Operation Tupacalypse (minor Twitter update) Eli currently working on a farm, complains about it. -

[DeagleDad420]

Starting a new thread because Tupacalypse has been bone-dry of updates lately and I'm bored - if anyone thinks this is dumb I'll merge it into the megathread

So, to recap, we haven't heard from Eli since his "conspiracy" video nearly two weeks ago where he was staying at some "stoner bunker" shack. Finally, he releases a new tweet on the 9th:

...Not very enlightening, as retarded and hilarious as it is. He also retweets one of Danny Deveagle's tweets:

Then, yesterday, we get a new update with actual substance:

Analysis:
"Tryin 2 Make Me Do All Thiis Work" originally made me think he's WOOFing or something, or just made an informal agreement with some farmer of "hey if you let me crash here I'll work your fields for 8 hours a day" - I knew a few poor hippie types in college who used to fund their road trips by doing the same thing, essentially they're not paying for lodging at all, at the cost of some extra labor, so Eli might be doing that, but on the other hand that seems out of character for him because I don't think he'd ever volunteer for hard physical labor.

During the JOOOOOOOSH call Jace said Eli was staying with his grandparents but we don't strictly know if he is still with them right now (and his grandparents own the farm) or if he left his grandparent's care and went to a farm instead for some reason - nonetheless, given the fact that I don't think he'd ever volunteer for labor, my pet theory right now is he's staying with his grandparents and they own a farm or something.

One more really interesting thing is "Thank The Gods" - I would just say it was a typo, and he added an extra S, if it wasn't for "the Gods" instead of "Gods". So Eli is apparently either a polytheist or he's making some obscure runescape joke or something that I don't know about. If he IS a polythiest, I really want to know two things:

1. 
   
   
   • Is he Pagan or Wiccan or some shit? I really doubt it's Hinduism or Shintoism, so that pretty much leaves some form of neo-paganism.
   • How the fuck does this work with the two of them given Jace's pro-Catholic attitude? Or does Jace just not care? I mean I doubt Kyle is a Catholic given his weird views on "THE UNIVERSE" etc. but Jace didn't seem to get upset about that either, at least not on an ethical/religious basis.

Disregard the above rambling about "The Gods", apparently I'm literally the only one who thinks this so I'm probably just grasping at straws at this point

That's all I've got right now. Maybe I'm just over-analyzing because I'm starved for content, but there it is.

 

[BT 075]

So basically, Eli is now more interesting then Jace. He's kind of a breakout character, messing about in the Middle East, riding camels, going on secret missions and shit while Jace sits at home and turns all sad and Evangelical.

 

[Morbid Boredom]

Starting a new thread because Tupacalypse has been bone-dry of updates lately and I'm bored - if anyone thinks this is dumb I'll merge it into the megathread

So, to recap, we haven't heard from Eli since his "conspiracy" video nearly two weeks ago where he was staying at some "stoner bunker" shack. Finally, he releases a new tweet on the 9th:

...Not very enlightening, as retarded and hilarious as it is. He also retweets one of Danny Deveagle's tweets:

Then, yesterday, we get a new update with actual substance:

Analysis:
"Tryin 2 Make Me Do All Thiis Work" originally made me think he's WOOFing or something, or just made an informal agreement with some farmer of "hey if you let me crash here I'll work your fields for 8 hours a day" - I knew a few poor hippie types in college who used to fund their road trips by doing the same thing, essentially they're not paying for lodging at all, at the cost of some extra labor, so Eli might be doing that, but on the other hand that seems out of character for him because I don't think he'd ever volunteer for hard physical labor.

During the JOOOOOOOSH call Jace said Eli was staying with his grandparents but we don't strictly know if he is still with them right now (and his grandparents own the farm) or if he left his grandparent's care and went to a farm instead for some reason - nonetheless, given the fact that I don't think he'd ever volunteer for labor, my pet theory right now is he's staying with his grandparents and they own a farm or something.

One more really interesting thing is "Thank The Gods" - I would just say it was a typo, and he added an extra S, if it wasn't for "the Gods" instead of "Gods". So Eli is apparently either a polytheist or he's making some obscure runescape joke or something that I don't know about. If he IS a polythiest, I really want to know two things:

1. Is he Pagan or Wiccan or some shit? I really doubt it's Hinduism or Shintoism, so that pretty much leaves some form of neo-paganism.
2. How the fuck does this work with the two of them given Jace's pro-Catholic attitude? Or does Jace just not care? I mean I doubt Kyle is a Catholic given his weird views on "THE UNIVERSE" etc. but Jace didn't seem to get upset about that either, at least not on an ethical/religious basis.

That's all I've got right now. Maybe I'm just over-analyzing because I'm starved for content, but there it is.

Well, if he's staying with Grandparents, that explains the woman with an American accent asking after him.

Eli doesn't have a structured religion, it must be a Runescape thing. Most fantasy games have polytheist religions.

 

[Dr. Meme]

For the gods thing I think maybe he heard it somewhere and thought it was a cool thing to say, I don't think he's strictly polytheistic. I always assumed he was atheist, but I could be wrong.

 

[The Mass Debater]

1. How the fuck does this work with the two of them given Jace's pro-Catholic attitude? Or does Jace just not care? I mean I doubt Kyle is a Catholic given his weird views on "THE UNIVERSE" etc. but Jace didn't seem to get upset about that either, at least not on an ethical/religious basis.

Has Jace ever cared that much what other people believe? So long as you aren't an evil Muslim or a member of Pastor Faggot's flock he will surely respond one of two ways:

Dude that's sick what buffs do you get?

Can we just play Xbox now?

 

[Arctic]

"The Gods" probably refers to to Saradomin, Guthix and Zamorak.

 

[BT 075]

"The Gods" probably refers to to Saradomin, Guthix and Zamorak.

More like...

 

[XYZpdq]

Maybe he's on a kibbutz? Do they still do those?

 

[Le Bateleur]

So what I took from this is that contact with Eli's dick will cause a burning sensation.

Guess Jace was right about the STDs...

 

[Flowers For Sonichu]

Danny Deveagle is the biggest tryhard ever

 

[Mauvman Shuffleboard]

Starting a new thread because Tupacalypse has been bone-dry of updates lately and I'm bored - if anyone thinks this is dumb I'll merge it into the megathread

So, to recap, we haven't heard from Eli since his "conspiracy" video nearly two weeks ago where he was staying at some "stoner bunker" shack. Finally, he releases a new tweet on the 9th:

...Not very enlightening, as retarded and hilarious as it is. He also retweets one of Danny Deveagle's tweets:

Then, yesterday, we get a new update with actual substance:

Analysis:
"Tryin 2 Make Me Do All Thiis Work" originally made me think he's WOOFing or something, or just made an informal agreement with some farmer of "hey if you let me crash here I'll work your fields for 8 hours a day" - I knew a few poor hippie types in college who used to fund their road trips by doing the same thing, essentially they're not paying for lodging at all, at the cost of some extra labor, so Eli might be doing that, but on the other hand that seems out of character for him because I don't think he'd ever volunteer for hard physical labor.

During the JOOOOOOOSH call Jace said Eli was staying with his grandparents but we don't strictly know if he is still with them right now (and his grandparents own the farm) or if he left his grandparent's care and went to a farm instead for some reason - nonetheless, given the fact that I don't think he'd ever volunteer for labor, my pet theory right now is he's staying with his grandparents and they own a farm or something.

One more really interesting thing is "Thank The Gods" - I would just say it was a typo, and he added an extra S, if it wasn't for "the Gods" instead of "Gods". So Eli is apparently either a polytheist or he's making some obscure runescape joke or something that I don't know about. If he IS a polythiest, I really want to know two things:

1. Is he Pagan or Wiccan or some shit? I really doubt it's Hinduism or Shintoism, so that pretty much leaves some form of neo-paganism.
2. How the fuck does this work with the two of them given Jace's pro-Catholic attitude? Or does Jace just not care? I mean I doubt Kyle is a Catholic given his weird views on "THE UNIVERSE" etc. but Jace didn't seem to get upset about that either, at least not on an ethical/religious basis.

That's all I've got right now. Maybe I'm just over-analyzing because I'm starved for content, but there it is.

There are two places in this world, 1) Where Eli is and 2) Where Eli's mom thinks he is and right now he's both, or maybe neither. Going back to the call between Jace and Null he seems to be talking about two separate places but refers to them as "over there" and "there." Here's the Eli portion of the transcript with location type phrases underlined.

"Well, yeah but he's staying with his fucking, gran-gran-grandfather and right now I think he's in a precarious situation because his Mom doesn't even know that he, he he's over there because if she knew then she would fucking freak the fuck out because, he was supposed to be there for like the last few months and he's just been sitting and like whoring around and just sleeping with a bunch of gross hookers and I think he has an STD now or something because he told me on the phone. He's just over there and what happened was it got really complicated and I don't want to get into it right now but basically- I can't contact him because that would put his life in peril because if he gets kicked out, then he could be forced to United States..."

So that leaves a few possibilities
1) Eli is at his grandfather's in Israel and was supposed to be there for the last few months (either from the beginning of the operation or maybe from the point it stopped being a mission) but his mom thinks he's somewhere else
2) Eli is not at his grandfather's, Eli's mom thinks he's at his grandfather's (in America) but doesn't know he's actually "over there" (in Israel)
3) Jace is insane and the only place we know Eli is for sure is Runescape
4) It's all fake and Eli was entirely computer generated this whole time
5) Other stuff I never thought about

- If Eli is supposed to be with a grandparent it's a bit odd that Eli's parents wouldn't have called them at least once in the past 4 months, but they might just be apathetic
- We know that Eli has been in contact with his parents and has led them to believe he is definitely somewhere
- If Eli is not supposed to be with his grandparents in Israel it's also odd that they wouldn't try to contact his parents after he suddenly showed up unannounced, but Eli the super spy might have talked his way out of that
- Eli only mentioned this farm 114 days into the mission so he probably got there within the last couple of weeks

The way I see it, since his mom apparently doesn't know he's "over there" and would freak out if she knew, at the very least he's not in the same place as he claimed to be if Jace was telling the truth. Hard to put too much faith in manic Jace driving at 90mph though, so really anything's possible.

---

As for the gods thing, even though there are like 20 in Runescape as far as I remember they weren't worshiped as a pantheon. Aside from the Islams, I don't think I've really seen Jace give too much of a shit about the religions of others so I don't think he'd have a problem with Eli being a polytheist of any flavor. I'm personally leaning toward the McDonaldland pantheon.

Grimace is my lord and savior

 

[BillRiley]

From what little I know of Eli I can't imagine him being more than vaguely interested in religion, nor can I picture him willingly picking avacados or milking the cows. Looks to me like the ugly yutz is spending all his time sponging wifi at the local McSalmonella. Any bets on how long GrandpaEli is going to put up with his Schmendrick grandson?

 

[Roosechu]

My guess: Eli got rused up by da jewz and ended up working in a kibbutz.

 

[GREEDY FIREMAN]

Off topic:
Why is Grimace giving the photographer the finger?

 

[Tookie]

Runescape makes all the ladies moist.

 

[Burned Man]

Off topic:
Why is Grimace giving the photographer the finger?

He is trying to be edgy. You can tell by the way his hat is turned sideways.

Travels across the entire world to a new exciting exotic place, still goes to McDonalds. I imagine his lack of wifi must be cutting into his Runescape hours, freeing up more time for farm work.

 

[Uzumaki]

One more really interesting thing is "Thank The Gods" - I would just say it was a typo, and he added an extra S, if it wasn't for "the Gods" instead of "Gods". So Eli is apparently either a polytheist or he's making some obscure runescape joke or something that I don't know about. If he IS a polythiest, I really want to know two things:

1. Is he Pagan or Wiccan or some shit? I really doubt it's Hinduism or Shintoism, so that pretty much leaves some form of neo-paganism.
2. How the fuck does this work with the two of them given Jace's pro-Catholic attitude? Or does Jace just not care? I mean I doubt Kyle is a Catholic given his weird views on "THE UNIVERSE" etc. but Jace didn't seem to get upset about that either, at least not on an ethical/religious basis.

That's all I've got right now. Maybe I'm just over-analyzing because I'm starved for content, but there it is.

I think you're reading waaaay too far into the "Gods" comment.

I'm an atheist, about as far from a polytheist as you can get, and I invoke "the Gods" whenever I'm using an expression that personifies the universe (just because if you say "God" people tend to take it as a statement of faith instead of a metaphor). In theater circles it's pretty common to refer to "the Gods" or specific gods (like "the Comedy God") in place of references to a monotheistic god, and it has nothing to do with religious belief. And that's completely discounting the arch nerds who refer to everything in fantasy terms, such as "What in the nine hells of baator is going on here?"

 

[The Dude]

Eli, you're fucking Israeli hookers. They moan because you pay them.

 

[Optimus Prime]

My take on "the Gods" thing:

A keyboard has the "s" key to the left of the "d"

It's probably a typo and he posted this from a smartphone or something that auto-corrected.

It's also interesting that ALL the words are capitalized. Was he doing this before?

 

[A-№1]

One more really interesting thing is "Thank The Gods" - I would just say it was a typo, and he added an extra S, if it wasn't for "the Gods" instead of "Gods". So Eli is apparently either a polytheist or he's making some obscure runescape joke or something that I don't know about. If he IS a polythiest, I really want to know two things:

I think you're reading waaaay too far into the "Gods" comment.

☝This.

"Thank the Gods" is a common expression in a lot of fantasy media, used whenever the authors want to emphasize that the characters are "not Christian." I don't play Runescape, but with a name like "Runescape" I would not be at all surprised if it's also said in it somewhere. Probably a lot. Eli could have picked it up just about anywhere, though. It's said in Conan the Barbarian, a movie. Also in God of War, a video game. Henchman 21 uses the expression a few times in Venture Brothers, a television show. I would mention examples from books but I don't think Eli is much of a reader.

Basically Eli wants to say: "Thank God for McDonalds" (because the farm he isn't working much on probably isn't feeding him much in return). But he wants to differentiate himself from all the Jews and other religious people around him, so he latched onto the easiest substitution he could readily think of from all the fantasy entertainment he consumes. I really don't think it's any more complicated than that, because with lolcows the stupidest explanation is usually the correct one.