Reading the summary still causes severe brain damage because Amber.I never want to "just check the farms real quick before going to bed" again.
Here goes my recap because my sleep is so unimportant.
00:30 Only thirty seconds in, and watching her armflaps giggle wildly as she pulls up her sleeves had me gasping real hard. My brain has so much oxygen now, I'm ready for what's next.
00:35 oooh she's gonna ask her viewers to give her topics, or questions, or stuff that she could talk about. Guess who's been listening to everyone screaming about how she has no content besides food and lahs and repeatedly throwing this exact idea her way ?
1:20 Apologizes for being Cuntlynn last video. Turns out she was hurt cause people were rude about the video showing her progress. It's been said and will be said again ; funny how no one believes you after you lied for six years. Even if your video proved anything, do you really think people would give you the satisfaction for such little effort ?
2:23 Doesn't taste mushrooms. No shit sherlock, you don't taste shit cause your single tastebud has been junked into oblivion and that's why healthy food doesn't bring that sparkle in your eyes like garbage food does.
2:36 First lipsmack ! Subtle but noticeable nonetheless. I'm tempted to count them throughout the video but I think it's considered self-harm at this point.
3:44 First carrot ASMR (and approx 10 lipsmacks)
4:20 The Laughing Cow cheese in Walmart can be found in the deli isle with, like, the frozen pizzas ? You're gonna tell me you see the pizzas and don't buy them ?
Sanity update : i've given up already on counting the lipsmacks.
4:54 i don't give a shit about freshly, all I can focus on are her beetus fingers. Christ.
5:06 Still buying water bottles ! I sure hope EnvironmentaLynn AT LEAST has separated bins so her trash can be recycled.
6:30 Adressing the "Ass me anything", saying the person who photoshopped it accidentally messed up. No, gorl. They went out of their way to replace the K with an S. Accidentally messing up would be lying about anything and then contradicting yourself, and cover it up with yet another easily debunkable lie (then blame the haydurs, but i'm getting ahead of myself)
7:20 WHY DOES SHE NEED TO VACUUM CARROTS LIKE THAT OH MY GOD
7:35 Oh, you're right. The bowling ball thing ? If we know you, that's nothing you'd ever say. You're really not the type to make false accusations of traumatic sexual abuse.
8:25 Now I'm distracted by her neglected nails. I guess gorl's been extra hungry for crunchy stuff.
10:33 YES, D&D ARE MAKING THEIR COMEBACK IN THE AMBERVERSE i mean i hope. Gorl has been letting herself look like a corpse without her one and only love around.
10:55 D&D used to live like an hour and a half away, and now it's just an hour away. Which, when you're Amber's size sitting in a car, is a huge difference. Kinda fantasizing about Becky getting in a car accident cause Amber just couldn't wait to see Dustin. This is what all these lip smacking and tongue sticking are turning me into.
11:43 Her lymphedema becomes hard as a rock, still not her rock bottom though.
Well, well, well, isn't she properly following a list, staying focused, not randomly rambling ? Almost like her ADD act was... an act. And she's obviously not on drugs for it, she would've bragged about it to validate her mentuls collection.
12:21 if you close your eyes and listen carefully, you can hear her skeleton whenever she moves
12:33 Not sure I misunderstood, but she orders Freshly nine times a week ? But there's seven days in a week, and two meals in a day (breakfast excluded and lol @ me who does this math thinking she has a normal eating schedule), so that's a least 14 meals, so what is she eating during these five last meals when it's not freshly ?
13:14 JFC that double tongue-sticking. I can't. I'm r e p u l s e d
It's funny that when she wakes up at night she checks if becks and twinks are still breathing because with her sleep apnea she's the one who needs to be checked.
16:37 Is it me or has she been sniffing/scratching/wiping her nose quite often ? Still sick, honey-boo-boo ? How's that immune system ?
17:10 She wants to dance and now, she has the stamina for it. I'm thrilled. Really. I've been suggesting dancing. I'm gonna loooooove it. Her ankles, knees, hips, spine though ? not so much. Can't wait.
18:00 Smartlynn realizing after 29 years that eating slowly is better. She has decided to finally behave accordingly to her comments instead of being all smug and doing her own thing. I guess now she'll say mukbangs do help her because she talks to us so she eats sloooooow
20:06 I love how she still puts her dainty beetus hands on her face thinking we don't pay attention to the knuckles.
20:20 This bish really be acting like losing ~50 lbs and still weighing over 500 lbs has made her back problems disappear entirely. She can now try 5 dresses in a row and film it and her back just doesn't hurt anymore guise ! What an amazing progress ! Almost surreal !
22:30 "Comparing yourself to me is silly. That's like comparing Michael Jordans to a one year old toddler" I AM DEAD, watching this entire video was worth this simple moment. Never has she ever spoken truer words. My brain can't even find an english word to describe the satisfaction.
23:17 She's "not the type of person to celebrate other people's victories", she's the type of person who's gonna cry when other people don't celebrate her victories.
24:40 Wait... Becky's still sleeping right now ? Is this video recorded in the morning ? Is THAT her breakfast ? Or is Becky too drugged to wake up before the afternoon ?
Aaaaand my self-inflicted suffering has come to its end.
Hope I saved y'all some brain damage.
whatever that dirt strip on the right side of her left hand is....that’s not just dark knuckles. That looks like pure dirt. Girl needs to start washing those meaty paws or she’s going to get the coronavirus
Her dancing consists in flaring her arms like a lunatic and giggling her fat at the beat of music. The last time she was at a dancing weight was probably when she was 6. She is as much of as a dancer as she is world-class poet.Um, she used to be a dancer? Right....