Most ridiculously unfunny/annoying DSP moments? -

[SkippyLongbottom]

-When he bitches that a game is "work" or a "job". It's usually anything that requires more than two braincells or challenges him in anyway.
-Tip auditing.
-Constant shout-outs
-Begging for contributions (okay this can be entertaining or annoying depending on the circumstances).
-His prestreams.
-Virtue Signaling at opportune moments.

 

[Pretty Boy Extremism]

When he bitches that a game is "work" or a "job". It's usually anything that requires more than two braincells or challenges him in anyway.

To add to that, this one's recent but it's still really annoying, when he says that those games are bad for streaming and bad for a "khantent creator" like him. Not only does he just not want to admit that he sucks at that game, but it's absolutely not true because there are no "bad games" for a khantent creator. There are streamers bigger than him who were successful while playing those games and there are streamers who are successful streaming the most inane fucking games imaginable, every time he made the complaint of "bad games not made for khantent creators" I looked up whether someone's streaming the spreadsheet simulator that is Football Manager at that very moment and there's always 2 Brits on Twitch playing it who get 800-1.2k views which is much more successful than Dave.

What I'm saying is that he's a shitty khantent creator, as if that's news.

 

[Gamergirl Cleanup Crew]

It’s the little things.

When he recognizes a joke and forces out a “nuhuh” so we know he gets it.

The smug self-satisfied way he says GOT EM! Very nice! after killing a boss. Not sure why but it gets me infuckingcensed.

The weird baby voice he uses with Jasper. I think he used it once while complimenting Khet on stream too and it made my skin crawl.

 

[Wurstbrot]

When he recognizes a joke and forces out a “nuhuh” so we know he gets it.

He's an insecure little piglet with a tiny wiener. Either he laughs at his own jokes or he continously kicks it till its dead, ruining it in the process. Phil, just drop your joke and shut up. This is how you actually make it funny.

His random goat-laughs when nothing happens are the very same.

 

[Anal birth]

Whenever Phil gets confronted with the truth. The way he flips things is absolutely infuriating.

In the "Its the guy" video, one of them says he was caught masturbating in front of children and Phil responded by saying something along the lines of "YEAH I'M CONSTANTLY MASTURBATING INFRONT OF THOUSANDS OF CHILDREN ACK ACK ACK". For Phil, his response becomes what they actually said and it makes sense why. Its much easier to defend that stance than the original one, that he masturbated on stream.

He does this pretty much every day but I've been seeing him ramp it up in regards to the departnering on twitch. He seems to have got it into his head that he had to be constantly doing something as bad as the Isaac Himmler stuff every day to get departnered. The guy signed a contract that said he could lose his partnership at any time but he knows better, I guess.

He also loves to use the Motte and Bailey fallacy (or the DSPhillacy as I think of it).

 

[Sparkletor 2.0]

When will Phil lose his house>
[ ] 2019
[ ] 2020
[ ] 2021
[ ] Phil doesn't own a house. He has a middle unit condo.

 

[strandedcastaway]

His many "I'm about to lie" catchphrases that he falls back on 100 times every conversation, like "Being totally honest and upfront," "the truth of the matter is," "behind the scenes".

His total inability to take responsibility for anything, ever, crossed with the fact he thinks saying "I've changed from how I was 10 years ago" is him taking responsibility for something.

His constant flipping between SJW "new Phil" and Internet badass "fuck those SJWs and sissies" Phil depending on what suits him at the moment.

His total refusal to do anything, at all, for his fans, like update his streams or camera, provide some sort of reward for donations/Patreon, ANYTHING that involves effort. Totally perplexing how someone totally reliant on fan donations will do absolutely zero for those same people.

 

[FriendlyPrimarina]

I hate to turn this into a "bitch about detractors thread," but I have Sonic endures on in the background and I hate Torres' throat clear. You're focusing on something in the foreground and then you hear, "HUEH-hum." Easily as annoying as any sound Phil makes.

 

[Alxmir23]

when he speaks about food and tries to brag about eating homemade stuff.....like its a fucking hard thing to cook basic shit

when it comes to food,hes so damn easy to please and impressionable

Bananas in the cake batter? get the fuck outta here with that gourmet shit

 

[Wingnut]

Probably how every time anything remotely romantic, let alone sexual, happens in a video game he always has the same reaction of "OH MY GAAAAAAAWWWDDDHHH, this is SO STUPID!".

It's like he's trying to convince his parents he's a pure boy and sex is icky.

 

[mr.moon1488]

I wouldn't say it's unfunny, since it normally leads to a hilarious fail, but it's extremely obnoxious when he doesn't read any tooltips or tutorials and ends up struggling with something simple for well over an hour when it could have just taken him 10 seconds to read a couple of lines of text.

 

[BTK]

Probably how every time anything remotely romantic, let alone sexual, happens in a video game he always has the same reaction of "OH MY GAAAAAAAWWWDDDHHH, this is SO STUPID!".

It's like he's trying to convince his parents he's a pure boy and sex is icky.

Especially since he switched so suddenly to that from his old reaction during that stuff where he'd talk like 12 year old "HOLY SHIT LOOK AT HER BOOBIES"

I always think how weird he is now and remember his Metal Gear Solid 3 playthrough.

 

[Iron Hamster]

Most ridiculously unfunny/annoying DSP moments?​

All of them [/endthread]

 

[Troonos]

His constant rebuking of "toxic negativity" and claims that his streams are all about positivity, when literally every moment of his stream is a childish temper tantrum where he insults his viewers, blames game devs for his inability to play, whines about his imaginary financial difficulty, and cries about "harmful detractor memes". His entire streaming career is constant negativity and toxicity. What a hypocritical, lying piece of trash.

 

[Glowie]

From early days "Haha stupid jew" thing that he pulled that got his ass kicked out from one buisiness opportunity.
Precious piggy DSP is funny in a way he never wanted to, a delusional malignant narcissist with delusions grandeur who is off his meds

 

[Xenomorph]

GTA playthroughs and the greedy fuck will not have the radio in game at all because MUH YOUTUBE MONIES. Also him singing poorly and maing up paroy lyrics ways somehow has to do with anal sex and dick sucking.
Phil should come out the closet June is pride month.

 

[SauceRyuKen]

-Thing happens- Oh thing just happened SEE THAT?
-Tells us what the game literally just told us- So that's what happened, YOU SEE?
-Reads an item description- So a buttplug is an item you use to stick up your own ass, SEE THAT?
-Okay? Awright? Okay? Fair enough? Sound good? Okay? Okaaay? Awright? Awright!- Just fucking behead yourself with your defense hatchet in Minecraft Phil.
-A waterfall, duhuhu! A whale, heh, it's cool! A spaceship, huhuhuhu!- So fuckin' funny, man. Look, a gouty scammer with a receding hairline! Honhon!
-*soundtrack plays* OHOHOHOOOO, LALALALAAAAA!- You know, some stuff like learning the lyrics to Baka Mitai can be funny even if the dude singing it botches it, because well, at least he learned the actual Japanese lyrics. What is the fucking point of OHOHOHO LALALAAAing over a soundtrack? What does it even add? Does Derich like it? Does anyone like it? I don't know if it's just another one of those things Phil does to be annoying like the bottle crunches.

Commenting on every single piece of room decoration he sees in-game. Again, purely for stalling. He's picked this up from Aris, who sometimes stops to stare at shit and say whether he sees a graphical improvement over last gen or not. Thing is Aris doesn't let his whole stream be running commentary peppered with EVEN MORE running commentary over every chair, painting, toilet, rug, mirror and bobblehead figure he sees in game. Phil however does, and it's fucking nuts.

His "insightful" plot recaps. Yeah dude, everyone can read a plot recap online and then recall it live on stream. Big ups. His gin brain is often bad at remembering details, too, so he frequently misunderstands shit and adds absolutely nothing. It's just "This is what has happened so far." Literally just stalling for a couple minutes of controller down sermon spewing. Him being unable to remember that Ethan was established to be a molded fairly early in Re7 for example, and selling it as a completely new discovery that he just pieced together. Inspector Snorto on the case.

Walking instead of running in games. Specially when it's something like Returnal. Pure stall with no fucking reason. Phil doubles down on the annoyance factor when he says "There's NO WAY Resident Evil 8 is a 4 hour affair on normal, dudes! It took me SEVENTEEN HOURS!" like he wasn't intentionally stalling like a motherfucker and item hunting like an autismo. Trying to pass off his own bottom of the barrel gameplay as something normal or acceptable. When it's been proven that he takes at LEAST twice as long as a normal player to do a cherrypicked content and main story run of any given game.

In general, 2021 Phil makes Yung Pigroach look like a competent streamer by comparison. His retarded schedule and insanely long playtime makes it impossible to get into the game through Phil. Ironically, it makes him an excellent shill. You just wanna slap the controller off his hands and do it for him, like when your grandpa is trying to fiddle with Facebook and taking far too long.

 

[Jeff Boomhauer]

DSP's singing is always awful. What's worse is, he thinks he's both a good singer AND funny at making parody lyrics.

I think the very moment that made me a mentally ill detractor was the Metal Gear Solid 1 TIHYDP, where he constantly sang the KWO theme.

 

[Prince Lotor]

DSP's singing is always awful. What's worse is, he thinks he's both a good singer AND funny at making parody lyrics.

I think the very moment that made me a mentally ill detractor was the Metal Gear Solid 1 TIHYDP, where he constantly sang the KWO theme.

"Yo! Grab my balls. Stick yo' fingah up my asshole, bitch!"

 

[TheGoutburglar]

Walking instead of running in games. Specially when it's something like Returnal. Pure stall with no fucking reason. Phil doubles down on the annoyance factor when he says "There's NO WAY Resident Evil 8 is a 4 hour affair on normal, dudes! It took me SEVENTEEN HOURS!" like he wasn't intentionally stalling like a motherfucker and item hunting like an autismo. Trying to pass off his own bottom of the barrel gameplay as something normal or acceptable. When it's been proven that he takes at LEAST twice as long as a normal player to do a cherrypicked content and main story run of any given game.

Typical Phil, gotta have his cake and eat it too. He stalls in order to keep streaming a game for more days, because that means more tips in his oddly-shaped head, but he also hates being made fun of, and one of the things contributing to that is his exponentially longer playtime compared to damn near everybody else.

And of course, instead of changing to fit reality, he just denies that the average is what it is. A lot of people think pride is his greatest sin, but I'm going with laziness, or "sloth". It wins out a lot more often than anything else does, including his need to soothe his ego, like he does when saying that there's no way RE8 is an eight hour game. That's the easy way out, after all, and it leads to more insults, so it's also counter-productive, but he's not about to change tactics because it means doing work. He clearly hates that even more than he hates being laughed at.