Containment Now that Chris-Chan's story is coming to a conclusion, who/what should be in the movie about his life?

[AfghanBlue]

every time I see Mary Lee Walsh’s name mentioned in something like this, I fucking laugh.

every single other person could be said to have come into Chris’s life by their own deliberate choice, or at the very least, stayed there longer than they had to; all except MLW;
the true innocent and his most personally reviled, bewildered opponent.

she is literally Just Some Woman.

which is why the film should actually be fully centred on her, just to make her unasked-for torture complete.

of course it would have to be a series of films about her younger life first- Chris wouldn’t come in 'til like the 7th in the franchise.

 

[AnxietyMachine]

Have John Waters write and direct. He'll nail it.


In many ways the CWC story could be rewritten as an origin story for Divine.

That would be BEAUTIFUL.

 

[Undersideofcwcspillow]

Everyone likes to talk about a CWC movie and nobody is willing to write one

 

[PS1gamenwatch]

Everyone likes to talk about a CWC movie and nobody is willing to write one

Hollywood will always rewrite it.

 

[Undersideofcwcspillow]

Hollywood will always rewrite it.

Someone has to actually write one first instead of just constant threads about "what if someone wrote one."

 

[Firetruck9000]

The chris chan story will never end. This was merely act one.

 

[ClamHammer]

The chris chan story will never end. This was merely act one.

Yeah, this is just the intermission to go to the lobby for snacks.

 

[Happy and Gay Nicholas J.]

Big Trouble with Ancient 'China

 

[Hogar Grupal]

I wonder what sagas in Christory would be able to cover the 3 act structure (I know the jail arc is one of them)? and what could/would the epilogue be after Chris leaves jail?

 

[Falken Conway]

I honestly think that the not-so recent events from this past summer did literally destroy the few "innocent & funny" traits CWC had.
If everything did end different even as a hobo or whatever it would still be usable but now any documentary like the GenoSamuel Comprehensive History videos are not informative or "funny" anymore because the ending is really really dark.

I think at this point whole CWC stuff will be slowly forgotten until becoming just a really underground thing almost nobody will remember specially in for example a dozen of years.

 

[Pointless Sperg]

I honestly think that the not-so recent events from this past summer did literally destroy the few "innocent & funny" traits CWC had.
If everything did end different even as a hobo or whatever it would still be usable but now any documentary like the GenoSamuel Comprehensive History videos are not informative or "funny" anymore because the ending is really really dark.

I think at this point whole CWC stuff will be slowly forgotten until becoming just a really underground thing almost nobody will remember specially in for example a dozen of years.

Not if we put up a huge CWC statute somewhere next to a major highway, to always remind people of Christory.

 

[Justin d Tipp]

Jonah Hill as Chris.
Betty White as Barb.
Kristen Stewart as Meghan Schrodinger.
John Goodman as Michael Snyder
Shia LaBeouf as the voice of Sonichu.
Seth MacFarlane as vocal talent for the horde of other imaginary friends.
Kristen Schall as vocal talent for female animated characters.
Bryan Cranston as his attorney.
Ryan Reynolds and Seth Rogan as the arresting officers.
Narrated By Phil LaMarr.
Directed by Wes Anderson.
With Michael Bay as director of photography/special effects.

 

[DownSouthBoi]

Get the Human Centipede 3 people. They'll do it.

 

[Undersideofcwcspillow]

I'm 4300 words into a script. I'm not going to post it because it is a very very rough draft and I only want people who aren't super familiar with CWC reading it for the time being, because they can give more objective criticism of it as a script.

Got tired of people talking about "oh what if we made a Chris movie blah blah blah" and not actually just writing one.

 

[DrNow]

Empire of Crayons and Dirt: The Story of Chris Chan

I wonder if Cole would watch it, he’d never admit to it but I bet he would.

 

[Terrorist]

Phil LaMarr as @Marvin

 

[Marvin]

Phil LaMarr as @Marvin

That's my avatar.

 

[MechanicalHugbox]

Matt Damon as Liquid Chris
Jesse Plemons as Solid Chris

 

[忠勇真]

Assuming they are into the Chris Chan Saga, Denis Villeneuve should work with David Lynch and Alejandro Jodorowsky to adapt the entire saga as a nine-part epic with each part being around 8 hours long, all produced as one three-week long film divided and released in nine instalments in nine years. Despite being produced as one 72-hour film, the Chandler Saga would be split into three trilogies: an Original Trilogy, a Prequel Trilogy, and a Sequel Trilogy.

The films would be released in 2-3 hour cuts on standard cinemas as a Standard Edition with the full 8-hour Special Editions being released exclusively in IMAX. The 8-hour Special Editions would also have intermissions every two hours with each quarter of the film having its own episode title of sorts.

Villeneuve would capture the grandiose epic feeling of the Chris Chan Saga while Lynch and Jodorowsky would bring in the weirdness and creepiness.

It should be told as an unbiased, yet cautionary retelling of the entire Chris Chan Saga, down to the most minute details.

And the Chris Chan Cinematic Universe can be expanded with spinoff TV shows or movies based on Sockness, Bella and many more, as well as an Adult Swim cartoon adaptation of Sonichu, taken directly from the films as they would also adapt the Sonichu Saga in poor animation true to the artistic "genius" of Chris Chan.

The Sonichu animation and the VFX would all be done in the Philippines, with MS Paint animation and 16-bit VFX similar to GMA Network's Daig Kayo ng Lola Ko. With the VFX and animation keeping the iconic cheapness and crappiness of Daig Kayo ng Lola Ko; a show that airs on national TV with even worse production values than most random unknown YouTubers, with animation worse than 12 oz. Mouse and CGI worse than Sega Genesis graphics.
No, it isn't some random schmuck making YouTube shitposts or some random public access TV show, it's a major network TV show with big-name celebrities attached, yet it looks worse than random shitposts on YouTube, to the point that they unironically use MS Paint and Comic Sans, as well as the CLANG from Berserk (2016).

I do not know who should star in this saga but it will be the ultimate epic known to cinema. And it would also be some of the longest films to be released in mainstream cinemas, as well as the longest film split into multiple parts. For the 10th Anniversary, the films would get re-released in an omnibus cut that shows the Special Editions of each film back-to-back in chronological order in the span of 3 full days.

After the home video release of the films, they would also be available on streaming as a TV series with each season covering one movie in four episodes that are two hours each (covering the eight hours of the Special Editions). These four episodes combined would actually still be longer than WandaVision, which is just 10 minutes short of being 6 hours long, and it's 9 episodes; it would still take more time to marathon an entire season of New Girl, though, comparing to another show on Disney+.
These Special Series Editions may be the only feasible way to release the Special Editions while not sacrificing the quality too much, with each disc containing an episode of the series.
The Blu-rays will have both the standard theatrical film and extended TV series versions.

 

[Rogowski]

Jonah Hill as Chris.
Betty White as Barb.
Kristen Stewart as Meghan Schrodinger.
John Goodman as Michael Snyder
Shia LaBeouf as the voice of Sonichu.
Seth MacFarlane as vocal talent for the horde of other imaginary friends.
Kristen Schall as vocal talent for female animated characters.
Bryan Cranston as his attorney.
Ryan Reynolds and Seth Rogan as the arresting officers.
Narrated By Phil LaMarr.
Directed by Wes Anderson.
With Michael Bay as director of photography/special effects.

I think Wes Anderson would be great for the fact that Bill Murray would get his obligatory role as Robertchu and it would be great to see him offer his take on Bob’s DO YOU REALIZE monologue