Diseased Neo-Pagans / Witches on the Internet / Witchblr - SMT IRL, but with fatties

Flexo

Don't blame me. I voted for HK-47.
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
That reminds me, I don't really know why anyone would choose to worship the Olympians. There's three pantheons I wouldn't fuck with if I had the choice; Babylonian, Mesoamerican, and Greco-Roman. Even a basic perusal of Greek myth gives you a very clear idea that the gods are petty, vindictive, and cruel. Zeus straight up rapes women all the time and his wife chooses to punish his victims. Athena turns some bitch into a spider for being better than her at weaving, and even wise and virtuous Apollo just lays some plague on people because fuck you I don't need a reason.

Inviting an Olympian in to be your personal savior is a bit like making friends with Hannibal Lecter.

Besides, they're doing it wrong. Greeks and Romans didn't take Olympians as their personal savior. For daily prayers they just propitiated the little gods of hearth and home, maybe an ancestor spirit or two. If you know anything of Shinto, it was very much like that.

But I guess saying "I worshipped at the lararium today and I fell that the lars were with me all day long!" just doesn't sound as kewl as Hades rocking out to showtunes with you.
Reading up on any old pantheon gives one a lot of understanding why Christians and Jews adopted the idea that the pagan gods were demonic spirits. (Egyptian myth is even more fucked up than greek.)

Sometimes I wonder if those demons are around if they're laughing their tails off or cringing hard enough to cause earthquakes.

I do now want an "modern gods" story (not done by freakin' Neil gaiman) where they go around and proceed to be VERY un-PC to their worshippers. i.e. "Sorry bitch, but worshipping me in that outfit is consent."
 

fuzzyrodent85

kiwifarms.net
Screenshot_20210225-125951.png
It could be the windows background.

Screenshot_20210225-202830.pngScreenshot_20210225-202840.png
I might as well be a star in two girls one cup, because I'm saying right now that no one can participate in witchcraft because it isn't real.

Screenshot_20210226-082345.png
So you're saying that Physis is the easiest hoe ever, it costs about $2.99 to fuck her. Most pathetic embodiment of the divine order of the cosmos I've ever heard of.

Screenshot_20210227-145551.pngHades kidnapped Persephone and basically drugged her so that she would stay with him.

Screenshot_20210227-162338.png
What do you mean "tried" to dox you? If they're your friends and know your name and face it wouldn't be that hard.

Screenshot_20210227-180404.png
CULTURAL APPROPRIATION!!!! REEEEEEE REEEEEEE REEEEEEE REEEEEEE REEEEEEE REEEEEEE REEEEEEE REEEEEEE!!!!!!

Screenshot_20210227-180441.png
I don't know about the rest of you guys, but that egg is telling me it needs hot sauce and a pinch of basil.

Screenshot_20210227-210508.pngScreenshot_20210227-210515.png
I wish I had Angie's fingernail clippings so I can make a spell for her to love me again.

Screenshot_20210228-120617.pngScreenshot_20210228-120623.pngScreenshot_20210228-120630.png
I think this gives off bunny boiler vibes.

Screenshot_20210228-132833.png
Pour some period blood in the cat's mouth. Then, skin the feline and make it into a rug for your altar to Aphrodite.

Screenshot_20210228-174441.pngScreenshot_20210228-174447.png
We heard you the first time.

 

NoReturn

CEO Wash & Smash llc.
kiwifarms.net
Empire of Ethiopia
Oh hey, another excuse to post something from Cartoon History of the Universe.
ethiopiacoffee-e1539641720214.png

I wish I had Angie's fingernail clippings so I can make a spell for her to love me again.
Let's see how she's doing:
1a.PNG

1.PNG

2.PNG
Then, skin the feline and make it into a rug for your altar to Aphrodite.
I hope that cat haunts the absolute shit out of her. Full on Cats of Ulthar shit.
[Tattoo-lady]
That chest piece is pretty cool, though.
[Tattoo-lady pt. 2]
She's a bitch, though. Also, the inverted cross is a cross of St. Peter.
 

PuffyGroundCloud

Steak connoisseur (on diet)
kiwifarms.net
View attachment 1963690
Ah yes, the curse absorbing ring, not at all a piece of crap sold for way too much to a gullible person.

Also hi, newfag lurk moar, hope I did this right.
Lol finger too fat for a ring.
On serious note, someone should tell Apple if their product is shitty, it means that it absorbs tons of bad juju from the user
 

fuzzyrodent85

kiwifarms.net
Screenshot_20210303-083410.pngScreenshot_20210303-083417.png
Why would you even worship Lilith anyway? She eats babies.

Screenshot_20210301-174556.png
It means you're a retard.

I took a "what kind of witch are you" quiz:
Screenshot_20210303-111806.png
Screenshot_20210303-111813.png
Any qt womxn want to lick my girly penis?

Here is the link if anyone wants to discover what breed of menstrual blood enjoyer you are:

https://styx-naiad.tumblr.com/post/644650730377166848/i-made-a-quiz-find-out-what-type-of-witch-you


 
Last edited:

Marshal Mannerheim

Koti, uskonto, ja isänmaa.
kiwifarms.net
> Jewitches

”You shall not let a sorceress live” - Exodus 22:17
”A man or a woman who acts as a medium or fortune-teller shall be put to death by stoning; they have no one but themselves to blame for their death.” - Leviticus 20:27
”I will abolish the means of divination from your use, and there shall no longer be soothsayers among you.” - Micah 5:11
”Let there not be found among you anyone who immolates his son or daughter in the fire, nor a fortune-teller, soothsayer, charmer, diviner, or caster of spells, nor one who consults ghosts and spirits or seeks oracles from the dead. Anyone who does such things is an abomination to the LORD, and because of such abominations the LORD, your God, is driving these nations out of your way. You, however, must be altogether sincere toward the LORD, your God. Though these nations whom you are to dispossess listen to their soothsayers and fortune-tellers, the LORD, your God, will not permit you to do so.” - Deuteronomy 18:10-14

And as for worshipping Lilith, a Semitic pagan goddess:
”I, the LORD, am your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt, that place of slavery. You shall not have other gods besides me. You shall not carve idols for yourselves in the shape of anything in the sky above or on the earth below or in the waters beneath the earth; you shall not bow down before them or worship them.” - Exodus 20:2-5
 

NoReturn

CEO Wash & Smash llc.
kiwifarms.net
Jesus...how many pets has this psychopath killed?
Mayortomatillo and Angie are two different people, but could you imagine if they fusioned into a single witch?

Speaking of MayorTomatillo:
1.PNG

Still no mentions of the kid, though.
And to keep things on-topic:
mye0uusegtk61.jpg

#notlikeothergirls
2.PNG

How is this witchcraft?

And this one is special-chosen for Fuzzy
3.PNG
 
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Dysnomia

Is Reimu gonna have to smack a bitch?
kiwifarms.net
View attachment 1958916
It could be the windows background.

View attachment 1958918View attachment 1958920
I might as well be a star in two girls one cup, because I'm saying right now that no one can participate in witchcraft because it isn't real.

View attachment 1958922
So you're saying that Physis is the easiest hoe ever, it costs about $2.99 to fuck her. Most pathetic embodiment of the divine order of the cosmos I've ever heard of.

View attachment 1958934Hades kidnapped Persephone and basically drugged her so that she would stay with him.

View attachment 1958936
What do you mean "tried" to dox you? If they're your friends and know your name and face it wouldn't be that hard.

View attachment 1958942
CULTURAL APPROPRIATION!!!! REEEEEEE REEEEEEE REEEEEEE REEEEEEE REEEEEEE REEEEEEE REEEEEEE REEEEEEE!!!!!!

View attachment 1958944
I don't know about the rest of you guys, but that egg is telling me it needs hot sauce and a pinch of basil.

View attachment 1958946View attachment 1958948
I wish I had Angie's fingernail clippings so I can make a spell for her to love me again.

View attachment 1958954View attachment 1958955View attachment 1958957
I think this gives off bunny boiler vibes.

View attachment 1958960
Pour some period blood in the cat's mouth. Then, skin the feline and make it into a rug for your altar to Aphrodite.

View attachment 1958974View attachment 1958975
We heard you the first time.
View attachment 1958979
View attachment 1958981View attachment 1958983View attachment 1958984


Summerland? The King's X song? :biggrin:

That hag in the last video. Oh God. She looks like 45 year old trailer trash but she's probably a lot younger. Ick. Most f these women are just so ugly or unkempt. No wonder they gravitate towards stuff like this. The edgy ones want to be edgy and the ugly ones want to feel like they have something special going on.

The Hot Topic queen is pretty hilarious too. But at least she's trying to fix herself up. For a Manson concert in 1996.

Speaking of MayorTomatillo:
View attachment 1967883
Still no mentions of the kid, though.
And to keep things on-topic:
View attachment 1967885
#notlikeothergirls
View attachment 1967886
How is this witchcraft?

And this one is special-chosen for Fuzzy

Is that a real lizard? You never put predator and prey animals together.
 

NoReturn

CEO Wash & Smash llc.
kiwifarms.net
Summerland? The King's X song? :biggrin:

That hag in the last video. Oh God. She looks like 45 year old trailer trash but she's probably a lot younger. Ick. Most f these women are just so ugly or unkempt. No wonder they gravitate towards stuff like this. The edgy ones want to be edgy and the ugly ones want to feel like they have something special going on.

The Hot Topic queen is pretty hilarious too. But at least she's trying to fix herself up. For a Manson concert in 1996.



Is that a real lizard? You never put predator and prey animals together.
Yes. It's the leopard gecko that came up earlier in this thread.
 

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