Morrissey has a novel out now. -

[CWCissey]

And by all accounts it is terrible. It's about a relay team that is haunted by demons, no this is not like a Smiths style demons, with brooding and self-depreciating regret, an actual fucking demon.

It also confirms how celibate Morrissey is (or he's had some really freaky sex!) in one paragraph.

Eliza and Ezra rolled together into the one giggling snowball of full-figured copulation, screaming and shouting as they playfully bit and pulled at each other in a dangerous and clamorous rollercoaster coil of sexually violent rotation with Eliza's breasts barrel-rolled across Ezra's howling mouth and the pained frenzy of his bulbous salutation extenuating his excitement as it smacked its way into every muscle of Eliza's body except for the otherwise central zone.

Just what the fuck?

 

[AnOminous]

Holy fuck man that's My Immortal-tier.

 

[Gaol]

And by all accounts it is terrible. It's about a relay team that is haunted by demons, no this is not like a Smiths style demons, with brooding and self-depreciating regret, an actual fucking demon.

It also confirms how celibate Morrissey is (or he's had some really freaky sex!) in one paragraph.



Just what the fuck?

Let me get out my thesaurus and write whatever comes up to make it sound fancy and high class.

 

[Le Bateleur]

http://www.prospectmagazine.co.uk/a...-new-novel-list-of-the-lost-review-the-smiths

“A trip to the local mall in search of strip plywood is to look suffering directly in the eyes”

 

[Dr. Joel Fleischman]

“I once met an ill-tempered monarch in Europe, and I explained to him that I had no interest in the female form”

This must be how Joan of Arc felt.

 

[cumrobbery]

This makes sex sound like some sort of goddamn scientific manual

 

[CWCissey]

This makes sex sound like some sort of goddamn scientific manual

No it makes it sound really surreal. Barrel rolling tits? And just where is Ezra sticking his dick?

 

[Ruin]

Ty Morrissey for new custom title.

 

[VLAD]

I always felt similar to Henry Rollins with regards to Morrissey. A lot of his creative work would be greatly improved if someone set him on fire.

 

[CWCissey]

I always felt similar to Henry Rollins with regards to Morrissey. A lot of his creative work would be greatly improved if someone set him on fire.

Nah, what Morrissey needs is the controlling influence of Johnny Marr.

 

[Arrosoir]

Nah, what Morrissey needs is the controlling influence of Johnny Marr.

Mick Ronson also tends to produce good results.

 

[bradsternum]

I like his music, but he's a pretentious fuck who needs to stop thinking he's anything more than a pop star.

 

[Dudeofteenage]

To quote the Grauniad, "has Morrissey ever had sex"?

 

[AnOminous]

To quote the Grauniad, "has Morrissey ever had sex"?

I think we have a resounding answer to that now.

 

[Captain Cid]

I'm surprised Morrissey isn't a character in his own book. He does think quite highly of himself, despite having to rely on actual musicians to write all his songs for him.

 

[CWCissey]

I'm surprised Morrissey isn't a character in his own book. He does think quite highly of himself, despite having to rely on actual musicians to write all his songs for him.

You never read his autobiography did you?

 

[Captain Cid]

You never read his autobiography did you?

No. You know what I think of Morrissey as a person. My love for Strangeways Here We Come does not translate into admiration for that self important wanker.

 

[Dudeofteenage]

I think we have a resounding answer to that now.

The most charitable answer is that he's never had heterosexual sex, but even that is a stretch.

 

[CWCissey]

No. You know what I think of Morrissey as a person. My love for Strangeways Here We Come does not translate into admiration for that self important wanker.

Eh fair enough, I will say his autobiography is hilarious though.

The most charitable answer is that he's never had heterosexual sex, but even that is a stretch.

It's also accurate. Moz says he's had sex with two guys and that's it. So even though he claims to be 'humasexual' (ie finding all humans attractive), he's more homosexual.

 

[CWCissey]

And List Of The Lost has been nominated for an award.

http://www.manchestereveningnews.co...r-news/morrissey-bad-sex-award-novel-10464207