Notorious murderers or criminals who are lolcows -

Popper Whiting

Irreverent Crack Baby
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pauldenyer2.jpg
pauldenyer1.jpg


Paul (Paula) Denyer

An Australian Serial Killer, known as The Frankston Killer, who murdered 3 young women in Frankston Victoria in the early 1990s. Was a loner who was obsessed with knives and slasher films who was known and teased in highschool with the name "John Candy" given he was a big fat fuck. Got fired from a couple of workplaces for violence toward women and would spend his free time stalking numerous women around the Frankston area. Before the murders commenced he broke into neighbour's flat and butchered a cat and her entire litter of kittens. Everyone who had a passing aquaintence to him knew him due to how awkward and creepy the guy came across.

After a life sentence without the possibility of parole Denyer trooned out and has been spending tax payer money on lawyers in order to get him moved to a women's prison, sexual re-alignment surgery and a legal name change to Paula. In letters has claimed the reason he killed was because he "I committed these disgusting crimes ... not because I ever hated womankind, but because I have never really felt that I was male". For some reason changing the wikipedia article name back to Paul Denyer will earn you a ban despite Denyer being an admitted sexual predator who tortured, killed, and mutilated women, showing that being a sexually deviant fuck who's into killing people is more acceptable than deadnaming that sexually deviant fuck. Desperate for attention and known as a general nuisance in the prison population.

Wiki article: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paula_Denyer
Documentary on the killings involving videos of Denyer's interview:

Given the rampant need for attention, the awkard behaviour, the transexualism and the deviant sexual interests there is, in my opinion, a high likelyhood that Denyer would have a thread here had he not become a killer.

Edit: got my tenses wrong and can be ocd with that stuff.
 
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JuanButNotForgotten

Friendly Mexican Ghost
True & Honest Fan
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this guy is funny, until the murders, but when you think about it its really scary- he was in charge of dozens of highly trained military personnel and in control of literally enough weapons to level a city block in minutes
Aside from what he's done, he is lolcow because of the fact how he was caught.
The only thing that investigators had was the fact that his tires matched with tire prints near the house of the latest victim, any court would destroy this evidence, yet investigator was able to make him confess.

Charles Salvador better known as Charles Bronson isn't exactly a lolcow as much as he is a fun read because he's a maniac. He's been in and out of prison and involuntary psychiatric holding for over forty years because while out of prison he seems content merely with robbery, in prison he can't stop mauling people. Since his initial arrest, the times he's been actually free range between 15 and 69 days. He's a former strongman and bare-knuckle boxer who is apparently capable of bending his cell door bars with his bare hands. He's been in solitary almost as often as out for several altercations with other inmates and guards, often taking hostages, and taking part in several riots, once (that we know of) buck-naked. He's absolutely a violent psychopath, but because he's so well-known in the UK he keeps getting interviewed by the press and authors writing books and films about him and no one knows exactly how many crimes he's committed because he's known for constantly making up new stories about himself. He's also won several awards for demented and edgy paintings he's created in prison.
I've read "Solitary fitness", it's actually pretty good. I expected it to be about some absolutely batshit insane training routine, but it was calm, informative and surprisingly full of jokes. I guess, he had a good editor.

My pick is notorious white supremacist, virgin with rage and mass shooter.
 

Conan the Cylon

Defeating the purpose
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I've read "Solitary fitness", it's actually pretty good. I expected it to be about some absolutely batshit insane training routine, but it was calm, informative and surprisingly full of jokes. I guess, he had a good editor.
I don't know that he ever had an editor for any of his books. He's always been known to be good with words and extremely funny. He's a madman, but he isn't dumb. He's very well liked by anyone who has met him that he hasn't savaged.
 

JuanButNotForgotten

Friendly Mexican Ghost
True & Honest Fan
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I don't know that he ever had an editor for any of his books. He's always been known to be good with words and extremely funny. He's a madman, but he isn't dumb. He's very well liked by anyone who has met him that he hasn't savaged.
"I once read bodybuilding magazine and after couple of pages used it as a toilet paper. And people call ME a criminal!"
 

Syaoran Li

They're Coming To Get You, Barbara!
True & Honest Fan
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Aside from the obvious pick of Richard Ramirez, I'd also say Charles Manson was a bona fide lolcow and horrorcow.

If we're including career criminals and general low lifes in addition to the more high-profile serial killers and mass murderers, I'd also say that Rod Ferrell, Ruben Cavazos, and Joe Gallo would all qualify as lolcows as well.
 

Product Placement

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Bunny Tracks

Nothing equals the splendor
True & Honest Fan
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Richard Chase aka "The Vampire of Sacramento" he was this schizo serial killer that believed he was welcome to come into houses if the doors were unlocked and pissed and shit on a child's bed because nobody was home. Richard also pulled mac n cheese out of his pockets and offered it to the journalist interviewing him. Which he had because he was paranoid the guards were in league with the nazis and trying poisoning him. He unintentionally committed suicide when he took all of his medication at once for some inane reason.
It genuinely annoys me that this guy died so early. He is fucking fascinating to read about (if you can stomach all the disgusting things he did, and ate), and I really wish we would've been able to learn more about him.
Jerrod Murray. He is noteworthy for being incredibly courteous despite being a cold-blooded murderer. He confessed to police, spoke clearly and politely and of course, wore his nice suit every day but wasn't balding enough to wear a fedora. Surprisingly, he was found not guilty due to insanity.
Take notes kids, pretending to be the joker won't get you out of the slammer. Being polite will.
View attachment 2232127
Apparently, Murray always wore suits because he "liked the weight of them", and was always polite, and courteous so this wasn't just him trying to get away with murder. In fact, we still don't know why he did what he did. He seems to have just done just because he could.

Either way, he's also a fascinating case, and yet another one I wish we knew more about. We do know that he's slimmed down like crazy in the insane asylum he's locked up in, and now looks nowhere near as intimidating as he once did. He now looks like a total fucking dweeb.
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Speaking of dweebs, I'd like to throw in Mark Twitchell, the Canadian Star Wars nerd, and failed film-maker who wanted to be an irl Dexter Morgan, but failed miserably. He killed one person, barely accomplished that, and got caught immediately afterwards.

His interrogation tapes are hilarious because they just consist of the cops making fun of him the entire time. Like, at one point, they took him for drive, and just kept roasting him for the entire thing.
Also, he pissed himself at one point during the interrogation. That, and his father literally told the cops to never have children because he regretted having Mark so much.
 
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gigglemilk

mimosa bukkake
True & Honest Fan
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luka magnotta but he was posted twice already

the son of sam killer is another one, at least during the period of time he tried feeding police the ridiculous story about his neighbor's dog instructing him
 

Seminal Ointments Lain

PRESENT SNEED | FORMERLY CHUCK'S | HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
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It genuinely annoys me that this guy died so early. He is fucking fascinating to read about (if you can stomach all the disgusting he did, and ate), and I really wish we would've been able to learn more about him.

Apparently, Murray always wore suits because he "liked the weight of them", and was always polite, and courteous so this wasn't just him trying to get away with murder. In fact, we still don't know why he did what he did. He seems to have just done just because he could.

Either way, he's also a fascinating case, and yet another one I wish we knew more about. We do know that he's slimmed down like crazy in the insane asylum he's locked up in, and now looks nowhere near as intimidating as he once did. He now looks like a total fucking dweeb.
Speaking of dweebs, I'd like to throw in Mark Twitchell, the Canadian Star Wars nerd who wanted to be an irl Dexter Morgan, but failed miserably. He killed one person, barely accomplished that, and got caught immediately afterwards.

His interrogation tapes are hilarious because they just consist of the cops making fun of him the entire time. Like, at one point, they took him for drive, and just kept roasting him for the entire thing.
Also, he pissed himself at one point during the interrogation. That, and his father literally told the cops to never have children because he regretted having Mark so much.
LMAO +1
 

RazorBackBacon

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Jerrod Murray. He is noteworthy for being incredibly courteous despite being a cold-blooded murderer. He confessed to police, spoke clearly and politely and of course, wore his nice suit every day but wasn't balding enough to wear a fedora. Surprisingly, he was found not guilty due to insanity.
Take notes kids, pretending to be the joker won't get you out of the slammer. Being polite will.
View attachment 2232127
Jerrod's saving graces were the lack of apparent motive and his obvious peculiarities. Killing for no reason and then making no attempt to defend yourself usually spells "CRAZY" to law enforcement.

As for killers who are lolcows, I'd say any of the serial killers who decide to start making art while committing their crimes or in prison. My favorite is Sam Little who made these just masterful fucking portraits of his victims.
sam-little.jpg
 

Ronnie Rocket

She's filled with secrets...
True & Honest Fan
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Jerrod's saving graces were the lack of apparent motive and his obvious peculiarities. Killing for no reason and then making no attempt to defend yourself usually spells "CRAZY" to law enforcement.

As for killers who are lolcows, I'd say any of the serial killers who decide to start making art while committing their crimes or in prison. My favorite is Sam Little who made these just masterful fucking portraits of his victims. View attachment 2235354
Sam's portraits, while definitely naive, often bore a striking resemblance to the victim portrayed.

John Hinckley, Jr., the dude who tried to assassinate Reagan and instead gave us the Brady Bill, is a huge lolcow. He did it to impress Jodie Foster (he's also a failed songwriter, much like another un-famous lolcow, Russell Greer) and spectacularly blew it.

Also he's now out of prison and posting on YouTube.
 

Bunny Tracks

Nothing equals the splendor
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Grant Amato comes to mind, blew his family’s money on a camwhore and then killed them all.
He stole over 200 grand from his parents, aunt, brother, and best friend just so he could talk to some thot in Bulgaria who he seriously thought he was going to marry. He then used his dead father's hand to unlock a phone just so he could steal more money to talk to her.

What the actual fuck.
 
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Poppavalyim Andropoff

Pussy Destroyer
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Yeah Richard Speck is the winner.
Grew tits with smuggled hormones & gobbled cocks like he was a fat kid in a cake factory
Ed Gein was NOT a lolcow. He was a gud boi who loved his mam and enjoyed art.
Ed Gein fdid nothing wrong
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Paul (Paula) Denyer

An Australian Serial Killer, known as The Frankston Killer, who murdered 3 young women in Frankston Victoria in the early 1990s. Was a loner who was obsessed with knives and slasher films who was known and teased in highschool with the name "John Candy" given he was a big fat fuck. Got fired from a couple of workplaces for violence toward women and would spend his free time stalking numerous women around the Frankston area. Before the murders commenced he broke into neighbour's flat and butchered a cat and her entire litter of kittens. Everyone who had a passing aquaintence to him knew him due to how awkward and creepy the guy came across.

After a life sentence without the possibility of parole Denyer trooned out and has been spending tax payer money on lawyers in order to get him moved to a women's prison, sexual re-alignment surgery and a legal name change to Paula. In letters has claimed the reason he killed was because he "I committed these disgusting crimes ... not because I ever hated womankind, but because I have never really felt that I was male". For some reason changing the wikipedia article name back to Paul Denyer will earn you a ban despite Denyer being an admitted sexual predator who tortured, killed, and mutilated women, showing that being a sexually deviant fuck who's into killing people is more acceptable than deadnaming that sexually deviant fuck. Desperate for attention and known as a general nuisance in the prison population.

Wiki article: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paula_Denyer
Documentary on the killings involving videos of Denyer's interview:

Given the rampant need for attention, the awkard behaviour, the transexualism and the deviant sexual interests there is, in my opinion, a high likelyhood that Denyer would have a thread here had he not become a killer.

Edit: got my tenses wrong and can be ocd with that stuff.
yeah from John Candy to Joanne Candy
 
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