Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial chicks

AbraCadaver

This is not how you run a whorehouse
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
i've seen a variation on this a couple times, but tried searching a bit to determine the origin - is that the entirety of his "game", his pick up line? to soft shoe mumble an introduction and stare gormlessly at the ground like a bashful 5 year old and wait for praise or something?
He has stated that’s exactly how he approached girls in school...he would tell them his name and then, by his own admission, instantly run out of things to say. So he would stare at the girl, his shoes, the sky, the girl again, do a smile (aka fear grimace), and then “shrug his shoulders in a funny way to try and make her laugh.” No wonder he came off dead mental.

He really expects the woman to be a mind reader and carry on the entire convo for him. Likely because that’s how all adults treated his tardarse. Walk up to an adult in school and stare at the ground and wait for them to quiz you on what you want. “What is it, Lucas? Are you tired? Do you have to go to the toilet? Do you want to go colour now? Did someone call you a bad name?”

He approaches talking to a woman the way he approaches all of life: everyone else should do everything for him and he just stands there flabbily and receives things.
 

wenttobermuda

Wernologist
kiwifarms.net
Yes, that’s pretty much his whole big plan.
This has been Lucas's "game," or method for seducing teen poonaner, since HS (which he never graduated from). This is how he'll steal Goldoar's bae, from his 2010 Reflections:

I became terrified of ever talking to pretty girls who seemed even remotely interesting unless they talked to me first. Every time I would approach them I had no idea what to say. I would just smile and then stare at my feet....

...So time would wear on and if I ever did initiate conversations with girls, typically I would begin by saying her name in the form of a question very boldly and confidently and just nodding. Then and I would smile and look at my feet. Up at the sky. Back at her back to my feet. I didn't know what else to do. They usually just stared at me awhile. I pretended not to notice. I made goofy shoulder gestures, thinking they might laugh. I fidgeted until they said something. "Are you okay?" "Yeah. I'm fine." "Are you sure you're fine? You don't seem fine. What's your name?" "Lucas. I'm Lucas. I uh..." "Okay." "I just..." "Yeah?" "Um. Well, I gotta go." Sometimes they would ask something else like "Gay?" And at first I'd say, "No. My name's Lucas. Who's Gay?"

After 2 and a half decades of practice, Lucas has mastered this routine.
 

telemeres69

kiwifarms.net
"How do you do fellow zoomers? I too speak your lingo"
I'd love to see someone genuinely argue Lucas is not autistic with these kinds of word salad
Can someone archive his most recent Instagram "memes"? I feel like I'm having a stroke from reading his fake-slang gibberish
 

Attachments

Troon Draugur

Stilgar of Troon. Facial Fremen-isation surgery
kiwifarms.net
"How do you do fellow zoomers? I too speak your lingo"
I'd love to see someone genuinely argue Lucas is not autistic with these kinds of word salad
Jesus tittyfucking Christ, what the actual fuck is he burbling about? I'd consider myself a reasonably adept linguist but that little collection of "memes" is bot-tier nonsense even by Lucas' wildly-impaired standards. I feel like I got physically dumber reading that.
 

Stafford Beer Bong

Jubee Flumper Pumpin’
kiwifarms.net
"How do you do fellow zoomers? I too speak your lingo"
I'd love to see someone genuinely argue Lucas is not autistic with these kinds of word salad
I don’t know about anyone else but the pictures of shirtless, pale skinned Lucas with his man boobs and MRSA scars making the come hither stare is about the creepiest, skeeviest image I’ve ever set my sight upon. I need to clorox my eyeballs to rid myself of that image.
 

WonderWino

kiwifarms.net
I don’t know about anyone else but the pictures of shirtless, pale skinned Lucas with his man boobs and MRSA scars making the come hither stare is about the creepiest, skeeviest image I’ve ever set my sight upon. I need to clorox my eyeballs to rid myself of that image.
Don't worry i've got you covered

bleach.jpg


If you think the memes are bad now just wait until his latest pickup line becomes 'everything is made in china, except for long telomere babies. they're made in vachina'
 
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MeganDodgedABullet

kiwifarms.net
Goldy needs to up his game or he will be seen as the Wern's bitchboy and enabler.
A few questions like the kiwi-facebookers who brought up "not in the cards" last time are called for.
Ask him - how are you non-sexist when you posted gross details about your sex life with a named ex-girlfriend?
Isn't your "criticse or disagree and your are a nazi/republican" line the same as the meme "everyone who disagrees with me is Hitler" we see on the internet? It's a straw-nazi.

going back to college? Remember how miserable you were cos the girls wouldnt engage with you?


A savvy prepared host could milk this cow like crazy.
 

telemeres69

kiwifarms.net
Marijuana is not medication Lucas, you should know this by how insane you are in your videos when you smoke multiple joints daily. I doubt he actually will take the medication as this means admitting he is mentally ill. If he does however, he won't stick with it long term since Lucas doesn't commit to anything beyond his love quest
The Spokane Pedo Freak says he decided to get back on his meds. As far as the deranged pedo freak Lucas Colby Werner, meds or no meds he's sealed his doom.

View attachment 1418965
 

GleamingTheQ-Bert

Christian Slaterkin
kiwifarms.net
Marijuana is not medication Lucas, you should know this by how insane you are in your videos when you smoke multiple joints daily. I doubt he actually will take the medication as this means admitting he is mentally ill. If he does however, he won't stick with it long term since Lucas doesn't commit to anything beyond his love quest
Yeah is that what he meant?

I thought he might have been trying to be cute, and meant his joints when he said medication, but with Lucas of course it's very hard to tell any direct meanings from anything, and as people already said even if he had meant his prescription medication, a promise to start is no guarantee that he would stick with anything, or even start.
 

wenttobermuda

Wernologist
kiwifarms.net
Lucas is not going to start taking insulin again, to keep his toes a little bit longer. Maybe ward off the diabetic dick infections, too.

Lucas is not going to resume a careful regiment of anti-psychotics, to conform his conduct to what is generally expected of adults.

No, Lucas is making jokes about marijuana being his "medicine."

Because he is plenty good.

And there is nothing wrong with him.
 

mothman96

kiwifarms.net
Yeah is that what he meant?

I thought he might have been trying to be cute, and meant his joints when he said medication, but with Lucas of course it's very hard to tell any direct meanings from anything, .............................
No, Lucas is making jokes about marijuana being his "medicine."

Because he is plenty good.

And there is nothing wrong with him.
Yup, he clarified his "med" is weed.

1593542848308.png
 

WonderWino

kiwifarms.net
View attachment 1418960

???

(Rates self Optimistic)
I can think of four possibilities for that statement:

1. By 'meds' he is referring to weed and is trying to be ironic or funny or some stupid shit, hence smoking a joint in the pic. Not to mention he's proving to be an even bigger idiot because weed is a big no no for schizos and will make him more unstable
2. His behavior has been noticed enough by people at HOC to complain enough that HOC made an issue of it with whoever his tard wrangler is and threats were made to go back on the meds or he'll be hospitalized for his outbursts and forced to take them
3. Lucas actually had some degree of self realization and figured out he really does have a mental illness and that being unmedicated is both harming his mental state and is a contributing to his not finding a zoomer bae
4. He is lying and saying he is, not because he believes they are necessary but because he thinks he is being clever by saying it so word gets out that he is 'back on his meds' and therefore is 'good' dating material

I think it goes without saying that option 3 is extremely unlikely as it would require accepting criticism and self reflection. Option 4 requires a greater level of intelligence to concieive of such a plan than lucas has, not that it would work anyway

I suspect 1 and 2 are about equally possible. Given all the comments in his direction during his last few videos I wouldn't be surprised to find out his behavior is starting to be disruptive or is leading to others being disruptive. He may have even tried to report people for 'harassing him' during his videos only to have it backfire on him, be told the admin agrees with them and to get back on the meds and stop being disruptive or else he'd be kicked out. Fits his MO and they do have a known history of kicking him out, plus their patience has its limits for people like lucas
 
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