Winners
Written
My Vote - Tranhuviya
Kiwi Vote - Tranhuviya
Dyn/OwO - N/A
Artwork
My Vote - All three entries are getting something for their work
Kiwi Vote - Nyess
Dyn/OwO Vote - Nyess
Entries
Written
Shibbolethal
Sailor_Jupiter
Tranhuviya
Alex_theman (Entry 2)
HinRai
Artwork
Sailor_Jupiter
Nyess
John Furrman
------------------------------------------------------------------
Prizes
Each category will have a top prize of a $25 gift card(Steam, Moneypack, LoL, Etc) or a Supporters tag for the farms.
Sub-categories (Fan/Dyn&OwO vote) have a prize of $15 each, respectively.
Additional prizes of $15 / $5 may be awarded if there are enough entries.
The Basics
I'm sure that most everybody here is well aware of Dynastia and the legacy that he has created for himself as a filthy abbo over the years, so I won't spare much time in going into detail about him, aside from the fact that he loves his meat pies with mustard on them.
What you might not have as much background or knowledge on, is our newer member OwO. OwO is a furry deviant who sexually identifies as a feline(possibly cheetah) and is without fail, another user dealing with a terminal case of GOTIS.
By no means are you restricted to solely following the information given above, as I do not intend to limit the... possibilities that this community is capable of coming up with.
The Categories
Written Work
The following were a few prompts that Dynastia offered when he was in chat earlier today, they might be worth extra points in regards to his decision
The Prizes
As of this point, I have not settled on a fixed prize pool for the winning entries as the farms provides for a rather unique situation where a cash or paypal prize is not the ideal manner in which to distribute things. Rest assured, there will be prizes for the top entries if there is enough interest in this contest, but as for exactly what they will be, I'm not sure.
I'm also open to suggestions for what should be in the prize pool, that can be distributed without revealing personal information in the process.
The current thought is pre-paid gift cards/green dot money cards and PMing the winners the number and suchnot
Prize Categories
****Note: additional prizes past 1st place will only be awarded if enough suitable entries are submitted for each category respectively. If there is only a small number of entries in one category, a prize will only be awarded to the top entry.
Entries
Written
Shibbolethal
Sailor_Jupiter
Tranhuviya
Alex_theman (Entry 2)
HinRai
Artwork
Sailor_Jupiter
Nyess
John Furrman
Dynastia's Stamp of Approval
EDIT: @Bitch I Might Be is jealous because it's not about her getting @Internet War Criminal's meaty cock.
Written
My Vote - Tranhuviya
Kiwi Vote - Tranhuviya
Dyn/OwO - N/A
Artwork
My Vote - All three entries are getting something for their work
Kiwi Vote - Nyess
Dyn/OwO Vote - Nyess
Entries
Written
Shibbolethal
Sailor_Jupiter
Tranhuviya
Alex_theman (Entry 2)
HinRai
Artwork
Sailor_Jupiter
Nyess
John Furrman
------------------------------------------------------------------
Prizes
Each category will have a top prize of a $25 gift card(Steam, Moneypack, LoL, Etc) or a Supporters tag for the farms.
Sub-categories (Fan/Dyn&OwO vote) have a prize of $15 each, respectively.
Additional prizes of $15 / $5 may be awarded if there are enough entries.
The Basics
- This contest will be open for an as of so far, undetermined period of time.
- Your entry to this contest can be either
autisticartistic in nature, or written - The main focus and minimum requirement for this contest revolves around @Dynastia & @OwO What's This?, they are a required component of your entry. Feel free to include other kiwis and cows as you see fit
- Your work needs to be ORIGINALTM
I'm sure that most everybody here is well aware of Dynastia and the legacy that he has created for himself as a filthy abbo over the years, so I won't spare much time in going into detail about him, aside from the fact that he loves his meat pies with mustard on them.
What you might not have as much background or knowledge on, is our newer member OwO. OwO is a furry deviant who sexually identifies as a feline(possibly cheetah) and is without fail, another user dealing with a terminal case of GOTIS.
By no means are you restricted to solely following the information given above, as I do not intend to limit the... possibilities that this community is capable of coming up with.
The Categories
Written Work
The following were a few prompts that Dynastia offered when he was in chat earlier today, they might be worth extra points in regards to his decision
- Only refer to him with female pronouns (So he can jack off to it)
- Only refer to OwO with male pronouns
- Would like Valiant to be in it, and killed
- Mention 'blown out taco pockets' in regards to OwO's orifices
- Details TBD
The Prizes
As of this point, I have not settled on a fixed prize pool for the winning entries as the farms provides for a rather unique situation where a cash or paypal prize is not the ideal manner in which to distribute things. Rest assured, there will be prizes for the top entries if there is enough interest in this contest, but as for exactly what they will be, I'm not sure.
I'm also open to suggestions for what should be in the prize pool, that can be distributed without revealing personal information in the process.
The current thought is pre-paid gift cards/green dot money cards and PMing the winners the number and suchnot
Prize Categories
- @Dynastia and @OwO What's This? Choice
- Kiwi Choice (Each Category)
- My Choice 1st/2nd/3rd**** (Each Category)
****Note: additional prizes past 1st place will only be awarded if enough suitable entries are submitted for each category respectively. If there is only a small number of entries in one category, a prize will only be awarded to the top entry.
Entries
Written
Shibbolethal
Sailor_Jupiter
Tranhuviya
Alex_theman (Entry 2)
HinRai
Artwork
Sailor_Jupiter
Nyess
John Furrman
Dynastia's Stamp of Approval
EDIT: @Bitch I Might Be is jealous because it's not about her getting @Internet War Criminal's meaty cock.
Nothing Here Yet
OwO What’s This?: A deviant furry and known Hillary supporter. Requested that I use “zey/zem” pronouns, but compromised on “he/him” so that Dynastia could jerk off.
Dynastia: A beautiful magical unicorn, and a fine upstanding member of the Kiwifarms community. Asked that I use “she/her” pronouns so that he could jerk off.
The Trump Supporters: A terrible hivemind, hired by Null to kill OwO.
Valiant: Put in fic after Dynastia requested it. It was also specified that she must die.
Ugly Stranger: An ugly stranger.
Dynastia: A beautiful magical unicorn, and a fine upstanding member of the Kiwifarms community. Asked that I use “she/her” pronouns so that he could jerk off.
The Trump Supporters: A terrible hivemind, hired by Null to kill OwO.
Valiant: Put in fic after Dynastia requested it. It was also specified that she must die.
Ugly Stranger: An ugly stranger.
It was a beautiful day outside, and kiwifarms user OwO What's This was having a lovely time posting on the forums. All of the sudden, he got a private message from a new user named [REDACTED]. "come outside", it said. OwO, not even slightly perturbed by the ominous nature of the message, stood up and walked outside.
The stench hit him first. It was the smell of chewing tobacco and stress-sweat, the smell of a working man who had just gotten into a violent barfight with a very tan person that they thought was Mexican, but magnified a thousand times. Fifteen red-faced men in “Make America Great Again” hats and shirts stood in front of OwOs’ house, glistening slightly in the mid-morning sun. One of them coughed. Then, they began to speak in unison. “Vote for Trump,” they said at once in the same twanging accent. “Vote for Trump.” OwO stood in their front yard, looking impassive but still somewhat anxious. How did the Trump Supporters know that he was going to vote for Hillary?
As the Trump supporters slowly closed in, OwO came to a chilling realization. This was Null’s doing. He knew what he had to do. There was only one man who could save him now, and he slowly took his phone out of his pocket, breathing through his mouth in an attempt to ignore the pungent Trump-smell.
It took him longer to dial than normal, as his hands were starting to sweat from the sheer heat radiating off of the Trump Supporters. Condensation was forming on the windows of his house. Luckily, he didn’t even need to say anything. The person on the other side knew exactly what kind of situation OwO was in, and exactly what needed to be done.
All of a sudden, without warning, there was a thunderous noise, like 8 trash-cans being thrown onto the ground and rolling around all at once. Behind the Trump Supporters, OwO observed a figure atop Valiant, gloriously backlit by the sun. It was Dynastia. All things to all people, she looked exactly like you’d expect her to. OwO’s blown out taco pockets began to grow moist.
Slowly, with great purpose and grace, Dynastia dismounted and then kicked Valiant in the throat, severing her jugular with the obsidian blades attached to their feet. The Trump Supporters were silent. OwO was silent. Valiant gurgled gently as she died. For a moment, it was almost tranquil, and OwO felt calm. Everything was going to be okay now.
The Trump Supporters finally turned around, pulling their hats lower to shade their eyes both from the sun and the multicolored prisms of light that reflected off of Dynastias’ body. “Dynastia,” they hissed, “you’ve come. Just as foretold in the prophecy.” Unperturbed by the hateful stares from the gang of Trump Supporters, Dynastia strode forwards. A single glance at OwO told her all she needed to know.
She spoke, and her voice was beautiful. “Hillary Rodham Clinton is a breathtaking woman and a true fighter, and she deserves the presidency.” The Trump Supporters began to shrink back, making guttural noises in the back of their throats. OwOs’ heart began to pound, not in fear, but in anticipation of what was to come.
Dynastia continued, resting one foot on Valiant’s corpse. “The only reason people are fighting this is because America simply isn't grown-up enough to handle a strong and charismatic woman like Hillary Rodham Clinton in charge.” The Trump Supporters shuddered in horror, wringing their hands and murmuring amongst themselves. They were planning, planning something big, and for the first time OwO felt.. Unsure. Dynastia was incredibly powerful, the Magical Unicorn Prince of both doxxing and cyberbullying, but the Trump supporters had dark magic of their own, not to mention the fact that Null was on their side.
Before OwO could finish thinking through the logistics of the battle to come, he felt something warm splash against his face. He looked up, eyes widening in awe as he took in the scene before him. It was Dynastia, in mid-air, arms spread and head turned back in the midst of an Australian Battle Dance. The blades on her feet sliced through the air, then through flesh, then bone, then the pulsing core of calcified hatred and fear that all Trump Supporters possessed. As the last Trump Supporter fell dead to the ground, OwO locked eyes with Dynastia.
Dyn walked towards him, stepping delicately over viscera and offal, still steaming in the chilly autumn air. OwO felt his knees grow weak. “You saved me..” He murmured, looking away from Dynastia for a moment. Holding her piercing gaze for too long would surely cause him a premature orgasm. “Of course I did,” she replied, reaching down to remove the head of OwO’s fursuit. He gasped quietly as Dynastia caressed his cheek, leaving behind a trail of slick Republican-juice.
“How could I ever repay you?” Asked OwO, despite knowing the answer to the question. Dynastia smiled at the question, taking a step back to slide off her Australian Battle Dancing Shoes. OwO slowly unzipped his fursuit, shivering in excitement. It was of no concern to them if their dark deeds occurred on his front lawn or in the privacy of OwO’s bedroom. A dog began barking in the distance, as if it could sense what was about to happen. Somewhere, Null began to vomit uncontrollably.
Dynastia was already fully erect, although it was impossible to tell if it was from looking at OwO or from the violent atrocities she had just committed. OwO sunk to his knees and licked his lips, at eye level with the pulsing horn that jutted proudly from between her hips. Without another word, he opened his mouth and started the agonizing task. His mouth was not nearly as gaped as his other orifices, and he could only get a quarter of the ponderous member down his throat before he started to gag.
“You can take more, can’t you?” Said Dynastia, her voice hoarse and thick with what was either lust or the beginnings of a bad cold. Most likely it was both, since she was standing outside naked in 60 degree weather. Unable to nod, OwO just gave a thumbs up and kept forcing more of the enormous rod down his throat. Still, no matter how hard he tried, he was unable to get the entirety of it inside of him.
Dynastia sighed fondly and pulled away, her member now thoroughly coated in mucus and spittle. “That’s enough.” OwO sniffed and wiped his mouth, lying down on the grass and spreading his legs. His cavernous cheetah vagina open and closed, wafting foul air towards Dyn, who inhaled deeply before flopping on top of him, sliding into the immense flesh-hole with ease.
There’s no way to tell how long they fucked. Time seemed to both speed up and stand still, most likely because their unholy coupling caused a minor wrinkle in space-time. Eventually, Dynastia reached her climax and flooded OwO with semen. Moments later, OwO made a noise like a dying animal, thrashing wildly underneath Dynastia before going limp. The two lay there for a minute, catching their breath, before Dyn finally got up and used part of OwO’s fursuit to clean herself up.
“I need to go.” Too tired to argue, OwO simply watched as she redressed and got ready to begin the long journey and dangerous journey back to Australia. Just as she was about to go, Dynastia paused, and knelt back down over her cum-splattered lover. “I will see you again one day.” She kissed him passionately on the mouth, and finally turned away. A single tear ran down OwO’s cheek as Dynastia became nothing but a silhouette against the setting sun.
A good while later, in the early hours of the morning, a young man came across OwO weeping in his front yard. He stood above him, confused but surprisingly not disgusted by the wretched sight before him. “Hello.” OwO looked up, wiping tears and bits of dried semen off of his face. “Who are you?” OwO asked.
The young man shrugged. OwO noticed that the stranger smelled faintly of cat urine, and was somehow even more visually repulsive than he was. “That doesn’t matter,” said the ugly man. “What happened to you?”
OwO sat up and gave a tired but wry smile. “It’s a long story.” The ugly stranger sat down a safe distance away from him and took out a notebook and a pencil, waiting for him to begin.
“It was a beautiful day outside..”
THE END
The stench hit him first. It was the smell of chewing tobacco and stress-sweat, the smell of a working man who had just gotten into a violent barfight with a very tan person that they thought was Mexican, but magnified a thousand times. Fifteen red-faced men in “Make America Great Again” hats and shirts stood in front of OwOs’ house, glistening slightly in the mid-morning sun. One of them coughed. Then, they began to speak in unison. “Vote for Trump,” they said at once in the same twanging accent. “Vote for Trump.” OwO stood in their front yard, looking impassive but still somewhat anxious. How did the Trump Supporters know that he was going to vote for Hillary?
As the Trump supporters slowly closed in, OwO came to a chilling realization. This was Null’s doing. He knew what he had to do. There was only one man who could save him now, and he slowly took his phone out of his pocket, breathing through his mouth in an attempt to ignore the pungent Trump-smell.
It took him longer to dial than normal, as his hands were starting to sweat from the sheer heat radiating off of the Trump Supporters. Condensation was forming on the windows of his house. Luckily, he didn’t even need to say anything. The person on the other side knew exactly what kind of situation OwO was in, and exactly what needed to be done.
All of a sudden, without warning, there was a thunderous noise, like 8 trash-cans being thrown onto the ground and rolling around all at once. Behind the Trump Supporters, OwO observed a figure atop Valiant, gloriously backlit by the sun. It was Dynastia. All things to all people, she looked exactly like you’d expect her to. OwO’s blown out taco pockets began to grow moist.
Slowly, with great purpose and grace, Dynastia dismounted and then kicked Valiant in the throat, severing her jugular with the obsidian blades attached to their feet. The Trump Supporters were silent. OwO was silent. Valiant gurgled gently as she died. For a moment, it was almost tranquil, and OwO felt calm. Everything was going to be okay now.
The Trump Supporters finally turned around, pulling their hats lower to shade their eyes both from the sun and the multicolored prisms of light that reflected off of Dynastias’ body. “Dynastia,” they hissed, “you’ve come. Just as foretold in the prophecy.” Unperturbed by the hateful stares from the gang of Trump Supporters, Dynastia strode forwards. A single glance at OwO told her all she needed to know.
She spoke, and her voice was beautiful. “Hillary Rodham Clinton is a breathtaking woman and a true fighter, and she deserves the presidency.” The Trump Supporters began to shrink back, making guttural noises in the back of their throats. OwOs’ heart began to pound, not in fear, but in anticipation of what was to come.
Dynastia continued, resting one foot on Valiant’s corpse. “The only reason people are fighting this is because America simply isn't grown-up enough to handle a strong and charismatic woman like Hillary Rodham Clinton in charge.” The Trump Supporters shuddered in horror, wringing their hands and murmuring amongst themselves. They were planning, planning something big, and for the first time OwO felt.. Unsure. Dynastia was incredibly powerful, the Magical Unicorn Prince of both doxxing and cyberbullying, but the Trump supporters had dark magic of their own, not to mention the fact that Null was on their side.
Before OwO could finish thinking through the logistics of the battle to come, he felt something warm splash against his face. He looked up, eyes widening in awe as he took in the scene before him. It was Dynastia, in mid-air, arms spread and head turned back in the midst of an Australian Battle Dance. The blades on her feet sliced through the air, then through flesh, then bone, then the pulsing core of calcified hatred and fear that all Trump Supporters possessed. As the last Trump Supporter fell dead to the ground, OwO locked eyes with Dynastia.
Dyn walked towards him, stepping delicately over viscera and offal, still steaming in the chilly autumn air. OwO felt his knees grow weak. “You saved me..” He murmured, looking away from Dynastia for a moment. Holding her piercing gaze for too long would surely cause him a premature orgasm. “Of course I did,” she replied, reaching down to remove the head of OwO’s fursuit. He gasped quietly as Dynastia caressed his cheek, leaving behind a trail of slick Republican-juice.
“How could I ever repay you?” Asked OwO, despite knowing the answer to the question. Dynastia smiled at the question, taking a step back to slide off her Australian Battle Dancing Shoes. OwO slowly unzipped his fursuit, shivering in excitement. It was of no concern to them if their dark deeds occurred on his front lawn or in the privacy of OwO’s bedroom. A dog began barking in the distance, as if it could sense what was about to happen. Somewhere, Null began to vomit uncontrollably.
Dynastia was already fully erect, although it was impossible to tell if it was from looking at OwO or from the violent atrocities she had just committed. OwO sunk to his knees and licked his lips, at eye level with the pulsing horn that jutted proudly from between her hips. Without another word, he opened his mouth and started the agonizing task. His mouth was not nearly as gaped as his other orifices, and he could only get a quarter of the ponderous member down his throat before he started to gag.
“You can take more, can’t you?” Said Dynastia, her voice hoarse and thick with what was either lust or the beginnings of a bad cold. Most likely it was both, since she was standing outside naked in 60 degree weather. Unable to nod, OwO just gave a thumbs up and kept forcing more of the enormous rod down his throat. Still, no matter how hard he tried, he was unable to get the entirety of it inside of him.
Dynastia sighed fondly and pulled away, her member now thoroughly coated in mucus and spittle. “That’s enough.” OwO sniffed and wiped his mouth, lying down on the grass and spreading his legs. His cavernous cheetah vagina open and closed, wafting foul air towards Dyn, who inhaled deeply before flopping on top of him, sliding into the immense flesh-hole with ease.
There’s no way to tell how long they fucked. Time seemed to both speed up and stand still, most likely because their unholy coupling caused a minor wrinkle in space-time. Eventually, Dynastia reached her climax and flooded OwO with semen. Moments later, OwO made a noise like a dying animal, thrashing wildly underneath Dynastia before going limp. The two lay there for a minute, catching their breath, before Dyn finally got up and used part of OwO’s fursuit to clean herself up.
“I need to go.” Too tired to argue, OwO simply watched as she redressed and got ready to begin the long journey and dangerous journey back to Australia. Just as she was about to go, Dynastia paused, and knelt back down over her cum-splattered lover. “I will see you again one day.” She kissed him passionately on the mouth, and finally turned away. A single tear ran down OwO’s cheek as Dynastia became nothing but a silhouette against the setting sun.
A good while later, in the early hours of the morning, a young man came across OwO weeping in his front yard. He stood above him, confused but surprisingly not disgusted by the wretched sight before him. “Hello.” OwO looked up, wiping tears and bits of dried semen off of his face. “Who are you?” OwO asked.
The young man shrugged. OwO noticed that the stranger smelled faintly of cat urine, and was somehow even more visually repulsive than he was. “That doesn’t matter,” said the ugly man. “What happened to you?”
OwO sat up and gave a tired but wry smile. “It’s a long story.” The ugly stranger sat down a safe distance away from him and took out a notebook and a pencil, waiting for him to begin.
“It was a beautiful day outside..”
THE END
The wind whistled softly, blowing tumbleweeds and circular kangaroo droppings across the barren desert, almost as if it was tired of its lonely, thankless duty. Dust partially occluded the scattering shades of the sunset, creating a storm of oscillating rouges and liquid golds like the provernial smelter's furnace. A dingo howled distantly, its mournful cry adding to the desolation of the scene. Wait!- there, amidst the shadows, a figure can be noticed- a firm, resolute man, nodding under a wide-brimmed hat. He had the demeanor of an adventurer from a previous era: brashness and impetuosity mingled with LOTS OF MEAT PIES OH GOODNESS HE'S EATING ONE NOW EVEN IN HIS SLEEP WHAT THE... Now, as I was saying, this was no mere mortal: this was @Dynastia, the spirit of the plains!- an adventurer in the Outback whose renown had spread as far as America! Powered by aboriginal blood, ill-advised Internet posts, and his famous meat pies, this brave man singlehandedly fought an entire herd of kangaroos with only a candy bar wrapper- and won!
Now, the brave man stirs... And informs us that he would "really prefer feminine pronouns, if you please!" Very well... What brings @Dynastia, that most rugged of unshaven bearded ladies, too this most desolate corner of the earth- desolate even for him, who had wrestled alligators and wrangled at least one SJW feminist..? Surely some great adventure awaits... her. But what can it be?! A dragon, a vampiric wallaby, or... a love story?!
Yes, is true! @Dynastia, no stranger to deadly biological hazards living in the bosom of Australia, has now embarked upon that most harrowing adventure of all: courtship. And what is the object of the dubious lady's affections? No less than Owo, the most autistic furfag to grace our forums since the days of Wildchild! A beautiful, svelte, human(?) woman who prefers the company of cheetahs, this lady Tarzan is a suitable match for our meat-eating hero(ine?) This is a secret lovers' meating!(sp) Owo, who prefers male pronouns, slinks into view in a slight animal-skin garment that makes the most of his(?) figure and flopping melon breasts.
"@Dynastia," he whispers, adjusting his furkini and sliding closer, "I brought you a meat pie like you like!" His(?) voice was high-pitched, sultry, and smooth. @Dynastia could perceive his hot breath on her face, and smoooooooooshed between Owo's two BIG FAT SACKS, she(?) felt her manly resolve wavering.
"But... what about your... husband, Teddy Roosevelt?" she panted.
"Dingo got him," Owo said blunty, his (?) downcast face and tear-filled eyes resting on his GIANT FAT SACKS belying the apparent harshness of his statement. "Dingo got the babies, too!" Now the tears were noticeably falling into his(?) GIANT FAT SACKS and @Dynastia didn't know what to do. One misstep, and she(?)'d end up paying alimony. Owo suddenly looked up from her tears,
"@Dynastia! I WANT YOU TO KILL THEM!" He(?) shrieked, his (?) anguished cry interspersed with sobs. "I WANT YOU TO AVENGE MY HUSBAND ON THOSE VILE DINGOS!"
@Dynastia gazed in amazement. She(?)'d never seen such emotion from the usually calm and clear-headed Owo. She(?)'d also never before seen how unflattering Owo's mouth looked when open- honestly, it was just like a blown-out taco pocket! A wave of revulsion swept over her(?,) which she struggled, unsuccessfully, to contain. Extricating her(?)self from Owo's GIANT FAT SACKS, @Dynastia took a moment, then speaking, said
"That would mean... Killing @Valiant, their leader- a Wildchild who has been raised by the dingos after his parents abandoned him on an all-night binge! He is a fearsome opponent. Amongst all WILDCHILDren (who need to be unbanned!,) @Valiant alone has mastered the ancient killer technique of the dingos: the upchuck Gatlin-gun!" @Dynastia wiped a bit of sweat that was trickling down her manly, feminine beard, and unconsciously fingered her gun. Was she up to this? And what was worse, @Valiant's parents had been old drinking buddies, before @Dynastia had to leave the town after killing a man during a duel. Could @Dynastia harden her(?) heart enough to take out their little tardlet? She gulped, and stated:
"I'll try. "
Now, the brave man stirs... And informs us that he would "really prefer feminine pronouns, if you please!" Very well... What brings @Dynastia, that most rugged of unshaven bearded ladies, too this most desolate corner of the earth- desolate even for him, who had wrestled alligators and wrangled at least one SJW feminist..? Surely some great adventure awaits... her. But what can it be?! A dragon, a vampiric wallaby, or... a love story?!
Yes, is true! @Dynastia, no stranger to deadly biological hazards living in the bosom of Australia, has now embarked upon that most harrowing adventure of all: courtship. And what is the object of the dubious lady's affections? No less than Owo, the most autistic furfag to grace our forums since the days of Wildchild! A beautiful, svelte, human(?) woman who prefers the company of cheetahs, this lady Tarzan is a suitable match for our meat-eating hero(ine?) This is a secret lovers' meating!(sp) Owo, who prefers male pronouns, slinks into view in a slight animal-skin garment that makes the most of his(?) figure and flopping melon breasts.
"@Dynastia," he whispers, adjusting his furkini and sliding closer, "I brought you a meat pie like you like!" His(?) voice was high-pitched, sultry, and smooth. @Dynastia could perceive his hot breath on her face, and smoooooooooshed between Owo's two BIG FAT SACKS, she(?) felt her manly resolve wavering.
"But... what about your... husband, Teddy Roosevelt?" she panted.
"Dingo got him," Owo said blunty, his (?) downcast face and tear-filled eyes resting on his GIANT FAT SACKS belying the apparent harshness of his statement. "Dingo got the babies, too!" Now the tears were noticeably falling into his(?) GIANT FAT SACKS and @Dynastia didn't know what to do. One misstep, and she(?)'d end up paying alimony. Owo suddenly looked up from her tears,
"@Dynastia! I WANT YOU TO KILL THEM!" He(?) shrieked, his (?) anguished cry interspersed with sobs. "I WANT YOU TO AVENGE MY HUSBAND ON THOSE VILE DINGOS!"
@Dynastia gazed in amazement. She(?)'d never seen such emotion from the usually calm and clear-headed Owo. She(?)'d also never before seen how unflattering Owo's mouth looked when open- honestly, it was just like a blown-out taco pocket! A wave of revulsion swept over her(?,) which she struggled, unsuccessfully, to contain. Extricating her(?)self from Owo's GIANT FAT SACKS, @Dynastia took a moment, then speaking, said
"That would mean... Killing @Valiant, their leader- a Wildchild who has been raised by the dingos after his parents abandoned him on an all-night binge! He is a fearsome opponent. Amongst all WILDCHILDren (who need to be unbanned!,) @Valiant alone has mastered the ancient killer technique of the dingos: the upchuck Gatlin-gun!" @Dynastia wiped a bit of sweat that was trickling down her manly, feminine beard, and unconsciously fingered her gun. Was she up to this? And what was worse, @Valiant's parents had been old drinking buddies, before @Dynastia had to leave the town after killing a man during a duel. Could @Dynastia harden her(?) heart enough to take out their little tardlet? She gulped, and stated:
"I'll try. "
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