Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial chicks

[GleamingTheQ-Bert]

"Dont worship money!"

"Look at my wad!"

Pick one, Lucas.

 

[Telomere Savalas]

question: how does Lucas get motel rooms if he has no credit cards?

Apparently that particular Motel 6 is a "crystal palace" that accepts cash.

 

[klickitat]

question: how does Lucas get motel rooms if he has no credit cards?

Shitty fleabag motels still tend to take cash.

 

[WonderWino]

I know it's dumb to give much thought to the rantings of a crazy bum...but...giving the woman $100 would "technically" be prostitution he said. What? Under no laws I'm aware of would taking money to have lunch with someone be illegal (pathetic yes, but not illegal). Also, giving the money to a 3rd party to get someone to have lunch with him, under his mental framework, would make that person a pimp but that's ok/legal?

I also loved his rationalization that this wasn't misogynistic, it was a "business transaction"...and somehow, because of "reasons", that makes it ok and totally above board.

What pure insanity he's blessed us with today.

The best part is how he thinks its not prostitution cause he gives the guy doing the hookup the money instead of the woman. One might call that being her pimp

 

[ThomasAudley]

Yeah the last motel adventure brought one of my fav ever lucas stills, just look at this slovenly degenerate eating an entire tray of barbecue that’s been left out overnight while laying down naked, too fat and lazy to even sit up.

 

[klickitat]

All that begging and unimpressive cash flashing to not get laid once again.

Bonus round of older videos of Lucas also offering money for a date and getting nothing but laughed at, catfished, and featured on Tosh.0.

Attached the Tosh.0 bit if you've never seen it before.

 

[boner_alert]

Possible gayops and poop-touching.

Nothing was confirmed but Goldy conveniently vanished right around the time Lucas got catfished to LA then strangers started paying for his shit. Like I said nothing confirmed, but it was certainly suspicious behavior given he only did so right when people started to suspect he was fondling the turd.

Spoiler: My own personal take

IMO Goldy's behavior also demonstrated that he was a one-trick pony, and a Wern-centric personality.
He could have gone onto to do other cows and shit, but instead he got caught up in presumed gayops which resulted in feeding a notorious pedofreak and E-begging Phase Wern (arguably the most unpopular Wern phase on this thread).
Even if he was caught up in it, he could have taken the heat, admitted he was being a faggot and moved on, but to so casually scrub his channel and his online persona that quickly shows he was ultimately invested in Wern and Wern alone.

I 've shit up the thread enough with all my bullshit about Goldork so I was trying really hard to resist being such a bitchfest faggot again but something about that nasal faggot brings out the ree in me.. and I just want to say one thing about it. It always bothered me that he never posted up the 3rd "lost" episode. He said he had the audio but only Lucas' voice recorded. I always thought this was an incredibly stupid and strange reason, especially since it had been established by then that the dipshit had no way of wrangling Lucas and he just rambled and screamed about whatever he wanted, so its not like Gold's sparse, ill prepared list of questions was of value

If the whole point is about displaying the cow's rage tantrums for general entertainment, why did it matter in any way if the audio was posted without Gold's voice. This comes off like it's his ego getting in the way, especially since he ignored our requests for the 'lost' episode/our questions regarding his reasons for not posting it. Then comments on his other videos asking about the 'lost' ep were ignored or deleted.

Then he SpaceEdge'd all the other episodes from his channel so no one can get entertainment from his various chimp outs again.. I guess it really was ego. And just being invested in Lucas and Lucas alone, for whatever dipshit faggoty reason. It's just so hard to believe anyone could have an ego about a channel with content gained from spoiling a blubbery, smelly, fat pedo with all the greasy fast food he screeched for

 

[ThomasAudley]

I 've shit up the thread enough with all my bullshit about Goldork so I was trying really hard to resist being such a bitchfest faggot again but something about that nasal faggot brings out the ree in me.. and I just want to say one thing about it. It always bothered me that he never posted up the 3rd "lost" episode. He said he had the audio but only Lucas' voice recorded. I always thought this was an incredibly stupid and strange reason, especially since it had been established by then that the dipshit had no way of wrangling Lucas and he just rambled and screamed about whatever he wanted, so its not like Gold's sparse, ill prepared list of questions was of value

If the whole point is about displaying the cow's rage tantrums for general entertainment, why did it matter in any way if the audio was posted without Gold's voice. This comes off like it's his ego getting in the way, especially since he ignored our requests for the 'lost' episode/our questions regarding his reasons for not posting it. Then comments on his other videos asking about the 'lost' ep were ignored or deleted.

Then he SpaceEdge'd all the other episodes from his channel so no one can get entertainment from his various chimp outs again.. I guess it really was ego. And just being invested in Lucas and Lucas alone, for whatever dipshit faggoty reason. It's just so hard to believe anyone could have an ego about a channel with content gained from spoiling a blubbery, smelly, fat pedo with all the greasy fast food he screeched for

Yeah something was definitely suspicious with the whole unfolding of events. Goldaor brought @Jeremiah the Bullfrog into his podcast as a mystery guest. Turns out he's just some guy that knows Goldaor from Bernie-Sanders-knows-where, crammed a ton of Wernology to prepare for the interview (perhaps in his free time in the garage before the school bus arrives), and then starts to post here. Fast forward to the LA catfish incident and Goldaor was still somewhat active. He claims he didn't set up the catfish, it was actually @BIG CATS (which based on SOFALAW intel had him mostly tracked down before his credible confession) who got drunk and bought a ticket. BIG CATS was in contact with Goldaor during this, because once Lucas arrives in LA so does Jeremiah (by phone anyway) to play the role of Mia's dad. Then Goldaor disappears to "focus on school" (during the winter break), Lucas starts getting free shit, Goldaor is actually still active on KF up until early last month, BIG CATS is mostly silent, and Jeremiah is still around. There's some faggotry afoot for sure, and it's detracting on the focus of Lucas being a big fat fucking retard.

 

[ClownBrew]

Apparently that particular Motel 6 is a "crystal palace" that accepts cash.

Also there is a clique of complete imbeciles who keep putting him up at the M6 on their accounts because they think enabling him is solid gold comedy.

 

[Krathnami]

You don’t need to spend your hard earned (and apparently disposable) cash just to own this fat faggot when he self-owns in front of the world on an hourly basis

 

[Fanatical Pragmatist]

View attachment 2067408
“I am not interested in the unhealthy, the unclean, the unfathomably stupid.” - Lucas Colby Werner

Edit: Lucas you wish you could be the like the old man Fidel Chadstro hanging out with all the genetically pure gen z Communists. On his right is Camila Vallejo voted the sexiest Communist of all time you don't see Fidel waving stacks of Benjamins in their faces, greedy money worshipper.

View attachment 2067458

View attachment 2067470View attachment 2067473

Never has 100 million dead looked so sexy!
She can seize my means of reproduction any time she wants

Yeah the last motel adventure brought one of my fav ever lucas stills, just look at this slovenly degenerate eating an entire tray of barbecue that’s been left out overnight while laying down naked, too fat and lazy to even sit up.

>rails against "greed"
>is literally a caricature of greed & sloth combined

 

[Maxxicus Callahan]

Never has 100 million dead looked so sexy!
She can seize my means of reproduction any time she wants

You can say that again, she is ridiculously good looking. I made up the voting thing btw they picked that award for sexiest communist in central committee

 

[IceQueen]

Never has 100 million dead looked so sexy!
She can seize my means of reproduction any time she wants

>rails against "greed"
>is literally a caricature of greed & sloth combined

And gluttony, you can’t forget that.

Caught this before he deleted it. The fucking moron truly expects people to either A) be able to read his mind, or B) have gone through his entire account. He said NOTHING about a matchmaker, matchmaking, or a matchmaking service (whatever the Hell that is) in this post, yet his reply to that comment was “read what I write”. And upon being informed that they had indeed read his post and commented based on that, he just deleted all of the comments.

Every day I’m still somehow shocked that it’s possible for someone to be THIS stupid and still be alive. Idk how it continues to baffle me but it does lol.

 

[ClownBrew]

Matchmaker matchmaker make me a match...find me a find...catch me a catfish

 

[Stafford Beer Bong]

All that begging and unimpressive cash flashing to not get laid once again.

Bonus round of older videos of Lucas also offering money for a date and getting nothing but laughed at, catfished, and featured on Tosh.0.

Attached the Tosh.0 bit if you've never seen it before.
View attachment 2068869

Great work adding in the older footage of Lucas being the same fat faggot he is now. It’s quite shocking to see how far he has aged and degenerated since the Tosh video. Compared to his videos now, that Tosh video makes Lucas seem almost normal.

Also, the fact the he is indeed wearing glasses in that video proves his claim to wanting his ideal zoom zoom to have good eyesight even more hypocritical. Frankly what a weird demand to ask for to begin with. Gives evidence to the theory he is narrowing his choice of mate insuring it is never fulfilled.

 

[Gaear Grimsrud]

Even with a fat stack in his pocket, all he can do is whine impotently into his phone for other guys to get him laid.

 

[klickitat]

This morning, I got to be thoroughly amused by, "I'm not asking you to hook me up" followed less than 2 seconds later by him asking someone to hook him up.

 

[ThomasAudley]

I guess we can infer from his midnight bigotposting that he did not get laid as planned.

 

[Mike R]

I know it's dumb to give much thought to the rantings of a crazy bum...but...giving the woman $100 would "technically" be prostitution he said. What? Under no laws I'm aware of would taking money to have lunch with someone be illegal (pathetic yes, but not illegal). Also, giving the money to a 3rd party to get someone to have lunch with him, under his mental framework, would make that person a pimp but that's ok/legal?

I also loved his rationalization that this wasn't misogynistic, it was a "business transaction"...and somehow, because of "reasons", that makes it ok and totally above board.

What pure insanity he's blessed us with today.

Lucas' latest brilliant idea is to give a Genz guy $100 for him to hook Lucas up with an introduction with a young hot Gen Z bae. Genz dudes are immature and while they might agree to introduce Lucas with a hot bae, after talking with Lucas for 5 minutes it is going to become clear to her that he might potentially pose a threat to her both, physically, and emotionally. Lucas would be better served offering the money to an older Gen X guy of his own age to set up an introduction with the girl he wants. I say this because Most (not all) older men do know how to speak with woman, and several of us do hook up with younger women in their 20s. I think Lucas' thinking on this subject is fundamentally flawed.

He see his best and only chance of meeting a young Bae is through the men of said generation. I disagree, his best chance of meeting a young hawt willing 20 something is through the guys of his own generation. Because Lucas doesn't know how to talk to and hook up with women, that is definitely not the case for many guys of his very own generation. Maybe it's because Gen X guys are real and don't use cheesy pick up lines with the word 'friend' in them, plus the majority of us don't come off rapey. Although I would feel sorry for any girl put into this situation, older men will inherently protect women who they are close to and friends with. Lucas' world view is that of only Gen Z guys with the baseball caps acting like wiggers are his only chance. I am not sure if he remembers or not, but he is describing many from our generation (Gen X) who were teenagers in the 90's that acted exacted the same way. Styles from earlier generations (in this case, teenage styles from GenX teenagers) many times become stylish again, Generation Z are acting, dressing, talking, adopting the very generation that Lucas comes from. But ultimately I suspect he was a dork then, and in 20 years he falls into that exact same category of loser.

 

[moseph.jartelli]

Lucas' latest brilliant idea is to give a Genz guy $100 for him to hook Lucas up with an introduction with a young hot Gen Z bae. Genz dudes are immature and while they might agree to introduce Lucas with a hot bae, after talking with Lucas for 5 minutes it is going to become clear to her that he might potentially pose a threat to her both, physically, and emotionally. Lucas would be better served offering the money to an older Gen X guy of his own age to set up an introduction with the girl he wants. I say this because Most (not all) older men do know how to speak with woman, and several of us do hook up with younger women in their 20s. I think Lucas' thinking on this subject is fundamentally flawed.

He see his best and only chance of meeting a young Bae is through the men of said generation. I disagree, his best chance of meeting a young hawt willing 20 something is through the guys of his own generation. Because Lucas doesn't know how to talk to and hook up with women, that is definitely not the case for many guys of his very own generation. Maybe it's because Gen X guys are real and don't use cheesy pick up lines with the word 'friend' in them, plus the majority of us don't come off rapey. Although I would feel sorry for any girl put into this situation, older men will inherently protect women who they are close to and friends with. Lucas' world view is that of only Gen Z guys with the baseball caps acting like wiggers are his only chance. I am not sure if he remembers or not, but he is describing many from our generation (Gen X) who were teenagers in the 90's that acted exacted the same way. Styles from earlier generations (in this case, teenage styles from GenX teenagers) many times become stylish again, Generation Z are acting, dressing, talking, adopting the very generation that Lucas comes from. But ultimately I suspect he was a dork then, and in 20 years he falls into that exact same category of loser.

You only get the money if at the end she wants his number and a 2nd date. And 100 bucks? Pretty sure most Gen X guys that COULD hook him up, wouldn't for such chump change.