I see a lot of the dark triad in her and I think it's fascinating to watch.
Yes all of this but remember under all that, Amber is a dimwit, a retard, a dummy. Her lack of intelligence can't be entirely blamed on the methheads and the system. She's just plain stupid as well. She was never going to find true meaning anyway.Direct result of childhood abandonment. Look up the term “individuation”. She never went through this process, thus you see a 30 something year old woman with no serious goals, no real identity, no long-lasting relationships etc.
Bad parenting can really fuck you up. On some level, I do feel sorry for her. Because I know she will likely die without having found true meaning to her existence. A good psychologist could help sort out her issues, once and for all. But that would require a lot of work and soul searching on her end. To me that’s the tragedy of people like this; They could get help and live fulfilled lives but give up on themselves.
Yes all of this but remember under all that, Amber is a dimwit, a retard, a dummy. Her lack of intelligence can't be entirely blamed on the methheads and the system. She's just plain stupid as well. She was never going to find true meaning anyway.
Because no normal person becomes 600 (sorry, 560) pounds JUST from liking food.
There have been people on 600lb life who had both parents in their life, who catered to their every whim and had a loving upbringing (if a bit spoilt). They were just pushy and greedy.
Obviously in most cases something deeper causes the food addiction but there are truly some folk out there who are nothing more than gluttons surrounded by enablers.
It's a real thing to just be a fat bastard.
Being somebody brought up in a similar environment to amber and having a lot of similar traits as her, I hope it isn't power leveling if I just offer a couple insights into the behavior so others can understand.Wow! Nature vs nurture is a decent example of an issue that can really be argued from both sides. There isn’t a real answer here, but I’ll throw a few thoughts out there.
I think Amber, as a young girl, was born into a group of immature, unprepared, under educated folks, who had no business throwing lives out into the wild without any stability or training. Impulsive, unbalanced, selfish. I could write a book about what I think of Kristine & George.
As a child & into adolescents Amber is there observing her family’s hi-jinx. Mom & Dads police contact, domestic violence, so on. She learns quickly that what you say in serious situations is never what happened. Amber learns to appeal to people’s empathy & play up how impoverished she is. She’s learns from her mom that you play a helpless damsel for the cops. She tells tales of abuse at school to slide on homework. She learned that on top of getting out of obligations, you also get sympathy & attention. She did not learn however how to reach out for help or even recognize when she should be trying to. Holy crap, George & Kristine created a monster.
There was a brief time period for Amber to say, that’s how I was raised. I didn’t know anything different. Therefore, my past behavior is not up for scrutiny. I did bad things because I didn’t understand. I do now & that behavior is over. It would be so nice to see this. An actual positive outcome grown up out of the drunken ruckus raised by George twenty some years ago. I won’t be holding my breath.
Bottom Line- I feel Amber had some inherent deceptive qualities, & that Amber naturally had a knack for bending perceptions, or being able to ‘sell’ a certain spin. However it was her environment & parenting that taught Amber how to weaponize emotional deception & manipulation ie- you’re getting pulled over- quick start crying. Amber learned deception & manipulation for personal gain from her parents, and decides to start behaving this way on any given day just to do it. Purely for attention.
That was an interesting read but you could have given us the same information without saying it was you. We wouldn't have known whether it was you, your brother, your therapist, or you're the therapist, but that's irrelevant because you're correct. The truth doesn't need to be supported by anecdote. This is just friendly advice from a young kiwi to a baby kiwi.Being somebody brought up in a similar environment to amber and having a lot of similar traits as her, I hope it isn't power leveling if I just offer a couple insights into the behavior so others can understand.
The manipulation and lying is a survival mechanism and it gets engrained so deeply in childhood that you don't even always realize that is what you are doing even in a person such as myself that has been told I have a lot of insight.
I have often gone into victim mode and after some time in recovery have had to learn to stop and ask myself, is that really the truth? Am I really sad or just crying to manipulate?
Lots of things like that, the person who grows up in an addicted home is out of touch with reality and disconnected from their true feelings. Everything becomes sort of reactionary and it takes a lot of time and therapy or 12 step work to learn how to stop doing that.
It's often not somebody being purposely cunning and manipulative, it's them behaving as they have always behaved without much insight or awareness of it. But we can fly off the handle at a trigger and not even realize why, or get overcome with some sort of need we don't understand and start blindly trying to get it. It's not all just thought out and planned piece by piece like a psychopath would, it's actually a lot of haphazard repeated patterns of a person that barely knows themself.
Unless she is a sociopath, I dont know. But if she's not then it's more like what I wrote above. She needs some serious reprogramming through psychology or a 12 step group like adult children of Alcoholics (and dysfunctional families).
I hope that's not an offensive post I just wanted to share a little. In my 20s I was just as bad as amber and now I'm a much better person but it took ten years of very hard work and facing the truth and pain and working hard to rewire everything about me and how I interact with the world. I'm not better than ALR because I did that, that would be power leveling. I'm just luckier than ALR that I got the right help. My best friend with the same problems jumped out of a window and died, she was just like me, the same person, but one got the help and the other didn't. It was like the luck of the draw.
Yes but we're not talking about that. IF she's literally lying about everything, I'd get it. But I don't think that. I definitely don't believe that everything she says is accurate but I can believe some of it happened. But again, she could, oh, I don't know, not be a cunt to her girlfriend at least?
Unless she is a sociopath, I dont know.
I hope that's not an offensive post I just wanted to share a little. In my 20s I was just as bad as amber
I love him so much and I wish he’d do a video on Amber. I haven’t ever seen anyone request it, though. Maybe one of us will eventually lolI don't know if any of you have watched Dr Todd Grande on YouTube, but he has several videos on the intersection of Borderline and Narcissistic Personality Disorder (or Vulnerable Narcissist) that seem to check a lot of boxes regarding her behavior.