Personal Lolcows: Tumblr Edition - A website like Tumblr tends to breed exceptional individuals

Meowthkip

We had fun, didn't we?
True & Honest Fan
Retired Staff
kiwifarms.net
I'm on Tumblr and I swear I've never found any lolcow (I follow lily orchid to keep an eye on the drama) like it surprises me considering how Tumblr is a lolcow or sad cow (and other cow types) festival

Since you aggregate your own Tumblr experience, you must be a mythical, blessed being who just has somehow not come across any of the crazies... or your bar for what constitutes as a "lolcow" is higher than most.
 
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Wes Bluemarine

The Prince of Greed and a E-Boy model
kiwifarms.net
I'm on Tumblr and I swear I've never found any lolcow (I follow lily orchid to keep an eye on the drama) like it surprises me considering how Tumblr is a lolcow or sad cow (and other cow types) festival
Usually, Tumblr lolcows ripe for the taking might be hiding in their natural habitats including the Wiccan/Witch/Magic tag
otherwise, they're pretty underground if you don't follow many people
 

Meowthkip

We had fun, didn't we?
True & Honest Fan
Retired Staff
kiwifarms.net
A lolcow doesn't just describe someone with a thread. A lolcow can be the people you see in your neighborhood each day.

My shorthand definition for what makes somebody a lolcow is bizarre, spectacular behavior + a complete and total lack of any kind of self-awareness, resulting in a person who becomes a laughing stock. Public meltdown videos are basically people displaying lolcow traits in little bite-sized chunks, though the majority of these people are not weird enough to be proper lolcows, but then you get somebody like The Bagel Boss, whose behavior is odd enough to earn him a thread here... though he's been considered an inactive cow since his stroke.

He's like one of the most accessible mainstream cows, but again he made a spectacle of himself, and he didn't have the self-awareness to realize that what he was doing was only making him look like a fool. Tumblr's curated experience provides an echo chamber that can either bring out lolcow-ish behavior in already odd individuals, or further enforce a lolcow's deluded self-image and exacerbate their narcissistic traits.

So if you saw somebody acting like a fucking moron on Tumblr and they just keep doubling down and refusing to admit that they're doing anything that would earn the derision of strangers, and this regular behavior from them, hey, guess what, that person is a lolcow.
 

PinstripeLuns

Oy vey!
kiwifarms.net
What is it with Tumblrites and thinking they're above the law? Found a flop account (cringe accounts that started on Tumblr) that's assmad that Redbubble won't sell their retextures of Minecraft sprites.

What's funny is that they're over-pricing them, but they're claiming that Redbubble is scamming them because they didn't their money yet. Oh yeah, they hate the rich by the way lol.
 

LinkinParkxNaruto[AMV]

I try so hard and got so far
kiwifarms.net
I dropped out of tumblr before the PC sjw enby lgbt thing took over so i didn´t quite experience it full force. While i was there tumblr was still drawing edgy subcultures and hipsters were very much a thing. Pretty much the entire alternative and indie music scene from that time and classic subcultures like goths and metalheads socialized there, sometimes it even felt more like r9k than what tumblr would eventually become. The dramas i got to see were kind of what you´d expect from edgy college kids, forgetable, lots of cheating accusations, lots of cases of revenge porn, exposing hos, bands shit flinging at each other, bdsm people exposing TMI about their sex life, drug addicts calling other junkies junkies...

One really funny highlight was Daveneo, he was a douchebag that pretended to be a player, made up fake girlfriends and i guess lots of people from that scene knew him or knew about him since he was one of those hangers on that bounces around. At one point he was leaving comments in in his own ask box pretending to a jealous woman who wanted to fuck him and was obsessed with him, while also pretending to be his "girlfriend" who was jealous of the other one, problem is , he forgot to check the box to send it anonymously, exposing himself bigtime. It went really viral super fast and was screencaptured before he could even delete it, it was a burn for the ages.

"and tell your little girlfriend she should remove the anon, really, i want your msn, your facebook, your lips, your everything"


tumblr_lfxayghKcg1qbft20o1_1280.jpg
 

joj valjoj

rogue leftist :(
kiwifarms.net
Genuinely considering making a racefakers of tumblr thread, with a focus on SJWs who cling to "reconnecting" to negligible or non-existent heritage, exclusively of cultures that tumblr finds exotic and marginalized, to get clout in social justice circles. If I find a few more consistent lolcows I'll definitely start a thread.
I agree a racefaker thread would be funny, although like other people said it's kind of hard to determine whether someone is actually racefaking or if they really are just white-passing, so the thread would likely devolve into a mess of throwing actual mixed people under the bus because they acted like idiots on a site populated by idiots.
 

KyouKasoya

punishment to those who can not be forgiven
kiwifarms.net
Girlfriendluvr definitely doesn't get brought up enough, and her dni list is even longer now.

There's a lot to unpack here
  • is anyone unironically PRO-COP. Like. Does anyone label themselves as such other than extremists
  • "think reverse oppression is real" one more time for the people in the back: semantics. Oppression =/= hate
  • "classist", says the kind of user who would tell the middle class to die for being millionnaire pricks, or whatever.
  • Tumblr users when they realize "pedophile" is an umbrella term- I'm not trying to defend MAPs. But MAPs are specifically PROUD pedophiles, whereas simply being a pedophile is not something you control and you need to seek medical help. MAPs will simply refuse and lolicons won't give a shit
  • "fan of David Bowie" wtf did he do now?
  • "think bi women can't be butch/femme" now that's a problem I have never encountered. Maybe it's a you problem? Where I live people don't really care about your gender/presentation relationship
Label me autistic if you wish, I am just bored and want to rant for a bit.
Maybe I should get to actually archiving stuff on my personal lolcow.
 

Meowthkip

We had fun, didn't we?
True & Honest Fan
Retired Staff
kiwifarms.net
"fan of David Bowie" wtf did he do now?

Lori Maddox claimed with him when she was 14 and he was in his 20's. There is some... doubt about how accurate her version of events are. She also brags about this. This is a point of pride for her.

She has been confirmed for dating Robert Plant when she was still underage, though, but for whatever reason it's Bowie that gets all the hate from these dummies,
 

Kamen

I hate kids with anime profile pics
kiwifarms.net
There's a lot to unpack here
  • is anyone unironically PRO-COP. Like. Does anyone label themselves as such other than extremists
  • "think reverse oppression is real" one more time for the people in the back: semantics. Oppression =/= hate
  • "classist", says the kind of user who would tell the middle class to die for being millionnaire pricks, or whatever.
  • Tumblr users when they realize "pedophile" is an umbrella term- I'm not trying to defend MAPs. But MAPs are specifically PROUD pedophiles, whereas simply being a pedophile is not something you control and you need to seek medical help. MAPs will simply refuse and lolicons won't give a shit
  • "fan of David Bowie" wtf did he do now?
  • "think bi women can't be butch/femme" now that's a problem I have never encountered. Maybe it's a you problem? Where I live people don't really care about your gender/presentation relationship
Label me autistic if you wish, I am just bored and want to rant for a bit.
Maybe I should get to actually archiving stuff on my personal lolcow.
The best thing in my opinion is putting the MAP part basically right next to extra faggy shit like "don't follow me if you ship zim x dib".
 

fishercat

good for health, bad for education
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net

Don Dyker

Wegmens Crusader / Admitted Commie Dyke
kiwifarms.net
Last time I checked, Leninism and Communism were pretty much the same thing
I mean, no, not in 2020, but the “don’t follow me if you’re anti-communist, also don’t follow me if you’re a leninist” shit is very funny
 

I Hate Osomatsu

I really do
kiwifarms.net
User is long gone since 2017 but there was this person in the Beatles Cartoon fanbase who'd constantly lurk on other people's posts (including mine when I had a decently large blog in that fanbase) to look for people's hate posts about John Lennon. Even if it was a small thing like "Omg the Beatles Cartoon John is soo accurate to IRL John theyre both evil" they'd type REALLY long drawn out replies to them, about how Real John Lennon was a perfect person who totally never beat his wives or son or some other bullshit nobody cares about.

Also they were John Lennon Factkin. Deactivated iirc because a famous artist called them an idiot.
 

Don Dyker

Wegmens Crusader / Admitted Commie Dyke
kiwifarms.net
User is long gone since 2017 but there was this person in the Beatles Cartoon fanbase who'd constantly lurk on other people's posts (including mine when I had a decently large blog in that fanbase) to look for people's hate posts about John Lennon. Even if it was a small thing like "Omg the Beatles Cartoon John is soo accurate to IRL John theyre both evil" they'd type REALLY long drawn out replies to them, about how Real John Lennon was a perfect person who totally never beat his wives or son or some other bullshit nobody cares about.

Also they were John Lennon Factkin. Deactivated iirc because a famous artist called them an idiot.
John Lennon may have been responsible for the death of his original Beatles co-founder (the Wikipedia doesn't mention it but several people including biographers have speculated it; there's mixed reports of Lennon kicking Sutcliffe in the head in Germany during some kind or argument and that may have been what fractured his skull). I know that's much less substantiated than Lennon being garbage to his family but always fun to watch weird Beatles worshippers go off.
 

Seleviva

On tämä saatana työmaa
kiwifarms.net
Oh man this might be the juiciest gal you've heard of (warning: this is long as hell):

I don't sadly have many screenshots because I've blocked her crazy ass off from everywhere but when I knew her she was so off and I don't understand why I kept in touch with her for so long. Anyway, let's get to the story.
This person is around 28 years old girl (I'm going to call her Song from now on) who identifies as "nonbinary genderfluid" (don't ask me, her words), who "kins" a shit ton of different characters and goes to different "shifts" and all that juicy shit. I first met her via one game fandom when I was searching for discord servers to join on and everything goes great at first, she acts a bit weird but I shake it off due to the fact that the game we both liked is somewhat fucked up and people with different kind of problems like to join it and she was batshit crazy when it came to kin stuff. I never actually liked her even from the beginning but I stayed quiet about it because she was the op of the discord server and I really didn't want to lose few of the other members, but let me tell you - if you said something that didn't go exactly like she wanted to, she was going to rage about it.

Oh, you thank her for giving out information? Rage. How dare you thank her when the thing is for x group.
You think that trans people need dysphoria? Rage. How dare you offend her nonbinary-genderfluid identity.
You use the word "autism" when you talk about your autism? Rage. How dare you use the word autism when her self-diagnosed ass sits right there.
Or even better - one person was venting about wanting to kill herself and when one of the people tried to help her, Song started to rage about it as well because the suicidal person didn't want to speak to the other person at that time.

She was also one of those who whine about their life all the time and don't do anything to actually fix it. She claimed that she lived with her "abusive" roommate (ex boyfriend?) and was trying to get out of the situation, e-begging from time to time. She ended up moving in with one of her boyfriends or "queerplatonic friend" (yes, she was one of those kind of people) who happened to kin a shit ton of as well (not really surprising) and she ended up staying inside all the time, not working or anything while still whining that she doesn't have any money to do anything. All-in-all she was really cringy person to be around with and I'm surprised that I didn't block her ass earlier.

There was actually this really good guy in the server before he got kicked out because Song didn't like him, good humor, etc. and the last time when I heard of Song she still bitches about this guy, after around 6 months or so after he was kicked off from the server and she still lies about him to this day and I actually have screenshots of this one:
1604265094267.png
1604265178254.png

(She is the one with the red block) Oh - and by the way, the accusations were all fake that were spread by the guy's ex.

She has also told me to grow up when she accused me of stuff and I tried to defend myself (I'm a ton younger than she is and she was the one who was throwing the childish tantrums):

1604265331573.png


She has also accused me of being a pedophile for no other reason than dating a person one year younger than me.
Last but not least, it was a pain in the ass to block her because she has around 18 or more fucking users on tumblr.
 

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