Losing people to transgenderism support thread - Support group for trans widows and other people who lost loved ones to troonism

How many people in your life have you seen troon out?(not including cows)


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Yinci

Another Lain PfP
kiwifarms.net
As a "trooner" I worry a childhood friend who I haven't seen in person for 10 years now. I am in a totally different reality from her at this point. As she moves on with building up her life our paths will probably distance. She is inevitably moving away from spending a lot of time online that kept us connected. I am open to re-igniting the friendship but not banking on it, it's strange.

My personal "troon pitty story" is that I never felt I had a chance as a guy and never developed anything normal. I blame people for treating me poorly including this friend and have no care if they are hurt emotionally by me being a freak in my own life. No one really seems to care so far which is chill and I feel as if a lot of connections people normally have are absent from my life. Tbh my life is blank slate in a way right now and I kinda like that.
 
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Aaa0aaa0

internet sticker enthusiast
kiwifarms.net
I still get upset whenever she's brought up but compared to my friends, I got off light. If anything, I'm more upset for them. They can't speak up against her abuse because she's more popular than they are and is definitely the sort to pull the trans card and send her followers after them.
Your former friend is fake and gay. You, L, & H are stunning and brave. I'm glad you guys fucked off.

She seems slightly dangerous. I'm surprised she let you off so relatively easy. I think her popularity is a double edged sword: she is powerful and can wield it like a club, but she's terrified of looking bad and losing power like BPD & other cluster B relatives. She might have a tinge of guilt but really won't care at all as soon as you came back and would blame you and your friends instead, predictably. I think she's worried you guys will call her out eventually, which is great since even if you don't it means she'll avoid you.

You're right on trooning out: she seems to have an unstable identity. I wouldn't be surprised if before she became popular she had even more social media names she wigged out on once they went bad. Trooning is the new baptism, except you can change your name as many times as you want and blame transphobia and not understanding yourself for shitty behavior.

I hope you 3 continue to support each other. Even if she bugs you guys in the future I'm sure you and your pals can get through it. :)
sorry if this sound little off topic

I mentioned in another thread that online friends stopped talking to me because I'm very "transphobic/homophobic" but i still have this other (trans) friend online that I really appreciate and i dont want to lose because he acts like someone normal, he very rarely talks about his identity and it seems that he does not care or simply ignores when I make a critical post about LGBT, we have been talking for a few years and I want to think that everything is going well, but i am worried that one day he will simply join the radical trans train. do you think talk to him about his identity and how he feels about it its is a good idea? or is there any way to prevent him from joining the trans cult?
I feel like this is on topic. This is trans prevention into trooning (everyone has their own definition, I'm using it to mean transitioned for shit reasons and is destructive to themselves and/or others).

As long as you come in on friendly terms and ask him about trans stuff with an open mind, people like that usually don't mind sharing and disscussion. If he says he doesn't want to, don't worry about it further. Come from a place of curiosity and understanding, and ask him as the friend you are. You are friends, he probably won't mind explaining why he transitioned or how he feels about the trans community. If he does, respect it and move on.

If something happens: You can try to prevent people from doing things, but unless you're physically restraining someone, they might do it anyway. The more you push on them not to do something when they want to, the more they'll push back even if they know you're right. They just won't want you to be. This applies to more than just troon cult though, this applies to anything. Say your piece and make your position clear but don't go further than that unless they cross a hard line for you (like hurting someone emotionally or physically, or them being physically painful to watch) and go from there.

He doesn't seem like he'll need that. Just from your sentence of "he doesn't bring up he's trans much", it seems like its the same as any other identity for him: he's trans, but it's not his entire life. He is himself and his interests first and foremost. I feel you only habe to worry about him if he starts talking about how great being trans/his gender/gay or straightness is multiple times in a week. That's when someone is compensating for something.

In spite of my opening post, transitioning wasn't the straw that broke the camel's back for me with my friend. It was them heading towards more extreme thoughts and crowds and self destructive coping mechanisms. They've always been anxious and influenced by peer pressure (even though their friends would probably still like them even if they didn't transition). Medically transitioning when they said they didn't want the side effects of it earlier was a signal that they changed too much for me, a signal that they didn't know what they wanted. Antifa was a signal of being too hard with following their feelings and beliefs. I still have they/them friends I love and respect and don't mind being friendly to anyone who's trans second and themselves first. It's a personality shift and a priorities to an identity shift you have to worry about, and I think you understand that. There will be people on here that say "every trans person leads to disappointment, stop calling them their perfered pronouns and tell them to cut it out or just fuck off because they're a lost cause", but I don't think that's true (I respect them though as they probably have been burned by troons before). I don't agree with that and several people on the farms still maintain friendships with transfriends. Don't let your worries or the words of others on trans people get the better of you is what I'm trying to say. As long as your friendship works, don't worry about it.

Lastly your friend doesn't seem like a cluster b mess. Some like BPD can be fine if they are actually trying to manage it (it is hard but can be done), but if they aren't then you know, that's your cue to fuck off.
 

Caesar Augustus

kiwifarms.net
I came here to laugh at everyone else, but reading these stories has got me worried about a friend of mine. She's the oldest and possibly closest friend I've ever had and she used to vent her problems to me a lot. Lately, it seems she's growing a bit distant. The last time she grew distant she eventually stopped and came out to me as a lesbian. I know she has some troon friends, and although she seems to know there's something off about them, I still worry for her. Is my paranoia unfounded?
 

Aaa0aaa0

internet sticker enthusiast
kiwifarms.net
I came here to laugh at everyone else, but reading these stories has got me worried about a friend of mine. She's the oldest and possibly closest friend I've ever had and she used to vent her problems to me a lot. Lately, it seems she's growing a bit distant. The last time she grew distant she eventually stopped and came out to me as a lesbian. I know she has some troon friends, and although she seems to know there's something off about them, I still worry for her. Is my paranoia unfounded?
If it turns out she decided to change career paths or comes out as poly, then yes (but poly would still suck). If it turns out she does come out as a troon, then no.

She's your friend. Go ahead and say "Hey, you've been distant lately, something on your mind?" & "Just wondering since the last time you did this was before you came out as a lesbian. I just want to know if I did something or if you're in thought and need help figuring something out." Talk it out like bros, and if she's still cagey, you'll have to respect it and let her be until she stops being such.

Its not unfounded if she has a pattern of falling to peer pressure or unstable identities. Ever since Ellen Page became Elliot, it's been a case of "oh no are my lesbians going to go beyond the dkyeosphre?" For whatever biological reason we chicks are more sensitive to social pressure and trend following & are overwhelmingly the main make uo for eating disorders because of it. Something similar is happening with troonism, both the beauty parlor and other trans threads can testify.

Basically: maybe, maybe not. Just be a nice friend & ask, then back off if she doesn't want to talk until she decides to.
 

El_Cacahuate

always angry
kiwifarms.net
I kinda agree with Null on there being different kinds of Transpeople.

1. Schizo types who genuinely hate women and view being one as the ultimate form of humiliation. They want to violate women's spaces and harm women. This is about revenge against Stacy, and having institutional power.

2. Sexual deviants who want fire fighters to see their grotesque form. Often pedophiles and plenty of overlap with 1.

3. Trad waifu UwU types. They failed to be the male ideal and so want to be taken care of and put on a pedestal like a Twitch girl. Unlike the first two categories, they have a very romantic view of what being a woman is like, but also a respect for traditional masculinity.

4. Normal guys with overly-traditional backgrounds that made them feel like an utter failure. They failed to fit into the masculine ideal and got hate on for it, even from so-called progressives who claimed to not value such things. They did not necessarily "fail as men", but they didn't conform to the roles and so changed based on the understanding that they would feel more comfortable with themselves.

The first two categories are lost causes, the third category will likely forever be painfully overly-edgy, and the fourth category is vulnerable to indoctrination.

If they fall into the third category just keep up bantering with them. If they fall into the fourth category, be extra sure to distinguish the subculture from the identity itself. Its like furries, the fetish in of itself isn't necessarily damning, but the subcultures are often dangerous.

I feel like this is on topic. This is trans prevention into trooning (everyone has their own definition, I'm using it to mean transitioned for shit reasons and is destructive to themselves and/or others).

As long as you come in on friendly terms and ask him about trans stuff with an open mind, people like that usually don't mind sharing and disscussion. If he says he doesn't want to, don't worry about it further. Come from a place of curiosity and understanding, and ask him as the friend you are. You are friends, he probably won't mind explaining why he transitioned or how he feels about the trans community. If he does, respect it and move on.

If something happens: You can try to prevent people from doing things, but unless you're physically restraining someone, they might do it anyway. The more you push on them not to do something when they want to, the more they'll push back even if they know you're right. They just won't want you to be. This applies to more than just troon cult though, this applies to anything. Say your piece and make your position clear but don't go further than that unless they cross a hard line for you (like hurting someone emotionally or physically, or them being physically painful to watch) and go from there.

He doesn't seem like he'll need that. Just from your sentence of "he doesn't bring up he's trans much", it seems like its the same as any other identity for him: he's trans, but it's not his entire life. He is himself and his interests first and foremost. I feel you only habe to worry about him if he starts talking about how great being trans/his gender/gay or straightness is multiple times in a week. That's when someone is compensating for something.

In spite of my opening post, transitioning wasn't the straw that broke the camel's back for me with my friend. It was them heading towards more extreme thoughts and crowds and self destructive coping mechanisms. They've always been anxious and influenced by peer pressure (even though their friends would probably still like them even if they didn't transition). Medically transitioning when they said they didn't want the side effects of it earlier was a signal that they changed too much for me, a signal that they didn't know what they wanted. Antifa was a signal of being too hard with following their feelings and beliefs. I still have they/them friends I love and respect and don't mind being friendly to anyone who's trans second and themselves first. It's a personality shift and a priorities to an identity shift you have to worry about, and I think you understand that. There will be people on here that say "every trans person leads to disappointment, stop calling them their perfered pronouns and tell them to cut it out or just fuck off because they're a lost cause", but I don't think that's true (I respect them though as they probably have been burned by troons before). I don't agree with that and several people on the farms still maintain friendships with transfriends. Don't let your worries or the words of others on trans people get the better of you is what I'm trying to say. As long as your friendship works, don't worry about it.

Lastly your friend doesn't seem like a cluster b mess. Some like BPD can be fine if they are actually trying to manage it (it is hard but can be done), but if they aren't then you know, that's your cue to fuck off.
Thank you for your answers
By the way, I don't know if the reason he's so low-key is because he's not on hormonal treatment yet, but he works on his appearance, he exercises and he dresses well, he strive to pass
I hope that talking to him shows that our friendship matters more to me than any difference in opinions.
 

Yinci

Another Lain PfP
kiwifarms.net
I kinda agree with Null on there being different kinds of Transpeople.

1. Schizo types who genuinely hate women and view being one as the ultimate form of humiliation. They want to violate women's spaces and harm women. This is about revenge against Stacy, and having institutional power.

2. Sexual deviants who want fire fighters to see their grotesque form. Often pedophiles and plenty of overlap with 1.

3. Trad waifu UwU types. They failed to be the male ideal and so want to be taken care of and put on a pedestal like a Twitch girl. Unlike the first two categories, they have a very romantic view of what being a woman is like, but also a respect for traditional masculinity.

4. Normal guys with overly-traditional backgrounds that made them feel like an utter failure. They failed to fit into the masculine ideal and got hate on for it, even from so-called progressives who claimed to not value such things. They did not necessarily "fail as men", but they didn't conform to the roles and so changed based on the understanding that they would feel more comfortable with themselves.

The first two categories are lost causes, the third category will likely forever be painfully overly-edgy, and the fourth category is vulnerable to indoctrination.

If they fall into the third category just keep up bantering with them. If they fall into the fourth category, be extra sure to distinguish the subculture from the identity itself. Its like furries, the fetish in of itself isn't necessarily damning, but the subcultures are often dangerous.
I've been threw every one of these I think in a phases. Probably ending off with number 4 or 3. I feel like they are all at play but depends which one is dominant. Can't say for everyone but reading this feels like my life when it got dark. I feel like a proud 3 now.
 
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Slap47

Hehe xd
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Thank you for your answers
By the way, I don't know if the reason he's so low-key is because he's not on hormonal treatment yet, but he works on his appearance, he exercises and he dresses well, he strive to pass
I hope that talking to him shows that our friendship matters more to me than any difference in opinions.
Just keep this mind that it is the small everyday acts of kindness that make all of the differences in the world. The harmful troon subculture preys on those who feel vulnerable, and isolated so preventing people from feeling that way should stop any transformation. Awareness of the subculture and how its separate from the identity itself is also important.

Sure this is a bullying forum but I would like to think that its not a place of hate and destruction. Rather, I would like to think this is a place where people feel free to be genuine, banter and laugh at emperors with no clothes.
 

Niggerman

Niggerman did nothing wrong
kiwifarms.net
Make a joke or don't... But I feel sorta blessed that I was allowed to be a faggot without ever crossing paths with some "expert" suggesting "maybe that fag is akshully a woman, have some estrogen"
you poor brainwashed soul. Faggots and trannies are the same shit one mutilates their body through foreign hormones the other through STDs. theres nothing blessed about shoving dicks up your ass. You should get some help b4 you die of STDs
 

Dysnomia

Is Reimu gonna have to smack a bitch?
kiwifarms.net
I have two stories to share of FtMs who I have no personal investment in other than observing their behaviour after having interacted with them in the past.

The first is the daughter of bookshop owners who are best known for continually pissing off the traditionalist/conservative town they are based in with left-wing schemes, including denouncing Christmas due to celebrations being offensive to minorities. The daughter received her mother's name upon birth, which might clue you into their family dynamic. This girl studied theatre art, working on her own projects such as hanging out with hookers in an erotic gay club and locking herself into a room in an almost-naked state for a few days straight with only paint and canvas to keep her occupied. She culturally enriched a country in Asia for about a year and is currently teaching theatre to children in immigrant / refugee camps. I'm surprised she hasn't been strung up by the parents yet.

This girl always presented with shortish hair but in the past year started to require they / them pronouns and lobbed off her breasts via a mastectomy. She seems unhealthily obsessed with them though, frequently showing off her grotesque scars as well as calling attention to custom breasted stuff animals and coffee mugs with nipples. She is currently producing a webseries about breasts and recorded possibly the worst theme song in existence, which I sadly cannot share without revealing her identity. She also lived in a campervan for a while, but currently occupies a regular apartment where she expands her collection of gaudy tattoos and nose piercings.
-----​
The other case is a girl I had physical relations with - I was older than her and ran into her right as she started her BSc in a STEM field. This was a plenty feminine person, who enjoyed riding her horses and playing games like the Sims and Assassin's Creed which are traditionaly popular with the fairer sex - I later heard she had her walls painted with a landscape taken from some indie game. While a bit chunky, this was unmistakably a woman but I suspect it was the enablers she surrounded herself with that sent her down the troon path. She ended up taking hormones, growing out facial hair but completely failing to pass, changed her name, and recently got engaged to a man that claims to be homosexual and has the nastiest hair you'll ever see. The girl now works in a dead-end job wherein she resets passwords for clueless old people all day - the Bsc and later Msc going to complete waste.

Both girls have no child-rearing ambitions and instead dote on pets instead. Neither had a history of mental illness but did sit at the centre of support networks that enabled them - the former case encouraged by her artsy friends and the strangest set of parents you'll ever meet while the latter case was encouraged by the gamer crowd that has led to so many men trooning out.


Having read this thread I feel like most of the experiences described by Farmers deal with MtF transitions, so hopefully this post will have highlighted the other side of the coin some more (or really just entertained one of you). Women are perhaps just as susceptible to being lured into irreparably damaging their bodies by subsets of society that reward such behaviour as men are. The former girl was likely a lost cause anyway with parents like the ones she has, but the latter could be seen in a different light; in this brave and stunning current year she spends her days popping hormones and pegging a man, whereas she would almost certainly have matured into a normal Cisgender mother had she been born as little as ten years earlier.

The breast girl sounds like she tried to fix her body image issues by getting rid of the parts she was obsessed with. And it obviously didn't work. She should have gotten intensive therapy instead. Hope she doesn't an hero in a few years after realising what she's done in an attempt to self cure.
 

annoyingfuck

kiwifarms.net
I really hope as we get towards the decade long marker of this madness that most who detransitioned don't kill themselves. I want to see more people who go on with their lives in spite of their mistakes, and hopefully have voices to speak up when other people start detransing.
How can they 'go on with their lives' when they have destroyed the parts of their bodies that allow them to do that, unless of course they always wanted to be childfree? How can they go on with their lives, when they have to permanently take meds, for their bodies to cope with what they did to it; when they have to go through life knowing that they had a choice, and they chose incorrectly?

When majority of those people already had mental health issues, and disorders like ASD, there is no way in hell they can just 'go on with their lives', they ruined any chance of maybe fitting into a society that already stigmatises them, and now they live with a day in day out reminder.

These aren't 'mistakes', they are life altering choices that make or break their futures, and for majority of them, they are broken in every way possible.
 

0x0000C1A

This is not a Tragedy - It's not an accident!
kiwifarms.net
I really hope as we get towards the decade long marker of this madness that most who detransitioned don't kill themselves.
You can't unfuck a trainwreck. Depending on how deep a person went in terms of transitioning - the more blatant are the consequences of transitioning.
 

Aaa0aaa0

internet sticker enthusiast
kiwifarms.net
How can they 'go on with their lives' when they have destroyed the parts of their bodies that allow them to do that, unless of course they always wanted to be childfree? How can they go on with their lives, when they have to permanently take meds, for their bodies to cope with what they did to it; when they have to go through life knowing that they had a choice, and they chose incorrectly?

When majority of those people already had mental health issues, and disorders like ASD, there is no way in hell they can just 'go on with their lives', they ruined any chance of maybe fitting into a society that already stigmatises them, and now they live with a day in day out reminder.

These aren't 'mistakes', they are life altering choices that make or break their futures, and for majority of them, they are broken in every way possible.

You can't unfuck a trainwreck. Depending on how deep a person went in terms of transitioning - the more blatant are the consequences of transitioning.

I said I hope, not I believe. There's a good number of people who threw themselves into cults or got into horrible accidents and haven't killed themselves, even when that shit was their fault. The more worrying issue is that a number of them ain't getting the help they need from therapy and never will due to them personality or choice wise. Even if they didn't become trans, they'd be killing themselves, that's not unexpected. Chole Segal was crazy and would do it anyway even if he wasn't trans.

I'm looking more at those not in constant debilitating pain with mild mental illnesses and just fell into a bad crowd. Most HRT only folks who don't chop their dick off or graft one on are basically mildly disabled rather than fucked. Men get off more lightly but still have to worry about increased blood clot risk, fertility, and moob surgery.

Edit: those who have puberty blockers are a mixed bag. If their parents and family still support them then they have a chance - there's enough soy parents in blue areas that honestly think their otherwise normal 7 year old will be happier as a woman, mislead rather than deranged. Kids like that have a shot if they detransition, but they're going to have shorter lives for medical reasons. Put those parents on suicide watch though.

Anyone who was transed because their parents are psycho or attention whores are just more likely to be fucked in general. If Jazz doesn't eat himself to death or an hero he'll be a lolcow/sadcow without his mom (if she dies before him or she doesn't murder suicide them) since his mom's tendrils are stuck in him deep. I doubt he'll wake up, even if he does, I could see a sheltered kid prone to binge eating becoming a drug addict and a different kind of lolcow.
Again, this isn't if Jazz's medical complications don't take him first.
 
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0x0000C1A

This is not a Tragedy - It's not an accident!
kiwifarms.net
mildly disabled rather than fucked.
Trannydom is a symptom of underlying mental issues which other trannies exploit to convince a subject to troon out - I don't consider "mildly" and "trans" to be fitting in the same sentence, considering how much does one have to be delusional to start HRT.

With an exception for people that pretend to be trans for some reason.
 

Aaa0aaa0

internet sticker enthusiast
kiwifarms.net
Trannydom is a symptom of underlying mental issues which other trannies exploit to convince a subject to troon out - I don't consider "mildly" and "trans" to be fitting in the same sentence with an exception for people that pretend to be trans for some reason.
I get you, but you can see teen girls swept up in it like it's the goth or emo fad for them. They just have more permanent damage from it. Even being mildly depressed, anxious, or otherwise uncomfortable with your body can lead you to transing. Emotions felt as a teen can die down more as an adult, particularly body uncomfortableness. There's enough detransitioners already who are managing themselves alright after all they went through though.
 

0x0000C1A

This is not a Tragedy - It's not an accident!
kiwifarms.net
I get you, but you can see teen girls swept up in it like it's the goth or emo fad for them.
Like being emo/goth, it's a phase first and foremost, and as it always is with teenage girls experimenting with retarded shit - they don't even try to commit to it.

I'm not denying that there are borderline delusional teens being coerced into trooning out - but it happens way less often than with the male counterparts.
 

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