mukbang | stirfry 05/03/20 -

Keyboard Warrior

kiwifarms.net
I laughed at the part at 9 minutes where after Amber has been eating and crying at the same time you realize that Becky is sitting there within speaking distance, and gives no fucks, when Amber asks her some shit about the new season of Drag Race.
This moment stood out to me too. Not that I needed further proof that her crying is 95% performative bullshit, but that really sealed it for me. Becky knows this is just part of the game, but I'm willing to bet Amber fake cries a lot off camera too and is largely successful at getting what she wants because of it. It's the most effective tool in her manipulation toolbox, designed to elicit sympathy and to give the impression that she's a sensitive soul.

Her last livestream proved it works too. It works even on people that can't stand her most of the time and are vocal about it.
 

Turd Fergusson

kiwifarms.net
She didn't film her walk with Rickie and Eric and the dogs. Instead she punishes us with these sit-downs. Why would she choose to do that?
I do not think that many people believe her. Last year, she claimed that she was really mobile but instead stayed in bed for 3 months. She probably went outside, sat on the patio while Eric and Rickie walked the dogs. At her weight, she could not walk for half an hour without being in absolute agony. At her latest trips to Walmart, she still needed the use the mobility scooters and she was at about the same weight as now.
 

Diet Coke 4 Life

When I peek, it is in the line of duty.
kiwifarms.net
27:11 of eating? Fuck me.

You know what, fuck time-stamping this. I have better things to do with my life today, especially seeing as how the weather has finally turned for the better and there’s a big sand-pit I want to sink my gravel bike into. Running commentary time, guys!

---Here we go.---

Her ‘Hey guise!’ Is super cheerful as she sits in front of a disgusting plate of slop.

Says she’s made it before. Except I don’t remember a plate of shit like HOLY FUCK! Her jaw practically unhinged to get the largest forkful of shit into her face that she could.

Looks to be about a full can of baby corns, about 5 sad chunks of broccoli. Has at least a full cup of white rice. Perhaps a full breast of chicken cut into massive chunks. HUGE chunks of onion. Wait, sorry, per AL’s pronunciation, ‘choanks’. Has a few sliced water chestnuts, a small bit of carrots, and a hidden chunk of cauliflower.

Tops it off with General Tso’s sauce, low sodium soy sauce and pepper. Why General Tso’s?

Looks dry as fuck. Says she loves it, but there’s next to no foodgasms and the most bland expression ever. So no, she doesn’t love it. There’s no head nods and mmmm mmmm mmmm like there is when she’s consuming fast food.

She feels shaky. Hand is flat as fuck and doesn’t vibrate at all on camera when she holds it out to observe her shakiness.

Blathers on about her eye twitches. Le sob, fatty.

Calling another doctor because her doctor probably told her to STFU and go get some Wommart Vitamin D pills.

Says she’s having internal ‘feels like she’s vibrating on the inside’ and it isn’t visible. Describes them as tremors. Her eyebrow is twitching. Says she feels like she’s losing hearing in her ear. Neck aches, shoulder aches, temple aches, back of her head. She says pain is going down the left side of her head into her shoulder. Medikiwis, have fun!

Says she thinks it’s the internal vibrations (pauses so she can fake almost-cry).

And now she’s getting red in the face, but there’re no tears. Shoves food into her mouth to overcome her emotions.

Says her violent eye twitches have been going for 2 months.

She’s behind in her videos? No, say it isn’t so!! </sarcasm>

And it’s not medical shit that’s keeping her from filming - it’s she doesn’t /want/ to because she’s not in the mood.

Sniff sniff sniff, no tears even though she’s dabbing at her eyeball. Says while she’s moving she doesn’t feel these internal vibrations, but when she sits down and when she goes to bed (aka: sits down) she feels them and it’s sCaRiNg HeR.

Has to pay out of pocket! Oh noes! Bitch, you’ve been yelled at for YEARS to get health insurance.

Last doctor said “Yeah, I’m just going to refer you to an eye doctor” and she had to pay a bunch of money just for that referral.

Covers her mouth so she can laugh and pretend to cry.

“Let’s just enjoy the food, and I can ignore how I feel.” Story of your life.

Drag Race new season talk. She’s watched the first 3 episodes. She’s forgetting that Fridays exist. Doesn’t know what day it is. But on IG she knows exactly how many days she’s posting her ‘Ask Me’ things. Laaaaaahs.

Just admit you don’t like this season.

AH. 9 minutes in, that’s where we get that Becky’s right off the camera and not giving a fuck as her ‘girlfriend’ is apparently about to break down and ‘cry’ (with no tears).

Says she likes Widow. Calls her ‘her’ because that’s what the drag queens call each other. No shit, Sherlock.

Still blathering about drag queens. Also likes Nicky. This is meaningless to me.

Says it’s ‘really crazy’ that she didn’t like Nicky at first, but then grew to like her. Writerlynn still needs a fucking thesaurus. NOT EVERYTHING IS CRAZY.

She is shoving HUGE helpings of food into her mouth.

At least she has the decency to bite a whole baby-corn in half instead of just shoving the whole damned thing into her mouth.

Little Fires Everywhere is a show she recommends. Says it’s the best show she’s ever seen, because the character development was really good. Sure sure. Whatever. ‘I had the goosebumps’ from the finale. Praises the acting. Probably because they could summon tears when they needed to cry, and she’s envious.

Also has watched Big Little Lies.

Also watched Man on the Moon. Says that if you have a heart you’ll cry. I’m a heartless asshole because I didn’t cry at all. I just appreciated the acting.

Forrest Gump has also been watched, and is apparently a favorite movie of hers.

Gorl’s entire life is revolving around movies and shows now because she can’t do anything else.

Tells the tale of how a foster home she was out only had Forrest Gump in their movie selection and they didn’t have cable. Guess public access television wasn’t good enough for 10 year old Amberlynn. Says that was the foster home before she went into the group home. Timeline Lords, I await this being debunked.

Says she’s been on her anxiety medication for ‘some time now’ and it’s not helping. Says that because of her health issue she’s going through she can’t decipher between real fear and anxiety. She can’t figure it out on her own.

Says she knows her symptoms aren’t from her anxiety medicine. Belches in the middle of the explanation, says she’s sorry but she doesn’t intend to edit this video. Lazy fucker.

Lost track of what she’s saying. Gets back on track.

A ‘lot of people’ asked what medicine it was. Zoloft.

Also on Lamictal. Says Lamictal is amazing because it apparently changed her life. Her doctor said she felt Zoloft would be better, but AL is like “I dunno” and is taking them both.

Says she’s not sure if Zoloft is right for her, but she’s going to continue taking it longer and let it do its thing and see what happens. While she shoves more food in her face.

Says her food’s so good, but she makes the ‘this is gross’ toddler face when she says that.

Says baby corn reminds her of octopus tentacles. The sight puts her off, but it tastes good. Bitch has never had octopus. She wouldn’t know what to do with it.

Blathers about how baby corn doesn’t taste at all like regular corn. Doesn’t know if it’s a completely different thing or not.

The more she stirs it around, the more it looks like that was a cup of rice DRY before being cooked, because holy SHIT that’s a lot of rice.

And given how much she’s shoved into her face, this was an enormous platter of yellow-brown shit.

Whines that things suck because she’s anxiety written/ridden (yes, she says both) and that’s all she could think about. And finally when she came to terms with Corona-chan and getting over that anxiety, she gets an eye twitch. Yes, your life blows so hard, AL.

Whimpers that she just wants to be freaking happy. It seems impossible. If I was sitting in front of that plate of gross looking stir fry, I’d feel that I’d never be happy again as well.

Doesn’t bother going for the finish because it’s gross.

Says she likes cooking enough to where she doesn’t have to cook for the next 2-3 meals. Leftovers are gross after the 2nd day, apparently.

Leftovers aren’t her jam. But microwaved McDonalds? FUCK YES.

Shows off her stupid dress. Says she didn’t ‘haul’ it. Doesn’t think it was part of a haul. Got it for Valentine’s day but wore something else (she doesn’t recall what she wore). Says it fits her better than it did in February.

Bitch, we know it’s a dress that fits you as a shirt instead of a dress.

Says her stir fry’s good, but it needs sriracha.

Says her stomach is growling and it’s been making all sorts of weird noises whenever she eats.

Boo-hoos about how now her body’s falling apart, now that she’s losing weight. LOLOLOL

Says she’s watched all of the videos her youtubers she likes to watch have posted. Says she finds it hard to find youtubers that hold her interest. Finds it hard to find good quality watching content. Because not everyone reads shitty poetry or shoves gross food in their mouths. Or are morbidly obese idiots ‘trying’ to lose weight.

Keeps eating despite her saying she didn’t want to eat more of her food.

Says that her stir fry doesn’t need the chicken in the slightest. Whatever. Nobody cares.

Says she’s going to change the white rice to brown rice even though she doesn’t like brown rice. But wants it to be healthier. How about less rice, idiot?

Apologizes for background noises. Fuck anyone else trying to use the kitchen.

Rambles on about how she rambles because it takes her mind off the ‘scary things’ in her life.

Says keep her in her thoughts, and if you pray, pray.

Now on a tangent about how she’s agnostic, and it means she needs proof of something before she believes it, but it doesn’t mean she doesn't believe. Nooooo, it’s more that the existence of God, of the divine or the supernatural is unknown or unknowable. Not that you need proof, you fat blob. Another definition is that humanity is incapable of providing sufficient rational grounds to justify either the belief that God exists or the belief that God doesn’t exist.

Sorry ‘bout that. Minor nerve struck. Very minor. Moving on.

She claims she recently prayed, and that she prays to ‘I don’t know what, maybe the universe or whoever’s listening. I only do it when I’m super desperate.’

Says that she cries when she prays and it’s ‘really crazy (THESAURUS-SMASH)’. Burps again.

Confusing karmic beliefs with agnostic mindset. But I expect nothing less from her.

Going to go figure out her leftovers, clean for a little bit, might film another video.

TL;DR/W: Ramble ramble ramble munch munch munch ramble.

Edit: Fuck formatting.
 
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Orion Balls

Sorry Wendy, I love my hat girl.
kiwifarms.net
How is it that everything she cooks always ends up that same, uniform, beige-yellow-brown color? It just makes it all look so unappealing. Like she's trying to make food as much of a chore as possible, except she gorges on junk between 'official' meals.
For someone who eats so much, I originally expected a bit more creativity and skill in her culinary arts. She lacks creativity and skill in every aspect of her life, though, so I'm not sure why I assumed her to cook well.
 

CindyChafe

Sent from my iPhone
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Why doesn't she just order masks?
Because that would be a sensible thing to do and solve her problem and she would have nothing to bitch about.

Although youcan’t really find N95s in stock anywhere online that aren’t backordered (in the US at least) right now anyway. The masks you can find are just shitty cloth ones and for that she can just wrap a scarf around her maw.

I dont’t think she could even get an N95 around her face. At least the 3M painter mask type. It would be super tight and I could see the band just snap and hopefully take her eye out which would solve her twitching problem

Watching Amber crying about her eye twitch while eating and lamenting her lack of health insurance due to her own laziness was a total lol. The 600lb woman doctor shopping for a fifth opinion about her eye twitching but not wanting to hear about losing weight.

Amber should just keep going live and e-panhandle like a good sideshow freak.
 

Ozul

Please be my friend
kiwifarms.net
The "internal vibrations" are definitely a symptom of medication withdrawal or improper use.

Anti depressants/anxiety medication effects the neurons throughout the body which carry electrical impulses. They basically stop certain natural chemicals in the body from "dropping off" in the gaps between neurons, thus allowing those chemicals to reach the brain.
Your body goes into mild shock when the flow of your nervous system is changed suddenly or is inconsistent. These side effects include twitching, mood swings, irrational thoughts, brain/body vibrations and can last for weeks.
 

FatalTater

Fattest Among Thousands, Altogether Lethargic
kiwifarms.net
I wonder how Amber's going to age, assuming her lifestyle doesn't catch up to her all at once and do her in. Some age gracefully, but some people get to the over-the-hill point and realize that the other side of that hill has been greased. What will the future hold for #Amberlynn?
 
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Reactions: Lesbian Sleepover

sperginity

tardian angel
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
After Mothman's post: what the hell are 'internal vibrations'?
when the muscles that control your eye (or near your eye) spasm it does feel like something is vibrating inside the eye. I can see why it is a alarming but its really not much different from the twitching she knows about, its just in rapid succession.
 

Bland Crumbs

You Must Pick One or the Other
kiwifarms.net
God, that looks disgusting. Stir frys are supposed to look colourful and fresh. Hers looks like a pile of wet gym socks
Your comment brought me to a realization.

This thing, this behemoth, has reached the bulk of a Yugo by eating a mind boggling stream of meals that are just sad.

The highlight of her culinary adventures is Orange Chicken from the fucking Cheesecake Factory. Diarrhea Chili, platters of grey sausage, and endless chickens cooked until they are drier than the Mohave...just sad food.
 

Turd Fergusson

kiwifarms.net
I wonder how Amber's going to age, assuming her lifestyle doesn't catch up to her all at once and do her in. Some age gracefully, but some people get to the over-the-hill point and realize that the other side of that hill has been greased. What will the future hold for #Amberlynn?
I think it will not be treat her well. For one thing, her skin has been stretched so much that there is no way that it can be returned back to a normal self. Her arms are going to be ghastly. Her large abdominal apron will need surgery. If she loses the weight, she might look like Pauline from MSHPL, since she neglected to have her lymphedema treated. At the end, she will need to pay by herself for all that surgery, or Becky will pay for it.
 
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