Lolcows you'd actually hang out with -

TitanWest

Based Penguin Guy
kiwifarms.net
I disagree with Styx politically and religiously, but he'd be interesting to talk with on nonpartisan subjects like the history of occultism. If we talked something partisan he'd be too much of the free spirit "No one tells me what to do, man" type. Martin Shkreli isn't a lolcow in my book, but he has a thread and he seems like he'd be cool to hang out with. Btw Shkreli didn't do the bad shit the media accused him of - people who couldn't afford the higher price got a massive government subsidy to bring the cost next to nothing and Shkreli needed the money to update the drug's research. I'd redpill you more, but I'd charge you $1,000 per pill.

Also post-lipo suction Momokun because I'd wreck that shit like Princess Diana.
 

Enoby Way

Trans Alpaca Ranch Queen Domme
kiwifarms.net
Jim Sterling, he can be self-righteous and he goes too far in the direction of leaving things out in order to keep the GAME COMPANY BAD narrative going but he actually gives a shit about customer rights and I can get behind that. Mostly though its because I have a dumb sense of humour and I enjoy his ridiculous skits. Plus who else would commission a ridiculously huge purple lycra bodysuit for a one-off joke and then accidentally become a beloved amateur wrestler?
 

Autumnal Equinox

Dinsdale!
kiwifarms.net
Before his big downfall, I wouldn't have minded hanging out with Spoony. Even now I wouldn't mind so much just because his sadbrains probably wouldn't let him notice me looting all his tabletop stuff.
 

LazarusOwenhart

Terrainist Shitlord!
kiwifarms.net
Gail, just because in her videos her house looks vaguely bearable to be in and I'd love to just hear her rant for hours about Jesuits and jizz missiles.
 
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NoFeline

im intersex i have both uwu
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
LadyALT. She has some pretty unique perspectives, and seems like she would be funny in person.

Maybe Jim Sterling, since a lot of people are much less politically insufferable in real life.

I'm not up to date on my Cooking With Jack lore but Jack Scalfani seems like a he would be a fun uncle or something.
 
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Spunt

A Leading Source of Experimental Internet Gas
kiwifarms.net
I dunno man, some of Stonetoss' output gives off a real strong Incel vibe and those people are never any fun to be around.
 

MerriedxReldnahc

World's Okay-est Proctologist
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
I have a soft spot for Abby Brown, she might be absolutly exhausting to be around but if she was in a good mood maybe not. I'm sure we could connect over our mutual love of questionable fashion.
 
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JambledUpWords

RBG wins
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
More for the lulz, but I’d hang out with MermaidQueenJude and see how long it takes before she goes off on me (because Jude has a habit of turning innocent phrases and words into something offensive).

Not going to lie, but I would have lunch with @DocHoliday1977 just to see how crazy the conversations could get. Also, she’s slightly endearing with the sperging.

Finally, I’d hang out with Dear Feeder because I’m fat and I don’t want to feel guilty about food portions.
 
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DocHoliday1977

Mentally Disabled Schizoposter
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
More for the lulz, but I’d hang out with MermaidQueenJude and see how long it takes before she goes off on me (because Jude has a habit of turning innocent phrases and words into something offensive).

Not going to lie, but I would have lunch with @DocHoliday1977 just to see how crazy the conversations could get. Also, she’s slightly endearing with the sperging.

Finally, I’d hang out with Dear Feeder because I’m fat and I don’t want to feel guilty about food portions.
I don't talk while eating.
 
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Gun Safety

kiwifarms.net
Probably ContraPoints, even though they’re a troon they seem like they’d be able to hold an interesting conversation and also not judge me for drinking too much.

Other than that basically any male lolcow who first got a following from doing videos on games or pop culture. I’m sure most of them are alright irl but, like most nerds, put a spot light on them and they will consistently make a fool of themselves
 

PurpleSquirrel

I owe God five skulls.
kiwifarms.net
Styxhexenhammer666. He's an intelligent guy whom I'd love to chat with about politics and metaphysical stuff.

@jenffer a jay always came off as a friendly, decent sort. Would love to have some brews n' buds with her.

And I would definitely want to party with Gloria Tesch, even though I wouldn't expect much out of her beyond pop-culture references and general narcissism.
 

BadGoy1488

Sonichu OC is best OC
kiwifarms.net
I would not say they are ones I "want to hang out with" but there are a few who's brains I would love to pick. Jim Sterling, I feel like I would have a good political talk with (I'm a former lefty). Even though I disagree with him a lot, I think it comes from a good place. Talks about games new and old would be good too.

Terry Davis (if post mortem is ok). I don't know too much about computers and how operating systems work, but I love hearing people talk about what they love if they are talented in the field. Might learn something.

I enjoy DSP memes, but, I also don't think he is the embodiment of Satan like some seem to claim. I feel like I would not last long, but I would love to hear him sperg out unfiltered, with no camera.

Lastly. I would love to hang out with metokur. Drink, toke, and talk games, politics, philosophy, and shitty movies and anime. I have been an unironic fan of his since I first stumbled upon him.

And fuck it, I would not mind kicking it will Null either
 
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