My New Diet Plan | Grocery Haul 7/15/19 - Day 1 Amberlynn..

This is a comparison of Mumbles from the Cucumber Boats and a Twitter Q&A posted June 6th, he's wearing what appears to be the same outfit (same awful loose collar) and I think Mumbles has a better chance of uploading in a 2-4 day span of time. Also there was no sticky note above the trash can in his vlogs in May but it appears in June.

Basically, no matter what our gorl is a big old bean bag of confusion.
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Gorl68

Driest of gorls
kiwifarms.net
Oh, she's still counting. She's been a whale her whole life. No matter what plan she is on, she is counting those calories whether she admits it or not. The only reason she's not scurrrred is because she thinks she can have fast food which will ensure she gets "enough" calories.
But Optivia had a detailed eating out guidebook with countless options from hundreds of her favorite shitty chain and fast food restaurants on it...

It's only a matter of time before AL freaks out about her 8lb a month plan having too little food. Oh who are we kidding... She already has. We just haven't seen the video yet.
 

a llama weighs 450lbs

amber's hump #1 fan
kiwifarms.net
Love how she picked out these candybar-ish protein bars and humbly tells us that they have more carbs than she would like.. but what can she do..she's following the plan 💁‍♀️
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quest bars and other quest low carb processed-to-hell junk food crap (cookies, chips, they even have frozen pizzas now) are everywhere now that keto is trendy, i'm shocked their kroger doesn't carry them. that shit is made for people actually doing low carb and the bars have 20g of protein like the doc ordered. but when you're "tryeen" to stay under 100g carbs i guess you don't need to be as picky
 

GargoyleGorl

Token SJW
kiwifarms.net
If you parse out all the info from her bullshitting, it actually sounds like a decently practical plan, for someone who is simply lazy and overeats. But the problem is that, as people have pointed out, she's a food addict, and not just a lazy overeater.
I don't know how "weight loss doctors" actually work, but I think, at least with the extreme cases, behavior therapy/counseling needs to be involved.
And wasn't that the point of the weight loss CENTER? That ALL of those professionals -- therapists, surgeons, nutritionists -- were at her disposal?

Meanwhile, the psychiatrist she shares with Becky seems to be totally unrelated to anything else.

I will NEVER understand why these death fats insist on eating protein bars!
Because they're just like candy bars, but "healthy". So you can eat them as much as you want. Right?
 

sperginity

crack whore
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
This incredibly depressing to watch since I know she already quit trying the doctor's plan. It is lidurally either eat less carbs or die, and she is still trying to find a way around it. If she gave a fuck about getting surgery she would purchase insurance. Nothing is stopping her from buying a plan except knowing she will no longer have an excuse. Becky needs to do her best social worker impression and do all the paper work for AL to sign (I really think this is a big reason she is the way that she is, after getting taken away from her parents social workers applied for her to get on various programs, made sure everything was done for her, and made her weirdly unconcerned about doing anything for herself). Or becky is probably gonna die too. She put a gun to her head and pulled the trigger because she thought she caused her nephew to die despite not being anywhere near the kid when it happened. In this case there are hours of video of her making sure AL has food. And a handful of sped asspatters who will tard rage at becky on social media if AL dies.
 

Prince Lotor

A picture of Dad and I before he ordered my death
kiwifarms.net
lol those 'Protein' bars are literally just big ass candy bars with a bunch of shitty soy protein dumped in.

The Cliff bar has: 290 calories; 9g fat (13%DV) with 6g as Saturated Fat (30%DV); 30g of Carbs withh 22g as Sugar; and 200mg of Sodium (10%DV)

A Snickers bar has: 215 calories; 11g fat (16%DV) with 6g as Saturated Fat (30%DV); 28g of Carbs with 20g as Sugar; and 83 mg of Sodium (4%DV)

She would actually be better off just eating a Snickers for breakfast at ¾ the calories, half the Sodium, and less sugar.
There are much better protein bars on the market that aren't loaded with Sugar and Saturated Fat that use Whey Protein if you just shop around a little.
 

beautiful person

kiwifarms.net
And wasn't that the point of the weight loss CENTER? That ALL of those professionals -- therapists, surgeons, nutritionists -- were at her disposal?
I don't keep up with Amber that closely, but she went to one of those places? Because that's really the only thing I think would have a chance on her, and if she already couldn't get it together in that kind of environment, then she's pretty much fucked, tbh.
 

Amber Khan

kiwifarms.net
"Who are these people? Do they decide what gas you put in your car? What shampoo you use in your hair?"

NO. They can't make your decisions for you, Amber. And I'm very glad they can't. A whole community - pages of threads, spanning years, hundreds of people - has assembled to watch your fup:feels:tastic waste of life decline, crash, explode, and burn in an entertaining fashion. A human ant spiral.
 

Captain Ahab

kiwifarms.net
The Builder's bars have about 100 more calories than other bars. They're for bodybuilders. And she knows this. People have been telling not to eat those since the Krystle days. But it's doctor's orders. Leave it to Amber to choose one of the most caloric bars on the market.
I don’t get fatties’ obsession with protein bars. I’m surprised a doctor recommended them to her. It’s kinda hard to believe. Protein bars aren’t very filling and they are packed with calories. Why not make her drink a protein shake instead? It’s much lower in calories than bars and usually provides a bit more protein. She could make it more caloric by using tard cum and blending it with some frozen berries and maybe some oatmeal. That’s a solid breakfast there. At least it’d be real food with lots of macro and micronutrients.

That said, why would she even be worried about protein intake in the first place? She eats an entire plate of sausage...
 

497

kiwifarms.net
I think part of it is prepackaged foods are a fixed, known amount of calories. If Amber were to cook, it's guaranteed she'd end up adding extra shit or fudging her portion sizes and end up having many more calories than would be expected for whatever she was making.
Yeah, she probably told the doctor she hates cooking and when Amber wasn't looking Becky made a gag face to let him know how bad it is. Do you think he really said those sausages were ok? No real pieces of meat, fresh vegetables or salads? Maybe not vegetables or salads since it's stuff she doesn't like. I'm sure Becky knows how to grill a chicken or steak on the grill or even put it in the air fryer.

People are saying she quit already anyway. She probably missed the heaping piles of rice. carbs are good booboo.
 

Amber Khan

kiwifarms.net
SHOOKETHLYNN STRIKES AGAIN

This useless bedbound bitch shops for doctors who will enable eating her habits and offer a justification for her to temporarily soothe her death anxiety.
Sitting here imagining Amber clutching her rolls as one of her fragile vital organs fails. she screams "I AM SHOOKETH! HEART FAILURE SITUATION BOOBOO!"
 

JoyQ

smug pug
kiwifarms.net
Unpopular opinion maybe but this diet could actually work for someone of her size. It would completely depend on her sticking to it, however, which we know is where she fails.

She could literally shave 50 calories off each day from her BMR which would at least stop her from gaining and she would have success and weight loss if she actually just stuck to it but she can’t follow through which is 90% of weight loss. Consistency.
 

Amber Khan

kiwifarms.net
But Optivia had a detailed eating out guidebook with countless options from hundreds of her favorite shitty chain and fast food restaurants on it...

It's only a matter of time before AL freaks out about her 8lb a month plan having too little food. Oh who are we kidding... She already has. We just haven't seen the video yet.
Here's my headcanon:
The delay is caused by hitting the 600 mark (duh). We will soon break the barrier through a solemn and circumspect HonestLynn vlog live from Pillow Mountain. We may see something like 'hi, i'm amberlynn' or the infamous Rain and Petals Eavesdrop soliloquy to deflect from the fact of her stalling for months on the 600+ lb. weigh-in.

She just couldn't handle the 8 lb. a month loss. under 3,000 calories a day. Youguys. It was dangerously extreme. Unhealthy. Most of all, disordered. She reasonably panicked under the stress of vlogging daily and counting, so the binge monster visited to make her eat and hit Becky.

She's sure a more achievable, manageable diet regimen will help next time. Until then, we get to enjoy a steady stream of interesting grocery hauls and other trendy, super cool videos before another weight gain milestone is reached 🎉 and videos get pushed back another month. I bet she is enjoying a well-earned treat in bed as we speak.
 
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