably Shmorky if he isn't dead. He was one of the reasons I got into cartoons, and even though he's a completely disgusting human being and an all-around degenerate, he would be an extremely interesting person to say I talked to.


100% kawaii
Probably around attractive women like Yaniv and Araujo tho I don't know if I could resist the combined hotness of them to the point of not sexually assaulting both.

But seriously talking, I would probably take CWC for an ice cream or hamburger and try to get him to go see some professional people about his gender and life in general.


Unlimited Alt Works.
Vaush tbh. Guy's eloquent enough to have a discussion with, and we could probably strategize legitimate progressive policies, as opposed to some fuckwit ideologue who refuses to engage in the politics of the system (despite the fact their precious Lenin advocated for engaging in electoralism as a bulwark against fascistic takeover, but y'know god forbid a political extremist be anything more than an online LARPer).

Flamenco sounds cute in an autistic sort of way. We could probably cuddle/smoke weed and watch anime.
We could easily get into some FGO tisms.
  • Like
Reactions: Marco Fucko


Griffith did this.
True & Honest Fan
Dick Masterson so he can invite me to his nice mansion.